Modesty

So the other day on Facebook, my dad shared the following post:

"HEY! You "Christian" girls showing off your half naked bodies, way more than necessary, and getting MEN commenting and liking and oogling over you...STOP!!!!! Frankly it's embarrassing!!!! I am not about to excuse it and tell people it's OK. God says it's NOT OK!!!!! Those kind of seductive pics should be between you and your husband. Good grief!!"

Here were two responses that stuck out to me:

"i get so tired of seeing women showing their bodies off with skimpy shorts and cleavage they think its ok! however its not! Joyce Meyer said something really insightful that if u see yourself in the mirror and u feel you look sexy (causing men to lust) u need to change your clothes."

what if a woman just has loads of confidence and thinks she's sexy even while wearing something completely tasteful and conservative? Is considering oneself 'sexy' a bad thing? Also, I feel like a man could lust after a woman regardless of how covered or uncovered she is (and a woman after a man, as well).

"Oh and even then ick! What kind of man wants to see that?"

Well...I'd hope that a married man wouldn't be disgusted at the sight of his wife's nakedness.

Thoughts and opionions

My thought is, given the other threads I've seen on this issue, it will be an argumentative blame fest.
'Women shouldn't dress like that, it's their fault'.
'Men shouldn't be such pigs and learn to control themselves, they are to blame'.
That's the typical way this topic has gone here.

My Facebook profile picture usually is the same one I have on here. My profile is private. It's posted publicly that I'm married. 2 pictures before this one, I had a photo up of me and my Daughter. She's 9, I'm wearing a sweater, glasses and I'm smiling and hugging her. Nothing inappropriate about the photo at all. The time I had that photo up about two months I had about 6 friend requests from men I don't know. I asked on Facebook opinions of others on why that would be happening? It says I'm married, I'm also with my kid. How many men are attracted to middle aged married Mom's? I thought it was some kind of new scam, trying to get private info about people.

So a long time male friend responds, well a guy sees an attractive woman, he's going to try. I said, Whoa, it says I'm married, happily married. Other friends female chime in and say, that's happened to me too. These were my married female friends, not my single female friends.

I decide, I'm going to change the picture of one of my Husband and I. Ok, no friend requests from male strangers. Okay good. So recently I purchased an I phone. I was messing around with the camera, I took the picture that I have posted now. My avatar here is also my photo on Facebook. There's nothing inappropriate about this photo either. The friend request's are coming again from men I don't know.

I don't dress very sexy. My shirt's are mainly regular t shirt's. Not tight, normal fitting. I dress modestly, almost lazy like when I'm home. When I'm out, I dress modestly, unless the occasion requires more formal attire. I have one black maxi dress, I usually wear a black sweater or Jean jacket over it. If I think, I look nice, I'm not going to be ashamed of feeling that way. I think modesty is important. My question is though, I'm posting very innocent photos. I know the racy photos that they're talking about. But when I'm just showing my face smiling, and I have men lurking at that photo. Every other photo is private, only for family and close friends to see. Am I supposed to cover my face with a scarf?

You need a burka. Here:

Oh Magenta! What a wonderful idea! Lol

Please forgive my oversight. It also even comes in black, if you prefer.



However, who could resist such a finely dressed woman? It may not solve your problem

I did notice that. I could be a modest rainbow. I bet I could take a picture of myself in a purple Burka while wearing the Groucho Marx nose, glasses, mustache and eyebrows, put a fedora on my head and still get friend request from strange men on Facebook. I think some men are into some freaky stuff.

I feel sorry for those women, I really do.

So do I. It is barbaric how some countries treat women.

Jennifer! I hardly recognized you in those snazzy new sunglasses!

1. Sexy does not have to mean you have to run and change your clothes. That's ridiculous lol. Let's not confuse girls showing off too much with just being attractive and catching someone's eye(even if it's your own). And if we're talking about lust, some guys/girls are definitely gonna do that no matter what you wear. That's on them. If you can dress appropriately and still look good, then you do you.

