Interesting thread. From a biblical standpoint, a godly woman is one who, as a habit and way of life, seeks to figure out, and do, all that God says on every issue. She is open to altering any, and all beliefs to fit with what the fullness of the word of God teaches on every single issue in life, and she habitually does what it takes to get everything that God may have said, may have done, and godly men and women said and did. She puts all the pieces together and does what god wants regardless of what men and women in their society believe. A godly man seeks out God, truth ... as a habit and way of life, and does the will of God, for himself, and by himself, regardless of the costs as well. No double standard here.
After that, since our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, she will care for her body. Meet it's needs, but she will also be in control over it, rule it, master it, because if she cannot master her will with regards to the bodies desires, and keep that in subjection, she will have other issues with that as well. He , or she who is faithful with a little will be faithful with much.
This brings us to 1 Cor 7. It is best if all men and women remain single, so as to assure undistracted devotion to God. HOWEVER, if you do not have control of your physical desires, and things are getting out of hand, AND YOU ARE IN DANGER OF COMMITTING FORNICATION, get married. That pretty much sums up the N.T. REASON(Singular) for seeking to get married. You might not have the "gift" of being single, you might have the gift of a lack of control in this area. One has a gift in this area, another in that ... if so, get married.
So here's the rub. Who should even date? The issue of defrauding comes to mind. If you do not have struggles in the area discussed throughout 1 Cor. 7 as the ONLY issue for which we should seek marriage, you are, according to Paul, best off not to go this way. Given that you are sexually bound to meeting every need or desire of the other party, and you can't even take time for prayer if BOTH OF YOU ARE NOT IN AGREEMENT, a lack of struggles in this area could make for BIG struggles in obedience to the command of God later on. If you get married, you will have troubles ... Oh, yes, and if you do not believe Paul has the Spirit of God on this matter, and that the Holy Spirit did not guide him to write all of the scriptures he wrote, then your New Testament just got a lot thinner. Exacto knife all of the stuff written by him out...
How do you find a man or woman who fits the bill of having these "desires", knowing they are at risk of these things, and lack control? My suggestion is to first be that person. If this is your area of giftedness, and you know it. Come to terms with it. You know God wants you to be equally yoked. That's not just having two oxen, in a team pulling together, that's two oxen of equal strength and abilities, pulling the same direction. That's what you are pursuing. But where to hunt for a suitable spouse when these desires are getting in the way?
My suggestion, in this day and age, is to do so in a bible study forum, or better yet, a bible study chat room. Not the "social forums" or chat rooms. Find someone you can see is a mature Christian according to God's standards in Hebrews (Assuming you are as well), and discuss bible issues together, go over the scriptures, make the foundation of your relationship seeking out Christ together. A bit of a warning here. Make sure they are single. A godly man or woman can be quite attractive to other godly men and women. This often leads to e-mails of bible studies, video chat with each other, meeting, dating ... and if you both understand that you have these struggles when you start, the natural progression usually occurs.
Just seek God together. Remember, if you have no issues with struggles, knowing the attraction that godly men and women tend to develop, it is best if you don't take this route as it often leads to meeting, and more.
Does this work? For the most part. there are those who are studying God / the scriptures for other reasons. That is what those in their group do, they were raised in a household where one or more of the parents was very godly and taught them well... but they do not cry out for the pure milk of the word as an infant cries out for milk ... they do it for other reasons.
Does it work? It did for me. I put God first. Took all of the physical areas that God gifted us with out of the way. Built a foundation on the word of God, let phileo love grow, and God handled the rest.
