Need some encouragement today

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Beth220

Beth220

Member
#21
Jul 11, 2020
49
54
18
#21
bluewriter said:
Thank you for your prayers and encouragement! I've been claiming those verses. I started a prayer journal about 40 days ago and I've given the battle completely over to God Almighty. I'm trusting in Him.
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Amen! One of the best verses I can give you is: “Seek ye first the kingdom of heaven and it’s righteousness, and everything else will be added unto thee!”.... Matthew 6:33. Concentrate on your relationship with God and get your life right with God, confessing you’re sins to Him, but mostly surrendering all to Him......We have an advocate with The Father, Jesus Christ the righteous, and if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness......learn about the true love on 1Corinthians 13, read it every day, and pray your wife can have this same love; the love of Christ....
 
Billyd

Billyd

Senior Member
#22
May 8, 2014
5,048
1,490
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#22
Brother, I pray that you can reconcile your marriage. I also pray that the moment you feel anger creeping into your conversation, you will have the strength to walk away and let God take away your anger. Otherwise, you will be in the same position you are in now, only the restraining order will be permanent.
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#23
Mar 14, 2016
103
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#23
Billyd said:
Brother, I pray that you can reconcile your marriage. I also pray that the moment you feel anger creeping into your conversation, you will have the strength to walk away and let God take away your anger. Otherwise, you will be in the same position you are in now, only the restraining order will be permanent.
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Amen. I've learned my lesson.

Thank you for your prayers and support brother and God bless you.
 
MendedSoul

MendedSoul

Well-known member
#25
Sep 10, 2019
430
289
63
#25
Stay strong in the faith brother and I’m praying for God’s Will to be done in your life. Keep meditating and praying- all is not lost!
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#29
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#29
MendedSoul said:
Stay strong in the faith brother and I’m praying for God’s Will to be done in your life. Keep meditating and praying- all is not lost!
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Thank you so much. A timely word too. God bless you and thank you for your prayers brother.
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#32
Mar 14, 2016
103
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#32
I'm not sure if anyone will read this, but I want to say my game plan and ask what y'all think. So, in our time apart, I missed our wedding anniversary, Mother's Day, my disabled stepson's 8th grade graduation, and her birthday is the day before I can see her. My plan is to buy her a dozen of her favorite flowers with a card that says, "Happy Anniversary, Happy Mother's Day, and Happy Birthday". I plan to give her an anniversary gift of a handwritten "coupon" with a promise of vacation of three days and two nights at whatever ocean beach she would like to visit with hotel and food accommodations. A Mother's Day gift of a $40 Bath and Body Works gift card and a handwritten "coupon" for a 30 minute full body massage. A birthday gift of a $25 Starbucks gift card as well as a 365 page daily prayer book for women. A couple boxes of chocolates. My stepson's graduation card and $20 for him. And my handwritten note telling her that I've repented, sought therapy for my anger and resentments, acknowledgement that she was right that I needed help for my angry reactions, an appeal to our faith in Christ to give me a second chance, a promise that I will make whatever concessions are needed for everyone in our home to feel loved, respected, and listened to, and a timeline of 40 days to see that I've truly changed and that if she doesn't believe I have, I will agree to her divorce to make her happy. I plan to bring this to her work in a gift bag the day the order of protection expires and to ask her if she will attend church with me that night as husband and wife.

Does this sound like a solid plan?
 
O

oldethennew

Banned
#33
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
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#33
I've never been led to say something quite just like this before, but, I will say it,
this sounds like a 'demonic-joke', to joke others who will not get it. but a
very cruel avenue to hurt/destroy others hearts, to say the least!!!
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#34
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#34
oldethennew said:
I've never been led to say something quite just like this before, but, I will say it,
this sounds like a 'demonic-joke', to joke others who will not get it. but a
very cruel avenue to hurt/destroy others hearts, to say the least!!!
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You mean what my wife is doing?
 
