I Love Myself Enough To Hate Myself To Change Myself????

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BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#1
Oct 7, 2012
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#1
Tricky title, eh? Yet true, while there are many verses that speak on contentment, does not discontentment lead to growth? Dissatisfaction, change? Is there such a thing as discontentment that isn't wrong and is holy, righteous, and good in that of not settling for less than what is possible? Why limit oneself?

I admit to hating myself in the present moment, but for good cause. I don't like where I am, and while hate may be unhealthy, it very well may be the catalyst for change. I see where I am, what is to be, and what I hope to be. The present torment, what to be bringing hope, and what I hope to be the culmination that'll be experienced then. It is looking forward, and yet I cannot live in the future. The future is created first in the past, as like a rock thrown into a pond creates ripples. It was thrown and it now has effects, which the now was then the future.

All of that to say, I must change. I have to change as it ever bears a burden upon my soul. It aches the heart, and it grieves my spirit. However, there is hope. I have God's word, His personal promises, and the disdain for the present moment. As I said, the hate then is a catalyst and yet God, and His words, the fuel.

What can you take from this? Push onward, hold dear to His promises because He is faithful, and don't be so comfortable that you reach a plateau and limit yourself. Keep growing, expanding, and being the person you are meant to be. Don't settle for less. What things that now burden you can be conquered, especially with the Lord.
 
trofimus

trofimus

Senior Member
#2
Aug 17, 2015
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#2
Like for the title :)
 
S

Stunnedbygrace

Senior Member
#3
Nov 12, 2015
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BenFTW said:
Tricky title, eh? Yet true, while there are many verses that speak on contentment, does not discontentment lead to growth? Dissatisfaction, change? Is there such a thing as discontentment that isn't wrong and is holy, righteous, and good in that of not settling for less than what is possible? Why limit oneself?

I admit to hating myself in the present moment, but for good cause. I don't like where I am, and while hate may be unhealthy, it very well may be the catalyst for change. I see where I am, what is to be, and what I hope to be. The present torment, what to be bringing hope, and what I hope to be the culmination that'll be experienced then. It is looking forward, and yet I cannot live in the future. The future is created first in the past, as like a rock thrown into a pond creates ripples. It was thrown and it now has effects, which the now was then the future.

All of that to say, I must change. I have to change as it ever bears a burden upon my soul. It aches the heart, and it grieves my spirit. However, there is hope. I have God's word, His personal promises, and the disdain for the present moment. As I said, the hate then is a catalyst and yet God, and His words, the fuel.

What can you take from this? Push onward, hold dear to His promises because He is faithful, and don't be so comfortable that you reach a plateau and limit yourself. Keep growing, expanding, and being the person you are meant to be. Don't settle for less. What things that now burden you can be conquered, especially with the Lord.
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I think this is a thirst for righteousness in your inner man, in your heart. After you have suffered for a little while, God himself will perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. These same experiences of suffering are being experienced by your brethren. (I think it was Peter who said all that...) In fact, he also said to not think it strange to find yourself in this fiery ordeal because it comes upon you for your testing. Silver that refuses to be tested, instead of submitting in trust, can't become more pure.
 
F

FreeNChrist

Guest
#4
#4
BenFTW said:
Tricky title, eh? Yet true, while there are many verses that speak on contentment, does not discontentment lead to growth? Dissatisfaction, change? Is there such a thing as discontentment that isn't wrong and is holy, righteous, and good in that of not settling for less than what is possible? Why limit oneself?

I admit to hating myself in the present moment, but for good cause. I don't like where I am, and while hate may be unhealthy, it very well may be the catalyst for change. I see where I am, what is to be, and what I hope to be. The present torment, what to be bringing hope, and what I hope to be the culmination that'll be experienced then. It is looking forward, and yet I cannot live in the future. The future is created first in the past, as like a rock thrown into a pond creates ripples. It was thrown and it now has effects, which the now was then the future.

All of that to say, I must change. I have to change as it ever bears a burden upon my soul. It aches the heart, and it grieves my spirit. However, there is hope. I have God's word, His personal promises, and the disdain for the present moment. As I said, the hate then is a catalyst and yet God, and His words, the fuel.

