Unfaithful Spouse

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Crittle

Guest
#1
#1
I have been battling with this for years and usually I just yell and scream when I find out that he has been sexting other women or getting pictures not this time I'm not mad i'm just really really hurt I can even scream all I can do is cry. I know how this all started it all came about 10 years ago when we first got together I had sex with another man and told him about it and since then I believe he has justified sexting because hes not having sex with anyone and this last time I saw on his email he was meeting up with someone on craigslist to get a bj. he swears he chickened out but still met up with this person twice "to just get drunk" I don't know. I really do love him and care for him I'm just tired of hurting. I'm trying to save what we have but its hard as him not being a believer and I am. I worry a lot because I leave for India in January for 2 weeks and I don't know what he will do. I ask him what will you do to make sure this does not happen again and all he can say is he wont. Its weird to me that i'm willing to try but don't know if he is in all honesty he says he is willing but I don't see it. He wants to try and make better but I don't see him even trying to do what what I ask of him. Its as simple as writing a letter on why do you love me? I have been trying to find this book The power of a praying wife but cant find it anywhere I just want to know what I can do because deep down I feel its my fault for messing up 10 years ago. Prayers advice. is this a lost cause... don't really want to give up on everything.
Crittle
 
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kaylagrl

Guest
#2
#2
Crittle said:
I have been battling with this for years and usually I just yell and scream when I find out that he has been sexting other women or getting pictures not this time I'm not mad i'm just really really hurt I can even scream all I can do is cry. I know how this all started it all came about 10 years ago when we first got together I had sex with another man and told him about it and since then I believe he has justified sexting because hes not having sex with anyone and this last time I saw on his email he was meeting up with someone on craigslist to get a bj. he swears he chickened out but still met up with this person twice "to just get drunk" I don't know. I really do love him and care for him I'm just tired of hurting. I'm trying to save what we have but its hard as him not being a believer and I am. I worry a lot because I leave for India in January for 2 weeks and I don't know what he will do. I ask him what will you do to make sure this does not happen again and all he can say is he wont. Its weird to me that i'm willing to try but don't know if he is in all honesty he says he is willing but I don't see it. He wants to try and make better but I don't see him even trying to do what what I ask of him. Its as simple as writing a letter on why do you love me? I have been trying to find this book The power of a praying wife but cant find it anywhere I just want to know what I can do because deep down I feel its my fault for messing up 10 years ago. Prayers advice. is this a lost cause... don't really want to give up on everything.
Crittle
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Have you been to any kind of counseling? Were you married when you cheated?
 
T

thatgirl29

Guest
#3
#3
10 years of being with a non believer..is he dead set on not believing? You aren't equally yolked, I highly doubt you'll ever work out ..but you both have been hurt...and you're allowing him to continuously do these things behind your back....if he did it once, just to get you back...that's one thing...but to keep doing it...its way past that....sorry..saying a prayer for you.
 
C

Crittle

Guest
#5
#5
kaylagrl said:
Have you been to any kind of counseling? Were you married when you cheated?
Click to expand...
No we wernt and we did go to counseling at my church but he only wanted to go once
 
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Crittle

Guest
#6
#6
Thank you. I know he did not have the best past or childhood as well and I feel like that has alot to do with it as well but not sure. I just believe with prayer maybe one day he will come around and believe.
 
C

Crittle

Guest
#7
#7
Thanks I will get this. Has anyone else read this book?
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#8
#8
Crittle said:
No we wernt and we did go to counseling at my church but he only wanted to go once
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While cheating isnt right,you've admitted you were wrong,inside marriage is a whole different story. And besides what kind of love is that, to pay you back by cheating on you? Wow. I would be up front with him and give an ultimatum, go to counseling or we file for divorce. Frankly its your only choice.You have too much going on to get through it without professional counseling.Ask your pastor if he can recommend someone. And if he has problems from childhood on top of that? Ya,you need long term counseling to sort it all out.If he's not willing you need to file for divorce. He needs to know this is serious and needs to be dealt with.Its time for a wake up call.
 
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purpose

Guest
#9
#9
Prayers to you. ! Acknowledge God and he will direct your paths.
 
C

Crittle

Guest
#10
#10
Thank you everyone we are currently working on mending our relationship doing something similar to love dare thanks for all you prayers and God Bless
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#11
Jul 3, 2015
56,293
26,331
113
#11
Crittle said:
No we wernt and we did go to counseling at my church but he only wanted to go once
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Meanwhile he has been punishing you for ten years? It does not add up.
 
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