Social organiser

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Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#1
Is this you or do you let someone else take on this role
Do you like doing it or would you just rather it was all organised (and paid for) by someone else? what social events do you like to organise, if you do them?

It is a lot - parties, events, get togethers, dates, shopping for food, organising catering, decorations, outfits, photography, activities, workshops, classes, meetings, icebreakers, networking, birthdays, funerals, weddings...trips, outings, dinners, lunches, venue bookings, transport, tickets, write ups about the event, quizzes, dances, sports tournaments, galas, parades, bbq, gig, invitations...


Its exhausting really, to think about having a 'social life' after the pandemic although its part of being human I guess, to meet each other.

I dunno...I mean if you get a bunch of CCers together, what exactly are we gonna do? Stare at our smartphones and send messages to each other? How boring...

I was thinking of doing an escape room thing. It would be like Paul being locked in jail and figuring out how to get out, except you are locked in church building and have to figure out, using only the clues in Bible, how to break free
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,313
16,301
113
69
Tennessee
#2
g...

I was thinking of doing an escape room thing. It would be like Paul being locked in jail and figuring out how to get out, except you are locked in church building and have to figure out, using only the clues in Bible, how to break free
Very interesting concept.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#3
I dunno...I mean if you get a bunch of CCers together, what exactly are we gonna do? Stare at our smartphones and send messages to each other? How boring...

I was thinking of doing an escape room thing. It would be like Paul being locked in jail and figuring out how to get out, except you are locked in church building and have to figure out, using only the clues in Bible, how to break free
Yeah we've already got that covered. A few of us long-time CCers have been in a chat room for a good few years now and we decided to have a meetup. (Actually we started planning it TWO YEARS AGO, but then covid hit.) We're gonna hit an escape room, make banana bread, hit the redneck comedy bus tour, make chocolate chip cookies, see an aquarium, grill burgers, go on a hike to a pretty waterfall, play some games, make a pot of chili...

Notice the emphasis on food? :p

At the end of April we'll let you know how it went.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,943
4,585
113
#4
Is this you or do you let someone else take on this role
Do you like doing it or would you just rather it was all organised (and paid for) by someone else? what social events do you like to organise, if you do them?

It is a lot - parties, events, get togethers, dates, shopping for food, organising catering, decorations, outfits, photography, activities, workshops, classes, meetings, icebreakers, networking, birthdays, funerals, weddings...trips, outings, dinners, lunches, venue bookings, transport, tickets, write ups about the event, quizzes, dances, sports tournaments, galas, parades, bbq, gig, invitations...


Its exhausting really, to think about having a 'social life' after the pandemic although its part of being human I guess, to meet each other.

I dunno...I mean if you get a bunch of CCers together, what exactly are we gonna do? Stare at our smartphones and send messages to each other? How boring...

I was thinking of doing an escape room thing. It would be like Paul being locked in jail and figuring out how to get out, except you are locked in church building and have to figure out, using only the clues in Bible, how to break free
Yeah we've already got that covered. A few of us long-time CCers have been in a chat room for a good few years now and we decided to have a meetup. (Actually we started planning it TWO YEARS AGO, but then covid hit.) We're gonna hit an escape room, make banana bread, hit the redneck comedy bus tour, make chocolate chip cookies, see an aquarium, grill burgers, go on a hike to a pretty waterfall, play some games, make a pot of chili...

Notice the emphasis on food? :p

At the end of April we'll let you know how it went.
Believe it or not, several years ago, there was talk of an official CC-wide meetup. I can't remember exactly which year -- I got here around 2009 so maybe it was in the next year or two after that. I hope any old, OLD time CC'ers will correct anything about it that my memory isn't getting right. Back then, the live chats were very active and the mods were talking about a 3-day meetup with things like a live praise and worship band. For whatever reasons, it fell through, and without the community we used to have in those live chats, I doubt anything like that will ever be put on the table again. Personally, I can't imagine the liability that could come from an event like that anyone. What if some people came just to stalk someone they were crushing on, etc.?

You are right, Lanolin, in that organizing a get-together, even a small one, is a huge ordeal. I've been to 2 "meetups" over the years and will be headed to a 3rd very soon. As Lynx said, they are a BEAR to plan, even in small numbers. Everything has to line up -- you have to find a time when everyone can get off work, has enough time to save up the money, is able to travel, and then coordinate how you will share and manage food and entertainment costs so that everyone doesn't go broke. Covid definitely broke our stride for a while, as every state here in the US seemed to have its own set of rules, and some states/airports were requiring tests and vaccinations.

