Marriage

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Sep 1, 2020
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#1
Needing Prayers and/or advice

To help me find the answers when it comes to my relationship with my husband, I love him so dearly and he loves me just as much or more, he has never hurt me or done anything wrong, he is a youth leader and a good spiritual man but whenever I pray and try to have a heart to heart with God I feel like he is telling me I need to leave my husband.. I don't know why! But this has been going on for a few years now and we have two children together.. Not a single part of me wants to leave but I feel like God won't talk to me anymore unless it's to say I need to leave my husband.. I don't know what to do because I feel like I can't become close to God because I'm not listening to him. But I don't know why I need to leave my husband. Please pray for a clear vision and answers to this. Thanks
 

Godsgirl83

Well-known member
Apr 1, 2019
6,172
4,245
113
#2
Welcome to CC.
After reading your post it occurred to me that you may want to try posting this in a forum that will get more attention, thus more replies, such as in the Family Forum.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
33,776
11,496
113
66
Tennessee
#3
Needing Prayers and/or advice

To help me find the answers when it comes to my relationship with my husband, I love him so dearly and he loves me just as much or more, he has never hurt me or done anything wrong, he is a youth leader and a good spiritual man but whenever I pray and try to have a heart to heart with God I feel like he is telling me I need to leave my husband.. I don't know why! But this has been going on for a few years now and we have two children together.. Not a single part of me wants to leave but I feel like God won't talk to me anymore unless it's to say I need to leave my husband.. I don't know what to do because I feel like I can't become close to God because I'm not listening to him. But I don't know why I need to leave my husband. Please pray for a clear vision and answers to this. Thanks
It is certainly not God telling you to leave your husband because God says that what He has joined together let no one put asunder. You don't need to leave your husband, and based on your post you have no desire to do so. On this matter you are obviously not listening to God but are just responding to your own thoughts, thoughts that were put in there by someone or something that is not of God.

I will say a prayer for God to give you clarity of thought. Continue to love your husband as you have from the start. It appears that the devil is trying to drive a wedge in between you and your husband.

Hopefully, you will find comfort, support, and understanding from the members of this site. Glad to have you as part our community. Welcome to CC.
 
Sep 1, 2020
11
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#4
Thank you, I can’t understand why God would be telling me this but it is literally the words that come up every time I try to pray. I’ve asked for clarity and I’ve told Satan to go away but it is always there. Exactly what you said, God doesn’t want divorce and I know he put us together. I’m just lost because I feel like I’ve told Satan off already so I can’t figure out what it could be..
maybe I’m listening to lies, this world has a bigger influence on me than I think.
With all the failing marriages it is scary and maybe it’s getting stronger that I’m feeling like this because I Feel like I have a closer relationship with God.. even though I feel like he’s telling me to leave.
Sorry for the mumble jumble of words. I feel like I just got some clarity writing this and having someone else’s opinion.. Satan is trying to get to me by blocking my relationship with God.. therefore making me think this is God talking to me and because he’s a sneaky serpent I’m falling for his lies.
Again thank you for responding!
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
33,776
11,496
113
66
Tennessee
#5
Thank you, I can’t understand why God would be telling me this but it is literally the words that come up every time I try to pray. I’ve asked for clarity and I’ve told Satan to go away but it is always there. Exactly what you said, God doesn’t want divorce and I know he put us together. I’m just lost because I feel like I’ve told Satan off already so I can’t figure out what it could be..
maybe I’m listening to lies, this world has a bigger influence on me than I think.
With all the failing marriages it is scary and maybe it’s getting stronger that I’m feeling like this because I Feel like I have a closer relationship with God.. even though I feel like he’s telling me to leave.
Sorry for the mumble jumble of words. I feel like I just got some clarity writing this and having someone else’s opinion.. Satan is trying to get to me by blocking my relationship with God.. therefore making me think this is God talking to me and because he’s a sneaky serpent I’m falling for his lies.
Again thank you for responding!
I find for myself that my thoughts are more clearly articulated in my writing as I am not really verbally eloquent. Your post was not a mumble jumble of words at all but a clear expression of what you have been going through.

You are correct as it is Satan that is telling you to leave your husband. I will pray for God to place a hedge of protection around your marriage. You have also stated correctly that the world, if we are not careful and diligent, can have a detrimental influence on how we think, what we believe, and the way that we act. God has called us out of the world in a spiritual sense.

Regarding telling Satan off, I have asked Jesus to do that for you because He has more experience in such matters.

God bless you and those that you love.
 
