A conversation about nothing in particular

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kodiak

Senior Member
Mar 8, 2015
4,995
290
83
I need some advice..

OK, so the other day I put a brand new pair of sneakers outside for free for someone to take. Denise brought them inside her house and tried to sell them, which really ticks me off because I intended for them to be left out free so someone could have a FREE pair of shoes. Anyhoo, her yard sale stuff is out in our hallway and I saw my sneakers so I pulled them out and brought them in here. I intend on taking them to the soup kitchen and put them on the free table there. She has a price list on all her stuff and wants $30 for them.

Bear in mind that Denise is very money-greedy and I am not. She NEVER puts anything out free, and I'm ALWAYS putting stuff out free. Problem is SHE grabs it all for herself. :rolleyes: She's a hoarder, that's why.

ANYHOO my dilemma is this: I want my shoes to be free to someone, and not sold. Since they ARE technically still mine, is it right for me to do what I said I want to do and put them out free? On the other hand I don't want her thinking that I went through her stuff, which I didn't, because my shoes were on top..

So do I keep the shoes and put them on the free table, or put them back in her stuff and let her either sell them or ask her if it's okay if I put them back out free?

Either way she won't be happy but she KNEW I wanted them left out free for someone (NOT HER) to take. She wants $30 for them and I paid only like $20 when I first bought them.. lol
BLB, I am not trying to be argumentative here, just curious. How do you come to the conclusion that they are technically still yours? She may try telling you that you just put them out there for free, so she followed the rules by taking them for free and now they are hers to do with as he pleases. Not saying this is right or wrong, but that may be what ends up being said.

You may want to just ask her and tell her your intentions, before it turns into a fight.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
BLB, I am not trying to be argumentative here, just curious. How do you come to the conclusion that they are technically still yours? She may try telling you that you just put them out there for free, so she followed the rules by taking them for free and now they are hers to do with as he pleases. Not saying this is right or wrong, but that may be what ends up being said.

You may want to just ask her and tell her your intentions, before it turns into a fight.

Because I TOLD her that I wanted them left out free for someone who needed a pair of shoes to take. Because of her money motivation to grab anything free and try to sell it, she brought them in and added them to her yard sale, knowing that I wanted them to stay out free. If she took them for herself and intended to wear them, I wouldn't mind.

But she did it sneakily with the thought of "maybe I can sell these behind Blue's back"..

I did not give them to her, I didn't say she could have them, and I didn't sell them to her. So they ARE still mine. She can't even sell her own shoes, so how does she expect to sell mine?

Money in her pocket vs. someone getting a free pair of shoes. I'd choose giving someone a free pair of shoes.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,580
4,268
113
Here is a legal definition of theft:


5-36-103. Theft of property.

(a) A person commits theft of property if he or she knowingly:

(1) Takes or exercises unauthorized control over or makes an unauthorized transfer of an interest in the property of another person with the purpose of depriving the owner of the property; or

(2) Obtains the property of another person by deception or by threat with the purpose of depriving the owner of the property.


In Blue's case.... the transfer of the interest in the property was illegal because it was not an authorized (accepted) transfer by the owner. In other words, Blue put the shoes out there with the sole purpose of helping a person in need of shoes (no pun intended).... The fact that it was free is not relevant. That just means the price tag is $0 dollars...

So when someone takes the shoes for a different purpose that was not authorized by the seller/owner, especially with the purpose of depriving the owner of their original intent (to help someone), or deprive them of the proceeds from the sale of their shoes, it is theft by definition of the law.
 

slave

Senior Member
Mar 20, 2015
6,307
1,097
113
So, Blue we have a predicament with Denise I see. You have not talked directly to her about what you feel based on what she has done? If not this is my first suggestion. To read her mind is impossible and you know that for you know the Bible that tells you that only God can read the hearts and minds of mankind. To speculate is not to yearn for her friendship at any cost. What would Christ Jesus do here? Give her what Christ would have for her to receive from you. You are not your own now you have been bought with a price. Give her the wealth of God's purposes and intentions over your own. This is also my suggestion.

Money may be her motivation - so what! I would then give her some of mine, even though I need it too, as a gift to gain her as a friend, offering it to God as a living sacrifice for His purposes and intentions over my own. God, I would trust, would have my back on my financial needs then as well. I would love on her God's way in other words - not in human reasoning ways. This is absurd to the world in what I mention - but I pray it is not absurd to you being in Christ. I trust I can give you this in love and you will receive it well.

