The argument isn’t being made that one is right and one is wrong; it’s questioning why you choose a particular method and weighing the costs. 🙂 I am clearly for waiting.
That's your claim, but let's look at the way you worded things.
"Why don’t you wait upon the Lord?" - The very nature of that question suggests one is waiting upon the Lord and one is not waiting upon the Lord. If not waiting for God's direction, then you, by default, are going against it. So you have worded it, right at the beginning, that waiting IS the right way, because by not waiting you're not following God's direction.
"If you asked the Lord for a spouse, and God would let you know who that specific person is" - This reinforces your above statement further, by stating that waiting is God's way, and dating is not. Thereby making dating the wrong approach.
"they will justify their reason for dating" - If you see people who offer an opposing view to yours as 'justifying' their choice, that implies that the choice is wrong and needs justification at all.
"This is about trusting in the Lord" - So by waiting you're trusting God, but by dating you're not trusting God, is what you say here. That's clearly stating one is wrong.
"So, if God would provide you a spouse by you trusting in His timing and providence, and Him letting you know who it is when you meet the person, why would you subject yourself to dating?" - A repeat of what you said above.
"I am saddened to see people, more specifically sisters in Christ, go through heartache and pain, being dishonored, and mistreated. Devalued. They deserve better. You deserve better. I ask, why will you not wait upon the Lord?" - Here you relate dating (and apparently just women?) to 'heartache', 'pain', 'being dishonored', 'mistreated' and 'devalued'. If you align these things to dating, then clearly that shows one is better than the other.
"wouldn’t waiting upon the Lord be the ideal?" - Again putting waiting as superior to dating, thus making dating the wrong option.
"what stops you from now putting a pause on dating, putting your desires before God in prayer, and waiting for Him to bring that person into your life?" - This statement says that by dating you are not praying and trusting God. Obviously if one is seen as not trusting God that means it's wrong.
"What do you think your Heavenly Father thinks of the man you’re with or the men you’ve been looking at?" - So people dating are not being discerning and picking people not pleasing to God? I'm sure you'll deny that's what you meant, but that is what you have said just by the act of bringing it up at all.
"so in actuality we have the right to be with whomever we choose, regardless of the consequence
. Yet, God knowing all, would you not think it wise to seek the Lord’s counsel?" - Another statement that suggests by taking the option of dating you'll have the right to do what you want, but it's not what God wants. And also that one isn't trusting in God by doing so.
"The right date, both in terms of person and timing." - Well, you state it pretty plainly there, that it's the right way.
"The question is, do they intend to have a relationship that leads to marriage and death do you part, and if they do, why are they not waiting upon the Lord and His providence instead of subjecting themselves to the pains of dating? Again, people are free to date; I am asking why they don’t wait, instead
? Why go through the process of examination and elimination when they can just wait for God’s providence?" - Dating is mans way, waiting is God's way, is what that says.
And i could go on, but i think this makes a clear point. You claim you're looking for a discussion, but yet your posts, right from the start, all point to one way being the right way. And you reinforce and drive home the same view again and again and again. If your goal was actually a discussion you would not so constantly and forcefully label your view as God's way and the other as outside of what God wants. You can't constantly push one view as God's way, then turn around and pretend you are just looking for people to answer a question.
This is what we see in the BDF all the time, people using neutral sounding questions to draw people in, when all they are really interested in is telling everyone their view is wrong. It's never about discussion, it's about cornering people and ambushing them. Not having open discussion. If discussion was your goal, and learning what motivates others, then you would not be constantly and relentlessly pushing the view you believe to be right, but you'd be focusing on hearing what others say and not wording things in a way that suggests one is inferior or wrong.
It's a rather passive/aggressive approach. You won't come straight out and say dating is wrong, but constantly paint it as being wrong. One doesn't need to say things directly to make their opinion known, especially when one repeats themselves in so many different ways as you. Or responds to Every response with 'but this way is God's way, that way is not'. That closes off all discussion because you're clearly not interested in listening, but rather using the question as a way to tell people what you believe is the right way. I'll pass.