How have you grown?
- Thread starter Grace-Like-Rain
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N
How are you different now than you were 5 years ago?
I was pretty crazy in my 20's. I didn't know what i was doing, and i did whatever. When i hit 30 something just clicked. I'm just about 31 now and i feel much more settled and sure.
How have you grown?
I've learned that all my actions have some type of consequences, and i've grown from the consequences of the stupid things i've done.
What important things do you know now that you didn't then?
I can't do whatever i want when i want. That isn't how life works.
What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of?
What flaws?
No, but seriously
What flaws???
I was pretty crazy in my 20's. I didn't know what i was doing, and i did whatever. When i hit 30 something just clicked. I'm just about 31 now and i feel much more settled and sure.
How have you grown?
I've learned that all my actions have some type of consequences, and i've grown from the consequences of the stupid things i've done.
What important things do you know now that you didn't then?
I can't do whatever i want when i want. That isn't how life works.
What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of?
What flaws?
No, but seriously
What flaws???
2009... I was depressed and Smoking. I never realized how many things in my life I could lose at one time.
But I was making changes for people. But I hadn't changed at all really. I said I was going to be better. I even practiced what better was supposed to look like. But I was not better. Yeah I quit smoking, sometimes for a year or a few months or a few weeks but, in my heart I enjoyed it and wanted it.
After being depressed for a long time, I lost a lot of my self respect. I rushed off to try and "Escape" but it is impossible to run from one's self. I just wanted to be somewhere away, where I could reinvent myself.
God didn't want me to be someone else, somewhere else. He wanted me to be who He set out to make. I had to count the cost of what it meant to be a Christian, and I even toyed with the idea of walking away but, I couldn't. I was either all in or playing some really weird game of charades.
So I took responsibility and decided to make amends with God and myself. It was only then then that I could grow and move forward.
But I was making changes for people. But I hadn't changed at all really. I said I was going to be better. I even practiced what better was supposed to look like. But I was not better. Yeah I quit smoking, sometimes for a year or a few months or a few weeks but, in my heart I enjoyed it and wanted it.
After being depressed for a long time, I lost a lot of my self respect. I rushed off to try and "Escape" but it is impossible to run from one's self. I just wanted to be somewhere away, where I could reinvent myself.
God didn't want me to be someone else, somewhere else. He wanted me to be who He set out to make. I had to count the cost of what it meant to be a Christian, and I even toyed with the idea of walking away but, I couldn't. I was either all in or playing some really weird game of charades.
So I took responsibility and decided to make amends with God and myself. It was only then then that I could grow and move forward.
A
2009
Living my life in a stress that was unbelievable. Ministry, Ministry, Ministry, Work, Ministry, Work, Ministry....crazy. I was living in the city of Valencia at that time.
December, 2010
Took tremendous decisions that affected everything forever. Those decisions were in regards to ministry and quality time.
August 2013
Took one big and difficult decision that led me to be stronger and bold. Definitely made changes in terms of friendships, finances, dreams, projects and accountability.
When I understood the meaning of the word decision I stopped being a coward. I went forward in a way I could not even imagine. My motto is always go beyond, go beyond. Forward, always forward. There will be always something better than this, someone better than this, a day better than this.
For me every single day is a decision.
Living my life in a stress that was unbelievable. Ministry, Ministry, Ministry, Work, Ministry, Work, Ministry....crazy. I was living in the city of Valencia at that time.
December, 2010
Took tremendous decisions that affected everything forever. Those decisions were in regards to ministry and quality time.
August 2013
Took one big and difficult decision that led me to be stronger and bold. Definitely made changes in terms of friendships, finances, dreams, projects and accountability.
When I understood the meaning of the word decision I stopped being a coward. I went forward in a way I could not even imagine. My motto is always go beyond, go beyond. Forward, always forward. There will be always something better than this, someone better than this, a day better than this.
For me every single day is a decision.
