Like most of us, I've had my fair share of embarrassing moments. From the time I decided to cut my own hair in third grade. With a scissors! My kinky African hair! Needless to say it was a disaster! I STILL had to go to school the next morning. Embarrassing!
Or the time we had a bomb scare and I was in the 6th grade. I was in the bath at the time! my mom called me out, "Come and see! Now!" I thought there was a UFO! (Thinking back on this I often wonder, "Why on earth would I think UFO?"). I ended up being frog marched to the local shopping centre draped in a towel. EVERYONE and their cousin was there! It was an assembly point! Embarrassing!
As an adult I went to our local theatre one night as I was on ushering duty with the usual suspects (a group of us would volunteer to usher on a roster as this amateur theatre had little money) So, after helping people to their seats I settled down in special seats for ushers in the front row to watch the show, which was a musical celebrating the music of the Beatles. Now our team leader - an eighty something year old lady - always encourages fellow ushers stationed in the front of the theatre to get up and dance
towards the end of a musical, in a bid to get the audience to participate and so leave feeling exhilarated . This does'nt always work. In fact; I think the success rate (if you can call it that) is dismal. So, on this Saturday, I had the misfortune of being posted in the front near the left exit.
By the time the second song started our team leader was up and got us dancing! For the rest of the show!! In front of everyone!
I was like " but we only supposed to make a spectacle of ourselves at the end of the show!"
I tried to look as inconspicuous as possible, but she made a bee line for me! I'm also quite tall so she weeded me out, pulled me up and began to gyrate and contort her body into positions I didn't think were mechanically possible or even allowed! Did I say that she is in her eighties?? Then this fellow usher - also in his eighties - began to do "the walk" from his station at the right front exit towards us to the strains of "Here comes the sun" He came across the front row of the auditorium- meaning that if anyone had not noticed us on the left, they were aware of our antics by the time he got to us! Then I had two of them gyrating and twisting their bodies! And guess who had to dance with them? I dont like dancing at all and work hard to avoid it when I can. Well actually its because, I can't dance. I got no rhythm at all best I can do is the shuffle. So the idea of having me dancing in front of a 300 plus audience on a Saturday evening is, at best, unthinkable! But there we were!
Finally left said theatre two and a half hours later with a sore back, battered ego and feet that seemed to be yelling, Dammit man! What on earth is wrong with you?
Guess who is NOT ushering another musical again?
Care to share an embarrassing moment? Do tell....
Or the time we had a bomb scare and I was in the 6th grade. I was in the bath at the time! my mom called me out, "Come and see! Now!" I thought there was a UFO! (Thinking back on this I often wonder, "Why on earth would I think UFO?"). I ended up being frog marched to the local shopping centre draped in a towel. EVERYONE and their cousin was there! It was an assembly point! Embarrassing!
As an adult I went to our local theatre one night as I was on ushering duty with the usual suspects (a group of us would volunteer to usher on a roster as this amateur theatre had little money) So, after helping people to their seats I settled down in special seats for ushers in the front row to watch the show, which was a musical celebrating the music of the Beatles. Now our team leader - an eighty something year old lady - always encourages fellow ushers stationed in the front of the theatre to get up and dance
towards the end of a musical, in a bid to get the audience to participate and so leave feeling exhilarated . This does'nt always work. In fact; I think the success rate (if you can call it that) is dismal. So, on this Saturday, I had the misfortune of being posted in the front near the left exit. By the time the second song started our team leader was up and got us dancing! For the rest of the show!! In front of everyone!
I was like " but we only supposed to make a spectacle of ourselves at the end of the show!"
I tried to look as inconspicuous as possible, but she made a bee line for me! I'm also quite tall so she weeded me out, pulled me up and began to gyrate and contort her body into positions I didn't think were mechanically possible or even allowed! Did I say that she is in her eighties?? Then this fellow usher - also in his eighties - began to do "the walk" from his station at the right front exit towards us to the strains of "Here comes the sun" He came across the front row of the auditorium- meaning that if anyone had not noticed us on the left, they were aware of our antics by the time he got to us! Then I had two of them gyrating and twisting their bodies! And guess who had to dance with them? I dont like dancing at all and work hard to avoid it when I can. Well actually its because, I can't dance. I got no rhythm at all best I can do is the shuffle. So the idea of having me dancing in front of a 300 plus audience on a Saturday evening is, at best, unthinkable! But there we were!
Finally left said theatre two and a half hours later with a sore back, battered ego and feet that seemed to be yelling, Dammit man! What on earth is wrong with you?
Guess who is NOT ushering another musical again?
Care to share an embarrassing moment? Do tell....
