Does something feel funky to others too?

[ember]

There are too many novels written here

I cant find who said that Ember.

Sounds harsh

hi skylove

you can read that in post 35

again, I don't participate so much in the family forum (for one thing it is mainly about divorce it seems and marriage is work and committment and there really are not quick fixes other than deciding divorce is not an option LOL!)

 

[ember]

BTW. I've read your post twice now. Last night and this morning. Last night it was funny. Now that I have Funkytown doing a loop in my head, it's not quite as funny. I much prefer King Tut getting stuck in my head, but I can't dictate what song loops, unless I start singing Oscar Mayer jingles. Then those get stuck in my head for weeks. lol

haha...it's the 4th (happy 4th) have a hotdog...

 

[atwhatcost]

i am going apologize first, because i know this is all going to sound really harsh. and frankly, i didn't get enough sleep to post the 42366243 verses that are crashing into my head right now (maybe someone else will and help me) but my gut response to this is:

do you think that Jesus feels used by you?

because you were born already a "goner" because you inherited sin nature. it was because of God's love for you and me that He sent His son to die an agonizing death in obedience, after living a sinless life, all for us. and further, in His desire to cultivate a personal relationship with us, He left us with a Helper so that we would never be alone.

the answer for me? no, i may get impatient, frustrated, or disappointed by others who need help but make it hard for me to share it. but if there is one thing i WON'T feel, it is used. i'm sorry to say, but it really is that simple for me. there's a lot of stuff that i screw up, miss opportunities and completely blow. but every single day, about a twice a day i pray that God will use me to be a blessing for others. i know that it's what i'm partly here for: to serve, to love, to bear one another's burdens, and to grow more Christlike. this is yours and my calling as a Christian.

can we spend all our time only serving? of course not, we'd be all burned out and have nothing left to give. but that is why we have to discern when we need to share, give, serve, and when we need rest, fellowship or those things that give back to us as well.

i really wish i could tell you that i understand how you feel. but i don't. i've never viewed cc as a place for me to be "fed" and "nurtured" as much as a place where i thought i would serve others and be served as well. some of that time i spend serving are in those moments (or hours!!!) writing long posts and pouring my heart out, crying a little, even agonizing over someone's awful situation, even knowing that i might never hear from them again.

the fact is, part of my obedience in faith is knowing that my part might only be one tiny piece, a planting of a seed. a show of love where nothing but intolerance was shown. my piece or seed can be used by God and grown far beyond that. if i am really doing this for God, it means that i can accept the fact that i don't get to always know the outcome. so when someone comes to heart, or i visit back a thread where no update was, i sometimes will quietly pray, wonder or just be hopeful. i wish it was different. but what else can i do?

First, you have 42366243 verses running in your head? I envy you. I can't even memorize John 3:16 or Romans 8:28 without a cheat sheet. lol

(The angry face was just a joke. )

Second, Jesus is my cane, my crutch, and often my wheelchair. Sometimes he's my heart-lung machine. He wants me to use him, and I do. He doesn't tolerate use-once-than-throw-away though. So, I'm really saying I feel used and then thrown away, like a stick of gum that didn't even get chewed more than once before spit out.

And third, I think I see where we differ. It's not a bad thing. It's just different. I do come here to feed and be fed. I'm not able to go to church, so this is my "commune with the saints" time. With that, I admit, my frustration level ebbs and flows like a high tide in Fast-Forward sometimes.

Now, quick! Go get a nap, because it's hard to sleep when the fireworks are going off later tonight!

Happy Independence Day!

