Is it Biblically permissive to beat one's wife?

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CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
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#21
Perhaps you protest too much? You can report me all you want. I guarantee the countless research papers I’ve read over the years and psychology articles to examine how we are wonderfully made, has been more exhaustive than your conclusions on my exhibition and pedophilia habits. I was just as surprised as you to see the results, not as indignant, but definitely not what I expected. All my life I noticed how women tended to fall for the jerks while nice guys bringing flowers are looked over. It’s not jerks women fall for. It’s dominance that triggers procreative urges to maintain strong genetics. Your response is indicative of your bias towards new information. Good luck in life.
FYI the point is " Spanking" one's wife so she has sexual gratification as your Secular humanistic psychology and worldly counsel of positional papers are not authoritative as the Word of God is. Second, the American Psychological Association (APA) has long been abandoned sound science and chosen to be political as many of those in the APA are homosexuals. Justify a sexual perversion all you want. IF you spank women to sexually satisfy them and prove you are not as you say " a jerk" Then you are doing as the bible said not to do you dishonor yourself by taking advantage of an ignorant woman.
2tim3:1-8

1 Don't be naive. There are difficult times ahead.

2 As the end approaches, people are going to be self-absorbed, money-hungry, self-promoting, stuck-up, profane, contemptuous of parents, crude, coarse,

3 dog-eat-dog, unbending, slanderers, impulsively wild, savage, cynical,

4 treacherous, ruthless, bloated windbags, addicted to lust, and allergic to God.

5 They'll make a show of religion, but behind the scenes they're animals. Stay clear of these people.

6 These are the kind of people who smooth-talk themselves into the homes of unstable and needy women and take advantage of them;
women who, depressed by their sinfulness, take up with every new religious fad that calls itself "truth."

7 They get exploited every time and never really learn.

8 These men are like those old Egyptian frauds Jannes and Jambres, who challenged Moses. They were rejects from the faith, twisted in their thinking, defying truth itself.


Prov 5:21-23

For the Lord sees clearly what a man does,
examining every path he takes.
22 An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
they are ropes that catch and hold him.
23 He will die for lack of self-control;
he will be lost because of his great foolishness.
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#22
FYI the point is " Spanking" one's wife so she has sexual gratification as your Secular humanistic psychology and worldly counsel of positional papers are not authoritative as the Word of God is. Second, the American Psychological Association (APA) has long been abandoned sound science and chosen to be political as many of those in the APA are homosexuals. Justify a sexual perversion all you want. IF you spank women to sexually satisfy them and prove you are not as you say " a jerk" Then you are doing as the bible said not to do you dishonor yourself by taking advantage of an ignorant woman.
2tim3:1-8

1 Don't be naive. There are difficult times ahead.

2 As the end approaches, people are going to be self-absorbed, money-hungry, self-promoting, stuck-up, profane, contemptuous of parents, crude, coarse,

3 dog-eat-dog, unbending, slanderers, impulsively wild, savage, cynical,

4 treacherous, ruthless, bloated windbags, addicted to lust, and allergic to God.

5 They'll make a show of religion, but behind the scenes they're animals. Stay clear of these people.

6 These are the kind of people who smooth-talk themselves into the homes of unstable and needy women and take advantage of them; women who, depressed by their sinfulness, take up with every new religious fad that calls itself "truth."

7 They get exploited every time and never really learn.

8 These men are like those old Egyptian frauds Jannes and Jambres, who challenged Moses. They were rejects from the faith, twisted in their thinking, defying truth itself.


