Don't Be In A Hurry To Get Married

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PrivateBadge45

Guest
#1
It's not as romantic as some Christian seminars make it sound,
and certainly nothing like TV and the movies or secular songs.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,940
4,581
113
#2
It's not as romantic as some Christian seminars make it sound,
and certainly nothing like TV and the movies or secular songs.
Hi Private Badge,

Thanks for keeping us grounded in reality.

Any stories you care to share, and any advice on how to avoid making hasty decisions?
 

JustJames

New member
Sep 18, 2021
27
17
3
#3
Well women pay me no mind everywhere I go so I think I'm in the clear.
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
3,633
1,426
113
#5
Well women pay me no mind everywhere I go so I think I'm in the clear.
Yah, same here. I'm in no danger.

Well, you just told the world, the secret is out. I'm just a little scared on how many ladies are gonna be given you two attention now....LOOK OUT! :)

It's not as romantic as some Christian seminars make it sound,
and certainly nothing like TV and the movies or secular songs.

Yeah, all you have to do is stay single long enough, and you will hear some stories of the married life. I think once you understand the game, you don't like the game anymore, and you just sort of find a different path.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#6
Well, you just told the world, the secret is out. I'm just a little scared on how many ladies are gonna be given you two attention now....LOOK OUT! :)
I ain't worried. I haven't kept it a secret before now and I've been fine.
 
Sep 14, 2021
40
37
18
#7
Yes, don't be in a hurry and make the same mistake as me. After my 1st marriage had ended in divorce, I rushed too soon to be married again. My 2nd wife gave me lots of attention and asked many times that we could be married. So I set the date and we were married. Was a long distance romance so I did not know what she was hiding from me when we were apart. What she was hiding was that she was a Christian and not a believer. After 9 years of patiently trying to see fruit and growth in her Christian walk, she decided that I was not worthy of her love any longer and decided to have a couple affairs. One of them to a man 30 years younger. When he broke off the relationship, she became mentally abusive to me. I began to see more and more that we were unequally yoked. In counselling to save the marriage, she revealed that she never really loved me and that her love for me was a lie! A year later, divorce was granted by the courts.
Since then I refuse to be involved in a long distance relationship and I refuse to lower standards just to have a girlfriend. Enjoy the relationship and engagement period. No need in these times to hurry to marry.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#8
wow havent people heard the phrase

Marry in haste, repent at leisure.


I suspect not... but its a well known maxim the world over. If it wasnt true people wouldnt keep quoting it.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
3,644
2,864
113
#9
I find such threads fruitless. Those eager to marry are not going to magically change their mind over posts like these.
You've got some pushing marriage and others embittered by their own negative experience they actively discourage the very idea of it.

Neither mindset is helpful. Rather it makes more sense to teach people how to make smart choices with their life as a single and how to spot and acknowledge red flags in potential interests.
People are going to marry, and some in a hurry. Its more beneficial to give them the right tools to make better choices and know what to expect than simply telling them it's not good.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#10
I find such threads fruitless. Those eager to marry are not going to magically change their mind over posts like these.
You've got some pushing marriage and others embittered by their own negative experience they actively discourage the very idea of it.

Neither mindset is helpful. Rather it makes more sense to teach people how to make smart choices with their life as a single and how to spot and acknowledge red flags in potential interests.
People are going to marry, and some in a hurry. Its more beneficial to give them the right tools to make better choices and know what to expect than simply telling them it's not good.
Well... You're not wrong. But post like this aren't going to stop people from making threads like this either. It's just one-a-them thangs what gonna happen.
 

JustJames

New member
Sep 18, 2021
27
17
3
#11
Well I for one had my mind changed. Tomorrow I shall find me a wife!
 

EmilyNats

Senior Member
Jul 28, 2016
1,374
204
63
#12
Don't be hasty about it, but when you find the right one then there's no need to wait a huge amount of time either. Just follow God's lead, wherever that may take you.
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
3,633
1,426
113
#13
Well I for one had my mind changed. Tomorrow I shall find me a wife!
I find such threads fruitless. Those eager to marry are not going to magically change their mind over posts like these.
You've got some pushing marriage and others embittered by their own negative experience they actively discourage the very idea of it.

Neither mindset is helpful. Rather it makes more sense to teach people how to make smart choices with their life as a single and how to spot and acknowledge red flags in potential interests.
People are going to marry, and some in a hurry. Its more beneficial to give them the right tools to make better choices and know what to expect than simply telling them it's not good.
:)

Is it to late to change your mind, on people not changing their mind?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#14
wow..that was a quick turnaround! lol
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#18
Go to the Gun thread on CC and have a shot gun wedding.