 

[gypsygirl]

I don't participate much in the family forums, but the sentence above hardly sounds like it is coming from a Christian

Sorry, you sound just as harsh and judgemental as you accuse others of being

Is there a reason you are trying to get an argument going?

do you know who was judged most harshly in the bible? or the sins that were punished at a higher standard?

among those in the "highest judged group" were those guilty of prideful displays of judgment and hypocrisy. those who were eager to identify themselves as moral, christian leaders but in fact, were using their positions to do great great damage and harm.

whenever i see christians gather and eagerly complain about those who aren't behaving enough like a christian, who are actually behaving like those who might be unsaved or perhaps "babies" in faith and indict them, judge and criticize, they damage much. they discourage people from coming here and getting help, they discourage others from opening up, and they damage our charter, which is to serve, and love, and be the light and truth in this dark world.

i'm quite surprised that it was my line that offended you so much. perhaps you need to read the posts that inspired those words. words that i stand by. well pretty much. this is the kind of prideful, inhosptiable, unloving and discouraging kind of talk and behavior that makes my heart break and loathe the fact that christians can do so much damage to the body that they claim to love and serve. and frankly, i don't how anyone isn't offended by it.

it doesn't mean i'm mad or don't love the folks here. there were several who participated in this thread whom i am friends with. but that doesn't mean i don't find this really upsetting.

and for the record, i blow it all the time too. and i really hope that when i'm spouting nonsense, one of my brothers or sisters comes to me and says, "Okay, wait a minute!?! c'mon gypsy! you're WRONG... " and shows me where i've gotten off track.

while my words may sound harsh to you, and maybe others, it's not intent to offend or indict. but to hold up a mirror. we're looking at this issue all wrong, in my opinion. and if you look at the body of my posts, you'll quite seldom this "strongly worded". but this is the kind of stuff that is really very damaging because it prevents us from doing what is perhaps among our most important callings --serving others, and sharing the gospel, loving those and taking care of His people.

in fact, it was Christ himself who said that if we wanted the world to believe and identify us as Christians, it would be my the manner in which we love them (john 13:35).

please go and read this whole thread again. ask yourself how we're doing, here, at loving those who come here? how is this thread serving to show the world who we are, and how we're accomplishing that edict, of loving those to show the world we are His?

 

[ember]

do you know who was judged most harshly in the bible? or the sins that were punished at a higher standard?

among those in the "highest judged group" were those guilty of prideful displays of judgment and hypocrisy. those who were eager to identify themselves as moral, christian leaders but in fact, were using their positions to do great great damage and harm.

whenever i see christians gather and eagerly complain about those who aren't behaving enough like a christian, who are actually behaving like those who might be unsaved or perhaps "babies" in faith and indict them, judge and criticize, they damage much. they discourage people from coming here and getting help, they discourage others from opening up, and they damage our charter, which is to serve, and love, and be the light and truth in this dark world.

i'm quite surprised that it was my line that offended you so much. perhaps you need to read the posts that inspired those words. words that i stand by. well pretty much. this is the kind of prideful, inhosptiable, unloving and discouraging kind of talk and behavior that makes my heart break and loathe the fact that christians can do so much damage to the body that they claim to love and serve. and frankly, i don't how anyone isn't offended by it.

it doesn't mean i'm mad or don't love the folks here. there were several who participated in this thread whom i am friends with. but that doesn't mean i don't find this really upsetting.

and for the record, i blow it all the time too. and i really hope that when i'm spouting nonsense, one of my brothers or sisters comes to me and says, "Okay, wait a minute!?! c'mon gypsy! you're WRONG... " and shows me where i've gotten off track.

while my words may sound harsh to you, and maybe others, it's not intent to offend or indict. but to hold up a mirror. we're looking at this issue all wrong, in my opinion. and if you look at the body of my posts, you'll quite seldom this "strongly worded". but this is the kind of stuff that is really very damaging because it prevents us from doing what is perhaps among our most important callings --serving others, and sharing the gospel, loving those and taking care of His people.

in fact, it was Christ himself who said that if we wanted the world to believe and identify us as Christians, it would be my the manner in which we love them (john 13:35).

please go and read this whole thread again. ask yourself how we're doing, here, at loving those who come here? how is this thread serving to show the world who we are, and how we're accomplishing that edict, of loving those to show the world we are His?

I do not buy into "I said it because someone in the Bible said it statements'

However, I'll make an exception here

What did Jesus say regarding how we should be towards other believers?

loathe them? love them? what?

seriously? you defend saying you loathe Christians? nothing more to say if that is your actual statment and not just blowing off some steam because they don't respond exactly like you do

at any rate, I didn't write the op but I understand where she is coming from and that does not mean I am taking sides...there is no side to be taken when someone expresses how they feel

 

[blue_ladybug]

Forgive me but golly...who wrote that sentence they loathe christians? There is no name on it Ember?