Prov 5:21-23

For the Lord sees clearly what a man does,
examining every path he takes.
22 An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
they are ropes that catch and hold him.
23 He will die for lack of self-control;
he will be lost because of his great foolishness.
FYI, I wasn’t talking about spanking for sexual gratification for him and or her. I was merely pointing out that many women wouldn’t be as opposed to being corporally punished as you may think. Just because you have some preconceptions on the matter doesn’t illegitimatize what I’ve stated. Throwing unrelated scripture and your unfounded opinion at me doesn’t prove your point. Much of our reproductive behaviour is animalistic. There is no spiritual sexuality. We can use our reproductive organs to express love, sure. However what kind of person we crave and physicality we lust is generally from the endocrine system. It’s hormone and pheromone based and psychologically tuned. You can’t escape this regardless of how much irrelevant scripture you attack it with. Im not carnally minded in the least. I prefer to be asexual. You assuming because of my comments I am some sort of pervert is exemplary of your short sightedness. I study many things. I am “Hungry” for Truth, and “Hungry” for knowledge. What I believe aligns with Scripture if there is Scripture to align it with. Some things are Scripturally ambiguous, with this being one of them.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#23
Much of our reproductive behaviour is animalistic. There is no spiritual sexuality. We can use our reproductive organs to express love, sure. However what kind of person we crave and physicality we lust is generally from the endocrine system. It’s hormone and pheromone based and psychologically tuned. You can’t escape this regardless of how much irrelevant scripture you attack it with. Im not carnally minded in the least. I prefer to be asexual.
This is true. Women experience more lust around their periods which is linked to fertility, I believe caused by a change in hormones.
 

TheLearner

Well-known member
Jan 14, 2019
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#24
There is no excuse ever for physical violence against a woman, except in the rare cases of self defence. Children should be physically disciplined, but adults, never. One reason is that violence escalates. Too often a violent man goes too far and kills his wife. Alcohol and/or drugs are usually involved. Christian men are exhorted to love their wives. No sane man is going to beat himself physically because he fails to meet an expectation. Why should he be allowed to beat his wife?

1 Corinthians 7:12-16 gives us God's view on situations where one spouse is saved and one is not. One of the keys is that the unbelieving spouse is willing to live in peace. If they are not willing and leave the relationship, the Christian spouse is not responsible.

As in all things, it is vital to seek God's will before making a decision.
I totally agree violence against women and other people is uncalled for.
 

ewq1938

Well-known member
Oct 18, 2018
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#25
I totally agree violence against women and other people is uncalled for.
And the bible DOES NOT promote violence against women nor that women should tolerate violence from their husbands.
 

TheLearner

Well-known member
Jan 14, 2019
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#26
NO. Plain and simple: NO. Ephesians 5:"22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.a 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body."
Did verse 21 say for married couples to submit to each other?
 

Blade

Well-known member
Nov 19, 2019
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#28
Well for me what He my lord and savior.. in the middle of a fight.. you know thinking right now she was all in the wrong yet He never showed me this. Wow just now after all this time haha something so easy never seen it. See in the middle of that fight .. praise you Jesus.. He showed me her heart. What was so shocking is her heart was the opposite of what I was seeing. hearing.

Then for about 20 seconds I had this love for her I have never had. Something with in me wanted nothing more then to just please her as if she was a queen. No I thought if this is how she will be for the rest of our lifes.. this mean violent.. I didn't care what so ever. It was such a reward to just please her.. to make her happen never wanting ANYTHING from her. To give and give and give.. was like the best reward ever. THAT was so odd. I though this is what it means to love your enemy.

So for me.. I will love her as Christ loves the Church. Trust me.. no matter WHO it is.. unless HE shows you the heart.. you are not truly seeing the person.

No matter how many times I remember this.. the word says we are more blessed to give then receive. Back in that moment.. To just give to just bless her I felt was such a great reward.. it was like I was getting reward after reward.. I can't explain it. The flip side of this world. Not saying this as FACT.. its just in my life in that moment what He showed me.. I just cry wish I had learned it 40 years ago for its no how what she does for me.. but what I do for Her in HIS name.. for HIS glory. I always thought about me first.. forgive me Father..
 

TheLearner

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#29
The Bible does not specifically discuss domestic abuse (for or against), but speaks generally on how spouses should treat each other (with love, respect, honor, etc.). So no, I don't think it is permissive.

But the main question I believe the OP was asking, which I do not see discussed above, was whether the wife should submit/put up with domestic abuse.
To everyone, how does this text relate to the discussion? thanks

Exodus 21:10-11

Good News Translation



10 If a man takes a second wife, he must continue to give his first wife the same amount of food and clothing and the same rights that she had before. 11 If he does not fulfill these duties to her, he must set her free and not receive any payment.
 