L

lenna

Guest
#8
Needing Prayers and/or advice

To help me find the answers when it comes to my relationship with my husband, I love him so dearly and he loves me just as much or more, he has never hurt me or done anything wrong, he is a youth leader and a good spiritual man but whenever I pray and try to have a heart to heart with God I feel like he is telling me I need to leave my husband.. I don't know why! But this has been going on for a few years now and we have two children together.. Not a single part of me wants to leave but I feel like God won't talk to me anymore unless it's to say I need to leave my husband.. I don't know what to do because I feel like I can't become close to God because I'm not listening to him. But I don't know why I need to leave my husband. Please pray for a clear vision and answers to this. Thanks

have you expressed the above to your husband? I'm going to guess no, but maybe you should

tell him what is going on, tell him you have no desire to divorce him and that you love him very much and ask him to pray with you and get rid of that lying spirit whispering in your ear

the devil works in the darkness. bring the situation into the light, involve your husband and pray together for your marriage

that voice is absolutely not God!
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
33,776
11,496
113
66
Tennessee
#10
Did the OP come back yet? I have a comment, but it's crazy. I want to see what she says first.
If there is a little green dot by the avatar that means that the member is logged in. Currently, no green dot.
 

Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
1,264
1,152
113
#11
It is certainly not God telling you to leave your husband because God says that what He has joined together let no one put asunder. You don't need to leave your husband, and based on your post you have no desire to do so. On this matter you are obviously not listening to God but are just responding to your own thoughts, thoughts that were put in there by someone or something that is not of God.

I will say a prayer for God to give you clarity of thought. Continue to love your husband as you have from the start. It appears that the devil is trying to drive a wedge in between you and your husband.

Hopefully, you will find comfort, support, and understanding from the members of this site. Glad to have you as part our community. Welcome to CC.
Most definitely
 
Jul 20, 2019
1,228
874
113
#12
It is certainly not God telling you to leave your husband because God says that what He has joined together let no one put asunder. You don't need to leave your husband, and based on your post you have no desire to do so. On this matter you are obviously not listening to God but are just responding to your own thoughts, thoughts that were put in there by someone or something that is not of God.

I will say a prayer for God to give you clarity of thought. Continue to love your husband as you have from the start. It appears that the devil is trying to drive a wedge in between you and your husband.

Hopefully, you will find comfort, support, and understanding from the members of this site. Glad to have you as part our community. Welcome to CC.
very very important to note those words What HE has put together, not what man has put together. Many relationships these days are based on pragmatism or he/she ticks all the boxes IE six figure salary, a career, he is handsome, drives a Porsche 911, makes me laugh etc. Not a godly marriage. Things are never as they appear to be, scripture needs to be read and prayed on. Keep in mind God isn't a hypocrite.
 
L

lenna

Guest
#13
very very important to note those words What HE has put together, not what man has put together. Many relationships these days are based on pragmatism or he/she ticks all the boxes IE six figure salary, a career, he is handsome, drives a Porsche 911, makes me laugh etc. Not a godly marriage. Things are never as they appear to be, scripture needs to be read and prayed on. Keep in mind God isn't a hypocrite.
that is not the list of a Christian man or woman and certainly not anything the op is talking about

you sound jaded

when 2 Christians make vows to each other and keep them, God is not in the business of destroying it

people get the idea that because certain people in the Bible had a hand picked person just waiting for them, that is the norm. that is not necessarily so

Paul also states to remain in the state in which you were converted and that even includes unbelievers unless they refuse to stay with you
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
33,776
11,496
113
66
Tennessee
#14
very very important to note those words What HE has put together, not what man has put together. Many relationships these days are based on pragmatism or he/she ticks all the boxes IE six figure salary, a career, he is handsome, drives a Porsche 911, makes me laugh etc. Not a godly marriage. Things are never as they appear to be, scripture needs to be read and prayed on. Keep in mind God isn't a hypocrite.
In our marriage we make it a point to set aside time each day for prayer, devotion, bible study, and reading the bible. I firmly believe that the family that prays together stays together.

Your estimation on what many relationships are based on is right on target. Any marriage that is based on secular world values will, if not outright fail, be a miserable experience and one that would be regretted. I know this from experience from my horrible first marriage in the days of my youth. I learned the hard way and paid a heavy price.
 

DiscipleA

Active member
Apr 17, 2020
156
39
28
Northeast Pennsylvania USA
#15
Ok I'll just post part of my comment so it doesn't sound so so crazy. Keep in mind I'm probably not all that serious about it either. Let's say by some crazy chance that is God. Then, how can that be???????

THERE'S A LOOPHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 Corinthians 7:10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

She can discuss it with her husband and separate with no hard feelings since God asked them to. Then perhaps God will reveal the reason for it. Then they can just reconcile like it never even happened!

