The difference between discipline and punishment

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
S

Sirk

Guest
#61
Thank you. And, my wife just read these last few posts. She tore me up!

She said.... "You're a therapist with a quarter of a century of experience, and you were stupid enough to use the inflammatory "YOU" word when discussing this kind of subject?

She's right. I just wasn't thinking of replying in clinical mode. I'm sorry.
ya. I try to stick to "I" statements as much as I can. I think we are trying to take care of both sides of the relationship when we don't.
 
S

Sirk

Guest
#62
ya. I try to stick to "I" statements as much as I can. I think we are trying to take care of both sides of the relationship when we don't.
I didn't mean to set myself above you Willie if that is what it felt like to you. I am no better and no worse and made some mistakes in this thread too.
 
K

Kaycie

Guest
#64
Very good. Punishment focuses on the one who was wronged- that they can get revenge and have their anger satisfied. But discipline focuses on the one who did the wrong- that they can be corrected, and change their thinking so that they may live and learn and make the correct choice next time. Usually punishment is carried out in a very short amount of time, whereas discipline requires more time and effort. As a parent you have to ask yourself, "How is this going to correct their thinking?" And you did a most wonderful job.
 
S

Sirk

Guest
#67
The fall was us separating from God Willie .And we're still doing it....but God keeps chasing us down time and time again. To me...that is the essence of the gospel. I really don't think we hold an opposing viewpoint on that....maybe I'm wrong about that and only you can say...but that is the message that my son received. Heck...I chased him down...just like God chases after me and I did it with love and care for his spirit just like God does for ours.
 
Jun 23, 2015
1,990
37
0
#68
I was raised with that guilt thing. I eventually learned better. I made sure I never taught such things. I made sure my kids knew that God NEVER separated Himself from them.... even before they accepted Christ. They understood that, just like A&E, it was US who perceived separation in our own minds. (God came looking for A&E... God talked with them... God clothed them... God even came to speak with their children outside the garden.) ALL OF THIS, AFTER THEY HAD SINNED.

It is a shame that some of us still continue to teach children that God will separate Himself from them if they do wrong.
Its a shame that you misinterpret Gods word.

Isaiah 59:2
But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, And your sins have hidden His face from you so that He does not hear.
 
Jun 23, 2015
1,990
37
0
#69
"For God so loved the (whole) world...."

".... in that while we were yet sinners, He sent His son...."

I'd say the answer is "Yes", God loved people who never even met Jesus, or heard of Him because, for many of them, He wouldn't be born for thousands of years yet.

He called the entire Israelite nation His children (that's "sons" and "daughters") long before Jesus appeared.

What was the word He used for Abraham? Oh yeah... "friend."
. Love does not equal fellowship!
God may have loved us but he did not have fellowship with us. We dont get that relationship before we accept the free gift through faith.
I can love my neighbor but that doesnt mean that I fellowship with them.

As far as abraham is concerned:
Abraham was called God's friend because he obeyed God to the utmost limit, but also because in the moment of sacrificing Isaac he shared a piece of God's own heart. Through that willingness to sacrifice his greatest treasure, Abraham shared a glimpse into what God was willing to do for our sakes. It was a foreshadow. Context Willie context.

Repentance and obedience brings us into fellowship with God. Nothing more nothing less.
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#70
Its a shame that you misinterpret Gods word.

Isaiah 59:2
But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, And your sins have hidden His face from you so that He does not hear.
You read it, you wrote it, and yet you cannot understand it.

Isaiah said nothing of God separating Himself from us. He clearly wrote that OUR OWN SIN and the clouded distortion it makes of our perceptions is what was causing us to feel a separation. We, OURSELVES, separated "in our minds" (as Paul said) from Him.
 
Nov 22, 2015
20,436
1,430
0
#71
We were the ones to separate ourselves from God...even from the garden God still came down and visited with Adam even though He knew they sinned...He visited with Cain, ..walked Enoch, Abraham, was with Moses..

Sin separates us fro the Lord..He is not afraid of sin..if so..then Jesus must have walked aound with blinders on..it's a complete fallacy which stems fro our religious traditions..

We are the ones that alienate ourselves in our own minds..BUT Christ came to set us free from all that darkness within us!!!

Colossians 1:21-22 (NASB)
[SUP]21 [/SUP] And although you were formerly alienated and hostile in mind, engaged in evil deeds,
[SUP]22 [/SUP] yet He has now reconciled you in His fleshly body through death, in order to present you before Him holy and blameless and beyond reproach—

God loves us deeply and the "sin" problem has been done away with so that we could have an good conscience and come to Him without the sin blinding us from Him.

Hebrews 9:14 (NASB)
[SUP]14 [/SUP] how much more will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without blemish to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God?


You read it, you wrote it, and yet you cannot understand it.

Isaiah said nothing of God separating Himself from us. He clearly wrote that OUR OWN SIN and the clouded distortion it makes of our perceptions is what was causing us to feel a separation. We, OURSELVES, separated "in our minds" (as Paul said) from Him.
 
Jun 23, 2015
1,990
37
0
#72
You read it, you wrote it, and yet you cannot understand it.

Isaiah said nothing of God separating Himself from us. He clearly wrote that OUR OWN SIN and the clouded distortion it makes of our perceptions is what was causing us to feel a separation. We, OURSELVES, separated "in our minds" (as Paul said) from Him.

Oh so its just a feeling huh? LOL
Context willie context.
The argument here is whether the lost have fellowship with God.
 
