Why Are Women Expected to be the Gatekeepers of Virginity?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#343
Aug 13, 2014
24,895
8,156
113
#343
It beets some gardens we could have walked through.
 
JohnDB

JohnDB

Well-known member
#345
Jan 16, 2021
5,599
2,200
113
#345
Actually I like beets made sweet and sour...those taste pretty good AND they are loaded with iron that keeps you from going anemic. Puts color in your cheeks...and on your tongue.

Borsht can be good too...I'm not a fan of the beet puree one as much as the one with lots of goose or duck. (There are several variants)

So don't be dissing the Borsht.

 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#346
#346
JohnDB said:
Actually I like beets made sweet and sour...those taste pretty good AND they are loaded with iron that keeps you from going anemic. Puts color in your cheeks...and on your tongue.

Borsht can be good too...I'm not a fan of the beet puree one as much as the one with lots of goose or duck. (There are several variants)

So don't be dissing the Borsht.

Click to expand...

I think we'd all learn to like beets if they were prepared by someone with your talent. Very hard to a cook worth their salt, so to speak. Restaurant food is horrible, most of the food prepared today is straight out of a box.
 
JohnDB

JohnDB

Well-known member
#347
Jan 16, 2021
5,599
2,200
113
#347
kaylagrl said:
I think we'd all learn to like beets if they were prepared by someone with your talent. Very hard to a cook worth their salt, so to speak. Restaurant food is horrible, most of the food prepared today is straight out of a box.
Click to expand...
My wife has been allowing me to get whatever I want during the pandemic...as a result I have made everything commercially prepared taste horrible...

Everything from all trumps flour to sausage stuffers...she has let me just buy it. Since we aren't eating out I can (and have) made anything and everything I have desired. All depending on what I can find and as the mood has struck me.

And I have done everything from curing my own corned beef, kielbasas, to yeast risen donuts. We looked at the dominos pizza last night and turned up our noses at it because I had made frozen pizza shells and had ourselves some ready in ten minutes at the house...
This morning we are having home made sausage patties and some yeast risen cinnamon rolls...why eat out and be disappointed, disgusted, and annoyed?

Obviously I am horribly bored...I need out. But we have saved a TON of money and eaten better than ever before. I got my wife and I a box of snack cakes at the store and she tossed them because she claims they tasted nasty. So I baked off some brownies and she was satisfied with those.

The list of available menu items in my house is rather extensive...
Everyone usually has a list of foods that they are competent at and the family likes...mine is about triple that. (At least)
The choices get to be a bit much though in trying to decide what to make. Too much to choose from.
 
Lanolin

Lanolin

Well-known member
#348
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,176
113
#348
beets or beetroot...are they the same?

I have no idea why beetroot is the staple filling in a McDonalds kiwiburger (not mde of actual kiwis..or kiwifruit)
 
JohnDB

JohnDB

Well-known member
#350
Jan 16, 2021
5,599
2,200
113
#350
Oh puhleeze there @cinder .....give us some love!

You know you want a plate full of beets.
:p
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#351
Aug 13, 2014
24,895
8,156
113
#351
seoulsearch said:
I'm going to have to dock you -3 points for that bad of a pun. :ROFL:

And it's only because I couldn't come up with a better one. :D
Click to expand...
Oh come on! I know this thread has strayed a bit off the beeten path, but I'm sure we can rake it in by harvest time and everything will be vine.
 
Gojira

Gojira

Well-known member
#353
Jul 20, 2021
5,695
2,302
113
Mesa, AZ
#353
seoulsearch said:
This is why I find your posts so hard to answer.

With every reply, you try to tell me how my own life has gone because you say that people don't act in the manner I'm describing (only because you haven't experienced it,) thereby denying my own experiences, and then try to tell me what I should do, as you just did above: "the question you asked on here SHOULD HAVE BEEN..."

But yet you want everyone and their mother to listen to every grievance you've ever had regarding your own experiences.

You hint that mine aren't real, but yet want me to listen to every word of yours. And then you tell me I don't know anything about what men go through, and what I should be asking.

The question I wrote in this post is exactly the question I wanted to write. I had no interest in writing about what you are saying I should have asked. I've seen a zillion threads about why people need to remain virgins before marriage, but I hadn't seen a thread that asked about the influences of society putting more pressure on women to do so with that added expectation that their influence should rub off on their dates.

Now of course it can go both ways, and as someone pointed out, I realize that women are becoming more aggressive. But I see this as just another integral part of the discussion: social attitudes about women's sexuality have changed, and so this thread is about exploring some of the impact of those changes.

