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S
My Apology:
I'm sorry I called you a coward.
I shouldn't have put you down.
I should never have said
all the things on here, or not
on here that were ever cruel to you
that I have said to make you feel bad
about yourself, but I did
...and I can't erase any of it..
Doesn't matter if you deserve it
or not. I was just wrong and its not
the Christian thing to do.
I've been feeling bad about it
a lot lately.
You don't have to forgive me or anything,
but I still want you to have some integrity or dignity..
I still think a lot of you.
You mean something to me.
I just have to let you know that.
I'm sorry I called you a coward.
I shouldn't have put you down.
I should never have said
all the things on here, or not
on here that were ever cruel to you
that I have said to make you feel bad
about yourself, but I did
...and I can't erase any of it..
Doesn't matter if you deserve it
or not. I was just wrong and its not
the Christian thing to do.
I've been feeling bad about it
a lot lately.
You don't have to forgive me or anything,
but I still want you to have some integrity or dignity..
I still think a lot of you.
You mean something to me.
I just have to let you know that.
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S
Jesus is alive,
and the proof is my testimony.
He gives me worth.
The Holy Spirit reveals the truth,
to warn me or give me peace about a situation.
He is my friend.
He preserves my life
just because he loves me.
though I go through trial and tribulation,
he has brought me through them all.
he never fails me.
He is all I need.
For as long as I live I will sing
my praise.
God's not dead.
and the proof is my testimony.
He gives me worth.
The Holy Spirit reveals the truth,
to warn me or give me peace about a situation.
He is my friend.
He preserves my life
just because he loves me.
though I go through trial and tribulation,
he has brought me through them all.
he never fails me.
He is all I need.
For as long as I live I will sing
my praise.
God's not dead.
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S
If I have to choose between you and God,
then I choose God.
If God doesn't want me to be with you,
then I won't be with you.
simple as that.
So if you want to move on with another girl
go ahead.
Don't threaten me,
that you are going to move on with another girl, if I don't
come crawling back to you.
just move on with the girl you are with.
She must really love you
if she is still with you.
treat her good and she'll treat you good.
don't treat people who love you bad or you
won't have anyone.
It won't destroy me if you move on.
I want you to be happy.
Besides God has something else in mind for me,
and I trust him with my heart. I believe in his word
more.
It's over between us,
I've made up my mind.
I don't want to be with you.
Its over...just move on.
its over.
then I choose God.
If God doesn't want me to be with you,
then I won't be with you.
simple as that.
So if you want to move on with another girl
go ahead.
Don't threaten me,
that you are going to move on with another girl, if I don't
come crawling back to you.
just move on with the girl you are with.
She must really love you
if she is still with you.
treat her good and she'll treat you good.
don't treat people who love you bad or you
won't have anyone.
It won't destroy me if you move on.
I want you to be happy.
Besides God has something else in mind for me,
and I trust him with my heart. I believe in his word
more.
It's over between us,
I've made up my mind.
I don't want to be with you.
Its over...just move on.
its over.
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S
The Waves that Tempt
by: Lowanla (me)
The forceful evening wind brings in the waves;
Disturbing the peace of a calm noonday.
Looking out among the shore;
Only fools crave all the more.
its so gentle, the water feels
warm like love pressing against my waist;
I -- desiring, no,
longing for
the pull of another wave,
happiness is bliss, but only until it fades.
I wish that this ocean tide would
sweep me away into it so quick and violent,
that finally I would be cradled inside at last;
Then there would be no more dreams;
For I know I could be so
happy to have it all,
all in its entirety.
I am ill with loneliness,
I wish,
a lot of things, but only good things.
The more, I long for more,
Yet you -- 'cruelty incarnate' have no idea,
what it's like behind this broken hearted door.
All the more, I long for entirely,
all the more, looking out searching
Desiring my troubles, out there
all the more,
calling for me from the farthest most
distant shores.
by: Lowanla (me)
The forceful evening wind brings in the waves;
Disturbing the peace of a calm noonday.
Looking out among the shore;
Only fools crave all the more.
its so gentle, the water feels
warm like love pressing against my waist;
I -- desiring, no,
longing for
the pull of another wave,
happiness is bliss, but only until it fades.