TheLearner

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#30
TheLearner was right.

It’s talking about a wife who is with Jesus but married to a husband that isn’t with Jesus.

The verses about treating good was for those who are Christians and trying to be.

But the point of post was that the wife isn’t with a godly man nor one who is trying to be. So Paul is saying God expects her to withstand the abuse and never insult or fight back and be kind like Jesus did in the hope that the husband would be won over to believing in Jesus as well. It’s that kindness and not fighting back while abused that can sometimes make a person see there’s something special about them that they still love and are not fighting back.

The thing is, unless God gives a woman or anyone the power of the Holy Spirit to withstand that abuse, no one can cause all people are made different with different levels of mental and physical. Like able to handle stress or stay calm or not be mentally ill. There may be some that have great constitutions mentally abd to handle stress but w/o the Holy Spirit nothing pleases God because it’s then the person in their own strength doing the works.

The idea of taking abuse is like slavery and Slavery was instituted by God. He put His people through slavery 400 years as a way of submission as what Jesus went through suffering and having to be patient and obey while oppressed. There is many verses about this people have no idea it’s not how they think.
Why assume unbelievers will abuse their spouse and not Christians?
 

TheLearner

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Jan 14, 2019
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#31
Don't listen to what "the learner" is saying. The bible does not say nor infer "that wives are to stand some buffeting like slaves, and be submissive even to the harsh, and take ill treatment patiently like Jesus."

He also ignores this:

1Pe 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife , as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.


Here is the actual passage which does not have anything that this member claims:


1Pe 2:8 And a stone of stumbling, and a rock of offence, even to them which stumble at the word, being disobedient: whereunto also they were appointed.
1Pe 2:9 But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:
1Pe 2:10 Which in time past were not a people, but are now the people of God: which had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy.
1Pe 2:11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul;
1Pe 2:12 Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation.
Submission to Authority
1Pe 2:13 Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme;
1Pe 2:14 Or unto governors, as unto them that are sent by him for the punishment of evildoers, and for the praise of them that do well.
1Pe 2:15 For so is the will of God, that with well doing ye may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men:
1Pe 2:16 As free, and not using your liberty for a cloke of maliciousness, but as the servants of God.
1Pe 2:17 Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.
1Pe 2:18 Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward.
1Pe 2:19 For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully.
1Pe 2:20 For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God.
1Pe 2:21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps:
1Pe 2:22 Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth:
1Pe 2:23 Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously:
1Pe 2:24 Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.
1Pe 2:25 For ye were as sheep going astray; but are now returned unto the Shepherd and Bishop of your souls.

Pe 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
1Pe 3:2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1Pe 3:3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
1Pe 3:4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
1Pe 3:5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
1Pe 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
1Pe 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
Suffering for Righteousness' Sake
1Pe 3:8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
1Pe 3:9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1Pe 3:10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
1Pe 3:11 Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
1Pe 3:12 For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1Pe 3:13 And who is he that will harm you, if ye be followers of that which is good?
1Pe 3:14 But and if ye suffer for righteousness' sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled;
1Pe 3:15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:
1Pe 3:16 Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.
1Pe 3:17 For it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.
1Pe 3:18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:
1Pe 3:19 By which also he went and preached unto the spirits in prison;
1Pe 3:20 Which sometime were disobedient, when once the longsuffering of God waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was a preparing, wherein few, that is, eight souls were saved by water.
1Pe 3:21 The like figure whereunto even baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God,) by the resurrection of Jesus Christ:
1Pe 3:22 Who is gone into heaven, and is on the right hand of God; angels and authorities and powers being made subject unto him.
thanks for the input. I was quoting someone I am against for trying to justify abusing women.
 

ewq1938

Well-known member
Oct 18, 2018
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#32
thanks for the input. I was quoting someone I am against for trying to justify abusing women.
The passage you posted does not support that woman should tolerate abuse from their husbands yet you said it does. You misrepresented what the passage was saying. That's the issue here.
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#33
This is true. Women experience more lust around their periods which is linked to fertility, I believe caused by a change in hormones.
Men’s testosterone increases by 50% at the scent of vaginal secretion. We are encouraged by our endocrine system, but we are fully capable of control.
 