There are too many novels written here

I cant find who said that Ember.

Sounds harsh

It was in a post that gyspygirl made..

 

[gypsygirl]

First, you have 42366243 verses running in your head? I envy you. I can't even memorize John 3:16 or Romans 8:28 without a cheat sheet. lol

(The angry face was just a joke. )

Second, Jesus is my cane, my crutch, and often my wheelchair. Sometimes he's my heart-lung machine. He wants me to use him, and I do. He doesn't tolerate use-once-than-throw-away though. So, I'm really saying I feel used and then thrown away, like a stick of gum that didn't even get chewed more than once before spit out.

And third, I think I see where we differ. It's not a bad thing. It's just different. I do come here to feed and be fed. I'm not able to go to church, so this is my "commune with the saints" time. With that, I admit, my frustration level ebbs and flows like a high tide in Fast-Forward sometimes.

Now, quick! Go get a nap, because it's hard to sleep when the fireworks are going off later tonight!

Happy Independence Day!

well, technically, i don't have all of the verses, just bits and pieces flooding my mind.. and having massive conflicts as to which i want to say.

but in reality, i realize i have used strong words. and as you can imagine, i'm a strongly-opined woman, as yourself.

i don't want to offend, or indict either. but i will say, i struggle mightily when it feels like christians gather for the purpose of being upset about those who are needy, who are new in faith, who need our love and prayer, support and understanding.

frankly, i'm scared of the day that i find myself joking around about the "messy babies" who show up here. because the day i start doing that is a day i'm going to be a lot less useful to Him. that's speaking for myself.

anyway, please know, i am not trying to offend and so if words are harsh, please know they are only said with the depth of passion that i feel for these kinds of matters. : )

happy fourth, my sisters and brothers in Christ. ; ) oh, and sorry for crashing and thrashing your thread. : D

 

[atwhatcost]

I don't participate much in the family forums, but the sentence above hardly sounds like it is coming from a Christian

Sorry, you sound just as harsh and judgemental as you accuse others of being

Is there a reason you are trying to get an argument going?

Oh, but it really does. I've heard the same from you. You've heard the same from me. Kind of the reason we were on the outs for a while there. We really should be ashamed of ourselves more often, but it's just easier and quicker to fling that shame onto someone else.

How else can we judge without sounding judgmental? (And this from the OP who was wondering that too when I asked.)

The thing I hate about Gypsygirl's post is it's true... about me! Isn't it true about all of us?

 

[blue_ladybug]

Forgive me but golly...who wrote that sentence they loathe christians? There is no name on it Ember?

hi skylove

you can read that in post 35

again, I don't participate so much in the family forum (for one thing it is mainly about divorce it seems and marriage is work and committment and there really are not quick fixes other than deciding divorce is not an option LOL!)

I don't participate in alot of the forums here anymore. A couple of them are too uptight, snobbish and clique-y for my taste..

 

[ember]

Oh, but it really does. I've heard the same from you. You've heard the same from me. Kind of the reason we were on the outs for a while there. We really should be ashamed of ourselves more often, but it's just easier and quicker to fling that shame onto someone else.

How else can we judge without sounding judgmental? (And this from the OP who was wondering that too when I asked.)

The thing I hate about Gypsygirl's post is it's true... about me! Isn't it true about all of us?

I am coming from a different place than gypsygirl Mrs Cost...I hope you understand that and no I do not take that post of hers to heart for myself

and sorry but I don't know what you meant by 'oh but it really does'

I disagree with her post and the backpeddling...without prejudice because I hardly know the girl

 

[ember]

I don't participate in alot of the forums here anymore. A couple of them are too uptight, snobbish and clique-y for my taste..

do you mean the forums in general or just this section?

