could you please go into a little more detail, because though i have my own theories about that, i don't have anything conclusive, and would love a second or third opinion
Ok my brother. I apologize if I'm a bit wordy on the matter here but it's in response to a direct request so here we go and btw this is a very mainstream Protestant theological position on the matter:
The effort to discern between those things which are culturally and historically relative and those which are transcendent is in actuality engaged in by all Christians, in one way or another. At issue is only whether such discernment results from our likes and dislikes, our own cultural conditioning and prejudices, or whether it is the application of a clear principle that emerges from a proper understanding of the nature and purpose of Scripture.
Take, for example, the issue of head coverings we are discussing here in this thread. Most Christians have concluded that the “head covering” enjoined upon women during worship in the church in Corinth (1 Cor 11) is culturally relative, and its inspired authority is limited to that historical situation. Many of these same Christians have concluded, at the same time, that Paul’s instruction to these women to be silent in worship (1 Cor 14) is not culturally relative and is an authoritative word for all Christian women in all contexts of worship, both then and now.
On what basis is this distinction made? Arbitrariness in this critical and necessary area of biblical interpretation can to some extent be avoided when we recognize that there are different types of texts, and that these differences provide us with clues to discerning that which is relative to the situation and that which is authoritative for all time.
In an article in Essays on New Testament Christianity, S. Scott Bartchy gathers texts which deal directly or indirectly with the place and role of women in the ministry of Jesus and the early church into three broad categories: (1) normative (or instructive) texts, (2) descriptive texts and (3) problematic (or corrective) texts. These categories are extremely helpful for purposes of our discussion.
Instructive texts are those which declare the way things ought to be among the followers of Christ. They declare the vision or intention of the gospel without reference to particular problem situations. As such they transcend the contexts in which they are uttered and are normative for both individual and corporate Christian existence. The citation of Joel 2:28–32 in Peter’s Pentecost speech (Acts 2:17–21), stating that the Spirit of God was given to both men and women for proclaiming the good news, is such a text.
Descriptive texts describe practices or actions in the early churches without any commentary. The sense conveyed in such texts is that what is described is perfectly acceptable or normal. The writer does not question the practice but rather seems to assume it as appropriate. Thus Luke, in Acts 18:24–26, tells us that both Priscilla and Aquila instructed the learned Apollos in the Christian faith, and in Acts 21:9 mentions that the evangelist Philip had four daughters who were engaged in the prophetic ministry of the church. Women’s participation in ministry seems not to have been unusual.
Corrective texts are those which clearly deal with special situations or problems or misunderstandings in the Christian communities which are addressed as I have already noted in my previous post.
An important dimension of this threefold classification for the interpretation and understanding of a good number of our hard sayings is the matter of their interrelationships. If a corrective text’s admonition reflects the vision of the gospel articulated in instructive texts and is further confirmed by descriptive texts, then the particular teaching would undoubtedly be authoritative for the whole church in all times.
On the other hand, if an apostolic word addressed to a particular setting does not conform to the way things ought to be (as revealed in instructive texts) and the way things normally are (as revealed in descriptive texts), then the inspired, authoritative word may very well be intended to deal exclusively with a specific problem and thus be limited to that and similar problems.
The foregoing reflections on the nature, purpose and context of biblical texts provide the parameters to explore the hard sayings of Paul.
A good resource on this for more comprehensive study of biblical interpretation is 'How to Read the Bible for All Its Worth' by Gordon D. Fee and Douglas Stuart.