T
Well I used to be all about myself and what I wanted. I was very se;fish and closed minded when it came to the word of God. It seemed confusing and I was kind of on a path of my own. My goal was to get as many people to like me as I wanted. I drank every weekend (an army tradition) and felt enormously empty and spiritually vacant the next day. Now I feel fulfillment in Christ. I know now that he is enough. I was a prodigal son more or less. I was walking away from Christ and heading down a dangerous path toward alcoholism. It wasnt until God snatched me up and revealed Himself to me that I truly began to get to know me. Now I fervently seek to know Him through His word and I's knowing Him more and more daily.
I've grown mostly in the knowledge of His Word. What he says is becoming more and more clear to me the more I read and dwell on his word. I've become more discerning than I ever was before. I am slower to anger than I ever was before.
I've learned that salvation isnt about me and have gained the knowledge of my own insignificance when I compare myself to the Glory of God. That he is infinitely sovereign in everything He wills. The flaws I have improved in me would be in my inability to discern the Word of God and am slower to jump to conclusions. I now treat people the way Christ commanded for His sake alone!
I think that's good for now.
I've grown mostly in the knowledge of His Word. What he says is becoming more and more clear to me the more I read and dwell on his word. I've become more discerning than I ever was before. I am slower to anger than I ever was before.
I've learned that salvation isnt about me and have gained the knowledge of my own insignificance when I compare myself to the Glory of God. That he is infinitely sovereign in everything He wills. The flaws I have improved in me would be in my inability to discern the Word of God and am slower to jump to conclusions. I now treat people the way Christ commanded for His sake alone!
I think that's good for now.
growing up under the revolving cast of characters and rampant dysfunction, i started off very young learning how to be agreeable, pleasing, and rather well-behaved around adult decision makers. as i got older, the disparity between that placating identity and the real me became galvanized by the freedoms gained through independence. i learned to protect these identities by keeping plenty of literal and figurative miles between those i didn't want to disappoint and providing rather selective updates.
i was seen as a "good girl". and i thought i that could go out ____ and ____ as long as i didn't ____ or ______ i believed i could maintain that person -- that fake person. i used to think i getting up for church almost made up for that.
that girl was gone before 2009, but the remnants of that mindset still lingered. being so foolish to deceive myself. i had long rededicated my life to Christ and sought to bring my heart and life under the obedience of God. but i still found myself working really hard to learn to be honest with the people who didn't really know me as well as they thought they did.
in some ways, i was one of those people.
2009 found me really putting this lesson to the test, and recognizing that i was opening myself for judgment, fear, and great risk with people whom i felt very little trust to begin with.
also to be more authentic and less afraid of failing. at the time i was living this lesson everyday while running a fledgling new business, and almost everyday thinking, "how much longer until i go belly up?". i felt called to do what i was doing, but would constantly question whether i had heard right.
since 2009, i've fallen in love with the Word all over again. i have never loved, treasured, purely enjoyed my time studying the Bible. and never before has it nourished and sustained me in ways that i've experienced in the last five years.
i've never had (or known) more joy in my life. not even remotely close.
i was seen as a "good girl". and i thought i that could go out ____ and ____ as long as i didn't ____ or ______ i believed i could maintain that person -- that fake person. i used to think i getting up for church almost made up for that.
that girl was gone before 2009, but the remnants of that mindset still lingered. being so foolish to deceive myself. i had long rededicated my life to Christ and sought to bring my heart and life under the obedience of God. but i still found myself working really hard to learn to be honest with the people who didn't really know me as well as they thought they did.
in some ways, i was one of those people.
2009 found me really putting this lesson to the test, and recognizing that i was opening myself for judgment, fear, and great risk with people whom i felt very little trust to begin with.
also to be more authentic and less afraid of failing. at the time i was living this lesson everyday while running a fledgling new business, and almost everyday thinking, "how much longer until i go belly up?". i felt called to do what i was doing, but would constantly question whether i had heard right.
since 2009, i've fallen in love with the Word all over again. i have never loved, treasured, purely enjoyed my time studying the Bible. and never before has it nourished and sustained me in ways that i've experienced in the last five years.
i've never had (or known) more joy in my life. not even remotely close.
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J
how have I grown in the last five years?
