Do not fear, perhaps you have not been a Christian long, or you dont know how it is yet. Well i can tell you by experience dear sister, you are in the coolest family there ever will be. I backslid before, thought I wanted to fit in, and people always thought i was wierd or gay becuase i didnt want to talk about girls, and didnt like all the secular music. So for a while, i did what they wanted, and it put a whole in my heart. That was hard to mend. Still mending. But heres the reason it hurts more, IS becuase God loves us soooooooooooo much did you know that. He didnt give you that light to be ashamed. It grieves him when you think like that, but he knows were just flesh, so he loves us the same. Your going to heaven when you die, let them say what they want about you. The creater of the Whole universe lives inside of you. And he has called you before he created this world. Imagine if someone was shy to tell you of Christ, you would go to hell, never knowing this love you have now. Soon you will see, pray to God to give you revelation of who he is, and be proud of that light you have, thats your salvation. Thats eternal life inside of you, and that is the Power of God in you, its a gift. God want you to be proud he is your Father, and he wants you to not be ashamed at what he has given you. Think of it like this, if your child was ashamed of you when you went to visit her at school and just pretended you werent her mom, wouldnt that make you want to cry?? God has a heart, and he is grieved and it hurts him, he is all powerful、but he is love, that why he came to die for you. He want to be cool to you too. And hang out with you, and be a part of your life. Thats why he came to live with us. I hope this helps. We have all been there, think of his love, and you wont be ashamed.