I wish that this ocean tide would
sweep me away into it so quick and violent,
that finally I would be cradled inside at last;
Then there would be no more dreams;
For I know I could be so
happy to have it all,
all in its entirety.
I am ill with loneliness,
I wish,
a lot of things, but only good things.
The more, I long for more,
Yet you -- 'cruelty incarnate' have no idea,
what it's like behind this broken hearted door.
All the more, I long for entirely,
all the more, looking out searching
Desiring my troubles, out there
all the more,
calling for me from the farthest most
distant shores.
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S
I only liked the attention I was getting from you.
I thought you liked me, for no reason...
although I knew there had to be one..
That is why I responded to you.
Thats why it took me so long.
I kept my distance but I still went
along with this because I really didn't understand
what you were doing, and I still don't.
I was never keeping you from finding love.
Or just being happy.
I never tormented you either..
I don't know you, I never did.
The right thing for me was to stay away.
The wrong thing was to chase you
while you rejected and tortured me for no reason,
but I just wanted to be loved, I was
only fooling myself,
even if I had no real worth to you,
i deceived myself.
I wrote you poems, and letters,
because I have always wanted
to fall in love and have a boyfriend,
and I saved all this writing and energy for the person
special enough who I thought deserved it.
The person who affected me and ruined my life that much..
..you don't need my love, nor my stupid poems,
and I don't need to compete with other women
and their poems or love letters.. Because I am
jealous, and ..
I don't deserve this...
I don't understand this,
I don't understand you.
I always wondered why you came around,
and tormented me so much.
You think I'm someone I'm not.
I didn't know why you treated me like this,
I still don't know why you treat me like this.
I don't deserve this...
I never deserved this.
I'm innocent.
I don't know you, and that's the truth.
Thats why for everything.
Im not who you think I am,
nor will I ever be that person you think
deserves this.
I don't.
You treated me like dirt for nothing...
I thought you liked me, for no reason...
although I knew there had to be one..
That is why I responded to you.
Thats why it took me so long.
I kept my distance but I still went
along with this because I really didn't understand
what you were doing, and I still don't.
I was never keeping you from finding love.
Or just being happy.
I never tormented you either..
I don't know you, I never did.
The right thing for me was to stay away.
The wrong thing was to chase you
while you rejected and tortured me for no reason,
but I just wanted to be loved, I was
only fooling myself,
even if I had no real worth to you,
i deceived myself.
I wrote you poems, and letters,
because I have always wanted
to fall in love and have a boyfriend,
and I saved all this writing and energy for the person
special enough who I thought deserved it.
The person who affected me and ruined my life that much..
..you don't need my love, nor my stupid poems,
and I don't need to compete with other women
and their poems or love letters.. Because I am
jealous, and ..
I don't deserve this...
I don't understand this,
I don't understand you.
I always wondered why you came around,
and tormented me so much.
You think I'm someone I'm not.
I didn't know why you treated me like this,
I still don't know why you treat me like this.
I don't deserve this...
I never deserved this.
I'm innocent.
I don't know you, and that's the truth.
Thats why for everything.
Im not who you think I am,
nor will I ever be that person you think
deserves this.
I don't.
You treated me like dirt for nothing...
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S
i should have listened
but I honestly didn't know.
The rumors are true, and I should
have known.
i can't believe you would put me in
that situation...
I never did that to you.
i never had anyone
if I said so, I only made it up.
i don't have a boyfriend.
choose her
and stay the hell away from me.
i don't want you.
I don't love you anymore.
I don't want to be with you in
any form, because you don't love me.
If you did you wouldn't have put me
in this horrible situation.
I don't like
you, I don't want to be like you ever.
This was the worst mistake I could
have ever made.
You are right
you aren't good enough for me,
only the worst most self absorbed woman in the
world, kinda like you, would be perfect.
I will say anything and everything
so that you will leave me alone.
YOU DONT LOVE ME!
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S
Skeletons
by: Lowanla (me)
why did did I have to see this..?
images in my head.
Skeletons under your bed.
This is why I cursed you,
I tried to stop you.
All of you
surrounding the poor unfortunate.
They all wanted to live.
i know they did.
why did I have to see this?
How could you be so evil?
Don't want to be like you.
I would rather die than be a part of you.
i will never forgive you.
it makes me hate you.
their blood cries out.
You laugh and mock now
But God is not mocked
what you sow
you will reap.