“When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up I put away childish things,” (2 Corinthians 13:11). One of the “things” includes a selfish attitude. As we grow and mature we realize that everything is not ours and, as a matter of fact, it is all God’s. According to (Psalms 24:1), God owns everything. All the land, all the water, all the buildings, all the cars, all the houses, all the “everything” belongs to God. And He wants us to take care of it all.

Stewardship is taking care of something one does not own. From teaching toddlers to pick up toys to involving preteens in mission projects, we train our children that it’s all God’s and He has given us the privilege to take care of it for Him. Teaching and training children to be responsible stewards begins in the nursery and continues throughout our lives.

As you yield to Christ's vision - this will be an opportunity to be honest with her including the spiritual truths you live in. Do not let prejudice interfere with your godly demeanor and let yourself see the value in (Ephesians 1:18-23) - that at all costs we are to reconcile people to the Lord for the point is in His Saints being a part of His familia; a part of His Kingdom. And eventually a part of the Kingdom of Heaven. Give nothing to grieve the Holy Spirit in, and to rob God of His glory.

Personally - I would find a time to talk openly and calmly about the feelings I had honestly with her and by mention of the specific acts you witnessed. Then I would allow her to speak and I would listen actively and intensely, being quiet within myself. Then I would ask God within myself to open up an opportunity to witness my faith to her in an act of kindness I could give her. Then, as God opened up the opportunity and rendered it clear to my spirit - I would obey Him in doing it.

For instance, when she agreed to give them back, or if she didn't - I would give them to her and a 5$ bill for lunch as well (example). I think of the Good Samaritan story in the Bible, and to this end I see my story allowing my acts to bring glory to God and not securing my rights which I never had in the first place.

"Lord, help in this situation with Blue and Denise, allow Your will to be understood and done Lord. Give Blue Your hand of guidance in this. Bless Denise in ways only You can, and give opportunity for Your message of 'good news' to be heard and experienced thru Blue - In Jesus' name I pray - Amen."
 

slave

Senior Member
Mar 20, 2015
6,307
1,097
113
So, Blue we have a predicament with Denise I see. You have not talked directly to her about what you feel based on what she has done? If not this is my first suggestion. To read her mind is impossible and you know that for you know the Bible that tells you that only God can read the hearts and minds of mankind. To speculate is not to yearn for her friendship at any cost. What would Christ Jesus do here? Give her what Christ would have for her to receive from you. You are not your own now you have been bought with a price. Give her the wealth of God's purposes and intentions over your own. This is also my suggestion.

Money may be her motivation - so what! I would then give her some of mine, even though I need it too, as a gift to gain her as a friend, offering it to God as a living sacrifice for His purposes and intentions over my own. God, I would trust, would have my back on my financial needs then as well. I would love on her God's way in other words - not in human reasoning ways. This is absurd to the world in what I mention - but I pray it is not absurd to you being in Christ. I trust I can give you this in love and you will receive it well.

“When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up I put away childish things,” (2 Corinthians 13:11). One of the “things” includes a selfish attitude. As we grow and mature we realize that everything is not ours and, as a matter of fact, it is all God’s. According to (Psalms 24:1), God owns everything. All the land, all the water, all the buildings, all the cars, all the houses, all the “everything” belongs to God. And He wants us to take care of it all.

Stewardship is taking care of something one does not own. From teaching toddlers to pick up toys to involving preteens in mission projects, we train our children that it’s all God’s and He has given us the privilege to take care of it for Him. Teaching and training children to be responsible stewards begins in the nursery and continues throughout our lives.

As you yield to Christ's vision - this will be an opportunity to be honest with her including the spiritual truths you live in. Do not let prejudice interfere with your godly demeanor and let yourself see the value in (Ephesians 1:18-23) - that at all costs we are to reconcile people to the Lord for the point is in His Saints being a part of His familia; a part of His Kingdom. And eventually a part of the Kingdom of Heaven. Give nothing to grieve the Holy Spirit in, and to rob God of His glory.

Personally - I would find a time to talk openly and calmly about the feelings I had honestly with her and by mention of the specific acts you witnessed. Then I would allow her to speak and I would listen actively and intensely, being quiet within myself. Then I would ask God within myself to open up an opportunity to witness my faith to her in an act of kindness I could give her. Then, as God opened up the opportunity and rendered it clear to my spirit - I would obey Him in doing it.