In considering, I would have to say that up until five years ago, I lived basically the same life. I knew it wasn't right, but it seemed there was nothing I could do to change it. I was into new age earlier, and had my astrologic chart done. It did explain my self beliefs, and how life is for me, and why, by the planets. But there was something missing.
My chart said I would have trouble in life with love, and friendships. I thought "really? no kidding..."
But there must be something I could do about it.
I met someone totally different from that, went through more junk in life than I thought I could handle, determined to prove myself. I was tired of my "friends", and aquaintences putting me down for not being married, of "not doing my manly duty".
Married, with kids, having sex, etc. So I jumped into life with both feet, like a "man should." She had two kids by her ex. Boy did I learn something...
Then her sis, the "boss", jumped in. More stuff here than I can type in one night lol! My wife's
friends, sister, other female influences, etc. took me down. I had a stroke five years ago. She found new "friends" to continue taking me down. Bankruptcy ensued, she took out everything on me. I couldn't do anything right. So I started taking classes, going to counseling, reading the Bible. Things came to a head a year and a half ago, and I left. Lived with my parents. Let my wife be in suspense until last summer, her youngest left for the military. Then she thought I would move back in.
I told her that in order for that to happen I needed four things.
1) We need to have a healthy loving, sexual marriage. I had complained of this for years.
2) I deserve her respect as a man. This had been lacking for many years.
3) I deserve respect from her "friends". I was sick of her always picking friends that were impossible for me to get along with. And she knew it...
4) I deserve respect from her boys (my stepchildren)
She merely told me "I guess we will get a divorce" I said okay. And that was that. I never was a consideration to her.
So now I have custody of our daughter, and live with my parents. At 49 years old. I guess the last five years I have learned that I choose my life. I choose my friends. I choose my interests. And I now have put God first in my life.
My life is God's, and mine. And my family's. Nothing else in life will be considered important for me, unless it benefits me, or my daughter and parents, IN God. And that...IS that.
Never again will I bow down to another person. My next wife will be of the Lord, like me and my daughter.
She will be a decent, loving, upright woman. NO exceptions. And I will have a decent job, again no exceptions. This is My Life, In Christ.
In considering, I would have to say that up until five years ago, I lived basically the same life. I knew it wasn't right, but it seemed there was nothing I could do to change it. I was into new age earlier, and had my astrologic chart done. It did explain my self beliefs, and how life is for me, and why, by the planets. But there was something missing.
My chart said I would have trouble in life with love, and friendships. I thought "really? no kidding..."
But there must be something I could do about it.
I met someone totally different from that, went through more junk in life than I thought I could handle, determined to prove myself. I was tired of my "friends", and aquaintences putting me down for not being married, of "not doing my manly duty".
Married, with kids, having sex, etc. So I jumped into life with both feet, like a "man should." She had two kids by her ex. Boy did I learn something...
Then her sis, the "boss", jumped in. More stuff here than I can type in one night lol! My wife's
friends, sister, other female influences, etc. took me down. I had a stroke five years ago. She found new "friends" to continue taking me down. Bankruptcy ensued, she took out everything on me. I couldn't do anything right. So I started taking classes, going to counseling, reading the Bible. Things came to a head a year and a half ago, and I left. Lived with my parents. Let my wife be in suspense until last summer, her youngest left for the military. Then she thought I would move back in.
I told her that in order for that to happen I needed four things.
1) We need to have a healthy loving, sexual marriage. I had complained of this for years.
2) I deserve her respect as a man. This had been lacking for many years.
3) I deserve respect from her "friends". I was sick of her always picking friends that were impossible for me to get along with. And she knew it...
4) I deserve respect from her boys (my stepchildren)
She merely told me "I guess we will get a divorce" I said okay. And that was that. I never was a consideration to her.
So now I have custody of our daughter, and live with my parents. At 49 years old. I guess the last five years I have learned that I choose my life. I choose my friends. I choose my interests. And I now have put God first in my life.
My life is God's, and mine. And my family's. Nothing else in life will be considered important for me, unless it benefits me, or my daughter and parents, IN God. And that...IS that.