What can you take from this? Push onward, hold dear to His promises because He is faithful, and don't be so comfortable that you reach a plateau and limit yourself. Keep growing, expanding, and being the person you are meant to be. Don't settle for less. What things that now burden you can be conquered, especially with the Lord.
Click to expand...
If you really hated yourself wouldn't you be pleased with where you are??
 
P

pottersclay

Guest
#5
#5
You yourself my friend cannot add one measure of statue. It is God that adds.
When we find ourselves confronted with choices that are less than godly we should turn from them and seek godly council. This is the discipline that should be exercised in one's mind.
If we change our minds God will change our hearts.
 
88

88

Senior Member
#6
Nov 14, 2016
3,517
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#6
BenFTW said:
Tricky title, eh? Yet true, while there are many verses that speak on contentment, does not discontentment lead to growth? Dissatisfaction, change? Is there such a thing as discontentment that isn't wrong and is holy, righteous, and good in that of not settling for less than what is possible? Why limit oneself?

I admit to hating myself in the present moment, but for good cause. I don't like where I am, and while hate may be unhealthy, it very well may be the catalyst for change. I see where I am, what is to be, and what I hope to be. The present torment, what to be bringing hope, and what I hope to be the culmination that'll be experienced then. It is looking forward, and yet I cannot live in the future. The future is created first in the past, as like a rock thrown into a pond creates ripples. It was thrown and it now has effects, which the now was then the future.

All of that to say, I must change. I have to change as it ever bears a burden upon my soul. It aches the heart, and it grieves my spirit. However, there is hope. I have God's word, His personal promises, and the disdain for the present moment. As I said, the hate then is a catalyst and yet God, and His words, the fuel.

What can you take from this? Push onward, hold dear to His promises because He is faithful, and don't be so comfortable that you reach a plateau and limit yourself. Keep growing, expanding, and being the person you are meant to be. Don't settle for less. What things that now burden you can be conquered, especially with the Lord.
Click to expand...
*** Paul said forgettng those things behind us and pressing ahead for what God has for us*** Awesome....
 
stonesoffire

stonesoffire

Poetic Member
#7
Nov 24, 2013
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#7
Isn't one of the 10 commandments to love our neighbor as we love ourselves?

The commandments are good. What would be the good of loving our self? I can see one reason.

If we care for ourselves, we won't develop that false martyr complex where we become judgemental of others and bitter in heart.

It means to care for our own temple since we house God within doesn't it?

Hate the flesh? yes...but love our soul, body, spirit.
 
slave

slave

Senior Member
#8
Mar 20, 2015
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#8
I do love myself. But only rightly so for one reason; I do as God instructs; putting to death the things of the flesh, based on the premise of God's love who first loved me. There is no hating myself at all, nor is there any changing of myself, only surrendering of my self actively. - I listen closely to my spirit as the Holy Spirit makes clear HIS MESSAGE for things He would have me do. And it is then I obey Him immediately. This is God changing me not me; my obedience not withstanding. Thus, as I obey I do act as apart of my change, for sure, in so doing it, but it is not labelled mine, it is labelled: "Commissioned by God."
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#9
Oct 7, 2012
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#9
For the sake of context, this is about weight loss and becoming secure (financially) to be prepared for The One. Yet I can see how this can be applicable in other areas, and see why some of the responses are geared towards sin. Which, the responses, are excellent in those contexts. Thank you everyone for the responses, and encouragement (wisdom).
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#10
Oct 7, 2012
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#10
FreeNChrist said:
If you really hated yourself wouldn't you be pleased with where you are??
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One can hate their current status enough to change, but as stated in the title, it is the love that carries one through. Just as God hates sin, He loves the sinner. It is God's love that ignites His wrath. It is my disdain for my current reality and yet my love for self, that begs me to be better.
 