The other thing is that the very rapport it took to even think about discussing a meetup usually takes years. I've known Lynx since around 2014, so it's not something that happens overnight. I know a lot of people come to the site and ask, "Why can't I find any friends?", and all I can say is that in my experience, it takes MASS amounts of work and time. This is just my experience, but if one really wants to make friends, they will basically have to substitute at least one hobby's worth of time (like gaming or watching TV) for writing/communicating with people here on this forum. I've met a lot of people here by posting and answering a lot of threads, then got to know people individually through countless hours of PM's and chats. It's a very slow process that I know most people would feel they don't have the time for. Life ebbs and flows -- and most of the time, those I met and I were in each other's lives for a short time and a season -- but I'm very thankful to have found a handful of people who seem to be part of a very long (hopefully indefinite) season of my life.

The length of time that people have known each other can be important for everyone's safety. Our group is lucky because almost everyone has met someone else in the group in person already, so it really is like old friends meeting, rather than a group of strangers. We're also not worried about anyone being stalked, harassed, or acting up.

The other thing that seems crucial is that you get a group of people who are looking out for other people and not just their own needs or wants. One of the things I've enjoyed about the group I'm a part of is that everyone is concerned about each other's welfare and not just their own. Some of the big discussions we've had in order to set up a meeting include allergies, sensitivities, different waking/sleeping schedules, and trying to choose enough things that will be of interest to everyone, even if everyone doesn't participate in everything. I also appreciate the care being given to introverted vs. extroverted personalities, and how some of us (including me) might need personal quiet and/or alone time without offending the rest of the group. We are also all putting in our share of the costs and looking out for each other. No one will be left holding the bag, nor will they be left out.

One thing I can say is that I've NEVER been bored at a meetup. At the first one I attended, we scoured a huge shopping mall (we didn't really do any shopping, but it sure was fun to look, as they had stores I'd never been to before,) went to see Les Miserables, investigated local antique shops, took turns cooking for each other, prayed together, and played board games together every evening (which turned out to be my favorite part.)

At the last meetup I went to, we went to an awesome apple orchard, a historical mansion, and I got to spend time helping a few CC friends with their business right before the busy season (having been in retail all my life, I had an idea of what they were up against.) The things they needed done just happened to be one of my favorite kinds of work, and because I'm very task-oriented, it was pure joy to me to see all our hard work pile up everyday in a series of completed orders.

I've also met a few other CC'ers in one-to-one "meetups" and I've been very lucky -- everyone has been wonderful and a joy to meet. And we were never bored (well at least I wasn't, maybe the other person was!), nor did the conversations ever lag.

One of the best things about meeting CC friends is talking to them about their own walks of faith and experiences. Cinder somehow got roped into accepting a visit from me twice in less than 6 months, and one of my favorite memories from that time was sitting and talking about her experiences in mission work around the world vs. how Christianity is defined by the churches we grew up in.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that just the friendships themselves, let alone a meetup that might follow, take a ton of time and effort to build, and there's no shortcut (at least that I know of) or easy way around that.

But what if God brings it all together and it actually does happen?

So far I have to say that it is very well more than worth it.

And seeing as none of us are getting any younger, we have even talked about someday moving closer to each other to form our own little singles network that would help look after on another in our everyday lives.

In the meantime, we'll see what God has planned. :cool:
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#5
wow
well if geography werent an issue, and money no object I would get on that ark in a heartbeat

I have met some people in person online but it was very rare that they would visit NZ! I remember being in a group (before I was christian) that was like a fan club ad we would also write to each other and post each other things. But that was only one on one meetings Id see the odd one in person. There were also group chats. I dont go on group chats on here cos my tech doesnt suit it. But maybe we could do a zoom meet. Though the thing I find with zoom meets is they cant be too big or go on for too long. I cant sit for that long! And everyone needs a chance to interact with each other, not just one person takes over the whole proceedings.

I remember going to church and disappointed that the camps and gatherings were either superficial, or womens only, or childrens only...or not even doable. The few ones I have been on were a bit cliquey and one i had organised was a bit of a headache because one lady was bossing everyone else around on her ideas of what everyone else should be doing (for her) ..there is always one person who does that!

Im more like...I can get everyone together, but I cant do EVERYTHING as a hostess. everyone can bring something to the party, or if they cant bring things they can help out. Also, I cannot provide transport for everyone, but people DO need to find buddies that they can go with, or get a ride from. Its very sad for someone to miss out just cos they cant even get there.

For me it is also friendships that build up over time, but I think its important to connect with others without a big drama over what we all do, but we all get to choose at least something that appeals.

in terms of work its a bit funny because in my retail job we never got a break and the staff never got to see each other outside of work, the one time a staff member tried to organise a dinner half of us were off sick, and it just never happened.