God, you can see
you can see
I know you won't let this
evil win.
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S
*fixed an error*
Skeletons
by: Lowanla (me)
why did I have to see this..?
images in my head.
Skeletons under your bed.
This is why I cursed you,
I tried to stop you.
All you and your friends,
surrounding the poor unfortunate.
They all wanted to live.
i know they did.
why did I have to see this?
How could you be so evil?
Don't want to be like you.
I would rather die than be a part of you.
i will never forgive you.
it makes me hate you.
their blood cries out.
You laugh and mock now,
and you feel no guilt
but God is not mocked
what you sow
you will reap.
God, you can see
you can see
I know you won't let this
evil win.
i seen them.
Skeletons in the basement...
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S
Don't Do This
by: Lowanla (me)
Don't do this to me.
Don't make me wish.
My heart hurts.
i'm confused.
Do you really love me? (If only)
or am I another girl being used?
Don't make me cry.
Don't make me lonely.
Don't make me secret.
Don't make me lose.
Don't make me dream.
Don't make me sigh.
Don't make me hate you,
and turn that into a lie.
Don't do those things to me,
because I can't have you.
i can't be with you.
Don't make me love you.
Because when you do,
it hurts so much to be without you,
when I fall in love with you..
I really do.
by: Lowanla (me)
Don't do this to me.
Don't make me wish.
My heart hurts.
i'm confused.
Do you really love me? (If only)
or am I another girl being used?
Don't make me cry.
Don't make me lonely.
Don't make me secret.
Don't make me lose.
Don't make me dream.
Don't make me sigh.
Don't make me hate you,
and turn that into a lie.
Don't do those things to me,
because I can't have you.
i can't be with you.
Don't make me love you.
Because when you do,
it hurts so much to be without you,
when I fall in love with you..
I really do.
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S
It's not my fault,
so don't blame me.
I didn't plan this, I didn't do this,
if I was that strong, I would never let
you get near me.
don't call me names I don't deserve..
I didn't know.
I don't know, and I don't see everything..
only the things I am allowed to see.
don't blame me for things that happen to you.
it has nothing to do with me..
so don't blame me.
I didn't plan this, I didn't do this,
if I was that strong, I would never let
you get near me.
don't call me names I don't deserve..
I didn't know.
I don't know, and I don't see everything..
only the things I am allowed to see.
don't blame me for things that happen to you.
it has nothing to do with me..
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S
Well you obviously hate me anyway for my belief,
and blame me for something out of my control..
so I'll just say this,
if God did this then I am glad,
He's the one who told me to forgive and pray for you,
like I said...I didn't have a choice. I had to forgive.
i told him to give you what you truly deserved..
and you know what that is..
but he didn't.
After what you said to me...after you hurt me...and used me..and broke my heart.
I've decided that I'm moving on with someone else, I don't know who they are yet
but I'm gonna get married,
thats my plan, a bind that will keep you away,
well it has to, God will have to honor that, and protect me from you,
and then I will finally be free.
and blame me for something out of my control..
so I'll just say this,
if God did this then I am glad,
He's the one who told me to forgive and pray for you,
like I said...I didn't have a choice. I had to forgive.
i told him to give you what you truly deserved..
and you know what that is..
but he didn't.
After what you said to me...after you hurt me...and used me..and broke my heart.
I've decided that I'm moving on with someone else, I don't know who they are yet
but I'm gonna get married,
thats my plan, a bind that will keep you away,
well it has to, God will have to honor that, and protect me from you,
and then I will finally be free.
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S
Well, do whatever you want,
it's not my business, and I'm not responsible
for what you do or where you go..
..I don't care anymore.
if you did that to hurt me,
didn't work,
No, let me show you how to hurt me since you are so bent on
hurting me.
Go get married with a girl that you aren't ashamed of,
and plaster it all over the place,
so I can see just how happy you are without me.
then you'll really show me..
that will teach me not to mess with you.
it's not my business, and I'm not responsible
for what you do or where you go..
..I don't care anymore.
if you did that to hurt me,
didn't work,
No, let me show you how to hurt me since you are so bent on
hurting me.
Go get married with a girl that you aren't ashamed of,
and plaster it all over the place,
so I can see just how happy you are without me.
then you'll really show me..
that will teach me not to mess with you.
