my marriage is ruined

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flowerof3

Senior Member
May 1, 2011
864
10
0
#1
yes my marriage is basically over, my husband is waiting on an apartment . he says he can't take it anymore , he's not going to change and doesn't want to change, he is who he is. last night i was so angry and hurt that i broke a glass vase and actually picked up a coffee table and threw it into the wall breaking it. i have never felt that kind of anger and i don't like confrontation i would have never thought in a million years that i would feel that kind of anger. i've done everything i could to be a good wife and mother and look where its gotten me. he says i'm a good wife , he's just a bad husband and that he's not the man i was supposed to marry. he says there is a man in the church that i go to thats meant for me. this is very hard for me we have been together over 20 years, i feel numb, scared,anger, lost, saddened, not wanted, shocked, vexed,abandoned, unpretty, old, used up, non important , just a waste and i can't control whats going on. i really need all the prayers that are out there. i feel like i'm up against the devil alone and he's winning and is happy.

*i don't know what to do

flowerof3
 
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sugaroso

Guest
#2
If you've come boldly before the Lord, taking a good hard look at yourself first, stood against Satan by speaking out loud to him in the Name of Jesus and commanding him to take his hands off your marriage, husband etc, then whats left is your reliance on the Lord. Speak out against any spiritual attack and command it to stop. Speak to the spirit of fear, confusion etc and plead the blood. Our greatest battles are often times fought on our knees. I've learned the hard way that I can only control that which is within about a one inch radius of me. You have to keep your self strong with the Lord and know that anything that comes your way, you will overcome through his strength. Anything. Take lots of deep breaths and give your husband whatever space he needs. Apologize to him and the Lord for that bout of anger and come clean if this isn't the first time. Burrow yourself in the Word and His peace will overcome you. It really will. This is not the end of your life. It may be a new beginning, with or without him.
 

Timofree

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2011
730
18
0
#3
Can't begin to understand what your going through.........but thank God, we both serve the miracle working Creator of the universe. Who loves us as beloved children, in whom He is well pleased! Even though it doesn't always feel like that........anyway, praying, God Bless
 
T

trout

Guest
#4
Flowerof3 I understand some of your pain. Sister your not alone right now, God and I will STAND with you in this time. I too have felt the punishment of the other spouse as well.Main thing to do is do some heavy praying for yourself and look out for your own heart. The devil wont win because if God is for YOU who can be against YOU? He will bind up your wounds and heal the broken hearted, he did it for me. If you want this marriage restored then maybe God will speak into his heart, but you must ask in prayer. If he doesnt change, then it's not your fault. Im always here if you need someone to talk to. God Be With You Always.
 
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TDWP22

Guest
#5
yes my marriage is basically over, my husband is waiting on an apartment . he says he can't take it anymore , he's not going to change and doesn't want to change, he is who he is. last night i was so angry and hurt that i broke a glass vase and actually picked up a coffee table and threw it into the wall breaking it. i have never felt that kind of anger and i don't like confrontation i would have never thought in a million years that i would feel that kind of anger. i've done everything i could to be a good wife and mother and look where its gotten me. he says i'm a good wife , he's just a bad husband and that he's not the man i was supposed to marry. he says there is a man in the church that i go to thats meant for me. this is very hard for me we have been together over 20 years, i feel numb, scared,anger, lost, saddened, not wanted, shocked, vexed,abandoned, unpretty, old, used up, non important , just a waste and i can't control whats going on. i really need all the prayers that are out there. i feel like i'm up against the devil alone and he's winning and is happy.

*i don't know what to do

flowerof3
FIND OUT THE SOURCE...PRAY FOR GOD TO SHOW IT TO YOU AND HELP YOU FIX IT
 

Adrianv125

Senior Member
Jan 17, 2011
567
11
0
#6
Sister, it is natural that you are going under a lot of pain and suffering and confusion. I can't put myself in your shoes, but I do know one thing. We must set our priorities straight in every situation. If any human being wants to live a life that is meaningful and take that light yolk that Jesus said He gives to everyone along with His peace we must first put Him in first place of our lives. When He is in that first place we understand that any situation in our lives, be it good or bad, it comes from Him and it happens because He wants to glorify Himself in us, but this only happens if we are truly living for His glory. In second place we must put everyone else. Even our Lord Jesus Christ did this. When He washed His disciples feet He did something that only the lowest of slaves did, showing to all that He came to be a servant, thus we must also have that same humility. Lastly we must put ourselves in third place, because if we have already been bought by the blood of Christ and have been sealed by the Holy Spirit that assures us eternal life, then we must live for God and to show the love of Christ to the entire world. Our problems and worries and pains must be laid down on the feet of Christ. Our promises are not here in this life, but in the next. We are promised eternal life with Him, where there will be no suffering, hunger, or any evil thing. We truly are not exempt from disease, and pain, and suffering in this life. Jesus promised that we would be hated by this world, because it first hated Him. And a servant is not above His master. So sister, lay your worries down, even if they are piled up high as a mountain, just remember that we do not have a high priest who doesn't understand us, but that was tested and tempted in every manner but never once sinned

God bless you!
 