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FreeNChrist

Guest
#11
#11
BenFTW said:
One can hate their current status enough to change, but as stated in the title, it is the love that carries one through. Just as God hates sin, He loves the sinner. It is God's love that ignites His wrath. It is my disdain for my current reality and yet my love for self, that begs me to be better.
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Thats different than saying, "I hate myself". People will say things like, "I'm ugly, I hate myself". But if we really hated ourselves we would be glad we are ugly. It's a contradiction in terms. We say we hate ourselves but the truth is we really love ourselves, which is why we want to be better looking. ;)
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#12
Oct 7, 2012
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#12
FreeNChrist said:
Thats different than saying, "I hate myself". People will say things like, "I'm ugly, I hate myself". But if we really hated ourselves we would be glad we are ugly. It's a contradiction in terms. We say we hate ourselves but the truth is we really love ourselves, which is why we want to be better looking. ;)
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Yet, people do hate themselves in their current skin, which can lead to negative results such as people who struggle with anorexia. Some people's dislike for their self leads to positive change, on the flip side. I don't think hating oneself automatically equates with self-harm, but as I said earlier, can lead to a positive change for the better. You're looking at it as black and white, but that isn't the case.
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#13
Oct 7, 2012
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#13
FreeNChrist said:
Thats different than saying, "I hate myself". People will say things like, "I'm ugly, I hate myself". But if we really hated ourselves we would be glad we are ugly. It's a contradiction in terms. We say we hate ourselves but the truth is we really love ourselves, which is why we want to be better looking. ;)
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That isn't to say that I disagree with you. I also noted to this as sourced from love. One can love their self enough to hate their self in that of their current status. Maybe you can't wrap your mind around that wording because of your association to the word hate, but it is simply attempting to portray a discomfort that leads to change.
 
F

FreeNChrist

Guest
#14
#14
BenFTW said:
Yet, people do hate themselves in their current skin, which can lead to negative results such as people who struggle with anorexia. Some people's dislike for their self leads to positive change, on the flip side. I don't think hating oneself automatically equates with self-harm, but as I said earlier, can lead to a positive change for the better. You're looking at it as black and white, but that isn't the case.
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Naw. Its the world that tells us that our problem is that we all need to love ourselves more. But the Bible tells us the exact opposite. The Bible tells us that our problem is that we love ourselves too much. That the image we have of ourselves is a distorted image. That we have an exaggerated view of ourselves that is the very root of sin. It's pride.
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#15
Oct 7, 2012
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#15
FreeNChrist said:
Naw. Its the world that tells us that our problem is that we all need to love ourselves more. But the Bible tells us the exact opposite. The Bible tells us that our problem is that we love ourselves too much. That the image we have of ourselves is a distorted image. That we have an exaggerated view of ourselves that is the very root of sin. It's pride.
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God surely doesn't want us hating ourselves. :) In the sense that it doesn't lead to change, I suppose. haha Like I said, I am not talking about a hate that leads to destruction but is constructive.
 
F

FreeNChrist

Guest
#16
#16
I think He wants us loving others as we love ourselves. Our love for ourselves is a given.
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#17
Oct 7, 2012
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#17
FreeNChrist said:
I think He wants us loving others as we love ourselves. Our love for ourselves is a given.
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Anyways, this is more about the catalyst for change. What inspires you to change for the better? I don't necessarily mean about sin, but goals in life.
 
BenFTW

BenFTW

Senior Member
#18
Oct 7, 2012
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I always find it funny (not really) when people make it seem like loving ourselves is the go to. They equate it, the love, with selfishness but how narrow is such a perspective of those with wounded hearts. Not everyone loves themselves, but often times people are trodden down in the mire, defeated and hopeless.
 
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FreeNChrist

Guest
#19
#19
BenFTW said:
Anyways, this is more about the catalyst for change. What inspires you to change for the better? I don't necessarily mean about sin, but goals in life.
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Good question. As Christians, how do we change? Do we change ourselves or does God change us?
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#20
Jul 3, 2015
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#20
BenFTW said:
What inspires you to change for the better?
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For many, the equation seems to be:
When the pain of remaining the same becomes greater than the fear of change.
 
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