9 Marks of Mature Masculinity

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phil36

phil36

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Feb 12, 2009
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#1
What are your thoughts - full article here 9 Marks of Mature Masculinity | CBMW | The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood

Here are the nine marks of mature masculinity.


  1. Mature masculinity expresses itself not in the demand to be served, but in the strength to serve and to sacrifice for the good of woman.
  2. Mature masculinity does not assume the authority of Christ over woman, but advocates it.
  3. Mature masculinity does not presume superiority, but mobilizes the strengths of others.
  4. Mature masculinity does not have to initiate every action, but feels the responsibility to provide a general pattern of initiative.
  5. Mature masculinity accepts the burden of the final say in disagreements between husband and wife, but does not presume to use it in every instance.
  6. Mature masculinity expresses its leadership in romantic sexual relations [in marriage] by communicating an aura of strong and tender pursuit.
  7. Mature masculinity expresses itself in a family by taking the initiative in disciplining the children when both parents are present and a family standard has been broken.
  8. Mature masculinity is sensitive to cultural expressions of masculinity and adapts to them (where no sin is involved) in order to communicate to a woman that a man would like to relate not in any aggressive or perverted way, but with maturity and dignity as a man.
  9. Mature masculinity recognizes that the call to leadership is a call to repentance and humility and risk-taking.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#2
#2
phil36 said:
What are your thoughts - full article here 9 Marks of Mature Masculinity | CBMW | The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood

Here are the nine marks of mature masculinity.


  1. Mature masculinity expresses itself not in the demand to be served, but in the strength to serve and to sacrifice for the good of woman.
  2. Mature masculinity does not assume the authority of Christ over woman, but advocates it.
  3. Mature masculinity does not presume superiority, but mobilizes the strengths of others.
  4. Mature masculinity does not have to initiate every action, but feels the responsibility to provide a general pattern of initiative.
  5. Mature masculinity accepts the burden of the final say in disagreements between husband and wife, but does not presume to use it in every instance.
  6. Mature masculinity expresses its leadership in romantic sexual relations [in marriage] by communicating an aura of strong and tender pursuit.
  7. Mature masculinity expresses itself in a family by taking the initiative in disciplining the children when both parents are present and a family standard has been broken.
  8. Mature masculinity is sensitive to cultural expressions of masculinity and adapts to them (where no sin is involved) in order to communicate to a woman that a man would like to relate not in any aggressive or perverted way, but with maturity and dignity as a man.
  9. Mature masculinity recognizes that the call to leadership is a call to repentance and humility and risk-taking.
Click to expand...
I like this. :) But, I'd like it much better if the word in red was "all". :)
 
Liamson

Liamson

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Feb 3, 2010
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I'll just put this here...
 
D

djness

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#4
#4
Mature masculinity by those nine rules seems awful woman centered.
So if I don't have a woman I can never be a man?
 
phil36

phil36

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djness said:
Mature masculinity by those nine rules seems awful woman centered.
So if I don't have a woman I can never be a man?
Click to expand...
That's right dj ;)

But ask yourself, does it describe masculinity?
 
B

BananaPie

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#6
#6
Well, DJ, since you don't have children, does that mean you cannot be a father to one? :D

Perhaps from the very beginning, God equipped the Man to protect the Woman that they may both be healthy to raise children into godly sons & godly daughter. :)
 
Oncefallen

Oncefallen

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Jan 15, 2011
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djness said:
Mature masculinity by those nine rules seems awful woman centered.
So if I don't have a woman I can never be a man?
Click to expand...
The list is an excerpt from an article that excerpted the list from a book by John Piper so the information supporting/explaining the list is missing. I would have to say that the list is specific to men in relationships/marriages based on specific wording.
 
B

BananaPie

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#8
#8
As for the OP, it sounds somewhat psychology-tweaked. A godly man learns directly from God by applying God's opinions directly to the man's mind & circumstances. Yes, godly men are helpful for training the next generation as well.

Yes, he'll have his immature moments, but that's precisely when he should anchor himself more to Christ, for in our weakness, God's perfect strength is made known to us. :)
 
D

djness

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#9
#9



Originally Posted by djness

Mature masculinity by those nine rules seems awful woman centered.
So if I don't have a woman I can never be a man?