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depressed_angel

Guest
#7
First of all you should know you ARE loved by many people,and you ARE pretty...I can't possibly say I know what it's like to be in your situation but you have to understand that things WILL get better. As bad as it seems right now it's not the end of the world, even if it feels like it...You know sometimes God puts us in challenges to test us...God loves you very much and He knows your hurting but you got to keep your Faith strong and Believe things will get better just keep praying...You know God may have put him in your life as a blessing so you can have the wonderful children you have...And the Devil knows He can NEVER win against God,God is ALMIGHTY and the Devil knows this; that's why he is afraid of Him and trys to mess with the Children of God...but if you keep strong and show the Devil that you are Gods and Gods Alone and nothing will stand in the way of changing that and keep your faith and stay positive then the Devil knows he can't win...What can not brake us will only make us stronger in life...My prayers are with you and your Children...Godbless I pray things will get better for you soon.

~D-A~
 

pickles

Senior Member
Apr 20, 2009
14,440
147
0
#8
Praying for you and Husband and all that is given in Jesus Christ is Lord .
That Jesus will bring the comfort, peace and love you need.
That Jesus will bring salvation and healing to your husband.
For your children that Jesus will bring all comfort to them.

Huge hugs and God bless.
pickles
 
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debbie0220

Guest
#9
I'm so sorry to hear about what you have been going through. Has anything changed. Don't be tough on yourself or your morale. I pray that your husband will wake up before it is too late. The Lord will be with you no matter what. I pray that things go well. God Bless You.
 
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Sunshine_Girl

Guest
#10
I'm so sorry, honey. I just want you to know how loved you are in the midst of this. Look at all of these people who are in your corner in this battle against attack! More importantly, the God of the Universe is holding you dearly. He has so much love and grace to speak to you in this...and in the outcome of this. There is hope...don't let go of it! We are all covering you and your husband in prayer. Love you.
 
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SolR90

Guest
#11
No words, no advice, no scripture, no anything can take away the pain you feel. But where there is God, there is hope. Don't give up just yet. God has a plan in the works for you and your husband. PRAY HARD !! Please take time to listen to "john waller-while i'm waiting". and listen to the words, be obident to Gods plant for you, he wants you to know that he is there and wants you to just hand over your situation to him... just let him be GOD.
 

Jordache

Senior Member
Mar 9, 2011
1,829
15
0
#12
You always have hope in the Lord. While I do not wish to say that the conflict in my marriage meazured the same as yours, I am very aware of that breaking point. My husband and I reached that point. He left our church because of issues with the pastor. He refuses to talk to people. He's been jobless and hasn't searched for two years. And the list goes on. I too have felt used. I have worked my butt off, put myself through school, and paid for our wedding in cash. But two things I've learned are that God is always bigger and has a plan, and we can only fix ourselves and do the best we can do. In the past month, after a huge blowout where I left work, ended up at the church, and sent a friend to go take my husband to the hospital, my husband is finally starting to make changes. God is always at work even when we can't see it. So I pray that the Lord will encourage you that He is still working and He has a plan, and that He would be your rock so that you can work on yourself and give your husbands issues to Him. Blessings!
 
A

AnandaHya

Guest
#13
Sounds like he might have had an affair or something that makes him feel guilty and not worthy of your love.

the question is does he still love you? If he does then you need to help him heal by telling him you forgive him and truly forgiving him in your heart of anything he might have done in the past that hurt you or your marriage.

You will have to pray and ask God for the words and wisdom to heal your marriage.

Dear Lord please with our Sister in her time of trouble and trials and give her the sight and wisdom to know what to do.Please guard her heart, soul and mind from the arrows of the Enemy. Allow her to get pass her hurt and anger and see YOUR plans and guidance for her life and that of her family. We ask you to bind any forces of darkness that may be working against this marriage and against the lives of all who have posted or read this thread. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
 
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momonamission

Guest
#14
Hi there, I just wanted you to know, that your not alone. When I was reading your post I felt like it was something that I had just written. I'm going through a very similar situation. I feel rejected, and ugly inside, like you. My husband says that I need someone else to make me happy. First of all, dont give up, fight for your marraige through prayer......remember God is on your side, keep praying, because with God All the things are possible. Hang in there
 
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jhspy1

Guest
#15
Were is our stregnth it is with God.
Isaiah 40:31

New International Version (NIV)


31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.



He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."



Have Hope in the Lord! Times may be tough but God is tougher.