Where are all the real Christian men??

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Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
3,015
1,855
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Sometimes I wonder what a true Christian man is. I always believe it was a man who asked Jesus into his heart, and then did the best He could to follow the scriptures, in the way He lives. Asking Jesus into your heart is the easy part. Following the scriptures at all times isn't easy. Nobody is perfect, I think...
It's more than that. Many people invite Jesus into their hearts but do not get born again. I was one, at a Billy Graham meeting. I was not convicted that I was a sinner and my supposed commitment faded away in very little time. The parable of the sower explains what happens.

On the day of Pentecost, the listeners were "cut to the heart" and said, "what shall we do?". When I was saved properly, I was also cut to the heart. I realised that I was a sinner. I knew nothing of Acts 2 but I asked the same question. When I received Christ as Saviour, I knew that I was different. That was 50 years ago.

Trying to be a good Christian is a recipe for failure and defeat. We need to acknowledge that only Jesus can live the Christian life. As we learn to depend on Him, we will depend less on ourselves. Defeats will become less common and we will live more in victory. And yes, perfection is not possible in this lifetime. It helps to keep that in mind when looking for a spouse.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
38,936
15,117
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Tennessee
You and she took my comment the wrong way. What I was meaning was, where was the spiritual oversight that counselled her in the marriage agreement she was making. Assuming she got married in a church, the pastor should have had a reasonable handle on the spiritual status of the couple involved. Since her partner was an atheist, surely a pastor worth his stipend should have picked that up and refused to preside over the marriage. Therefore, if she has gone back to the same pastor or church for advice on divorce, then I would have to say that she would need to take any advice given with a grain of salt.
Maybe she didn't have spiritual oversight counsel in her marriage. What is this spiritual oversight that you are talking about? Why assume that she got married in a church?

I got married in my hotel room at the Hilton on the strip of Las Vegas in 2014. I wanted to get married in the Little Wedding Chapel down the road with Elvis performing the nuptials but my wife to be nixed that idea. We did get married by a local pastor of a SDA church.

I'm not to sure that a pastor is the best choice for counseling about divorce. She obviously made a poor choice. I certainly made a poor choice in my first marriage years ago in 1978. I got spiritual counseling too but to no avail. That's probably my bad.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
20,788
6,172
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I got married in my hotel room at the Hilton on the strip of Las Vegas in 2014. I wanted to get married in the Little Wedding Chapel down the road with Elvis performing the nuptials but my wife to be nixed that idea. We did get married by a local pastor of a SDA church.
YOU HERETIC!

Wait, that's someone else's line. My bad. I'll let him have it.
 

ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
1,133
414
83
Tin Can Bay
But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. - James 3:17
There's no argument from me there. We also need to be as shrewd as serpents. I stand by my assessment!
 

ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
1,133
414
83
Tin Can Bay
Maybe she didn't have spiritual oversight counsel in her marriage. What is this spiritual oversight that you are talking about? Why assume that she got married in a church?

I got married in my hotel room at the Hilton on the strip of Las Vegas in 2014. I wanted to get married in the Little Wedding Chapel down the road with Elvis performing the nuptials but my wife to be nixed that idea. We did get married by a local pastor of a SDA church.

I'm not to sure that a pastor is the best choice for counseling about divorce. She obviously made a poor choice. I certainly made a poor choice in my first marriage years ago in 1978. I got spiritual counseling too but to no avail. That's probably my bad.
My aim was to tease out the OP's spiritual understanding and status as best I could, and at the same time put some doubts into her mind as to whether the counselling she had received before and after marriage and the subsequent divorce could be trusted.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
20,788
6,172
113
My aim was to tease out the OP's spiritual understanding and status as best I could, and at the same time put some doubts into her mind as to whether the counselling she had received before and after marriage and the subsequent divorce could be trusted.
Heh.

I know seoulsearch. seoulsearch was at the meetup. YOU, sir, are no seoulsearch. :p
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
454
296
63
USA
There's no argument from me there. We also need to be as shrewd as serpents. I stand by my assessment!
Did the OP ask for one? She is asking advice and venting her frustration, and while we don't know her personally we are to be Scriptural in our conduct, especially with those most in need of a solid ground.

Without ever once being confrontational we can flesh out the heart of the matter in order to guide our Christian brothers and sisters when they struggle.

If you can't guide others in accordance with the Spirit, perhaps keeping opinions to oneself is the order of the day.
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
454
296
63
USA
There's no argument from me there. We also need to be as shrewd as serpents. I stand by my assessment!
To add to what I said above but when I say "guide" I mean add something that could potentially help with whatever the issue is going forward.