 

[atwhatcost]

do you know who was judged most harshly in the bible? or the sins that were punished at a higher standard?

among those in the "highest judged group" were those guilty of prideful displays of judgment and hypocrisy. those who were eager to identify themselves as moral, christian leaders but in fact, were using their positions to do great great damage and harm.

whenever i see christians gather and eagerly complain about those who aren't behaving enough like a christian, who are actually behaving like those who might be unsaved or perhaps "babies" in faith and indict them, judge and criticize, they damage much. they discourage people from coming here and getting help, they discourage others from opening up, and they damage our charter, which is to serve, and love, and be the light and truth in this dark world.

i'm quite surprised that it was my line that offended you so much. perhaps you need to read the posts that inspired those words. words that i stand by. well pretty much. this is the kind of prideful, inhosptiable, unloving and discouraging kind of talk and behavior that makes my heart break and loathe the fact that christians can do so much damage to the body that they claim to love and serve. and frankly, i don't how anyone isn't offended by it.

it doesn't mean i'm mad or don't love the folks here. there were several who participated in this thread whom i am friends with. but that doesn't mean i don't find this really upsetting.

and for the record, i blow it all the time too. and i really hope that when i'm spouting nonsense, one of my brothers or sisters comes to me and says, "Okay, wait a minute!?! c'mon gypsy! you're WRONG... " and shows me where i've gotten off track.

while my words may sound harsh to you, and maybe others, it's not intent to offend or indict. but to hold up a mirror. we're looking at this issue all wrong, in my opinion. and if you look at the body of my posts, you'll quite seldom this "strongly worded". but this is the kind of stuff that is really very damaging because it prevents us from doing what is perhaps among our most important callings --serving others, and sharing the gospel, loving those and taking care of His people.

in fact, it was Christ himself who said that if we wanted the world to believe and identify us as Christians, it would be my the manner in which we love them (john 13:35).

please go and read this whole thread again. ask yourself how we're doing, here, at loving those who come here? how is this thread serving to show the world who we are, and how we're accomplishing that edict, of loving those to show the world we are His?

Actually, the person who was judged the harshest was the innocent guy -- Jesus. (Blows my mind when I start thinking I'm judged wrong.)

 

[atwhatcost]

well, technically, i don't have all of the verses, just bits and pieces flooding my mind.. and having massive conflicts as to which i want to say.

but in reality, i realize i have used strong words. and as you can imagine, i'm a strongly-opined woman, as yourself.

i don't want to offend, or indict either. but i will say, i struggle mightily when it feels like christians gather for the purpose of being upset about those who are needy, who are new in faith, who need our love and prayer, support and understanding.

frankly, i'm scared of the day that i find myself joking around about the "messy babies" who show up here. because the day i start doing that is a day i'm going to be a lot less useful to Him. that's speaking for myself.

anyway, please know, i am not trying to offend and so if words are harsh, please know they are only said with the depth of passion that i feel for these kinds of matters. : )

happy fourth, my sisters and brothers in Christ. ; ) oh, and sorry for crashing and thrashing your thread. : D

May he or she who said "messy babies" be blessed with two dozen children. lol

 

[Dino246]

Wow, this is a great thread! And I'm not being sarcastic. It is good evidence of two things... how reading the original post, and all subsequent posts by the original poster, is important to get the gist, and, how wonderful it is that we are able to converse openly, honestly, and with some emotional involvement. Kudos to all! And Gypsygirl, I sincerely appreciate your clarity of thought.

As to feeling used, I don't, because it is a blessing to me simply to offer a thought or prayer on behalf of a hurting person. Having been through a painful marital breakup, I know how confused and angry I felt in the early days. I needed to vent (most of it was trash-talk) but getting it out helped me process it. Two years on, and I've repented of some of those early attitudes, but I think I needed to vent at the time. Just my experience.

Blessings,
Dino

 

[atwhatcost]

I am coming from a different place than gypsygirl Mrs Cost...I hope you understand that and no I do not take that post of hers to heart for myself

and sorry but I don't know what you meant by 'oh but it really does'

I disagree with her post and the backpeddling...without prejudice because I hardly know the girl

The "oh but it really does" from me comes from this in your post:

but the sentence above hardly sounds like it is coming from a Christian

And highly-opinionated person to highly-opinionated person, I suspect we don't know GypsyGirl that well because she's usually quieter than that. (I recognize her boots.) I just learned quiet people can be highly-opinionated too. Whoa! This comes as a surprise, since I have very little experience being quiet.
lol

But, can we just put to the side how she came off for a minute? I've been thinking what I wrote in the original post for a while now. I really did wonder if others thought it too. BUT I also posted it at the exact moment when that didn't happen for a while and when the ones who only posted "ONE post" hadn't been back for quite some time, so no one new would think I was talking about them. It really wasn't about any one person, just a trend I noticed even looking back through post written before I even knew this site existed.

