Don't know what to do, 25 years of marriage on the verge of divorce

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Mybrokenheart

Junior Member
Jan 29, 2018
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#1
I have been married 25 years. My husband is not a Christian. He has a gambling problem. We are in the midst of counceling but I don't know that I want to be married to him anymore. He is not happy, I am not happy. I don't know what to do. He spends a lot of time on his phone, he has a female best friend and he works with her. I do not like the fact that he has a female friend. I do not think it is right for him to do that. He has recently started drinking beer too. This is my first time doing anything like this. WE have two sons, they are grown young men.
 
Oct 25, 2017
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#2
Hi! Sis :) Welcome to CC :)





I don't know much about marriage I just want to share with you the story of my parents...My father was a drunkard...growing up with a drunkard father was hard...There were regular fightings,shouting and flying dishes inside our house...I don't understand much about how painful it was for my mother but i knew it was hard for me to witness a home like we had...I saw my mother countless times sobbing and crying but she still lovingly care for my father...But there was One time she packed her things but after a couple of weeks she decided to come back but things continued until I was in highschool...
My mother sticked with my father like there was no other man on earth..she showed patience,love and understanding that made my father realized and changed his ways...When my father changed my mother became more happier and our home became more peaceful...


They didnt start as a perfect couple...almost more than half of that 44 years was very tough for my mother but she didnt give up... :)






Looking back now...I really appreciate how my mother showed love and sacrifice just to make sure our family will not break up...she stood by my father no matter what...even during those days that she got all the reasons to walk away for good...but she stayed. They are together for 44 years now...loving each other and caring for each other even more.




I know your story is different from my parents but I believe that you made the same vow that in good times and in bad you both will continue to cherish each other as long as you live...and will not give up...




God bless you and your family ❤ I'll be praying for you sis ❤
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#3
Welcome here you can discuss with bible smart people and possibly make new friends,hope you like it here!
 

jameen

Senior Member
Feb 5, 2018
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Manila
#4
I have been married 25 years. My husband is not a Christian. He has a gambling problem. We are in the midst of counceling but I don't know that I want to be married to him anymore. He is not happy, I am not happy. I don't know what to do. He spends a lot of time on his phone, he has a female best friend and he works with her. I do not like the fact that he has a female friend. I do not think it is right for him to do that. He has recently started drinking beer too. This is my first time doing anything like this. WE have two sons, they are grown young men.
If your husband drinks too much beer and acts nasty, then it is up to you if you will separate from him or accept that flaw.

about his female best friend, do not be too suspicious. investigate well if they are having secret relationship and if yes, then this is the good reason to separate from him.

but while on this agony, I advise you to pray for his good change and pray that your sorrows of your heart be gone.

Only prayers where you can find peace of mind and hope.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
63,470
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#5
Welcome to CC. :) This forum is only for introducing yourself. Your OP is more fitting for the Family forum, where the rest of the threads on this subject are..
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#6
There are others in similar situations here so please know that you're not alone. Hopefully, you will find comfort, support and understanding from the members of this site. Glad to have you join us. Welcome to CC.
 
Sep 11, 2017
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#7
Hi mybrokenheart, you'll get more support in Family forum :) Welcome to CC, dear :)
 

Calmer43

Junior Member
Feb 6, 2018
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#8
Acts 16:31 He is God's already on the fact that you are saved. Pray it believe it. I speak restoration into your situation. Calmness into the chaos. Your marriage current situation is not its final destination.
 

forgivened1

Junior Member
May 1, 2017
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#9
I have been married 25 years. My husband is not a Christian. He has a gambling problem. We are in the midst of counceling but I don't know that I want to be married to him anymore. He is not happy, I am not happy. I don't know what to do. He spends a lot of time on his phone, he has a female best friend and he works with her. I do not like the fact that he has a female friend. I do not think it is right for him to do that. He has recently started drinking beer too. This is my first time doing anything like this. WE have two sons, they are grown young men.

I really hate to hear this, my marriage ended in divorce just before our 20 year anniversary- at the time I didn't realize the issue was an addiction problem. As far as I was concerned he was lost in adultery and wasn't willing to change. That divorce about killed me- it was worse than a death as far as lost family etc went. Anyway, BEFORE you seek a divorce- try to become friends again- have you dated? do you have common interest-that you can share? continue with the counseling and learn to seek happiness apart from your spouse- I've learned my joy comes from the Lord not anything or anyone here on earth- yes I find joy in my grand-kids etc but I do not rely on my spouse or anyone else to make me happy (if that makes sense).
You say he isn't a Christian- are you? If you are have you been praying and seeking God and what His will is?
I recently heard a message by Patricia Ashley on marriage- oh man- she has marriage down for sure -I laughed so much and realized she was so right in many areas and that I could adopt some of those things into my marriage now. Oh btw I am now remarried (going on 8 years- not any easier the second time around- in fact it is downright HARDER but each day I seek to grow closer to Christ and guard my heart.
I will pray for you both- for his addictions (sickness) and that God will lead you to do His will for His greater purpose.
 
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