For instance, when she agreed to give them back, or if she didn't - I would give them to her and a 5$ bill for lunch as well (example). I think of the Good Samaritan story in the Bible, and to this end I see my story allowing my acts to bring glory to God and not securing my rights which I never had in the first place.

"Lord, help in this situation with Blue and Denise, allow Your will to be understood and done Lord. Give Blue Your hand of guidance in this. Bless Denise in ways only You can, and give opportunity for Your message of 'good news' to be heard and experienced thru Blue - In Jesus' name I pray - Amen."

(Luke 16:9): New International Version (NIV)

9 I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.
 

slave

Senior Member
Mar 20, 2015
6,307
1,097
113
Work time once again - I have been summonsed to a possible month of Jury Duty based on a Grand Jury Summons. Weeeee! Life is so fun huh? My work will not compensate me for pay in this so the 10$ a day won't suffice my needs - yet, God will work it out I am sure! It is assigned to me for June 29th 2018 @ 7am - More Weeeeee! Yet, God will work it out I am sure! For I place my heart & mind & body in Christ!!

I will let you know how it all turns out - May God receive His Glory! In this, I am sure He will! I claim the promises of God as well in supplying my needs. Amen. Have a great day peoples - the world will know we are Christians by our love for one another. Thus, rejoice in the Lord always and again I say - REJOICE! Chow4Now! (Did anyone discern a prayer request in there? Hmmmm :unsure::whistle::giggle:)
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
(Luke 16:9): New International Version (NIV)

9 I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.

Let me tell you a few things about Denise. She gets $15 per hour where she works, even when she does a 24-hour overnighter. Just between yesterday and today she made just about $400 because she didn't leave there until 11:30 a.m. this morning. So she's NOT wanting for money at all. I'm not trying to be petty or selfish here, I just want the shoes to go to someone who truly needs them. Denise can't wear them because she has to wear diabetic shoes, so her interest in taking them was purely monetary since she put a tag for $30 on them.

Denise is extremely generous in several areas, but she is VERY greedy when it comes to money. If something is out free, she brings it home if she thinks she can sell it. She's a hoarder so she brings it home regardless of whether she needs, sells or keeps it anyway.

I'm trying to do what Jesus would here. :) I feel He would give the shoes to someone truly in need of them, and not to someone whose sole interest in the shoes is to line her own pocket.

Denise makes it known very loudly, what is on her mind. Her actions are clear, she wants as much money as possible even if someone else has to go without. She has a TON of yard sale junk that she can't even sell because it's crappy junk and terribly overpriced. She doesn't need to add my shoes to the pile of stuff that sits in her apartment and doesn't get used. She even asked ME to sell HER stuff for her but the prices she wants are ridiculously exorbitant and NOBODY will pay that much for any of the stuff.

Maybe by me letting her know that I want the shoes to go free to a needy person, it will encourage HER to do the same and put some of her own stuff out free, just for the sake of clearing it out of her house. :) We both live in efficiencies and it's just two big rooms. HER place is sooo cluttered with junk, and MY place is virtually empty. LOL
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
Here is a legal definition of theft:


5-36-103. Theft of property.

(a) A person commits theft of property if he or she knowingly:

(1) Takes or exercises unauthorized control over or makes an unauthorized transfer of an interest in the property of another person with the purpose of depriving the owner of the property; or

(2) Obtains the property of another person by deception or by threat with the purpose of depriving the owner of the property.


In Blue's case.... the transfer of the interest in the property was illegal because it was not an authorized (accepted) transfer by the owner. In other words, Blue put the shoes out there with the sole purpose of helping a person in need of shoes (no pun intended).... The fact that it was free is not relevant. That just means the price tag is $0 dollars...

So when someone takes the shoes for a different purpose that was not authorized by the seller/owner, especially with the purpose of depriving the owner of their original intent (to help someone), or deprive them of the proceeds from the sale of their shoes, it is theft by definition of the law.

