A question about adultery

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Jun 20, 2022
6,460
1,330
113
#61
I don't want Christians to fall into the same trap I did. The peak time for your sexual desires are from your late teens to early 30's, sometimes 40's. Once these desires lessen, they don't come back. This was GOD's plan to bring couples together. This is why at the time of Jesus people married young, to control those desires. You chose who you marry, make a wise choice. Do not believe Pastors who tell you to wait on GOD's choice. GOD does not choose for you.
I do hope God sends that One that You can't live without while upon Earth!
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#62
Also just because two people are Christians does not mean they are a match. You look for personality and attitudes differences. What if the person you want to marry thinks it's funny to fart and pick their nose at the dinner table? It's not a sin and they are still a Christian. Look at family members too. You are marrying into the family. Do they have a crazy relatives that likes to get drunk and fire their guns at family gatherings? Do they have a brother or sister who is a drug dealer or likes to steal things. Would your spouse back them before backing you? Because they are family.
 

Diakonos

Well-known member
Jan 19, 2019
1,377
432
83
30
Anacortes, WA
#63
I have heard some say, when the woman was caught in adultery, if they had brought out the man too, Jesus would have applied the law to both of them.
You know what's pretty neat?... Jesus caused all the Pharisees to leave so that there were no longer "two or more witnesses" to condemn the woman. Jesus was able to keep the Law AND show grace simultaneously <3
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#64
Also listen to family and friends who might see things you don't. At least weigh out their advice. I've had friends who refused to listen to Pastors, family or friends. They thought GOD would fix the problems after they got married. GOD will NOT fix the problems. You made a choice, GOD will honor it. Marriage can be tough, know what you're willing to accept.
 

Ted01

Well-known member
May 14, 2022
1,055
447
83
#65
Also listen to family and friends who might see things you don't. At least weigh out their advice. I've had friends who refused to listen to Pastors, family or friends. They thought GOD would fix the problems after they got married. GOD will NOT fix the problems. You made a choice, GOD will honor it. Marriage can be tough, know what you're willing to accept.
It seems strange to me that you like/encourage counsel from others choosing a spouse, but you don't want to hear any counsel about "purity"?
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#66
It seems strange to me that you like/encourage counsel from others choosing a spouse, but you don't want to hear any counsel about "purity"?
Jesus and Paul were very clear. The purpose of marriage is to have sex. To have some controls on the desires. From I have seen the church will not preach this. They teach purity, something Jesus and Paul did not teach about getting married.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
15,682
5,573
113
62
#67
Jesus and Paul were very clear. The purpose of marriage is to have sex. To have some controls on the desires. From I have seen the church will not preach this. They teach purity, something Jesus and Paul did not teach about getting married.
The purpose of marriage and intimacy was to fill the earth with the image of God. To make it simply about sex is to make it about man's purposes, and not God's. All things are by Him, and through Him, and to Him. Marriage, like all things, was given to glorify God.
 

Ted01

Well-known member
May 14, 2022
1,055
447
83
#68
Jesus and Paul were very clear. The purpose of marriage is to have sex. To have some controls on the desires. From I have seen the church will not preach this. They teach purity, something Jesus and Paul did not teach about getting married.
Really John?
The purpose for marriage is to have sex.
You think that God's purpose for instituting marriage is for sex?
I don't believe that way either... I think that Jesus and Paul had similar ideas about a loving relationship. Anything that they spoke that had to do with sex and marriage, was primarily directed towards people who had a rather carnally minded way of looking at marriage.
But what do I know?
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#69
Really John?
The purpose for marriage is to have sex.
You think that God's purpose for instituting marriage is for sex?
I don't believe that way either... I think that Jesus and Paul had similar ideas about a loving relationship. Anything that they spoke that had to do with sex and marriage, was primarily directed towards people who had a rather carnally minded way of looking at marriage.
But what do I know?
" For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. " Genesis 2:24 ....that means having sex.

"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. "
Corinthians 7:9 that means having sex.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#70
The purpose of marriage and intimacy was to fill the earth with the image of God. To make it simply about sex is to make it about man's purposes, and not God's. All things are by Him, and through Him, and to Him. Marriage, like all things, was given to glorify God.
"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." 1 Corinthians 7:9

"Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.” Matthew 19:12

According to Jesus and Paul, the purpose of marriage is to have sex.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
56,740
26,619
113
#71
" For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his
wife; and they shall become one flesh. " Genesis 2:24 ....that means having sex.

