Do you enjoy your singleness?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
So my lament is, where the heck are the real bible reading, Holy Spirit filled women who are not aspirational. Were they caught up in the rapture and no one told us??
So you are assuming that women are not filled with the Spirit if they like men to be masculine? I'm sure you would not like it if Christian women were masculine and not feminine. There are a lot of masculine guys who like animals etc.
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting a man to be a 'man', I would not want the burden of that role on me as I am the weaker vessel as the Bible says.
 
Nov 25, 2019
337
157
43
I LOVE animals but you won't find me knitting sweaters for them hahaha
 

VineyardsOfEngedi

Well-known member
Nov 26, 2019
872
292
63
I sew! and love every minute of it, and shout it from the rooftops as well :)
My dad can sew, I thought that was so cool growing up, actually I learned from him to hand sew :giggle:. My grandma was a seamstress, very good at that. She taught him and would help her. I don't consider him feminine at all.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
My dad can sew, I thought that was so cool growing up, actually I learned from him to hand sew :giggle:. My grandma was a seamstress, very good at that. She taught him and would help her. I don't consider him feminine at all.
Of course not... there are tailors... and I'm sure back in the day, a gentleman would not have felt comfortable with a lady/seamstress fitting him for a suit lol
 

VineyardsOfEngedi

Well-known member
Nov 26, 2019
872
292
63
Of course not... there are tailors... and I'm sure back in the day, a gentleman would not have felt comfortable with a lady/seamstress fitting him for a suit lol
I just meant cause some fellas here were ashamed to learn how to sew or to publicize that they know how to sew, that somehow, that makes them less manly? :unsure:
 
Nov 25, 2019
337
157
43
I have no problem with men tailors, that actually used to be the norm, not sure if it still is. One of the greatest Saints ever was St. Gerard and he was a tailor. Personally, I would rather have a man take my inseam as long as there is no "cupping" involved hahaha
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
I am grateful for my singleness. So I can say I enjoy it. I feel safe because I won't have to deal with issues like infidelity, abuse, monster in laws, raising children, financial problems etc. But I am willing to get out of my comfort zone if a suitable person comes along. Because I would like to cure my selfishness with marriage. Marriage will show us how selfish we are. It is more of a sacrifice than just wanting to be happy.

Choosing a spouse is one of the most important choices in life. Choose well singles! Or don't bother choosing. Life is good, single or married.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
This thread was originally about whether we enjoy life as single people.

I'm enjoying my life as a single guy.

I am guessing if I were married I would enjoy life as a married guy.

What I do not enjoy is arguments about whether I or anybody else should be single or married. Unfortunately those happen MUCH too often, in the forum and in real life.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
This thread was originally about whether we enjoy life as single people.

I'm enjoying my life as a single guy.

I am guessing if I were married I would enjoy life as a married guy.

What I do not enjoy is arguments about whether I or anybody else should be single or married. Unfortunately those happen MUCH too often, in the forum and in real life.
There are those on here who have tried to make me feel bad, wrong or somehow lacking because I desire to be married... but in Scripture there is a clearly room for both life-styles. It reminds me of the scripture about not judging if someone wants to be vegetarian or not🙂
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
This thread was originally about whether we enjoy life as single people.

I'm enjoying my life as a single guy.

I am guessing if I were married I would enjoy life as a married guy.

What I do not enjoy is arguments about whether I or anybody else should be single or married. Unfortunately those happen MUCH too often, in the forum and in real life.
And in answer to the question... I hate singleness... I have all this love and affection to give... and I desire in my heart to receive the same... and sometimes it breaks my heart... and there is nothing about that. It does make all the difference of course that I trust my Father that He works all together for my good, and that I have Him, the Comforter and His love and peace.... but I think that my circumstances limit how much I can enjoy singleness because I am a stay at home Mum so I don't have the freedom to go off travelling like some single people may, and I get sick regularly so am house-bound a lot. The Bible does say that 2 are better than one, and it would be nice and a lighter load of life was shared( not in a selfish way but in a complementing way). I also would value greatly a Christian man around my kids. But the Lord knows what is best and His grace is enough even though at times there is great pain in my heart about it.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
There are those on here who have tried to make me feel bad, wrong or somehow lacking because I desire to be married... but in Scripture there is a clearly room for both life-styles. It reminds me of the scripture about not judging if someone wants to be vegetarian or not🙂
Hmm, yes... although that verse has been overused a bit of late.

But yeah, I'm wlling to talk about whether I like or hate being single, and whether I do or don't want to be married. I have no interest in debating anybody who thinks I should or should not be married.

Besides... if they ever met me their "Everybody should try to find a spouse" might change to a "No! Never! YOU should stay single all your life!" real fast. :p
 