That's right dj ;)

But ask yourself, does it describe masculinity?​
Click to expand...
Well, DJ, since you don't have children, does that mean you cannot be a father to one? :D

Perhaps from the very beginning, God equipped the Man to protect the Woman that they may both be healthy to raise children into godly sons & godly daughter. :)
Click to expand...
From both of your points of view a man can only be a man if he is a husband or a father.
What about single men who have neither of those things and quite possibly will never?
I think most of the points dealt less with God and more focused on what can a man do for women.

I looked at the original article and the thing that puzzles me is that he makes these references to women, but I did not see anywhere in the article the context of husband and wife. It just says these are 9 things you do to be a man. If it was title 9 ways to be a biblically masculine husband it would make more sense to me. It's not titled that. It's speaking about being a man in general. There is nothing about being a man that you can only be one if you have a woman. Unless I am totally not seeing something here, my opinion is that the author is in error. I realize people will say ''It's John Piper!, how can he be in error you heretic?!?" That's ok. I just don't personally see the connection.

In the opening chapter of Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, John Piper defines masculinity like this:
At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for, and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.

So like...if there are no women around I'm not a man right?


 
phil36

phil36

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#10
Feb 12, 2009
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djness said:
From both of your points of view a man can only be a man if he is a husband or a father.
What about single men who have neither of those things and quite possibly will never?
I think most of the points dealt less with God and more focused on what can a man do for women.

I looked at the original article and the thing that puzzles me is that he makes these references to women, but I did not see anywhere in the article the context of husband and wife. It just says these are 9 things you do to be a man. If it was title 9 ways to be a biblically masculine husband it would make more sense to me. It's not titled that. It's speaking about being a man in general. There is nothing about being a man that you can only be one if you have a woman. Unless I am totally not seeing something here, my opinion is that the author is in error. I realize people will say ''It's John Piper!, how can he be in error you heretic?!?" That's ok. I just don't personally see the connection.

In the opening chapter of Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, John Piper defines masculinity like this:
At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for, and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.

So like...if there are no women around I'm not a man right?
Click to expand...


I think a mature man would think that way. Piper also has a very good chapter on singleness (if memory serves me correct the book is a collection of essays making the whole, it may have been grudem).
 
D

djness

Guest
#11
#11
Oncefallen said:
The list is an excerpt from an article that excerpted the list from a book by John Piper so the information supporting/explaining the list is missing. I would have to say that the list is specific to men in relationships/marriages based on specific wording.
Click to expand...
Ya, I feel like there is a huge
missing.
 
phil36

phil36

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#12
Feb 12, 2009
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#12
djness said:
From both of your points of view a man can only be a man if he is a husband or a father.
What about single men who have neither of those things and quite possibly will never?
I think most of the points dealt less with God and more focused on what can a man do for women.

I looked at the original article and the thing that puzzles me is that he makes these references to women, but I did not see anywhere in the article the context of husband and wife. It just says these are 9 things you do to be a man. If it was title 9 ways to be a biblically masculine husband it would make more sense to me. It's not titled that. It's speaking about being a man in general. There is nothing about being a man that you can only be one if you have a woman. Unless I am totally not seeing something here, my opinion is that the author is in error. I realize people will say ''It's John Piper!, how can he be in error you heretic?!?" That's ok. I just don't personally see the connection.

In the opening chapter of Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, John Piper defines masculinity like this:
At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for, and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.

So like...if there are no women around I'm not a man right?
Click to expand...
Hi DJ, Im single. and I agree with the articlae as a whole..if you read what it was about.
 
Oncefallen

Oncefallen

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Jan 15, 2011
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phil36 said:
I think a mature man would think that way. Piper also has a very good chapter on singleness (if memory serves me correct the book is a collection of essays making the whole, it may have been grudem).
Click to expand...