"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. "
Corinthians 7:9 that means having sex.
The LORD God also said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make for him a suitable helper.”

Genesis 2:18
identifies the primary purpose of marriage to be companionship.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
15,682
5,573
113
62
#72
"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." 1 Corinthians 7:9

"Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.” Matthew 19:12

According to Jesus and Paul, the purpose of marriage is to have sex.
Wrong. But the truth has been shared with you. If you want to believe something different and misapply verses to do so, don't be surprised at the way things work out. At least prayerfully consider what has been shared.
 

Ted01

Well-known member
May 14, 2022
1,055
447
83
#73
" For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. " Genesis 2:24 ....that means having sex.

"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. "
Corinthians 7:9 that means having sex.
Paul said that husbands ought to love their wives as Christ loved the Church (and vice versa)... so do you think that Jesus has sexual intercourse with us?

John, I get that you have strong desires... I do too... but that's not truly loving, in any real sense.

I don't want to mean... but do you suppose that your female friends in RL kinda' suspect that your primary motive in getting married (to them, maybe?) would be all about sex? Could this be why you aren't married?
Just askin'
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#74
Paul said that husbands ought to love their wives as Christ loved the Church (and vice versa)... so do you think that Jesus has sexual intercourse with us?

John, I get that you have strong desires... I do too... but that's not truly loving, in any real sense.

I don't want to mean... but do you suppose that your female friends in RL kinda' suspect that your primary motive in getting married (to them, maybe?) would be all about sex? Could this be why you aren't married?
Just askin'
I never lad them to believe that. I took my time when I was interested in someone. Maybe too long at time.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#75
Wrong. But the truth has been shared with you. If you want to believe something different and misapply verses to do so, don't be surprised at the way things work out. At least prayerfully consider what has been shared.
Where are the verses misapplied?
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#76
The LORD God also said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make for him a suitable helper.”

Genesis 2:18 identifies the primary purpose of marriage to be companionship.
He also said the two shall become one flesh....that means sex.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
15,682
5,573
113
62
#77
Where are the verses misapplied?
I took you back to the beginning and showed you what the original purpose was. I also reminded you that all things exist to glorify God. Making anything about mankind usurps its original design. Everything begins and ends with the glory of God. When this is so, our highest good is achieved.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
5,769
2,256
113
#78
" For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. " Genesis 2:24 ....that means having sex.

"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. "
Corinthians 7:9 that means having sex.
No...that doesn't mean sex.
Marriage is primarily for intimacy with another person and for the two to be united in purpose so much so that talking to one is like talking to the other. United you are more than the sum of your parts.

This means sharing EVERYTHING with the other person....goals, dreams, fears, wants, dislikes, loves....everything. Of course you share your body with the other person...with passion and relish.

Quit buying into this worldly message about things being sex driven. It's the tail wagging the dog.

My wife is a different person than I am...there are differences between us but none that matter. She has her strengths and I have mine. But hers are mine and mine are hers. We use them effectively in coordination to absolutely dominate any situation we feel the need to....especially when it comes time for worshipping God in some fashion.
 

Ted01

Well-known member
May 14, 2022
1,055
447
83
#79
I never lad them to believe that. I took my time when I was interested in someone. Maybe too long at time.
Sorry to hear that... I've missed opportunities at relationships before too. (Not just marriage). It's never fun...

Anyway, I hope that you're aware that in your postings here, you seem to "lead" people to believe that way? Are you not so open about these ideas of yours that you share here, as you are in RF?
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#80
Sorry to hear that... I've missed opportunities at relationships before too. (Not just marriage). It's never fun...

Anyway, I hope that you're aware that in your postings here, you seem to "lead" people to believe that way? Are you not so open about these ideas of yours that you share here, as you are in RF?
I am strongly against the purity movement. That movement does not discuss differences of attitude and personality. You can be as pure as you want, it will make no difference in the marriage. There is no promise from GOD that by following their rules he will bless your marriage or make it easier. Marriage is a crap shot. You better your odds by KNOWING more about the person and their family.