Gabe, I don't care if I don't get the money for them. That's why I put them out free. :) But what Denise did was sneaky and I'm not okay with that. She brought them in her house, hid them, and added them to her stuff, thinking I wouldn't see them. She left them in her house while we had a yard sale last weekend because she didn't want me to see them. Then stupidly put them in the container with her other stuff and left it in our hallway.. Where I could see it.. lol

Her greed of money truly blows my mind because she is so generous with everything else. She has no need at all for my shoes. But someone else out there does, so if at all possible, I'm going to make sure they go free and stay free.. lol
 

slave

Senior Member
Mar 20, 2015
6,307
1,097
113
Let me tell you a few things about Denise. She gets $15 per hour where she works, even when she does a 24-hour overnighter. Just between yesterday and today she made just about $400 because she didn't leave there until 11:30 a.m. this morning. So she's NOT wanting for money at all. I'm not trying to be petty or selfish here, I just want the shoes to go to someone who truly needs them. Denise can't wear them because she has to wear diabetic shoes, so her interest in taking them was purely monetary since she put a tag for $30 on them.

Denise is extremely generous in several areas, but she is VERY greedy when it comes to money. If something is out free, she brings it home if she thinks she can sell it. She's a hoarder so she brings it home regardless of whether she needs, sells or keeps it anyway.

I'm trying to do what Jesus would here. :) I feel He would give the shoes to someone truly in need of them, and not to someone whose sole interest in the shoes is to line her own pocket.

Denise makes it known very loudly, what is on her mind. Her actions are clear, she wants as much money as possible even if someone else has to go without. She has a TON of yard sale junk that she can't even sell because it's crappy junk and terribly overpriced. She doesn't need to add my shoes to the pile of stuff that sits in her apartment and doesn't get used. She even asked ME to sell HER stuff for her but the prices she wants are ridiculously exorbitant and NOBODY will pay that much for any of the stuff.

Maybe by me letting her know that I want the shoes to go free to a needy person, it will encourage HER to do the same and put some of her own stuff out free, just for the sake of clearing it out of her house. :) We both live in efficiencies and it's just two big rooms. HER place is sooo cluttered with junk, and MY place is virtually empty. LOL
I can talk later, but for now let me ask you one question as I flurry off to work - What is the difference between loving someone thru our service to God and loving someone thru Christ loving them thru us in serving them? God knows Denise better than I or you do; perhaps trusting Him on how to proceed and the arguments therein will be more spiritually beneficial. In fact, if we don't do it this way, it will have no spiritual Benefit. Do you believe that?

Don’t you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who comes from God and dwells inside of you? You do not own yourself. (1 Corinthians 6:19).
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
I can talk later, but for now let me ask you one question as I flurry off to work - What is the difference between loving someone thru our service to God and loving someone thru Christ loving them thru us in serving them? God knows Denise better than I or you do; perhaps trusting Him on how to proceed and the arguments therein will be more spiritually beneficial. In fact, if we don't do it this way, it will have no spiritual Benefit. Do you believe that?

Don’t you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who comes from God and dwells inside of you? You do not own yourself. (1 Corinthians 6:19).

I feel I'm serving her AND God by wanting to give the shoes to someone needy. Maybe if she sees me putting free stuff out for others, she'll do it also thereby helping herself and others. :)
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,894
113
I'm not sure about the tea but I'll take some of those bikkie things. Wait, what kinda tea we talkin' 'bout? Perhaps I will have a cup with a dash of honey and a lemon wedge. What's your take on brownies?
Oh your tea sounds much better 😋 and we both know that Mrs Tourist makes the bestest brownies aye 😉
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
I've decided to put the shoes back in her stuff, and ask her about it later on. :)

If I'm nice about it, I'm pretty sure she won't have a problem with it. :)
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,894
113
Work time once again - I have been summonsed to a possible month of Jury Duty based on a Grand Jury Summons. Weeeee! Life is so fun huh? My work will not compensate me for pay in this so the 10$ a day won't suffice my needs - yet, God will work it out I am sure! It is assigned to me for June 29th 2018 @ 7am - More Weeeeee! Yet, God will work it out I am sure! For I place my heart & mind & body in Christ!!

I will let you know how it all turns out - May God receive His Glory! In this, I am sure He will! I claim the promises of God as well in supplying my needs. Amen. Have a great day peoples - the world will know we are Christians by our love for one another. Thus, rejoice in the Lord always and again I say - REJOICE! Chow4Now! (Did anyone discern a prayer request in there? Hmmmm :unsure::whistle::giggle:)
May you have a blessed day brother! Be safe with God guiding you :)

Btw we get paid $25 a day for Jury Duty 😱

Blessings! And ketchup later!! 💙