Your memory serves correct about it being a collection of essays

Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood presents its essays in five sections:


  1. Vision and Overview (2 essays)
  2. Exegetical and Theological Studies (12 essays)
  3. Studies from Related Disciplines (5 essays)
  4. Applications and Implications (6 essays)
  5. Conclusion and Prospect (1 essay)
It also contains two appendices — an essay by Wayne Grudem and the Danvers Statement, and a Prefatory essay by John Piper.
 
phil36

phil36

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Tom Schriener has an excellent essay in there .. I will have to go and dig my copy out. infact its free on their website.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

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So this is like the christian version of an alpha male? :confused:
 
phil36

phil36

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#16
Well, its what the bible teaches what a male is and should be as against common cultural views either outside or inside the church.. (the book as a whole). not just about males though.

An example ch 11 - The valuable ministries of women in the context of male leadership..
 
B

BananaPie

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#17
#17
ROFLOL!

Of course, ZeroT, if that Alpha has "Omega" tagged to him, then now we're cruisin' mighty fine. :D
 
N

NightRevan

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#18
#18
Hmm, I'm guessing from the answer that this should be about men purely in marriage am I right? Cause it doesn't seem to say much to single guys, like others have said, it would seem to suggest that if you aren't married or have children you aren't a full biblical man, cause I'm not sure what that says about John the Baptist (the greatest man born of a woman) or Paul just from examples. I hope this doesn't come off aggressive, because I really don't want it to, it's just so often it seems within evangelical circles marriage is more central then anything else, and men are being defined by marriage or being husbands, not by their relationship and growth in Christ. And so I guess I'm taking this opportunity to get a few things that concern me off my chest, so I hope you don't mind me discussing this here ;), since you've given the opportunity with this thread :D .

In the NT marriage and those in marriage is discussed in the context of the church as the family of God, but I think to often the balance is switched the other way, church and Christians are being defined in relation to marriage and whether they are or not. It can be concern, that marriage is almost seems to be the goal and yet by this standard we would downgrade such people as I mentioned above (I'm not even mentioning Jesus Himself, cause that goes without saying), and man or woman is defined to me by they maturity in their walk with God, by the fruit of the Spirit evident in their lives, and the Christ-likeness of their character, and the agape love that is evident in their lives. While there are, and it is important to celebrate the male and female distinctiveness (since in my view this is part of being the whole image of God), and that it is an important part of who we are in Christ, none the less it is their character and maturity as Christian alone that I look to. Often when I see masculinity and femininity discussed it seems flipping the emphasis I see in the NT in how to look at people (an example being defining Christians by marriage, and making the church a support to marriage, rather then marriage something that happens within the family of the church).

Anyway, those are my thoughts, which as still in flux, and I'm probably quite biased myself being a single guy who's sometimes heard things expressed the wrong way, so I hope this doesn't offend the OP or anyone reading it, just take it as my opinion as I understand things at the moment.
 
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A

AgeofKnowledge

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#19
#19
Nine marks of masculinity are:

1. Born again in God's kingdom
2. Good morals and character; responsible
3. Good relationships within the context of accommodation sans-compromise
4. Good theology
5. Good socialization
6. Good education
7. Good standup
8. Good takedowns
9. Good ground game

;)
 
phil36

phil36

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Feb 12, 2009
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#20
Hi Nightraven,

No offence to me.. the 9 points (marks) are aimed more to the married or to those thinking about taking the plunge as they say. But I would say they are good points to know as older guys we should be able to teach the younger guys over and against popular cultural beliefs and not just culture but from within.

I am single and know there is nothing wrong with being single. I agree it seems that the church is always talking about married couples/families and seem to be neglecting single, I am not sure if this is the case overall. We as Christians single or not need to support those who married more than ever.

The family unit is 'society' when the family disappears/breaks down or re moulded then society crumbles.. as we can all see for ourselves. We now have kids growing up not knowing family life or how family is, or what is a male apart from the biological difference and the same for girls... mix al this together and? ultimately, its being faithful to what scripture tells us, so even though some of are single it is still important to know what makes a good Godly man to lead his family spiritually, emotionally and caringly.


As a side issue can we possibly be role models for kids who don't have a dad at home.. the possibilities are endless.

Anyhow good post Nightraven
 
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