Never again will I bow down to another person. My next wife will be of the Lord, like me and my daughter.
She will be a decent, loving, upright woman. NO exceptions. And I will have a decent job, again no exceptions. This is My Life, In Christ.
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Good questions.
Where do I even start. I was pretty much self obsessed from my teens until I was 30 (I was born again then). Playing in bands didn't help, well except for rubbing the ugly god of ego.. that ego stays with you, and it needs topped up..it is truly ugly (in hindsight).
Even in my twenties when the kids where young, it was still all about me.. I would take them to the park and do Dad things and it is the right thing to do ..right? Knowing what I know now the answer is well its good but it was my attitude was wrong.. I could boast in what I was doing with the kids at work..taken them to the park, good holidays.. however, thinking back who's best interest was I doing these things? was it to make me look good ? Was I a good husband? after all I worked hard, made good money..done the holiday thing...but who's good was it for?
Then divorce..wow..my one prayer is that no one else has to go through that.. I was saved when I was 30 and divorced at 35 (41 now), ex wife was not saved.
Anyhow that's the sort of background.. that was a few years ago.
It has been a long road to where I am at.. I was really like a piece of metal that had had become tarnished and rusted... and over the years slowly but steadily all that rust and tarnish has been sanded (grinded) back down to show the metal below.
So in the last 5 years, I have learned to give all to God, in trust and for guidance. This takes time and hard lessons to learn, but it is more of learning to preach the gospel to yourself each and every day, that knowing all is Ok even when it 'feels' all so wrong.
Another important thing is material things.. we all love things.. I've learned now that most of these things are actually a distraction and in reality of the gospel are of no significance..
What am I doing? Am I just meandering through life lke a dull rag waiting for the end.. or is every day an opportunity for the Kingdom.. what I mean here is, everything I do... think about that for a moment.. everything! even having that afternoon nap lol. This has been a real focus for me in the last 2 years.. I'm not there yet! I think for those of us bit older understand this more as we realize how short time is, and how we are only young for a short while.
Another focus has been my prayer life.. is it as it should be... Im now hoping to wear out the knees of atleast 3 pairs of trousers a year lol. seriously, I have been looking at how I pray, what am I praying for and about... interestingly the more I have been praying the more wretched I realise I am and in need of Jesus.
Trying to understand scripture more.. I mean by that what did this originally mean, what doesn't mean now, and what does it mean to me..what is it saying about God.. and how can is this changing me.
More recently, I have been concerned about the younger ones in church. ie, Am I a good example to them, am I giving them good advice, am I showing them Jesus! I am truly concerned that what I am saying to some of them is biblical.. a couple of young guys come to mind they keep sending me texts and emails to ask questions.. that brings me to my knees for guidance to rightly guide these young men. So i'm really no different from anyone else, we are all on a journey to know Jesus, to Love Jesus, to be like Jesus, to show Jesus.
I think it was 1still that said...its a detox.. a deep cleansing from the inside out.. But bit by bit that rusty,tarnished bit of metal that is me, is starting to have spots that shine through..
Where do I even start. I was pretty much self obsessed from my teens until I was 30 (I was born again then). Playing in bands didn't help, well except for rubbing the ugly god of ego.. that ego stays with you, and it needs topped up..it is truly ugly (in hindsight).
Even in my twenties when the kids where young, it was still all about me.. I would take them to the park and do Dad things and it is the right thing to do ..right? Knowing what I know now the answer is well its good but it was my attitude was wrong.. I could boast in what I was doing with the kids at work..taken them to the park, good holidays.. however, thinking back who's best interest was I doing these things? was it to make me look good ? Was I a good husband? after all I worked hard, made good money..done the holiday thing...but who's good was it for?
Then divorce..wow..my one prayer is that no one else has to go through that.. I was saved when I was 30 and divorced at 35 (41 now), ex wife was not saved.
Anyhow that's the sort of background.. that was a few years ago.
It has been a long road to where I am at.. I was really like a piece of metal that had had become tarnished and rusted... and over the years slowly but steadily all that rust and tarnish has been sanded (grinded) back down to show the metal below.