Understand that much about how much I really didn't want to offend anyone, but I also thought this belonged on this board.

All that, and I really did get this wrong. I didn't expect this post to last long, it has, new folks have come along, and I'm sure, because they are new they have to think this site is inhospitable because of my post. THAT is wrong! THAT was me being a (insert vicious word, and I think my mind tops it on how I feel about myself now.) THAT was unGodly. THAT was unkind and unloving. You do see that, right?

Ain't we all who didn't say what Gypsygirl said? I was absolutely wrong and wish I could take this back 80% of the way.

The other 20% really was to get people to realize we're not just here to listen to their problems and then they can go on their merry way, because it's dumped and out of sight. I am sensitive toward others' problems, so I feel for these people long after reading the post. That's exactly why I had to get out of social services. I carry burdens too long. Can't give them up.

So, yes, if we aren't being cold, we're actng cold. Just because someone calls it other than those doing the acting, it doesn't make that person the bad guy.

Gypsygirl voiced what I've been worried about all along, and I really did see one person being a jackass on this thread. That's on me. I've got to do something better next time, but I don't know what.

 

[atwhatcost]

Wow, this is a great thread! And I'm not being sarcastic. It is good evidence of two things... how reading the original post, and all subsequent posts by the original poster, is important to get the gist, and, how wonderful it is that we are able to converse openly, honestly, and with some emotional involvement. Kudos to all! And Gypsygirl, I sincerely appreciate your clarity of thought.

As to feeling used, I don't, because it is a blessing to me simply to offer a thought or prayer on behalf of a hurting person. Having been through a painful marital breakup, I know how confused and angry I felt in the early days. I needed to vent (most of it was trash-talk) but getting it out helped me process it. Two years on, and I've repented of some of those early attitudes, but I think I needed to vent at the time. Just my experience.

Blessings,
Dino

I see you as "the prayerer." He who let's folks know you're praying for them. I didn't know why, until now. (Didn't think I needed to know either, so never asked. I just liked that you offered prayers.) So, now that I know why, doubly -- thank you for being the prayerer.

 

[Rosesrock]

The "oh but it really does" from me comes from this in your post:

And highly-opinionated person to highly-opinionated person, I suspect we don't know GypsyGirl that well because she's usually quieter than that. (I recognize her boots.) I just learned quiet people can be highly-opinionated too. Whoa! This comes as a surprise, since I have very little experience being quiet.
lol

But, can we just put to the side how she came off for a minute? I've been thinking what I wrote in the original post for a while now. I really did wonder if others thought it too. BUT I also posted it at the exact moment when that didn't happen for a while and when the ones who only posted "ONE post" hadn't been back for quite some time, so no one new would think I was talking about them. It really wasn't about any one person, just a trend I noticed even looking back through post written before I even knew this site existed.

Understand that much about how much I really didn't want to offend anyone, but I also thought this belonged on this board.

All that, and I really did get this wrong. I didn't expect this post to last long, it has, new folks have come along, and I'm sure, because they are new they have to think this site is inhospitable because of my post. THAT is wrong! THAT was me being a (insert vicious word, and I think my mind tops it on how I feel about myself now.) THAT was unGodly. THAT was unkind and unloving. You do see that, right?

Ain't we all who didn't say what Gypsygirl said? I was absolutely wrong and wish I could take this back 80% of the way.

The other 20% really was to get people to realize we're not just here to listen to their problems and then they can go on their merry way, because it's dumped and out of sight. I am sensitive toward others' problems, so I feel for these people long after reading the post. That's exactly why I had to get out of social services. I carry burdens too long. Can't give them up.