O

oldethennew

Banned
#35
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
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#35
NO,b
what u are doing!!!
may Yeshua have mercy upon your wicked heart!!!
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#36
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#36
oldethennew said:
NO,b
what u are doing!!!
may Yeshua have mercy upon your wicked heart!!!
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What did I do? I asked for encouragement not to do something wrong during a time of great distress. The encouragement I got here has helped me stay faithful and keep my hands and heart clean for my wife. I didn't go into all the things she has done wrong to hurt me because it's irrelevant to how much I love her and how I feel about marriage. I think I've done outstanding really.
 
O

oldethennew

Banned
#37
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
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#37
when one puts their actions upon another for their own actions, then a very important question comes
to the readers of such, and that would be, at least for me/us, what lengths they will go to to absolve
themselves before God first, and then of course, their fellow man...???
 
B

bluewriter

Junior Member
#38
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#38
oldethennew said:
when one puts their actions upon another for their own actions, then a very important question comes
to the readers of such, and that would be, at least for me/us, what lengths they will go to to absolve
themselves before God first, and then of course, their fellow man...???
Click to expand...
I'm not sure what you're implying in this that requires mercy on my "wicked heart."

We argued a lot because we had very stressful circumstances in our lives and because my wife would constantly start arguments and be hateful towards me instead of discussing things like mature adults do. My character default was to get angry and defensive when she started arguments based upon absolute lies that she just made up (which is VERY frustrating). I'm a mental health practitioner by trade and I'm fairly certain in saying she has mental health issues. She constantly projected on me by calling me a liar and a narcissist when she was lying and acting like a narcissist. Again, my problem was getting defensive. What I've learned in our time apart is something I should have learned years ago: I cannot have an honest, logical discussion with my wife - I have to speak directly to her emotions and feelings and be graceful when she is lying and accusing me of things I didn't do.
 
Beth220

Beth220

Member
#39
Jul 11, 2020
49
54
18
#39
bluewriter said:
I'm not sure if anyone will read this, but I want to say my game plan and ask what y'all think. So, in our time apart, I missed our wedding anniversary, Mother's Day, my disabled stepson's 8th grade graduation, and her birthday is the day before I can see her. My plan is to buy her a dozen of her favorite flowers with a card that says, "Happy Anniversary, Happy Mother's Day, and Happy Birthday". I plan to give her an anniversary gift of a handwritten "coupon" with a promise of vacation of three days and two nights at whatever ocean beach she would like to visit with hotel and food accommodations. A Mother's Day gift of a $40 Bath and Body Works gift card and a handwritten "coupon" for a 30 minute full body massage. A birthday gift of a $25 Starbucks gift card as well as a 365 page daily prayer book for women. A couple boxes of chocolates. My stepson's graduation card and $20 for him. And my handwritten note telling her that I've repented, sought therapy for my anger and resentments, acknowledgement that she was right that I needed help for my angry reactions, an appeal to our faith in Christ to give me a second chance, a promise that I will make whatever concessions are needed for everyone in our home to feel loved, respected, and listened to, and a timeline of 40 days to see that I've truly changed and that if she doesn't believe I have, I will agree to her divorce to make her happy. I plan to bring this to her work in a gift bag the day the order of protection expires and to ask her if she will attend church with me that night as husband and wife.

Does this sound like a solid plan?
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I believe you really love your wife and are sincere of your repentance, and wanting to make things right, but I believe you need to take a li8mote time asking God to guide you on how you should go, you need to give God time to work in her heart and prepare her to accept to talk to you, if you do all this right now she might think you are trying to buy her. I say wait a couple of days and pray for Hod to show you what you need to say. Everything you are planning on doing is good after she decides to talk to you. Pour out your heart to her and let her know that you are a new person in Christ Jesus, and introduce her to your new friend. Before you and her can be in love with each other again, you first need to fall on love with Jesus, and only then you will have a healthy and blessed marriage cause He will be the center of your marriage, and your marriage cant go wrong....will keep on praying brother. God bless you...
 
O

oldethennew

Banned
#40
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
113
#40
you are a very great 'whiner/blamer', and for sure should not be 'out there' pretending to be able
to 'help others'...
try speaking to yourself and seeing yourself through your own eyes, for obviously you are not at this time
able to see 'yourself' through any one elses, much less through Yeshua's...
you are as sick as is your wife is, your own words have said as much...

please, try and find a 'real solution/reason for your 'own' actions...
 
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