So in the last 5 years, I have learned to give all to God, in trust and for guidance. This takes time and hard lessons to learn, but it is more of learning to preach the gospel to yourself each and every day, that knowing all is Ok even when it 'feels' all so wrong.
Another important thing is material things.. we all love things.. I've learned now that most of these things are actually a distraction and in reality of the gospel are of no significance..
What am I doing? Am I just meandering through life lke a dull rag waiting for the end.. or is every day an opportunity for the Kingdom.. what I mean here is, everything I do... think about that for a moment.. everything! even having that afternoon nap lol. This has been a real focus for me in the last 2 years.. I'm not there yet! I think for those of us bit older understand this more as we realize how short time is, and how we are only young for a short while.
Another focus has been my prayer life.. is it as it should be... Im now hoping to wear out the knees of atleast 3 pairs of trousers a year lol. seriously, I have been looking at how I pray, what am I praying for and about... interestingly the more I have been praying the more wretched I realise I am and in need of Jesus.
Trying to understand scripture more.. I mean by that what did this originally mean, what doesn't mean now, and what does it mean to me..what is it saying about God.. and how can is this changing me.
More recently, I have been concerned about the younger ones in church. ie, Am I a good example to them, am I giving them good advice, am I showing them Jesus! I am truly concerned that what I am saying to some of them is biblical.. a couple of young guys come to mind they keep sending me texts and emails to ask questions.. that brings me to my knees for guidance to rightly guide these young men. So i'm really no different from anyone else, we are all on a journey to know Jesus, to Love Jesus, to be like Jesus, to show Jesus.
I think it was 1still that said...its a detox.. a deep cleansing from the inside out.. But bit by bit that rusty,tarnished bit of metal that is me, is starting to have spots that shine through..
P
Oh i've grown quite a bit i must say. Not that i was this evil teenager back then but i'l admit i was much less God fearing then i am now, so i cared less about what activities i got into. My personality has changed quite a bit as well, but whose hasn't? But in general, just the way i look at humanity as a whole has changed. I've gotten lonelier as well because i see all these people ignoring God's word and sinning and i don't want to take in any part of that, so sometimes i consider myself a lone wolf.
J
I wish I could go back to that age and start over with what I know now! I envy you...
One thing I will say is...find others who have your values, and stick with them. Trust the Lord in this, and keep others' company that are like-minded.
"do not be conformed to this world" sound familiar? Truer words were not spoken. I was convinced by society that I must conform to this world. And had relationships with people who outwardly promoted this. Fact is, I was never meant to "go there", I had a higher calling. He has been waiting for me for a long time.
You owe it to yourself and the Lord, to follow and walk with him, he will not lead you astray!
One thing I will say is...find others who have your values, and stick with them. Trust the Lord in this, and keep others' company that are like-minded.
"do not be conformed to this world" sound familiar? Truer words were not spoken. I was convinced by society that I must conform to this world. And had relationships with people who outwardly promoted this. Fact is, I was never meant to "go there", I had a higher calling. He has been waiting for me for a long time.
You owe it to yourself and the Lord, to follow and walk with him, he will not lead you astray!
A
2009 was positively the worst year of my life. I was at an all time low of how I saw myself and the world. I was completely convinced hope was non-existent, joy was long forgotten and that everyone was looking for a way to hurt me. I started purposefully dating very messed up men with serious issues. These men enjoyed physically harming and humiliating women in the bedroom. And I told myself I could try to love these monsters. At least they were completely honest about who they were and didn't try to hide it. I thought everyone had monsters in them, just some were better at hiding it than others.
Three and a half years passed on and the only thing that changed was that I drank less and almost completely gave up self-mutilation. My mind was still on the same track regarding how I saw myself and the world.
