Ok Everyone,
Here is the second part of the thread I wrote a few days ago (not that anyone out there was eagerly awaiting a sequel or anything
).
In the first thread, we talked about the issue of, what does it REALLY mean if someone tells you they've been thinking of you all day and can't wait to talk to you? We discussed what our experiences have been and when someone really means it... and really does not.
NOW, let's look at the FLIP side, shall we? Just to keep everyone honest!
Have YOU ever told SOMEONE ELSE something similar to the lines we just talked about, and have you really meant it, or were you just trying not to hurt their feelings? What are some other ways you've stalled or delayed conversation with someone you knew you weren't really interested in, or were you just direct about it from the start?
For me personally, I would never tell someone I had been thinking of them all day and that I couldn't wait to talk to them unless I really meant it from the heart, and if that were the case, it would mean I was pretty crazy over the person (either that or just plain crazy, I won't deny that either.)
However, if it's a potential dating situation and I know it's someone I'm not interested in but I want to spare their feelings, I do sometimes say something like, "Um, maybe we can talk again another time?" when in reality, I'm hoping they'll forget... I know, you can all scold me to be more honest! But also please advise me on a better way to let someone down...
I have a hard time flat-out snubbing someone unless they really offend me, like the guy on one dating site who kept IMing me every time I was online and I knew I wasn't interested... I tried to be nice, until he wrote that his favorite thing to do on a Sunday was curl up next to a woman and that it had been far too long since he' d had one in his bed. (I was thinking... "Um... is that my dryer beeping? Because I would rather be folding socks than having this conversation!")
In this case, I simply said, "I do NOT think we are a match--best wishes in your search," and closed the IM box immediately.
What about the rest of you? How far do you go in meaning what you say and saying what you mean, and what are some examples of ways you've either tried to skirt around the issue at hand (trying to politely let someone down) or maybe handle the situation in a much more direct or aggressive manner?
I'm looking forward to hearing your stories.
Here is the second part of the thread I wrote a few days ago (not that anyone out there was eagerly awaiting a sequel or anything
). In the first thread, we talked about the issue of, what does it REALLY mean if someone tells you they've been thinking of you all day and can't wait to talk to you? We discussed what our experiences have been and when someone really means it... and really does not.
NOW, let's look at the FLIP side, shall we? Just to keep everyone honest!
Have YOU ever told SOMEONE ELSE something similar to the lines we just talked about, and have you really meant it, or were you just trying not to hurt their feelings? What are some other ways you've stalled or delayed conversation with someone you knew you weren't really interested in, or were you just direct about it from the start?
For me personally, I would never tell someone I had been thinking of them all day and that I couldn't wait to talk to them unless I really meant it from the heart, and if that were the case, it would mean I was pretty crazy over the person (either that or just plain crazy, I won't deny that either.)
However, if it's a potential dating situation and I know it's someone I'm not interested in but I want to spare their feelings, I do sometimes say something like, "Um, maybe we can talk again another time?" when in reality, I'm hoping they'll forget... I know, you can all scold me to be more honest! But also please advise me on a better way to let someone down...
I have a hard time flat-out snubbing someone unless they really offend me, like the guy on one dating site who kept IMing me every time I was online and I knew I wasn't interested... I tried to be nice, until he wrote that his favorite thing to do on a Sunday was curl up next to a woman and that it had been far too long since he' d had one in his bed. (I was thinking... "Um... is that my dryer beeping? Because I would rather be folding socks than having this conversation!")
In this case, I simply said, "I do NOT think we are a match--best wishes in your search," and closed the IM box immediately.
What about the rest of you? How far do you go in meaning what you say and saying what you mean, and what are some examples of ways you've either tried to skirt around the issue at hand (trying to politely let someone down) or maybe handle the situation in a much more direct or aggressive manner?
I'm looking forward to hearing your stories.