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S
Your kind of Love
by: Lowanla (me)
your kind of love,
it's only torment,
it's only torture.
its only temporary.
Thats why I push you away.
It's not funny, it's not a joke...
I'll keep letting you know.
the good feeling is only temporary,
It leaves me lonely, angry, bitter, used.
i can't fight for something that leaves me
confused.
your kind of love,
what am I suppose to do with it?
maybe the world is okay with it,
but I'm a bit more traditional
with the one woman one man thing.
Maybe that's my lone dream..
Maybe today is the day
you will realize..
You aren't here.
I'm not there.
i can't hold you,
that drives me crazy,
and now everyone
can see my sin,
and my insanity.
you don't want me there,
you don't want to be over here.
Your kind of love
what am I suppose to do with it?
it doesn't make me feel loved.
you have to know that.
by: Lowanla (me)
your kind of love,
it's only torment,
it's only torture.
its only temporary.
Thats why I push you away.
It's not funny, it's not a joke...
I'll keep letting you know.
the good feeling is only temporary,
It leaves me lonely, angry, bitter, used.
i can't fight for something that leaves me
confused.
your kind of love,
what am I suppose to do with it?
maybe the world is okay with it,
but I'm a bit more traditional
with the one woman one man thing.
Maybe that's my lone dream..
Maybe today is the day
you will realize..
You aren't here.
I'm not there.
i can't hold you,
that drives me crazy,
and now everyone
can see my sin,
and my insanity.
you don't want me there,
you don't want to be over here.
Your kind of love
what am I suppose to do with it?
it doesn't make me feel loved.
you have to know that.
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S
Into The Cloud
by: Lowanla (me)
Shall I jump into the cloud;
The fantasy of love that blinds
my eyes to the cold harsh reality?
Do you now?
Do you, - really
love me?
What if I jump into you,
would you step back
and let me hit the ground hard,
and then would you point your finger
and start to laugh?
I'm afraid to tell you
I love you
I'm afraid to start a new.
I'm afraid, that when I tell you
you'll pull
the rug right from
under me.
Again.
When I tell you I love you,
Will I fall into the cloud,
would you catch me?
When I fall down through
the cloud blindfolded into you.
by: Lowanla (me)
Shall I jump into the cloud;
The fantasy of love that blinds
my eyes to the cold harsh reality?
Do you now?
Do you, - really
love me?
What if I jump into you,
would you step back
and let me hit the ground hard,
and then would you point your finger
and start to laugh?
I'm afraid to tell you
I love you
I'm afraid to start a new.
I'm afraid, that when I tell you
you'll pull
the rug right from
under me.
Again.
When I tell you I love you,
Will I fall into the cloud,
would you catch me?
When I fall down through
the cloud blindfolded into you.
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S
LoveSong Poetry
by: Lowanla (me) For: You
You have a heart that beats for reason.
Then there is that hunger for real love.
You'll take it anywhere you can get it,
even if it's 1 percent of a hundred.
You face judgement,
and broken promises,
control, manipulation, narcissism,
Yet still, you keep coming back for more,
To all you appear perfectly together and rich,
but your broken heart is very poor.
Just sitting near enough,
Just a taste to get you through,
You want to have meaning,
and wonder if anyone ever knew.
You fake a smile
seen for miles,
you wonder many things,
Like, Were you ever really loved without,
or were you ever really seen?
Yes,
through his nail pierced hands did he hold you.
Through his creativity did he dream you.
through his blood drenched eyes,
did he see you.
the past, the present,
the future you.
he seen and still did it all
just for you.
by: Lowanla (me) For: You
You have a heart that beats for reason.
Then there is that hunger for real love.
You'll take it anywhere you can get it,
even if it's 1 percent of a hundred.
You face judgement,
and broken promises,
control, manipulation, narcissism,
Yet still, you keep coming back for more,
To all you appear perfectly together and rich,
but your broken heart is very poor.
Just sitting near enough,
Just a taste to get you through,
You want to have meaning,
and wonder if anyone ever knew.
You fake a smile
seen for miles,
you wonder many things,
Like, Were you ever really loved without,
or were you ever really seen?
Yes,
through his nail pierced hands did he hold you.
Through his creativity did he dream you.
through his blood drenched eyes,
did he see you.
the past, the present,
the future you.
he seen and still did it all
just for you.
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