I need counsel from someone who could tell me what Jesus would do in a certain situation

Ok so its a long story so sorry in advance. I lost my brother in 2015 since then understandably my mother has been in a deep depression my dad just ignored it happend and shut down. Then my mother was about leave my father and then she reconnected with a guy she knew whom she has always called her first love. So January of this year i get a call from my dad saying my mom doesn't love him and she is going to stay at the house but sleep with another man. Then everything blew up Then about a week later everything was fine they were going to stay friends.. then they rekindled and fell back in love ...So then my dad and mother try to convince me theyre happy.. im in complete denial.My dad has started coming over when she is at her lovers so obviously everything isnt ok So she is just with my dad for money and house because the guy she is with lives in a bus Im not judging i know im a sinner too but i am angry she is choosing to hurt my father and I.. but torn because i need my mom in my life.. also i dont want to condone what she is doing No discord she has no idea im resentful. If she did she would blame my dad because i can tell hes sad. And then he wouldnt be able to come over anymore. Im literally watching my dad dying on the inside and she doesnt care. If she left to be with her lover thats one thing. But she expects my dad to work 12 hour shifts make dinner and be at her beckon call while she sleeps with another man If she wanted to leave and be with another man that she loves fine but dont stay in a marriage so you can use that person and manipulate them because they still love you.

Anyway my question is .. i want a relationship with my mom and dont want to be resentful how do i do that without condoning her relationship

First thing you should do is give over all judgement to God and pray to God to send strong conviction upon your mother because what she is doing is adultery and a sin against the will of God.. Pray also for your dad that God will lead him in what to do in regards to the situation he is in.. And thirdly pray for Gods help for yourself to know how to deal with this situation..

We can keep in the lives of our family and at the same time not affirm or give support for their sins.. You can share your love for your mother to her and at the same time tell her that you do not support her relationship with the other man.. You can express a desire to maintain a relationship with your mother while at the same time deciding to have nothing to do with her relationship with the other man..

May the Holy Spirit guide you on the right path and may you follow His leading.. May you conscience be clear before the LORD in your dealings with your family..

It sounds to me like everyone is pandering to your mom to keep her happy and not continue to hurt everyone. She is manipulative and controlling and there's no way this behavior just stated recently.
Really what the more important thing here is she needs to stop having people let her walk all over them. Your dad needs to boot her out and she needs to know how you feel. And start having consequences.
She can mistreat everyone because no matter how bad she acts everyone chases after her and treats her like she's done nothing wrong. She has no consequences for her behavior, therefore no reason to change or care about anyone else.
I would label this a form of emotional abuse. And a couple of people enabling the abuse.

I totally agree with the two others before me. Praying that the Holy Spirit will help things and people, really works. It's putting out His truths in the 'Spirit' to them. Your dad being sad is not the answer and he needs to switch it up and have some respect for himself so others can. If you have a prayer partner you can trust have them agree with you in prayer over this. In the meanwhile, I agree with you that the Holy Spirit, our helper, will touch your parents (and even that other man) and lead them to love the truth more than lies, in Jesus' Name, Amen.

Lord bless CaitlinK, and this prayer request. In Jesus righteous name, Amen!

Oh sweetheart, what alot you have been through - you poor wee thing! I feel for you.
To me you sound very young. Your parent's problems are not your problems. You can only love each one of them as much as you are able - you can't solve everyone's problems, not even your parents, and you will never be able to. They have to work it out themselves. I believe your Mum may be being pandered to by your Dad - it may be because he still loves her & is hoping she will come back to him. Talk to him, & tell him in no uncertain terms to stop running after her. Tell both your parents that their behaviour is having a really bad effect on you. It sounds like you all could do with some counselling, or just go yourself, or with your Dad.
You cannot change peoples behaviour unless they WANT to change themselves.
My prayer for you:
Our wonderful Lord, please help Cait to support & stand up to each of her parents, & stand firm in her beliefs. Help her to get some counselling to work through all of her problems, & help her talk to her Dad & her Mum about their behaviour & the effect it is having on her. Amen.
Let us know how you get on won't you!

Time to disconnect from your parents' life and problems for a while. Learn from their mistakes. Value fidelity. Avoid the sin of manipulation . Avoid being manipulated. Value honest authentic relationships.
Try to sort your own life out. Tell them as much.
By staying away from both of them you can avoid being accused of taking sides.

Proverbs 3:5-6