Isn't it interesting that just as Moses permitted divorce....does God now leave leeway here for certain people he specifically tells to do it when he says "but if she does [divorce]"???

I know. Crazy idea. Maybe we can figure out what that voice was or whatever somehow. What would it benefit Satan since they can get back together anyway? It would sure take a leap of faith. It would be interesting to see if something happens in between. She's not gonna do it anyway. If she did the first step would be to find out about the source of that voice.
 
Sep 1, 2020
11
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#16
Wow thank you for all the replies.
Sorry I am a full time mom and this is a busy season for me.
I figured I could lump this all into one reply...
I have ZERO desire to leave my husband. But maybe if I gave some background that would help.
when we first started dating 6 years ago he had told me had a pornography addiction.. to which we had a long night discussing this and he, to my knowledge has stopped this. Since then he has battled with said addiction but he did do well. However with my second pregnancy I had no sexual dire (makes sense being 6+ months pregnant, and sorry tmi) and I noticed we had drawn apart from each other emotionally, we still loved each other and everything else stayed the same.
Well 3 months after our second child is born and I felt something fishy was happening, so while he wasn’t around I went through the history on his phone.. sure enough I found pictures of women.
Now I know to some pornography is not an issue or a “big deal”, but to me it is.
I confronted him right aways and we had a long talk. I found out that he had been struggling with this addiction badly and he hated it but couldn’t tell me because he was afraid of hurting me.
I can always tell when he is lying or something is going on and I know he meant every word that night, that he was stopping and he told Satan that he no longer had a grip on him. We prayed and cried a lot.
I bought him the book “every mans battle” and he read it in a week, he has been since then so devoted to keeping pure that it made our relationship do a 360’.
He even did a message in church about his conviction.
Me and God have been really close, like I’ve always felt super close to Him. I don’t even know when it started that I felt I should leave my husband. It was kind of like it clicked and that’s the only voice I’ve heard. Now whenever I am challenged to pray and ask God what a certain message was telling me I just kept hearing the voice “I need you to leave him”. I cry in emotional love because I love God so dearly and I sing his words everyday. But whenever I feel like I’m trying to have a heart to heart with Him I get that little voice again. I’ve told Satan to go away, that he has no place in our marriage. God only. But still I hear that voice.

I think a part of it is that my husband cheating on me has Always been a huge fear of mine since I was young. And now I feel like I will never leave it, even though my husband is amazing and he tries everyday, I sometimes feel like it’s not enough, but what is enough then? No ones perfect, I know I’m not. But how can I get that voice out of my head?
Is it my trust in my husband? Is it my confidence in myself? Or in my relationship with hubby? Or is Satan so desperate to “win” that he will take every opportunity that I have a heart to heart with God, just so I can get distracted with that voice. But how can I tell him off when I already have? Can everyone reading this send a quick prayer for me?
I have two boys with him and I love them all so much. I love my husband so much. But I feel like it’s a tug of war between loving my husband and feeling the need to obey the voice (either God or Satan).
Thanks for reading if you’ve made it this far.
 
Sep 1, 2020
11
4
3
#17
have you expressed the above to your husband? I'm going to guess no, but maybe you should

tell him what is going on, tell him you have no desire to divorce him and that you love him very much and ask him to pray with you and get rid of that lying spirit whispering in your ear

the devil works in the darkness. bring the situation into the light, involve your husband and pray together for your marriage

that voice is absolutely not God!
I have actually, but he is afraid of loosing me and is very sensitive to that(who wouldn’t be?) so I told it very lightly once, and then never spoke of it again
 
Sep 1, 2020
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#18
To add:
We do a devotional and have quiet time where we talk about our day and always end in prayer...
 

pickles

Senior Member
Apr 20, 2009
14,465
169
63
#19
After 39 yrs of marriage and still going...
The best advise I ever heard I will give to you.

Love your husband as called to in the scriptures, and trust you husband in Jesus to God Our Father.
For we do not change our husbands, God Our Father perfects them. :)
I found this to be the wisest and most effective.
You, your husband and children are in my prayers in Jesus.:)

hugs and God bless
pickles
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
9,986
3,627
113
#20
um what?!

It could be a test but what a dilemma, stay and be married to someone whos addicted to pornogaphy, or leave and not be married.

well I know what I would choose if I was in that situation.
Because isnt pornography ADULTERY. Its a HUGE deal! someone joined to a harlot cant be joined to a bride.

1 Corinthians 6:15-20

whats disturbing is that your so called husband is a youth leader. Is that right? Now whoever he is leading is NOT going to be on the right path if hes addicted to pornography. I would be very concerned for whoever is in his charge. ESpecially if they are children.

I am going to be blunt. Your so called husband is not being faithful to you.