I used to be part of a larger team in a public library and when I look back I was always organising social things, (we just had to make our own fun, nobody was going to do it for us) but now that I am in a team of ONE at school as the only librarian its kind of like, well its up to me, myself and I if I want to get people together and do team building amongst my pupils...have I forgotten how with covid lockdowns lol
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#6
Id like to know what God has planned cos...Im not THAT great at planning events and gatherings.

I notice some retirement villages are very social but for others all that socialising is anathema however, the thing is its all put on for them and they dont have to fret about who is going to be there and what time or how much it costs cos they just have a regular timetable of events and trips planned. why retirement villages well thats when people have enough leisure time to spend with each other, they dont have to walk far and they dont have to ring around asking everyone if they are free to do something. Which is what you have do when you are on your own and nobody is organising anything. Even if its a corner cafe that puts on a regular poetry night or a walking group or a ten pin bowling or art workshop or whatever.

not saying CCs are all going to retire in the same village but everyone does live somewhere and you need to make friends somehow! How can you do that if you dont ever go out and see anyone or do any activites together. ?!
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
5,612
2,203
113
#7
As someone who has hosted just such events...met dozens and dozens of people from online...

It's always a surprise to meet people in person who have been typing messages and talking on the phone with you.

Kinda backwards from how it's normally done. But it's fun just the same.

Those who put on airs, aren't exactly the most truthful, or whatever get discovered pretty quickly at a meet up. But I will say that it's always fun.

People are funny....to say the least. But when the guitars come out...we always are unified...with our singing.
Which happens to be my favorite thing about when people get together.

We plan out usually a huge grill out or barbecue in the park that has a campground near...because some prefer it to hotels. And there usually is a hotel in the area. I've had full couches before too. Someone packs in firewood and it turns into a late night bonfire in the barbecue grill.

Games and fun activities are usually assigned to someone. Doesn't matter what we do...we figure out quick we all have the same Father and the fellowship flows. A non-denominational church service in the park is held...and then a powerful and mighty prayer of Thanksgiving...and it's powerful because we agree with the one leading. And we have all become united by a bit of fellowship. And none of us feel so alone anymore...even though the miles separate us.
I'm married these days....different than when I did this before. But those memories are wonderful memories that I cherish to this day.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#8
As someone who has hosted just such events...met dozens and dozens of people from online...

It's always a surprise to meet people in person who have been typing messages and talking on the phone with you.

Kinda backwards from how it's normally done. But it's fun just the same.

Those who put on airs, aren't exactly the most truthful, or whatever get discovered pretty quickly at a meet up. But I will say that it's always fun.

People are funny....to say the least. But when the guitars come out...we always are unified...with our singing.
Which happens to be my favorite thing about when people get together.

We plan out usually a huge grill out or barbecue in the park that has a campground near...because some prefer it to hotels. And there usually is a hotel in the area. I've had full couches before too. Someone packs in firewood and it turns into a late night bonfire in the barbecue grill.

Games and fun activities are usually assigned to someone. Doesn't matter what we do...we figure out quick we all have the same Father and the fellowship flows. A non-denominational church service in the park is held...and then a powerful and mighty prayer of Thanksgiving...and it's powerful because we agree with the one leading. And we have all become united by a bit of fellowship. And none of us feel so alone anymore...even though the miles separate us.
I'm married these days....different than when I did this before. But those memories are wonderful memories that I cherish to this day.
I wish the "friendly" reaction wasn't a heart... I guess I'll have to go with "winner."
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#9
I think a bbq or picnic outdoors is good rather than a sit down meal inside because children can go and its less formal

I dont know about 'those who put on airs' what does that even mean. I just came across that phrase in a book and seems very oldfashioned...do people still do that?!

everyone on here is a real person, why would someone pretend to be someone they not. I dont get that. rich or poor, we all christians. I think in some circles, its very divided, Ive noticed the wealthier people are, the less they understand about the struggles poorer people have, even though thy might have endured poverty themselves in their lives. But they had a helping hand or an opportunity where someone took a chance on them, so if they not willing to reciprocate and think its all on them (like charging ppl for tickets) I guess they need to think again.

Jesus said when putting on a party invite those who cant afford to put one on themselves...and you will be blessed.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#10
I dont know about 'those who put on airs' what does that even mean. I just came across that phrase in a book and seems very oldfashioned...do people still do that?!

everyone on here is a real person, why would someone pretend to be someone they not. I dont get that. rich or poor, we all christians.
Uh...

...

...

Who's going to break it to her? It won't be me. I just don't have the heart.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
5,612
2,203
113
#11
Uh...

...

...

Who's going to break it to her? It won't be me. I just don't have the heart.
I ran across this same sentiment about a year ago. It was shocking to say the least. They were completely baffled by my statement about masks.