Then over a year and a half ago, I gave my life to the Lord. My anxiety depression just seemed to be crushed to nothing under the pressure of His power and glory. And I came to realise that I was so dearly loved by One who pursued my heart with great intensity. God opened my eyes, and the world as I saw it began to fill with colour... He showed me something I thought I would never see or feel again: Hope. Through His word and His blood, the labels, ideas and words that seemed to define me were slowly breaking off, and He told me I was something else... I was His, and that was all that mattered. He showed me what it was to breathe again... really breathe, like it was the first time life came in to my lungs and spread through my entire being.
For the first six months I stumbled like crazy. But by the end of 2012 I finally decided I had to give it all to Him. All I knew was that I wanted everything of my past to be so far from me, and everything about this amazing God before me. 2013 was mainly a year of restoration. I listened to online sermons, got connected to the right church, read my bible and also piles of Christian books because I wanted to know more about the God I so dearly loved. There has been so much pruning in the process.
I thought I was doing pretty well for myself when I had this moment at work recently. A toddler from another room was trying to go somewhere they shouldn't. So I kept side stepping in front of her and blocking her path before she could take the slightest step in the wrong direction. We were both laughing, but her laughter soon turned to frustrated outbursts. Then it just dawned on me... this is exactly the same thing God is doing with me at the moment, and I have the spiritual maturity of a toddler. So as far as this year goes... here's to more spiritual growth! Woo!
Three and a half years passed on and the only thing that changed was that I drank less and almost completely gave up self-mutilation. My mind was still on the same track regarding how I saw myself and the world.
Then over a year and a half ago, I gave my life to the Lord. My anxiety depression just seemed to be crushed to nothing under the pressure of His power and glory. And I came to realise that I was so dearly loved by One who pursued my heart with great intensity. God opened my eyes, and the world as I saw it began to fill with colour... He showed me something I thought I would never see or feel again: Hope. Through His word and His blood, the labels, ideas and words that seemed to define me were slowly breaking off, and He told me I was something else... I was His, and that was all that mattered. He showed me what it was to breathe again... really breathe, like it was the first time life came in to my lungs and spread through my entire being.
For the first six months I stumbled like crazy. But by the end of 2012 I finally decided I had to give it all to Him. All I knew was that I wanted everything of my past to be so far from me, and everything about this amazing God before me. 2013 was mainly a year of restoration. I listened to online sermons, got connected to the right church, read my bible and also piles of Christian books because I wanted to know more about the God I so dearly loved. There has been so much pruning in the process.
I thought I was doing pretty well for myself when I had this moment at work recently. A toddler from another room was trying to go somewhere they shouldn't. So I kept side stepping in front of her and blocking her path before she could take the slightest step in the wrong direction. We were both laughing, but her laughter soon turned to frustrated outbursts. Then it just dawned on me... this is exactly the same thing God is doing with me at the moment, and I have the spiritual maturity of a toddler. So as far as this year goes... here's to more spiritual growth! Woo!
How are you different now than you were five years ago? Removing self from nearly all of the important parts of life has been something of a challenge. A revelation of self-centeredness brought the realization of much more room to grow.
How have you grown? Less stress, more gratitude. Less fear, more faith. Love your husband. Believe in your children. Be blessed mightily by your grandchildren. Food is good. This is the day that Yahweh has made. Let us rejoice and be glad of it.
What important things do you know now that you didn't know then? It really is true. All of it. Genesis to Revelation. Walking in faith sometimes means saying, "I trust in you. I have some doubts about some of the things your book says. I will believe what you have written until you show me it is true." After a lifetime of searching, seeking, digging, reading, crying, and sometimes begging, I believe that I have seen the proof. Every single word is true. HalleluYah! (Big revelation. Got it. But some of us ask a lot of questions, that's all.)
What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of? Looking around is a world of creation that is astounding. In child like awe, each new rose, each blade of glass is a miracle. Each hummingbird is a gift, each pea pod is delicious and sweet, each ray of sun a moment to pause and give thanks. The softness of a purring kitten is wonderful to touch. Slow down. Appreciate. Breath. And for heaven's sake, start singing again. Pessimism fades in the glory of the kingdom that is to come.
How have you grown? Less stress, more gratitude. Less fear, more faith. Love your husband. Believe in your children. Be blessed mightily by your grandchildren. Food is good. This is the day that Yahweh has made. Let us rejoice and be glad of it.
