S
Hi,
I have a friend who has been married for 26 years. He is very gifted, nice and intelligent. Problem is he has suffered with depression and physical issues and his wife is angry with him for not being able to hold down a job. I can understand the stress it puts the family under, but does it give his wife permission to belittle him in front of others? Twenty years ago, I saw her lecturing him in front of our church and their two young boys for getting a motorcycle when they could not afford it. The husband just stood looking down like a whipped puppy.
He supported her in her new career and she works hard. She is now very successful and their boys are successful in their work. He has a part time job and he cleans and cooks for his wife and two boys so they can finish her education (which they do on top of working full time.)
But she and the boys treat him with contempt. One of his sons hates him for forcing his mother to work, but her work is her dream come true. She has withheld physicall intimacy with him for almost two years.
He couldn't take the neglect any longer and he tried to talk to her, telling her that he couldn't take it any longer - that they don't even have a relationship. His wife only does things with their sons, never with him.
He then said that he thought that they may have to separate to think about things. She went ballistic and argued with him. When he left the house, she and his sons took all his things and threw them in the driveway and road - they video taped it and told him to get his stuff before they destroy it.
He went over with a police officer to get his things. His son started yelling at him that he was worthless because he couldn't hold down a job and demanded the house key from him and pushing him. The police officer tried to calm the son but he was ballistic. I wonder if the only reason they tolerated him was because his name is on the house.
The mother is filing a TPO against the husband, saying that he was trying to get their son arrested.
How can we support and help this man? I have been praying that this doesn't turn into a nasty battle. For two days he was scared and white as a sheet. When asked what he was afraid of, he said he was afraid of what his wife and sons will do. I am so sad, and my heart hurts because of what is going on in this family. I don't know what to do.
I have a friend who has been married for 26 years. He is very gifted, nice and intelligent. Problem is he has suffered with depression and physical issues and his wife is angry with him for not being able to hold down a job. I can understand the stress it puts the family under, but does it give his wife permission to belittle him in front of others? Twenty years ago, I saw her lecturing him in front of our church and their two young boys for getting a motorcycle when they could not afford it. The husband just stood looking down like a whipped puppy.
He supported her in her new career and she works hard. She is now very successful and their boys are successful in their work. He has a part time job and he cleans and cooks for his wife and two boys so they can finish her education (which they do on top of working full time.)
But she and the boys treat him with contempt. One of his sons hates him for forcing his mother to work, but her work is her dream come true. She has withheld physicall intimacy with him for almost two years.
He couldn't take the neglect any longer and he tried to talk to her, telling her that he couldn't take it any longer - that they don't even have a relationship. His wife only does things with their sons, never with him.
He then said that he thought that they may have to separate to think about things. She went ballistic and argued with him. When he left the house, she and his sons took all his things and threw them in the driveway and road - they video taped it and told him to get his stuff before they destroy it.
He went over with a police officer to get his things. His son started yelling at him that he was worthless because he couldn't hold down a job and demanded the house key from him and pushing him. The police officer tried to calm the son but he was ballistic. I wonder if the only reason they tolerated him was because his name is on the house.
The mother is filing a TPO against the husband, saying that he was trying to get their son arrested.
How can we support and help this man? I have been praying that this doesn't turn into a nasty battle. For two days he was scared and white as a sheet. When asked what he was afraid of, he said he was afraid of what his wife and sons will do. I am so sad, and my heart hurts because of what is going on in this family. I don't know what to do.