I went walking yesterday, in a place full of hills and climbing. At one point I was behind a father and young daughter - she was no more than 4 years old, and he held her hand tightly as they walked along over these bumps and hills. Her father always took the rockier ground and guided her small feet over the smoother terrain, holding her with complete confidence. She in turn walked confidently, taking every guidance from her father and she clearly had unfaltering trust in him and his direction.
They reached some steps and the father walked alongside them and once he reached the top he let go of her hand while she still had just a couple of steps to go. She had climbed the previous dozen steps with ease with the confidence holding her dad's hand gave her. As soon as he let go, she faltered. She hesitated, and I could see the doubt fill her young mind in that moment as she suddenly struggled to take the next step. She was looking at the step before her, one leg on it, the other waiting to move. She gave a half-hearted, fearful attempt at pushing her self up the step before looking up to her father again, who was standing just before her, arms outstretched, offering words of encouragement. She lingered still. She decided she couldn't do it alone, she needed his strength to pull her up that step. I could see that she was actually physically capable of making it up that step, as could her dad, but she couldn't see it She didn't believe it. Even though he was right there with her, without feeling his hand in hers she was frozen, stuck.
He took hold of her hand again and she instantly moved up the last two steps and continued on her way. All doubt was gone, all worries eased. She had his hand again and that was all she needed.
This little scenario I observed gave me two things to reflect on as I continued my own walk that afternoon. God is always with me, even when I'm not tuned into His presence, and feel as though I am walking or climbing alone. He is encouraging me always, and is aware of every step I take and every obstacle I face. He is in it all. That's when my faith really comes in, those times I don't feel Him so closely. I need to trust Him more deeply and believe that He is still giving me all the strength I need, even when I just can't feel it like I should.
The second thing I thought about, was how I am sometimes the opposite to this little girl. Instead of relying fully on my heavenly Father's guidance and looking to Him for reassurance an strength, I try to do things my own way and by my own merits - which are pretty feeble in comparison to all that God has for me. I rely too much on myself sometimes and forget that I have a heavenly Father waiting to give so much to me, and to use me and bless me through it. Too often I walk as if God isn't beside me at all, only inviting Him into situations I need help with, rather than engaging in Him through the whole journey.
Tonight I was feeling pretty anxious about going to church and some of the broken relationships I would have to face there, I have been feeling like I am unworthy to be there, in that place I used to call home. We sang "I'm not longer a slave to fear, I am a child of God" and I heard God saying to me "You are My child, the same as everyone else here, fear can't control you anymore. Don't let it stop you being here, where I want you to be." It's time I starting living my life out as a child of God, full of purpose and in complete surrender and reliance on God.
They reached some steps and the father walked alongside them and once he reached the top he let go of her hand while she still had just a couple of steps to go. She had climbed the previous dozen steps with ease with the confidence holding her dad's hand gave her. As soon as he let go, she faltered. She hesitated, and I could see the doubt fill her young mind in that moment as she suddenly struggled to take the next step. She was looking at the step before her, one leg on it, the other waiting to move. She gave a half-hearted, fearful attempt at pushing her self up the step before looking up to her father again, who was standing just before her, arms outstretched, offering words of encouragement. She lingered still. She decided she couldn't do it alone, she needed his strength to pull her up that step. I could see that she was actually physically capable of making it up that step, as could her dad, but she couldn't see it She didn't believe it. Even though he was right there with her, without feeling his hand in hers she was frozen, stuck.
He took hold of her hand again and she instantly moved up the last two steps and continued on her way. All doubt was gone, all worries eased. She had his hand again and that was all she needed.
This little scenario I observed gave me two things to reflect on as I continued my own walk that afternoon. God is always with me, even when I'm not tuned into His presence, and feel as though I am walking or climbing alone. He is encouraging me always, and is aware of every step I take and every obstacle I face. He is in it all. That's when my faith really comes in, those times I don't feel Him so closely. I need to trust Him more deeply and believe that He is still giving me all the strength I need, even when I just can't feel it like I should.
The second thing I thought about, was how I am sometimes the opposite to this little girl. Instead of relying fully on my heavenly Father's guidance and looking to Him for reassurance an strength, I try to do things my own way and by my own merits - which are pretty feeble in comparison to all that God has for me. I rely too much on myself sometimes and forget that I have a heavenly Father waiting to give so much to me, and to use me and bless me through it. Too often I walk as if God isn't beside me at all, only inviting Him into situations I need help with, rather than engaging in Him through the whole journey.
Tonight I was feeling pretty anxious about going to church and some of the broken relationships I would have to face there, I have been feeling like I am unworthy to be there, in that place I used to call home. We sang "I'm not longer a slave to fear, I am a child of God" and I heard God saying to me "You are My child, the same as everyone else here, fear can't control you anymore. Don't let it stop you being here, where I want you to be." It's time I starting living my life out as a child of God, full of purpose and in complete surrender and reliance on God.