What important things do you know now that you didn't know then? It really is true. All of it. Genesis to Revelation. Walking in faith sometimes means saying, "I trust in you. I have some doubts about some of the things your book says. I will believe what you have written until you show me it is true." After a lifetime of searching, seeking, digging, reading, crying, and sometimes begging, I believe that I have seen the proof. Every single word is true.
HalleluYah! (Big revelation. Got it. But some of us ask a lot of questions, that's all.)What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of? Looking around is a world of creation that is astounding. In child like awe, each new rose, each blade of glass is a miracle. Each hummingbird is a gift, each pea pod is delicious and sweet, each ray of sun a moment to pause and give thanks. The softness of a purring kitten is wonderful to touch. Slow down. Appreciate. Breath. And for heaven's sake, start singing again.
Pessimism fades in the glory of the kingdom that is to come.
How are you different now than you were five years ago? How have you grown?
I don't have such a huge chip on my shoulder anymore. I am more loving. I do take serious things more seriously now; I used to think that the world existed solely for my amusement. But there's far more joy to be found in trying to erase things, clean things up, propagate awesomeness, and be whatever God wants me to be.
What important things do you know now that you didn't know then?
I learned that sometimes, doing nothing is the hardest thing to do. That an answered prayer can hurt more than an unanswered one. I learned what worth means. I learned about having no limits in some areas of my life, and very strong limits in other areas.
I learned not to take responsibility for something that isn't my fault, and that there is a time to make no apologies. I discovered that trying to avoid regrets can lead to regret all on its own. I found out that I am loved more than I knew. I learned just how little some things mean to me, and how much others do. I learned that expectations can change reality.
I learned that warning bells are there for a reason, and sometimes all we need is for someone to tell us to listen to ourselves. I found out that I wasn't made of stone, like I thought I was. I learned that I can put up with an awful lot, but that doesn't mean that I should.
I learned about "empty" things that are actually full, and about looking for goodness and beauty even when they aren't the most obvious things around. I learned not to cast pearls before swine. I learned about pain, and the good that can come from it... which makes the pain not hurt as much. I learned that love cannot be so easily drowned.
What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of?
I am no longer as crushed by things which should not crush me. Some battles truly do not need to be fought, and I think I'm getting better at identifying them.
I trust Him more. And that has set off a chain reaction in my life that affected so many other things. There are many reasons why He told us to trust Him with all our hearts, souls, and minds.
I don't have such a huge chip on my shoulder anymore. I am more loving. I do take serious things more seriously now; I used to think that the world existed solely for my amusement. But there's far more joy to be found in trying to erase things, clean things up, propagate awesomeness, and be whatever God wants me to be.
What important things do you know now that you didn't know then?
I learned that sometimes, doing nothing is the hardest thing to do. That an answered prayer can hurt more than an unanswered one. I learned what worth means. I learned about having no limits in some areas of my life, and very strong limits in other areas.
I learned not to take responsibility for something that isn't my fault, and that there is a time to make no apologies. I discovered that trying to avoid regrets can lead to regret all on its own. I found out that I am loved more than I knew. I learned just how little some things mean to me, and how much others do. I learned that expectations can change reality.
I learned that warning bells are there for a reason, and sometimes all we need is for someone to tell us to listen to ourselves. I found out that I wasn't made of stone, like I thought I was. I learned that I can put up with an awful lot, but that doesn't mean that I should.
I learned about "empty" things that are actually full, and about looking for goodness and beauty even when they aren't the most obvious things around. I learned not to cast pearls before swine. I learned about pain, and the good that can come from it... which makes the pain not hurt as much. I learned that love cannot be so easily drowned.
What flaws in your character have you improved or mastered control of?
I am no longer as crushed by things which should not crush me. Some battles truly do not need to be fought, and I think I'm getting better at identifying them.
I trust Him more. And that has set off a chain reaction in my life that affected so many other things. There are many reasons why He told us to trust Him with all our hearts, souls, and minds.
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