The cost of marrying an undercover christian

[blue_ladybug]

Hey guys and girls, this post started off perfectly fine, until stones were being thrown around, dirty PM laundry was thrown out in the street and personal attacks were being aimed at real people with real issues.



Need I remind you ALL that we are all children of God here (hopefully)

Ephesians 4:31 and 5:2

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Is it so difficult to take the person who's aggravated you aside and talk like reasonable adults about it?

Come on this is not kindergarten.

tash, amen sister! Very well said! Some adults would just rather keep on acting like children, I guess.. I agree with ThePottersClay, what was said in a pm should not have been strewn about in a public thread. It should have been dealt with privately. I will re-iterate what tash said, and say......


​c'mon now people, this aint kindergarten!!!

 

[dabodab]

Hello,


I would like to express an apology to Angela53510 and secularhermit, and ask forgiveness for my behavior, which was disrespectful, disruptive, offensive, cruel, sarcastic...and yes probably a little paranoid...all of which had a sour affect. Pretty much everything I accused Angela53510 of.

I apologize also to those here who are supportive of these two users (people). It was obviously a harm to you, as well.

I wish to have used my 24 hour rule; wait 24 hours to respond when angry. As it was, that's about how much sleep I lost this weekend agonizing over this incident.

God doesn't want us fighting each other. He wants us fighting the good fight of faith! I'm so grateful to God for not giving up on me.

I'm humbled and relieved to be here apologizing. Thank you.

 

[proverbs35]

Hello,


I would like to express an apology to Angela53510 and secularhermit, and ask forgiveness for my behavior, which was disrespectful, disruptive, offensive, cruel, sarcastic...and yes probably a little paranoid...all of which had a sour affect. Pretty much everything I accused Angela53510 of.

I apologize also to those here who are supportive of these two users (people). It was obviously a harm to you, as well.

I wish to have used my 24 hour rule; wait 24 hours to respond when angry. As it was, that's about how much sleep I lost this weekend agonizing over this incident.

God doesn't want us fighting each other. He wants us fighting the good fight of faith! I'm so grateful to God for not giving up on me.

I'm humbled and relieved to be here apologizing. Thank you.

It takes a courageous person to sincerely apologize. Thank you.

 

[sunburn]

I took some times to ponder about what has just happened here.
I was angry and not prepared to listen to Angela and I apologise the way I reacted.
I thank you secular hermit for your apology.

Now shall I go back to the Original post?
To illustrate the point I was making on this thread with my first post, I noticed the thread regarding the wife who just discovered the husband was gay and going to a gay orgy…it is to me a perfect example of marrying an undercover christian.
Agree with it or not, these things happen and sometimes, those "christian" hide their true self quite well.
I don't mind when they are in the church wanting to be saved and are a work in progress and all, but when they embark, deceive someone in the journey of Marriage, the cost is unbearable and God wants us to be aware of these.

 

[dabodab]

I took some times to ponder about what has just happened here.
I was angry and not prepared to listen to Angela and I apologise the way I reacted.
I thank you secular hermit for your apology.

Now shall I go back to the Original post?
To illustrate the point I was making on this thread with my first post, I noticed the thread regarding the wife who just discovered the husband was gay and going to a gay orgy…it is to me a perfect example of marrying an undercover christian.
Agree with it or not, these things happen and sometimes, those "christian" hide their true self quite well.
I don't mind when they are in the church wanting to be saved and are a work in progress and all, but when they embark, deceive someone in the journey of Marriage, the cost is unbearable and God wants us to be aware of these.

What I hear you saying is that these undercover persons who call themselves 'Christians' aren't truly saved. That's a great question and, I'm afraid, one for the ages.

If you were to know my children's father today, you would meet a person who doesn't believe in God at all. However , when we were teenagers, he led me to salvation, purely based on his knowledge of scripture and his absolute love for God! I wanted what he had. Interestingly, he and I hooked up again five years later and immediately became engaged, even though we both saw red flags about not being super-compatible. However, we forged on anyways despite those, trusting God to take us to the finish line. I believe we put God to the test by getting married despite concerns. There's so much more to the demise of our marriage but you get the gist.

Then, 15 years later I married my best friend and boyfriend of 5 years knowing he had a drinking problem. I had one too but was delivered through the help of A.A. 9 months before we married. I knew better than to marry a daily drinker but I trusted in myself to deal with it. Thought I was strong. I didn't listen to my friends.

So, as I heard others say in that other thread, we also have work to do if we are to make choices based on God's best for us. Some are able to keep their private 'sin' business well hidden. But doesn't God know? Can we honestly say there was NO foreknowledge of a possible problem existing with sinful behavior before we married? God knew. No one else truly knows our hearts. However, I believe we can pay attention to that small still voice inside us, if we will foster that voice by believing it is the Spirit and obeying it.

We can learn from making poor choices, and move ahead asking God' discernment in all aspects of our lives. I'm so grateful God doesn't dismiss me when I trust in myself, instead of trusting Him!

 

[sunburn]

What I hear you saying is that these undercover persons who call themselves 'Christians' aren't truly saved. That's a great question and, I'm afraid, one for the ages.

If you were to know my children's father today, you would meet a person who doesn't believe in God at all. However , when we were teenagers, he led me to salvation, purely based on his knowledge of scripture and his absolute love for God! I wanted what he had. Interestingly, he and I hooked up again five years later and immediately became engaged, even though we both saw red flags about not being super-compatible. However, we forged on anyways despite those, trusting God to take us to the finish line. I believe we put God to the test by getting married despite concerns. There's so much more to the demise of our marriage but you get the gist.

Then, 15 years later I married my best friend and boyfriend of 5 years knowing he had a drinking problem. I had one too but was delivered through the help of A.A. 9 months before we married. I knew better than to marry a daily drinker but I trusted in myself to deal with it. Thought I was strong. I didn't listen to my friends.

So, as I heard others say in that other thread, we also have work to do if we are to make choices based on God's best for us. Some are able to keep their private 'sin' business well hidden. But doesn't God know? Can we honestly say there was NO foreknowledge of a possible problem existing with sinful behavior before we married? God knew. No one else truly knows our hearts. However, I believe we can pay attention to that small still voice inside us, if we will foster that voice by believing it is the Spirit and obeying it.

We can learn from making poor choices, and move ahead asking God' discernment in all aspects of our lives. I'm so grateful God doesn't dismiss me when I trust in myself, instead of trusting Him!

Dabodab, Based on your experiences, It's fair to say that you will not say that you were deceived by your husbands.or that they deceived you somehow. You knew you what you were up against from the get go…

I am putting an emphasis on deceit. deceiving the other partner, playing church and hiding their true self.
Not knowing thoroughly the person before getting involved with them is one of the mistake made in these situations I am talking about.

 

[Jeff_56]

not even close to true. this place is wide open for religious deceivers and perps.(ask any and all law enforcement agencies in the world, and most any administrators of any forum or chat room anywhere). kindergarten was (hopefully)(possibly anyway) a lot safer. (for those not is a heretical school -- for those in a heretical school(most on earth), their whole life is very dangerous and few are rescued.)

....Need I remind you ALL that we are all children of God here (hopefully) ........
Come on this is not kindergarten.