Spiritual Battle

Hi! I'd appreciate your prayers for a situation I currently face. I'll try to summarize it all.

A couple years back I got a new job in a place I really never thought I'd be working. Actually, I was miserable most of the time and would have quit, except there was a co-worker there that it seemed like God wanted me to reach out to and share my faith with. So I stuck it out despite being miserable all the time.

There were many times I prayed hard before work and prepared myself with all kinds of Scriptures to share, and then somehow we would never cross paths that day or he would be absent for no apparent reason. I wasn't sure if it was God's way of choosing the right time for me or if it was Satan getting in the way. I figured it was God, since God is more powerful than Satan.

Anyway, over time we had many normal conversations about general things and walls really seemed to be coming down. Then, without a single day's warning, I was laid off and basically cut off from my co-worker completely. That was really hard, and I questioned God's purpose in it all.

However, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise because my new work schedule enabled me to visit my friend during work hours which he was fine with. Our relationship actually grew stronger since I lost my job! But still, I couldn't seem to get to the point of truly sharing my faith even though we talked about his background growing up in a church.

At the same time, I've noticed myself beginning to cover up my own beliefs in order to maintain the friendship. Only in conversation, but I've acted like I hold his same values, which I don't! Instead of being different, I've tried to make myself seem like the same kind of person he is.

I know this is a spiritual battle of some sort. It has been from the very beginning. But I'm struggling to know how to conquer this and really be a true witness, not a lukewarm one. Why am I so scared of losing my friendship, when I know his soul is in the balance? Why do I keep riding the fence in my speech and never get around to admitting I'm really a dedicated Christian who's given his life to Christ? What am I so afraid of...?

I could really use some prayer that Satan will be conquered in this situation, both in my heart and my friend's. Satan wants me to give in to ungodly suggestions from my friend, because he knows that would destroy my testimony. And deep down I'm afraid I'm weak enough to do that at some point...

Father God bless FenceMan, in this matter. In Jesus loving name, Amen!

it can often be hard to help someone else when our own closets
might need some more cleaning out...

This is very true. And I guess part of my frustration is my own slow pace of spiritual growth. But if someone seems ready to hear the Gospel now, but my own spiritual weakness gets in the way... What hope is there? By the time I have strengthened in my own relationship with God it might be too late. Of course, I know God knows all things and He has definitely been at work here. So I trust His timing. Still, I'm frustrated at my own wishy-washiness. Is that a word?

I've been to church forever, I've read the Bible many times, I pray often, and I have assurance of my own salvation. I've shared my faith before, but it was many years ago when I wasn't so timid. I don't have confidence in my own ability to share my faith clearly, but then maybe I'm just not relying on the Holy Spirit like I have to.

Lord, I pray for FenceMan to let go of all of his pride, to take a moment to really consider how You are his greatest friend, and to hold loosely to his friendship with this man. Give him the courage to boldly share his faith and be ready to let this friend go if this friend is going to pull him down into an ungodly lifestyle because You have many people in his city. Help him to remember his relationship to You is the most precious commodity. Thank You, Lord, that You are guiding him to righteousness in humility. In Christ's Name, Amen.