2. What kind of man wouldn't? Isn't that part of the issue? Just saying.

I found this program quite interesting when it first aired on the CBC.
Summer Series: Strange Bedfellows - Advertising & Porn
Summer Series: Strange Bedfellows - Advertising & Porn - Home | Under The Influence with Terry O'Reilly | CBC Radio
* * * * * *
In the USA:
64% of American men view porn at least monthly, and the %
of Christian men is nearly the same as the culture at large
79% of men ages 18-30 view porn at least monthly.
67% of men ages 31-49 view porn at least monthly.
55% of married men view porn at least monthly.
(Digital Journal, August 14, 2014)

In the UK:
70% of UK teens say porn is seen as normal by their peers at school.
46% of teens said sexting is a part of everyday life for teenagers.
2/3 of girls and nearly 50% of boys said growing up would be easier if porn was harder to access.
(DailyMail, UK, August 19, 2014)
75% of Christian men view porn at least monthly.
41% of Christian men admit to being addicted to pornography.
30% of church leaders view porn regularly
(The Way, UK, January 20, 2015)

In Ireland:
83% of men and 56% of women have viewed porn.
25% of these watch it weekly.
36% who are not in a relationship view porn weekly.
(Irish News, January 17, 2015)

In Australia:
70% of Australian men view porn online (according to research from
University of Sydney, but other surveys show the number as high as 90%).
80% of 15 to 17 year olds have had multiple exposures to hard core porn.
(Newcastle Herald, September 12, 2014)

In South Africa:
67% of men view porn several times a week
(New24.com, South Africa, March 19, 2015)

In Trinidad:
79% of men watch porn
52% of women watch porn
Trinidad has one of the highest per capita rate of searches for porn on Google
(Trinidad Express, October 18, 2014)

http://sexual-sanity.com/2015/08/some-recent-statistics-about-internet-pornography/

Yep, pretty much this.

I was afraid they might be to flashy, but I think they look okay.

I kinda think the burka argument is a bit much. Being supportive of modesty is not equal to forcing an entire group of people to cover themselves head to toe in a large sheet.

I definitely support modesty, I do not believe its fair to claim Im some controlling monster for feeling that way : p

Just once. Just once, I would like this topic instead --
[/QUOTE]"HEY! You "Christian" boys showing off your half naked bodies, way more than necessary, and getting WOMEN commenting and liking and oogling over you...STOP!!!!! Frankly it's embarrassing!!!! I am not about to excuse it and tell people it's OK. God says it's NOT OK!!!!! Those kind of seductive pics should be between you and your wife. Good grief!!"[/QUOTE]

This is very disturbing to see laid out in black and white. (light and dark purple) I'd venture to say the stats are even higher since people don't report things that they keep secret. Only Jesus can change the human heart.

Seeing how many possible Christians are involved it shows that outward conformity to morality and religion can't do it nor can human will power. It takes the Holy Spirit working in the believers life.

Something that stands out in my mind is the more people watch this stuff, the more there is and will be a market for it and the more the innocent and weak in the world will be used and abused. From what you see from history, humans have always been this way but now with up dated inventions it's become world wide access.

It's not a male problem., it's a human problem. No one is an island unto themselves and what we each do has an effect on society at large. I'm so thankful Jesus is the answer to all these issues!!

"HEY! You "Christian" boys showing off your half naked bodies, way more than necessary, and getting WOMEN commenting and liking and oogling over you...STOP!!!!! Frankly it's embarrassing!!!! I am not about to excuse it and tell people it's OK. God says it's NOT OK!!!!! Those kind of seductive pics should be between you and your wife. Good grief!!"[/QUOTE][/QUOTE]


I agree with you Lynn. When I'm at the beach or in public swimming and I see people walking around in swim wear it can be kind of gross. A lot of people don't wear appropriate fitting swim suits. I always buy a two piece for myself. I don't mean a bikini, I buy a tankini. It's a swim suit tank top and shorts or a swim skirt. I have never owned a bikini, even when I was a size 5. They just aren't me. People are very brave when they wear swim stuff in public. I see a lot of hairy men. I know they can't help it, but if a woman walked around with her gut hanging out and hair all over people would gawk. My Husband and son wear those swim shirts. Not because they are super modest but we are the most pale people on this planet and we burn, so we cover up. I'm not offended by nudity or men without shirts, but I do wish more men would wear swim shirts. It's a gross factor for me. I don't know why and I don't stare. I also wish more women would wear swim suits that fit them properly. They would look so much better. I have a friend that isn't fat or skinny, she's an average weight, but her clothes are so tight. My Husband has asked why she wears her clothing so tight? I don't know and I've never asked, but it looks so uncomfortable and I think she'd look really nice in clothing that fits her properly.