God forgives us when we go to Him and ask. From there - we have to go forward but we have to also overcome whatever may have caused the situation that's negative.

Since I've lived a fairly active and full life I often use said life as an example since there's been a lot I've successfully overcome in it. This shows people that better can exist with work.

So when advising, try using a time you've successfully overcome a similar issue and how that worked for you or a good book on the topic you found helpful and potentially scriptural.

Food for thought.
 

ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
1,133
414
83
Tin Can Bay
Did the OP ask for one? She is asking advice and venting her frustration, and while we don't know her personally we are to be Scriptural in our conduct, especially with those most in need of a solid ground.

Without ever once being confrontational we can flesh out the heart of the matter in order to guide our Christian brothers and sisters when they struggle.

If you can't guide others in accordance with the Spirit, perhaps keeping opinions to oneself is the order of the day.
In this instance, I don't agree with your opinion.
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
454
296
63
USA
In this instance, I don't agree with your opinion.
Just a small question, but did God not see us as sinners and give us a way out of that sin?

Or did He simply condemn us and keep condemning us until we figured it all out by ourselves.... maybe?
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
3,261
1,452
113
What's more important?

Winning the argument or winning the soul.
 

ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
1,133
414
83
Tin Can Bay
To add to what I said above but when I say "guide" I mean add something that could potentially help with whatever the issue is going forward.

God forgives us when we go to Him and ask. From there - we have to go forward but we have to also overcome whatever may have caused the situation that's negative.

Since I've lived a fairly active and full life I often use said life as an example since there's been a lot I've successfully overcome in it. This shows people that better can exist with work.

So when advising, try using a time you've successfully overcome a similar issue and how that worked for you or a good book on the topic you found helpful and potentially scriptural.

Food for thought.
I usually use a similar tact. In this instance however, given the responses from the OP and her posts elsewhere, my concern for her and other's wellbeing, IMO required a certain amount of bluntness to find out what her spiritual status is. I would hate to come before the Lord, and He asks me why I didn't intercede when signs were there that suggested a person's want for something might cause his or her, and anyone else involved, spiritual doom.

I considered whether or not I was being a bit too confrontational, and that someone on the side might think I'm on a mission to character assassinate someone and therefore miss the veracity or intent behind my questioning.

Just because you have had certain experiences in you own life, doesn't necessarily mean your judgement is right. We can sometimes quickly come to an empathetic feeling towards someone because their life experiences seem to be somewhat similar to ours, even though we are a bit scant on information.

Even after taking onboard your criticism and chastisement, and re-examining my approach, I still stand by what I have said, and my method.

I hope the OP is able to find a spiritually mature Christian lady that can get to know her in private, and can explain to her what being spiritually born again is, and help her on the path to reality. That person will not belong to a denomination, or have any denominational theological bias of any kind.
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
I would hate to come before the Lord, and He asks me why I didn't intercede when signs were there that suggested a person's want for something might cause his or her, and anyone else involved, spiritual doom.
My Ex was certainly a soul sucking demon from Hell! Where were you when I needed you Bro? Now what am l supposed to do... :oops:
 

ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
1,133
414
83
Tin Can Bay
My Ex was certainly a soul sucking demon from Hell! Where were you when I needed you Bro? Now what am l supposed to do... :oops:
And vice versa mate, vice versa.

I'm far from perfect, and my marital past is not dissimilar to yours. Anyway, I try to learn from my mistakes and remember them so I don't repeat them. After my marriage failed I didn't go on a vendetta to denigrate the character of my wife to justify my complaint of being wronged, but to analyse what was in my personal make up, and upbringing, that was antagonistic to my relationship. God led me to Jesus when He saw me looking, and deposited the gift of faith in me...Jesus then set about unravelling my past and pointing out where I had been wrong. I'm very cautious not to repeat those mistakes, because I wish to please God in everything I do, and I hate the taste of vomit!
 

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
Dec 8, 2014
986
298
63
Well

well my ex husband was abusive and made fun of me for believing in God Closer to the end of the relationship. I finally had had enough and left him.
Bible says be not unequally yolked with unbelievers, if your husband wasn't a born again christian I can tell you just from that one verse it was not the will of God for you to marry him.

Sorry to hear about what you went through with him,
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
People returning to their old sinful ways! Scripture indicates that would be akin to a dog returning to its vomit, and devouring it.
Proverbs 26-11
11Like a dog that returns to his vomit
is a fool who repeats his folly.

Good One!
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
My Ex used to get puking drunk all the time... almost forgot about that.

Anyway... You've already accused me of being seduced by Jezebel lol. What's your advice for me?