Love is unmasking....1Corinthians 13.

Love cuts through such things...that and time. The mask wearer still believes it to be in place after a while...which is another mystery to me.
Don't they know those masks become invisible after a while. We can see right through them.

Yet another puzzle of the human psyche I'll never really understand.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#12
break what

lynx why do you always talk about me in the third person as if Im not even here. Hello?
its kinda weird..?

wolves in sheeps clothings are going to be found out, so if you talk trash about someone online that curse is just going to land right back to them anyway...God sees every word people write even though some have the good grace to just ignore a lot of it that dont make sense.

Jesus saw the woman at the well, he knew she had five husbands when she hadnt even told him. It was ok, he knew the truth and all she ever did, she didnt have to evade him

if someone pretends to be christian it soon becomes quite obvious by the way they act. You dont have to pretend to be a christian if you are really not. Just be honest. Some people are on the fence about God, that happens. some people doubt. thats also human too.

a meet up isnt about oh I have to find a christian spouse.,,thats not the purpose of it if thats what you are all thinking!
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#13
break what

lynx why do you always talk about me in the third person as if Im not even here. Hello?
its kinda weird..?
*shrug

Usually you just blithely ignore everything everyone says. I had written off any chance of a direct reply.

if someone pretends to be christian it soon becomes quite obvious by the way they act. You dont have to pretend to be a christian if you are really not. Just be honest. Some people are on the fence about God, that happens. some people doubt. thats also human too.
Doesn't that directly contradict the part you said earlier about everybody here being a real person?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#14
Id like to know what God has planned cos...Im not THAT great at planning events and gatherings.

I notice some retirement villages are very social but for others all that socialising is anathema however, the thing is its all put on for them and they dont have to fret about who is going to be there and what time or how much it costs cos they just have a regular timetable of events and trips planned. why retirement villages well thats when people have enough leisure time to spend with each other, they dont have to walk far and they dont have to ring around asking everyone if they are free to do something. Which is what you have do when you are on your own and nobody is organising anything. Even if its a corner cafe that puts on a regular poetry night or a walking group or a ten pin bowling or art workshop or whatever.

not saying CCs are all going to retire in the same village but everyone does live somewhere and you need to make friends somehow! How can you do that if you dont ever go out and see anyone or do any activites together. ?!
Actually... in a chat I'm a part of, they have mentioned often that we should all live in the same retirement community when we get older. :giggle:
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#15
Im doing an escape room next month put on by someone else
so might post how I find it
I managed to go because I won a voucher.
Im doing it with a friend

It is somewhere in town and you can choose different escape rooms, the one I chose was called Old school.

Im no stranger to schools obviously. They didnt have an 'escape church' option lol
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#16
im thinking of doing my regular quiet time at the library next sunday
If I go regularly with my friend and then gradually invite other ppl to join us

its just the whole mask thing in indoor public spaces thats putting me off. But then we arent going to be talking much... maybe am just conserving my energy

I had lots of outings during school holidays so that has consumed a bit of gas
but staying anywhere overnight requires planning
and putting events on for the community hasnt happened this year, but now restrictions has eased it looks like things can go ahead

I get that thing in the back of my mind when I havent seen anyone for a while when have promised I would and I dont like going back on word but some people you kind of have to just set the date and say be there or be square.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#17
well life is back to semi-normal...

I pace myself and. just do what I can

This includes stuff like going to church regularly, quiz nites, (I dont have to organise anything...I just go to something already organised) a night concert in town, dance recitals etc

But have managed to organise - a flower foraging night, a garden club visit, storytelling and drumming sessions in the library...weekly pizza lunch, birthday outings, library visits

so..I havent turned into a hermit after covid after all. --I think people are more accepting if you can or cant make events --but the next big thing is going to be the end of year library party that two girls are organising for their book loving friends....we had no end of year party last year, nobody was really allowed to see each other - so it will make a change and I think the children really look forward to those times when they can enjoy themselves and direct their own fun activities rather than have it all planned and timetabled for them by adults.

am doing a garden ramble tomorrow then was asked to have my garden included in my clubs ramble - and then anothers having a bbq..so things are picking up, but everything I do is local

if peeps want to visit me I cant put them up but will offer to show guests/visitors around. It just weird that nobodys really been able to come from overseas or even out of town for a while and now you can be a tourist again.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
#18
ok end of year party done...pizzas done, library party done, camp done..tomorrow is..staff end of year party and pools

and wrapping up the library.

arrgh Lord give me strength its just one more day

and then next Tuesday graduation/farewell to Primary school!! After that its Christmas and the another summer gathering, which I have to remember to pay for


Remember for the past, what, 3 years could not even have parties like this thanks to covid.