Single, curious, new

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Jaymunoz

New member
May 30, 2018
10
13
3
#1
Hey everyone, I’m new to this as well as newly single. It’s been an interesting journey learning myself all over again. I didn’t realize how much of myself I gave to the other person. Now I am feeling alone, which isn’t always a bad thing. How are you guys keeping yourself in a positive mindset during this time of teaching yourself to be content alone?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#4
Basically you live life, pursue your interests, hold down a job, see what happens today and prepare for what you think will be most likely to occur tomorrow.

Also never mistake boredom for loneliness. You can be very bored and think you are lonely, and get really depressed about how lonely you are... when all you really are is bored.

Mind you, not all loneliness is really boredom. There is a real loneliness. But boredom is often mistaken for loneliness, when all it really is is boredom.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#5
Also don't watch too much TV and movies. If you default to videos at the drop of a boredom hat, you will wake up one day 20 years from now and wonder why in the world you haven't been doing more with your life. Boredom means you should be learning the piano, or taking a nap, or riding a bike in the park, or getting a cat or dog, or... either DOING something or resting.

Watching a TV show that is interesting is good. Watching TV all the time because you are bored is bad.
 

Jaymunoz

New member
May 30, 2018
10
13
3
#6
Also don't watch too much TV and movies. If you default to videos at the drop of a boredom hat, you will wake up one day 20 years from now and wonder why in the world you haven't been doing more with your life. Boredom means you should be learning the piano, or taking a nap, or riding a bike in the park, or getting a cat or dog, or... either DOING something or resting.

Watching a TV show that is interesting is good. Watching TV all the time because you are bored is bad.
I’ve been doing really well with keeping myself busy, gardening, hanging out in nature, yoga etc. I am making a point to stay off the social media and tv. Those things tend to beautify what we should expect out of being with another person, or even just magnify for some people their struggles. You’re right! I’m also trying to be involved with groups at church, to meet new people!
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
55,247
25,713
113
#7
You are welcome, Jaymunoz :) You have joined us a a good time: we underwent a platform change a couple of days ago, so the site is as new to most here ;) There is lots to explore and many ways to share of yourself, your interests, and your love of God and His eternal living Word.
 

Jaymunoz

New member
May 30, 2018
10
13
3
#8
You are welcome, Jaymunoz :) You have joined us a a good time: we underwent a platform change a couple of days ago, so the site is as new to most here ;) There is lots to explore and many ways to share of yourself, your interests, and your love of God and His eternal living Word.
I am so excited to see who I meet, be inspired by others and explore!
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#9
One thing that really helps with being single is whatever it is you are really enthusiastic about. If you haven't found that thing yet, now is a great time to start exploring the world of really neat things that you can put your life into. "Something I am enthusiastic about" is SO much better than "something I am doing to take up time so I won't be bored."

For me, for example, it is music. I can talk about music for days straight (so take that as a warning, don't start talking about music around me or you will be bored to tears.) I have an 88-key semiweighted keyboard connected to my computer, and in the computer I can make soundtracks. I use the soundtracks for singing songs at church without adding more to our already-overloaded piano player's plate. I also have more than 2,000 tracks from old records that I have recorded off, edited and saved in digital form.

Free time? What is that? There's always more stuff I want to do. This is something I am enthusiastic about, something I really like and I think it's really neat and it is useful for singing songs at church... and all the music I have in my collection is useful for playing at work. All my music is christian, but I can find a style in my collection to fit any coworker's taste.

What are you enthusiastic about? Architecture? Playing an instrument? Biking? Pottery? Now is a great time to buy that electric pottery wheel or those upgraded bicycle shifters, while your money is YOUR money.

Can't think of anything you're enthusiastic about? Great! There's a really big world full of stuff to explore. And now that you're single, this is a great time to be trying stuff out.
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,415
2,659
113
#10
Welcome to CC!

What are your hobbies?

CC is a great way to interact with others. We have people from all over the world with different backgrounds and life experiences. Keep posting. :)
 

Jaymunoz

New member
May 30, 2018
10
13
3
#11
Welcome to CC!

What are your hobbies?

CC is a great way to interact with others. We have people from all over the world with different backgrounds and life experiences. Keep posting. :)
Hey!! My hobbies include being outside, gardening, frizby golf, hula hooping, I love to cook and I am very into herbs and their medicinal purposes. I enjoyed reading and meeting new people. I’m excited to be on here with all of you and can’t wait to start learning and exploring!
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,894
113
#14
Welcome to CC dear sister in Christ :)

See you around the forums.

Blessings ❤️
 

vashweb2

Well-known member
May 30, 2018
91
303
53
#16
Please understand the mission of Christian Chat is to find out the secret of Chinese food.:cool:(y)
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,574
4,262
113
#17
Hey everyone, I’m new to this as well as newly single. It’s been an interesting journey learning myself all over again. I didn’t realize how much of myself I gave to the other person. Now I am feeling alone, which isn’t always a bad thing. How are you guys keeping yourself in a positive mindset during this time of teaching yourself to be content alone?
I just think about all the drama and problems that a relationship can bring... and the married men I've known who told me I was smart for not getting married... then I feel glad again. :cool:

 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
837
113
#19
I'm not single, but I think what helped me stay content in the single days was staying busy and reflective. Read, write, and live.
 

vashweb2

Well-known member
May 30, 2018
91
303
53
#20
I believe Chinese food is more important than all that. Plus it tastes good:giggle: