Z
I went through a bit of "soul searching", I guess you could say, last week, though I don't like the term because it sounds so cliche. Anyway, I spent a lot of time in thought, a lot of time in prayer, all of that stuff. Speaking from a spiritual standpoint, I feel like I've made some decisions that have changed my perspective on things dramatically, and in a really good way I think. ANYWAY, before going on too long about that, there are a couple things in the following poem I want to clear up. 1. when using the terms "she" and "her" it does not necessarily mean I am referring to any girl, or specific situation from my life in general. No, it is not about my marriage. No, it is not about any relationship I may have had and didn't work out. The "her" I refer to is speaking more of a strong desire that, in order to progress to a certain area in life, must be let go of, if at least for a time. Not that desires are bad, but there are times in life we may have to let go of them, and in some cases that can be a painful experience, and that is what I am talking about. 2. Yes, when I say "God" I am talking about God. Do I always walk with a christian attitude? No. Do I always posess christian speach? I have a feeling my co-workers would have a good laugh if I said yes. I am a human, I have a lot of short comings, but there is a core to my existance. An integral piece of my life that cannot, and will not ever be changed. God. He is why I breathe. He is why I am alive. He is the reason for my existance. I will love Him for all my days, and I know He will never leave my side no matter how foolish I may be.
I kissed her softly on the lips
And waved her away.
Staring out into a vast distance
There seems to be no end.
And to the end I must come
A final decision to be made
And I am resolute in this
I can not waver who I am
I can not turn from where I'm from
The breath that breathed life
And the dust that formed man
Remaining a vision in my dreams
She lays silently
Eyes closed and arms crossed
My hand reaches in the river
And away she floats
My eyes follow her path
And I am torn
And yet I know where I am
I know where my truth lies
I know where my life is formed
From the breath of life
To the dust of creation
And my eyes raise to the sky
A God I cannot see
A Spirit I can only sense
And I just pray my eyes won't close
The breather of all I am
And I have given all
All to the heavens I cannot concieve
My eyes shut tightly
Embracing this silence around me,
Transcendance into a myth
Forming from mists around
Becoming a reality unfound
Breathing a breath that gives life
Blowing the dust into something more
I am consumed from the inside
Broken from where I can't see,
And somehow filled again
By a grace that cannot be percieved
And eyes awashed in love
To walk away from this
is to commit suicide to the soul,
And I would be dead forevermore
My lasting breath,
My hopeless endeavors
Given into the hands of a God
that I cannot see,
And I am who I am
Because You are who You are.
I kissed her softly on the lips
And waved her away.
Staring out into a vast distance
There seems to be no end.
And to the end I must come
A final decision to be made
And I am resolute in this
I can not waver who I am
I can not turn from where I'm from
The breath that breathed life
And the dust that formed man
Remaining a vision in my dreams
She lays silently
Eyes closed and arms crossed
My hand reaches in the river
And away she floats
My eyes follow her path
And I am torn
And yet I know where I am
I know where my truth lies
I know where my life is formed
From the breath of life
To the dust of creation
And my eyes raise to the sky
A God I cannot see
A Spirit I can only sense
And I just pray my eyes won't close
The breather of all I am
And I have given all
All to the heavens I cannot concieve
My eyes shut tightly
Embracing this silence around me,
Transcendance into a myth
Forming from mists around
Becoming a reality unfound
Breathing a breath that gives life
Blowing the dust into something more
I am consumed from the inside
Broken from where I can't see,
And somehow filled again
By a grace that cannot be percieved
And eyes awashed in love
To walk away from this
is to commit suicide to the soul,
And I would be dead forevermore
My lasting breath,
My hopeless endeavors
Given into the hands of a God
that I cannot see,
And I am who I am
Because You are who You are.