W
Gang,
Thanks for allowing me to be here and a part of the community. I'll keep this brief since I don't feel too well right now.
I'm a recovering alcoholic/addict that has been in and out of the rooms of AA for around 10 years. For some reason I've never been able to find a God that means something to me, that has a depth and weight in my life. I've been pretty much an atheist for the past five years, but a recent relapse and the despair I've been feeling have me wanting so badly to believe in the Christian God that I was exposed to as a kid. I'm so lonely and scared, I've been trying for so long to live by my own self-propulsion and it always ends up in disaster for me, not just with drinking/using but with relationships and keeping anyone in my life. I so badly need a power bigger than me by which I can live, I'm so tired of myself and all the pain I keep causing to those around me. I want to believe, I want it so bad.
Thanks for anyone listening,
Michael
Thanks for allowing me to be here and a part of the community. I'll keep this brief since I don't feel too well right now.
I'm a recovering alcoholic/addict that has been in and out of the rooms of AA for around 10 years. For some reason I've never been able to find a God that means something to me, that has a depth and weight in my life. I've been pretty much an atheist for the past five years, but a recent relapse and the despair I've been feeling have me wanting so badly to believe in the Christian God that I was exposed to as a kid. I'm so lonely and scared, I've been trying for so long to live by my own self-propulsion and it always ends up in disaster for me, not just with drinking/using but with relationships and keeping anyone in my life. I so badly need a power bigger than me by which I can live, I'm so tired of myself and all the pain I keep causing to those around me. I want to believe, I want it so bad.
Thanks for anyone listening,
Michael