S

Sirk

Guest
#73
We were the ones to separate ourselves from God...even from the garden God still came down and visited with Adam even though He knew they sinned...He visited with Cain, ..walked Enoch, Abraham, was with Moses..

Sin separates us fro the Lord..He is not afraid of sin..if so..then Jesus must have walked aound with blinders on..it's a complete fallacy which stems fro our religious traditions..

We are the ones that alienate ourselves in our own minds..BUT Christ came to set us free from all that darkness within us!!!

Colossians 1:21-22 (NASB)
[SUP]21 [/SUP] And although you were formerly alienated and hostile in mind, engaged in evil deeds,
[SUP]22 [/SUP] yet He has now reconciled you in His fleshly body through death, in order to present you before Him holy and blameless and beyond reproach—

God loves us deeply and the "sin" problem has been done away with so that we could have an good conscience and come to Him without the sin blinding us from Him.

Hebrews 9:14 (NASB)
[SUP]14 [/SUP] how much more will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without blemish to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God?
Yep...we sure are...and we do it to those close to us too. We separate ourselves when we get insecure and afraid or when we sin. Instead of leaning more into God we hide from him. I wonder how different the fall would have looked had Adam and Eve went right to God and went.....God....we screwed up man. Instead...they separated and hid. God is a gentleman...and if we separate He lets us and is patient and still shows us the way home.
 
Nov 22, 2015
20,436
1,430
0
#74
Amen!....I liked how God said to Adam and Eve.."Who told you that you were naked?"...condemnation and guilt has a "voice"...that is why it is so important to know that there ..There is now therefore no condemnation for them that are in Christ.....condemnation is a killer and it has a voice that speaks to us..thank God for the "voice" of the Holy Spirit that speaks to us that we are in Christ..we have His righteousness now!

It's all a matter of identity...when we see who we are in Christ..we manifest outwardly who we already are in our new creation..our inner man...His life produces the fruit...


Yep...we sure are...and we do it to those close to us too. We separate ourselves when we get insecure and afraid or when we sin. Instead of leaning more into God we hide from him. I wonder how different the fall would have looked had Adam and Eve went right to God and went.....God....we screwed up man. Instead...they separated and hid. God is a gentleman...and if we separate He lets us and is patient and still shows us the way home.
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#75
Oh so its just a feeling huh? LOL
Context willie context.
The argument here is whether the lost have fellowship with God.
It's never been about "the lost" who never accepted Christ. It has always been about Christians who are "saved', but sin.
 
Nov 22, 2015
20,436
1,430
0
#76
It's time for some humor!...listen to your queen!...:rolleyes:


 
Nov 30, 2013
682
10
0
#77
Amen!....I liked how God said to Adam and Eve.."Who told you that you were naked?"...condemnation and guilt has a "voice"...that is why it is so important to know that there ..There is now therefore no condemnation for them that are in Christ.....condemnation is a killer and it has a voice that speaks to us..thank God for the "voice" of the Holy Spirit that speaks to us that we are in Christ..we have His righteousness now!

It's all a matter of identity...when we see who we are in Christ..we manifest outwardly who we already are in our new creation..our inner man...His life produces the fruit...



Sister Grace,


Now this is what you call the Investigative Judgment. God came looking for Adam and Eve in the cool of the day as He always did, but didn't see the happy couple. He called to them to find out where they were. Adam immediately admitted that he was naked and hid himself from the face of their loving Father. God asked Adam, "Who told you that you were naked?" "Did you eat of the tree of the tree that I told you not to eat?" Then of course the blame game started. But you see, so many people don't believe in the Investigative Judgment. How can our case be decided unless we go to trial? God is a just and fair God..so He examines all of the evidence prior to deciding on punishment. This is what is going to happen to all of humanity prior to the coming of Jesus in the clouds..as a matter of fact He has already judged the dead. He is now judging the living. God says, "Today salvation has come to us" so if we are abiding in Christ today which is all He gives any of us..then if we die, this day or any day we are abiding in Christ, we are saved without a shadow of a doubt.
 
L

ladylynn

Guest
#79
Sorry, no retraction.... if you said the things you said you told him.

And his note was the usual parroting back to us all the things our kids think we want to hear. All of our kids quickly learn to do that.
I agree Willie-T., Some years later when our kids became young adults., I was stunned to find out just that, my sons told me they just told us what we wanted to hear and then when we were done, they just went and did what they wanted. And all those years I thought they had learned some great lesson when in fact they were very resentful and angry at us for the harping and what they perceived as us wanting perfection. But we were teaching our kids exactly what we thought God was doing with us.


 
S

Sirk

Guest
#80
if kids feel harped on they probably are. When my son was about two I came home from church and set my 3000 dollar guitar in the entry way. I went and did my thing and when I came back around the corner he had the guitar out of the case on the tile floor. I calmly walked over to him as he was wiping my guitar with the cloth.. just like he saw me doing it and I knelt down next to him and I said...."are you cleaning daddies guitar"...he looked at me with his eyes all lit up and said..."ya daddy". I thanked him for being so thoughtful and then I said...."buddy, you can clean my guitar anytime you like but the only thing I ask is that you leave it in the case". You have no idea the closeness and bond that me and my son share. He trusts me and he listens when I am teaching him and then I see him do the things I show him. I hear about him doing the things I show him from his teacher. Your experience isn't necessarily everyone elses.


Yes...my guitar was scratched.....but the bond and trust I gained with my son was like a beautiful jewel.