Mikhal

Active member
Nov 15, 2019
166
119
43
49
And in answer to the question... I hate singleness... I have all this love and affection to give... and I desire in my heart to receive the same... and sometimes it breaks my heart... and there is nothing about that. It does make all the difference of course that I trust my Father that He works all together for my good, and that I have Him, the Comforter and His love and peace.... but I think that my circumstances limit how much I can enjoy singleness because I am a stay at home Mum so I don't have the freedom to go off travelling like some single people may, and I get sick regularly so am house-bound a lot. The Bible does say that 2 are better than one, and it would be nice and a lighter load of life was shared( not in a selfish way but in a complementing way). I also would value greatly a Christian man around my kids. But the Lord knows what is best and His grace is enough even though at times there is great pain in my heart about it.
My heart goes out to you and all single Mothers, trying to fill both roles in this modern age... i wish that I lived close to you, because you would never feel alone. Im not speaking from a physical or relationship perspective either... YOU are absolutely right to feel like you do, because people as 'The Church' Dont live as GOD intended. In biblical times, People lived in societies that cared for one another- ate together, carried each others burdens, etc. (and in undeveloped countries they largely still do), so a person was never truly alone. GOD continuously speaks on caring for widows and orphans, its pretty clear as to why.
I was on a mission in the Caribbean and during my travels I was Blessed to stay a few Days with a Family in a Mennonite Community, GOD blessed me to see his perfect plan in action, these People Love each other, share each others burdens, Build with each, raise each others Children, Edify each other and so on.
Its Sad that people can memorize scripture, but struggle so hard to apply it.
Love you, sister. Know that you are definitely not alone, in these End times 😊❤. You and your children are in my prayers.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
My heart goes out to you and all single Mothers, trying to fill both roles in this modern age... i wish that I lived close to you, because you would never feel alone. Im not speaking from a physical or relationship perspective either... YOU are absolutely right to feel like you do, because people as 'The Church' Dont live as GOD intended. In biblical times, People lived in societies that cared for one another- ate together, carried each others burdens, etc. (and in undeveloped countries they largely still do), so a person was never truly alone. GOD continuously speaks on caring for widows and orphans, its pretty clear as to why.
I was on a mission in the Caribbean and during my travels I was Blessed to stay a few Days with a Family in a Mennonite Community, GOD blessed me to see his perfect plan in action, these People Love each other, share each others burdens, Build with each, raise each others Children, Edify each other and so on.
Its Sad that people can memorize scripture, but struggle so hard to apply it.
Love you, sister. Know that you are definitely not alone, in these End times 😊❤. You and your children are in my prayers.
Thank you... your message made me cry- it's so true what you have said; in the 9 years I have struggled bringing up 5 kids on my own very few Christians have obeyed the scripture you mentioned... I was only reading this morning what 'pure religion is'.... I thank God for those who pray for my family and for me...
I really appreciate your kindness.
God bless you.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
Hmm, yes... although that verse has been overused a bit of late.

But yeah, I'm wlling to talk about whether I like or hate being single, and whether I do or don't want to be married. I have no interest in debating anybody who thinks I should or should not be married.

Besides... if they ever met me their "Everybody should try to find a spouse" might change to a "No! Never! YOU should stay single all your life!" real fast. :p
Okay well if that scripture is over-used then there are lots of others that talk about two being better than one, finding a wife being a good thing, instructions for married people. It's a no-brainer that it's fine for me to desire in my heart to be married if scripturally I am permitted. The struggle is real so it hurts when there are those who are insensitive about it.
I guess I only end up debating when I think I could help prevent these people from going around hurting other fellow believers who may struggle in the same way.
But sure, I agree, the question on here requires an honest, non-judgemental response.🙂
 
Nov 25, 2019
337
157
43
And in answer to the question... I hate singleness... I have all this love and affection to give... and I desire in my heart to receive the same... and sometimes it breaks my heart... and there is nothing about that. It does make all the difference of course that I trust my Father that He works all together for my good, and that I have Him, the Comforter and His love and peace.... but I think that my circumstances limit how much I can enjoy singleness because I am a stay at home Mum so I don't have the freedom to go off travelling like some single people may, and I get sick regularly so am house-bound a lot. The Bible does say that 2 are better than one, and it would be nice and a lighter load of life was shared( not in a selfish way but in a complementing way). I also would value greatly a Christian man around my kids. But the Lord knows what is best and His grace is enough even though at times there is great pain in my heart about it.
I know that you struggle with being a single mom and having all those boys without a Dad but it's such an amazing gift and great duty you have fulfilled by bringing FIVE children into this world. I should be so lucky!
 
Nov 30, 2019
26
45
13
New England
For me, being single has its ups and downs. I miss having my best friend around to help me raise our son, even if it was shared custody but after his untimely death (2017) and what I've already experienced in the dating world, I think I'm more comfortable staying single. I've had my moments where I dated out of loneliness and I back-slid into a pit of sin. Now, I realize that I enjoy having my own space to come home to, a place of comfort and safety for both me and my son. I still have so much love to give but I'm cautious regarding who I bring into mine and my kid's lives.
 
Nov 25, 2019
337
157
43
you shouldn't have to worry about falling back into sin if you date the right people with the right intentions. For example, if you dated me, I would treat you like a sister in Christ and if it were to deepen past that there would be marriage. No sin would be a part of it, ever. Just an example.
 
Nov 30, 2019
26
45
13
New England
you shouldn't have to worry about falling back into sin if you date the right people with the right intentions. For example, if you dated me, I would treat you like a sister in Christ and if it were to deepen past that there would be marriage. No sin would be a part of it, ever. Just an example.
You're absolutely correct. A real partner in Christ would not tempt you to sin. However, sad as it may sound, there are many Wolves in Sheep Clothing out there posing as Christians (dating sites are notorious for this). I want to find someone that God Himself leads me to in order for us to grow together in faith.
 
Nov 25, 2019
337
157
43
You're absolutely correct. A real partner in Christ would not tempt you to sin. However, sad as it may sound, there are many Wolves in Sheep Clothing out there posing as Christians (dating sites are notorious for this). I want to find someone that God Himself leads me to in order for us to grow together in faith.
yeah, stay off those dating sites and let God do the work!