Hey Everyone,
Do people often assume things about you because of (insert stereotype here) that is completely untrue?
For example, do people assume you fit a mold because of your age, height, weight, race, denomination, family background, etc.? Maybe you are a twin, youngest/oldest/middle child, young parent, etc., and people automatically assume you are (fill in the blank.) Does it annoy the dickens out of you like it annoys me? How do you react to such things, and has someone ever told you they changed their mind about a certain group or stereotype because of knowing you? What advice would you give to others?
If there is such a thing as a Non-Asian Asian, that description would fit me to a T. My friends even say, "You are the whitest white girl we know."
I try to be understanding because I know some people really are trying to be sweet and culturally sensitive, but I don't like it at all when people try to "make me be Asian." They will talk about how I must eat kimchi all the time (I don't like it much at all, to be honest, and never eat Korean food) or how I must be really good in school (I hated most every moment in school), quick with numbers (I still count on my fingers, thank you very much) and, adding insult to injury, the absolute worst is the stereotypes among the dating scene. (Nuke, I have not forgotten that pic you posted of "me" and a 90-year-old man and SOMEDAY, I will have my revenge!!!)
One of my biggest pet peeves is when men write, "Oh, I just find Asian girls to be so attractive," which, I know, some are being sincere and I do try to be understanding, but to be completely honest, it makes me feel like a breed of dog. To me, it's about as as flattering to me as someone saying, "Oh, I just love poodles... they're so adorable..." GAG GAG GAG.
I then get to listen to the long list of what men, even good Christian men, think Asian women are: subservient, sexually obedient, submissive, and basically... terrific doormats. Older men tell me, "But it's your culture to respect/marry an older man," (older meaning 55-89) and tell me my attitude is "un-Christian" for not wanting to do so, which brings me to another pet peeve of mine--"Playing the God Card." "You should do X because you don't really believe in GOD if youd on't do so!!" I confess that this makes me want to lay hands on someone, and more of in a slapping rather than blessing kind of way. (I know, I know, in some ways I'm making my own stereotype about men who make stereotypes but you'll have to excuse me for venting a lifetime of frustration.
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While of course I believe in God's role for wives and I am respectful... I am also my own person and not afraid to stand up for myself. As one boyfriend found out, when he started to push the boundaries (physical abuse), I pushed back and eventually defended myself. As a male co-worker once said, "Anyone who is looking for a 'typical Asian girl' is going to be surprised as (heck) by you, Kim!"
And I'm sorry, but that makes me extremely proud. I enjoy being the "good girl who breaks all the rules...it just depends on which rules they are."
How about all of you? What do people assume about you, and how do you prove them wrong?
