His desire is to 'have' her, not to 'control' her.
The "sense" of my word 'have' is more loving in nature; the "sense" of my word 'control' is more hard/harsh in nature.
Any "sense" of 'possession' in this passage would be in a way more like 'have' and not in a way more like 'control'.
I just don't see the "sense" of 'control' - as some in this thread are proposing - in any of those verses. (Genesis 3:16, 4:7; Song of Solomon 7:10)
I think it is being [mentally] "superimposed" onto the verses of scripture. It is not really actually there in the 'grammar of the language'.
The "sense" of the word 'desire' in these verses is one of 'longing' - a natural yearning [of the heart].
It does not harmonize with the "sense" of 'control' - an intellectual intent [of the mind].
I might have to agree to disagree, friend. The passage is talking about the lover taking hold of the beloved's breasts - using her body - possessing her. Were it not talking about betrothed, it might be accurate to call it lust. Feminists might call this "objectifying" a woman - with the idea that this is wrong, because people can't be owned unless slavery, which is also wrong (as in, possessed).
This description fits in with sin's desire to possess Cain - to control him (remember, are we slaves to sin without Christ? Sin owns us - possesses us - without Christ. This fits also). It also fits in with the argument about the desire in Genesis 3 of women to possess men. But rather than possessing their bodies (as is typical for men to 'desire' from women), the woman 'desires' control of the man - not his body, but his skill, talents, strength etc. - what he can do.