So, yes, if we aren't being cold, we're actng cold. Just because someone calls it other than those doing the acting, it doesn't make that person the bad guy.

Gypsygirl voiced what I've been worried about all along, and I really did see one person being a jackass on this thread. That's on me. I've got to do something better next time, but I don't know what.

Well ill praise god for whatever lesson you just learned. Communication is the key. Ive learned so much by reading, logging off and signing back in after regrouping my thoughts. What ive learned? I have to roll over what's in my head way longer than once thought, cause this opinionated chick, which may have good intensions, acts like the small voice of God with her passionate heart for people. Also,my motto for message boards is....if it's not profitable then hmmmmm dont post.
I occasionally buy into the lie of...well if they dont kbow what i mean that's on them...not true. Im responsible for me and what flies out my mouth in type.

 

[atwhatcost]

Well ill praise god for whatever lesson you just learned. Communication is the key. Ive learned so much by reading, logging off and signing back in after regrouping my thoughts. What ive learned? I have to roll over what's in my head way longer than once thought, cause this opinionated chick, which may have good intensions, acts like the small voice of God with her passionate heart for people. Also,my motto for message boards is....if it's not profitable then hmmmmm dont post.
I occasionally buy into the lie of...well if they dont kbow what i mean that's on them...not true. Im responsible for me and what flies out my mouth in type.

And I can't rep you for this?

Ah, nuts! So, yup ad amen!

 

[blue_ladybug]

do you mean the forums in general or just this section?

no, the forums in general. Not all, just some. But not this one. lol..

 

[ember]

The "oh but it really does" from me comes from this in your post:

And highly-opinionated person to highly-opinionated person, I suspect we don't know GypsyGirl that well because she's usually quieter than that. (I recognize her boots.) I just learned quiet people can be highly-opinionated too. Whoa! This comes as a surprise, since I have very little experience being quiet.
lol

But, can we just put to the side how she came off for a minute? I've been thinking what I wrote in the original post for a while now. I really did wonder if others thought it too. BUT I also posted it at the exact moment when that didn't happen for a while and when the ones who only posted "ONE post" hadn't been back for quite some time, so no one new would think I was talking about them. It really wasn't about any one person, just a trend I noticed even looking back through post written before I even knew this site existed.

Understand that much about how much I really didn't want to offend anyone, but I also thought this belonged on this board.

All that, and I really did get this wrong. I didn't expect this post to last long, it has, new folks have come along, and I'm sure, because they are new they have to think this site is inhospitable because of my post. THAT is wrong! THAT was me being a (insert vicious word, and I think my mind tops it on how I feel about myself now.) THAT was unGodly. THAT was unkind and unloving. You do see that, right?

Ain't we all who didn't say what Gypsygirl said? I was absolutely wrong and wish I could take this back 80% of the way.

The other 20% really was to get people to realize we're not just here to listen to their problems and then they can go on their merry way, because it's dumped and out of sight. I am sensitive toward others' problems, so I feel for these people long after reading the post. That's exactly why I had to get out of social services. I carry burdens too long. Can't give them up.

So, yes, if we aren't being cold, we're actng cold. Just because someone calls it other than those doing the acting, it doesn't make that person the bad guy.

Gypsygirl voiced what I've been worried about all along, and I really did see one person being a jackass on this thread. That's on me. I've got to do something better next time, but I don't know what.

well pardon, but that's an awful lot of stuff for me to digest since I really do not post here much

my original response was just an observation that many people want a quick fix and there is no quick fix for many things, marriage being one of those things (which I just added now)

I don't 'feel' the burden to agree or disagree here because the thread you started did not offend me and if you felt as you say, then why dismiss it because someone took exception to it?

I will never agree with a statement that voices hatred of Christians and I addressed gypsygirl on that and others chimed in

That's fine, but please I would hope that the way one person expresses themself does not somehow indicate the entire tenor of the thread

If you were worried about something voiced by gypsygirl, then settle it there.

I have really only responded here in a neutral way other then taking exception to that one remark

This is not a hill to die on IMO...I honestly never thought something wrong of your post one way or another and I am still not bothered by it

Please just take this at face value...not even opinions...I really don't have one in this thread!