Whatever question you feel should have been asked, why wouldn't you start your own thread about it, rather than trying to say what I should have asked in mine?

I do understand that this is something to be expected whenever one writes a thread -- there will always be someone who tries to tell you what you should have done differently -- it just comes with the territory.

But what I don't understand is that 99.9% of the time, the person won't just write their own thread themselves. Why not?

If you want to write your own question about why men and women should remain virgins before marriage (as if no one in the audience is aware of that,) then why aren't you?

As I said, I've seen dozens and dozens of discussions about that subject.

It's certainly not that it isn't something important that needs to be talked about (again, and again, and again) -- it's just that I wanted to try something different, and ask about things I've never seen anyone here ask.
Click to expand...
I did come here knowing that some people would piss me off from time to time. Like you say, this goes with the territory. Actually, in real life it happens too. Every Christian has their own opinion. Sometimes it's edifying, and sometimes it's "Lord... help me to forgive this person?!?"

I'm sure you know that within the kingdom of God, there are no favorites. When a couple was caught in adultery in ancient Israel, both parties were stoned to death (unlike their macho Muslim male counterparts). There are differences in roles that are prescribed, but not morality.

Chalk this up to humans being stupid, imperfect humans. No reason, no rationality, just stupid feelings based on our fallenness that cause these inequities.

If you and I dated (I think I'd get the better end of that deal!), I would not put all of the moral burden onto you. I am just as responsible. In fact, I might even put a little more responsibility on me since I'm supposed to be the leader.

Anyway... I hope that helps in some way??
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#354
#354
thought I would throw this into the mix and make enemies :LOL:

and there are 4 more 'reasons' for the intrepid reader to examine in that article

I thought the heavy type paragraph was pretty insightful (I mean we should know this, but it seems overlooked in the general attitudes towards blaming 'bad' girls)


1.Men Idolize a Woman’s Sexual Purity More Than Women Idolize a Man’s Sexual Purity

I think the main reason there is a double standard in sexuality for Christian males and females is because males are the ones who idolize sex most. Certainly some women idolize sex, but I think it’s clear that more men on average idolize sex than women.

Because many men believe sex is the secret treasure box to everlasting happiness, they also believe to unlock this treasure they need a perfectly pure virgin. Since not as many women believe sex with a man is what will make them deeply happy for the rest of their lives, they do not value a man’s virginity as high as men value a woman’s virginity.

I’m not saying that Christian women don’t value a man’s virginity. I’m just saying they value it in a more appropriate way than men do. Most women do not view a man through the lens of virginity like many men do to women. Because many men have idolized sex and made it their god, they place an overabundance of value on virginity. Obviously being a virgin is a good thing. But being a virgin does not mean you are pure in Christ and that you will be a great Christian spouse.

When someone repents of past sin and is covered by the blood of Jesus, God has made them pure, whether they are a virgin or not. And to be a great Christian spouse, you need to be a mature Christian. There are plenty of virgin high school students, for example, who are clearly not mature enough to be a great Christian spouse, so obviously virginity is the not the requirement to be a great spouse. Maturity in Christ is the key, and if God has sanctified and matured someone from their past life of sin, then that person is ready to be a great Christian spouse regardless if they are a virgin or not.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#355
#355
2. Christians Are Afraid to Confront Bad Preaching About Female Purity, Especially at Youth Group

3. There’s a Double Standard Because Common Christian Dating Advice Gives All the Power to Men When Initiating a Relationship

4. Because Christian Women Are Not Correcting Their Brothers Who Have a Double Standard

5. Because Men Who Do Not Have a Double-Standard Are Not Holding Their Brothers Accountable Who Do Have a Double-Standard

source as above
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#358
Mar 13, 2014
41,301
16,296
113
69
Tennessee
#358
SophieT said:
2. Christians Are Afraid to Confront Bad Preaching About Female Purity, Especially at Youth Group

3. There’s a Double Standard Because Common Christian Dating Advice Gives All the Power to Men When Initiating a Relationship

4. Because Christian Women Are Not Correcting Their Brothers Who Have a Double Standard

5. Because Men Who Do Not Have a Double-Standard Are Not Holding Their Brothers Accountable Who Do Have a Double-Standard

source as above
Click to expand...
Not sure what this has to do with beets.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#360
#360
actually I really like beets...the greens when cooked are better than spinach

I love vegetables
 
You must log in or register to reply here.