TheLearner

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#34
The passage you posted does not support that woman should tolerate abuse from their husbands yet you said it does. You misrepresented what the passage was saying. That's the issue here.
I quoted a source to expose its false teaching. I never claimed that women should put up with abuse.

In the second post I qualified that "From my reading the author of the study is justifly men beating, abusing their wives. I think to do so would be a serious sin. "
 

TheLearner

Well-known member
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#35
And the bible DOES NOT promote violence against women nor that women should tolerate violence from their husbands.
I never said it did. I quoted a "study" to expose it. It was the study that was trying to justify it being ok to abuse women.
 

KALYNA18

Senior Member
Oct 25, 2016
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#36
The LOve of God, is peaceful, and gentle patient and king , merciful, and long suffering, and the rest of the fruits of the HOly Spirit. There's room at the cross, for rage, and anger, unforgiveness, and bullies. There is also room in prisons. There are places of women of domestic violence, and the bible says do not know an angry man. The bible says, Husbands love your wifes even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. This is God' character, to LOVe, for God is love, he that loveth not knows not God. It is even a crime to hit a dog, or abuse one, are you serious. ? Husbands LOVE YOUR WIFES even as Christ loveth the church, and gave himself for her. Bible verse.
 

proverbs35

Senior Member
Nov 10, 2012
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#38
To make this thread positive, post about how to treat one's wife.
The Bible says that husbands should …

- Leave their mother and father and be united with their wives. Ephesians 5:31
-LOVE wives like Christ loved the church. Eph 5:25
- DIE for their wives. Eph 5:25
- NOURISH and CHERISH their wives. Eph 5:29
- should not be harsh with their wives. Col 3:19
- PRAISE their wives for their good deeds. Pro 31:28
- TRUST their wives, if they are virtuous. Pro 31:11
- HONOR their wives. 1 Pet 3:7
- dwell with their wives in an UNDERSTANDING way. 1 Pet 3:7
- Recognize and treat their wives as co-heirs of grace. 1 Pet 3:7
- be FAITHFUL to their own wives. Pro 5:15
- should not have sex with other women. Pro 5:17
- be happy with the wives they married when they were young. Pro 5:18
- be attracted to their own wives and stay deeply in love. Pro 5:19
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#39
There is no excuse ever for physical violence against a woman, except in the rare cases of self defence. Children should be physically disciplined, but adults, never. One reason is that violence escalates. Too often a violent man goes too far and kills his wife. Alcohol and/or drugs are usually involved. Christian men are exhorted to love their wives. No sane man is going to beat himself physically because he fails to meet an expectation. Why should he be allowed to beat his wife?

1 Corinthians 7:12-16 gives us God's view on situations where one spouse is saved and one is not. One of the keys is that the unbelieving spouse is willing to live in peace. If they are not willing and leave the relationship, the Christian spouse is not responsible.

As in all things, it is vital to seek God's will before making a decision.
Just to comment on the section in bold, if a parent has a temper and is an alcoholic and/or drug addict, a child should also not be physically punished. Do you think they are less likely to be injured or killed? As far as sane men not physically abusing themselves, I can’t remember which Christian resource it was but there was a suggestion to classically condition the eyes to avoid looking at tempting images. A rubber band would be worn on the wrist. Any time your eyes gazed upon female curves, or looked too long at a tempting picture, you would snap the band on the inside of the wrist. Pain is an effective tool for classic conditioning. The problem isn’t the catalyst (pain) to correct a behaviour. The problem is the one who is issuing the discipline. It should be administered by an authoritarian to correct a behaviour, not by a person to force authority. That’s what happens usually. The authority needs to be recognized primarily. If not, that’s when it escalates because it becomes a battle of wills and refusal to submit to another. All discipline is only effective if hierarchy is established and the rules are laid out and understood. Otherwise it is considered an attack conceptually.