I really think it depends on the situation, the people involved, and God's will. In some cases, some things can work against all odds and "common knowledge" and there are times when God loves to work in ways that leave us scratching our heads.
I've mentioned some of these things in other posts so I'll apologize in advance to all who know me a bit and are probably rolling their eyes already. I've had both good and bad cases of meeting people in person after correspondence, etc.
Back in college, I was on a forum/chat line for the first time and it wasn't quite as advanced as they are now, of course, but... let's see (trying to remember, it was a long time ago!) Over the years, I met four people that I can remember that I had talked to online--all were no more than 3 hours away. Two I didn't really click with at all in person, one was a girl I became friends with for a few years, and the fourth one... I married. (Another long story.) Even though it didn't work out, we were together 5 years and if the opportunity came again, I would definitely consider it again no matter where that person was in the world, if we were in love and it were God's will. I would gladly invite him to come visit me and hope he would do the same for me, though I might take a friend with me at first for safety issues.
I have a friend I've known since I was 15 and he met a girl online in Ukraine... went to meet her... and she had been pretending to know English the whole time... had been speaking through a translator, which might not have been a problem, but he found out a whole host of things he didn't know about as soon as he got off the plane (he's an American, in case I didn't mention that.)
But, he was also not one to give up. He met another girl from Russia--BEAUTIFUL girl, could easily be a model. They communicated for about 8 months, and then he went there for two weeks to stay with her and her family (I got to feed his fish while he was gone.) Not long after he came back, she came here for a few weeks--we went to Chicago and did some other things together--she's a great girl and intensely smart with two advanced degrees. He went back there for another few weeks... and the next time she came here, they got married. They've been married now for about 4 years, are very happy, and have a 2-year-old daughter.
So yes, I do think it can work!
One thing I have found that works for me, as I had a date with someone I'd met on one of the online sites last month--if it's not too far away, make sure you have your own ride and meet at a public place. Then, have something planned afterward, even if it's just calling a friend, and let that person know about it. For example, I told the guy, "I have to be to my friend's house by 4," because this way the person clearly knows that if you don't call or show up at a certain time, someone will come looking for you. I will admit that I think the guy was a little disappointed, but understanding (and we wound up not really clicking in person anyways), but I think it's a good safety measure to have, just in case.
I do make a few exceptions though. As I wrote in my profile, I'm going to see my friend Musical Me (Annetastic
) next month, and she and I met here on CC last year.
Do you guys remember the cartoon Pinky and the Brain? I recently emailed her:
"Are you contemplating what I'm contemplating, Pinky?"
"I think so, Brain... but what if the chickens don't want to wear underpants?" (One of the most classic lines, ever!)
I told Anne that obviously, between the two of us... she is Brain... and I'm Pinky!