Men, give us your definition please

[allforfun]

Here's a good example my pastor used on Father's Day-

To all the men in church that aren't forcing their children and/or grandchildren to attend: you are NOT the head of your household as you should be.

Men are responsible for their families, and that includes their spiritual well being. If you know your kids aren't in church on Sunday, you're failing. If your kids are on drugs, you're failing. If your kids are homeless or in bad relationships or can't find a job or whatever...you're failing.

THAT'S how much responsibility there is if you want to honestly be the 'head of the house.' It's not for slouches and there are no excuses.

God don't want no scrubs.

If I was a man and heard that at any message, I'd take a gun to myself afterwards.

That pastor has so missed the mark of what causes bad stuff to happen to and to simplify it to one singular thing? Just wow.

I don't even know what the phrase "God don't want no scrubs" means, but I do know mercy and grace comes into play more than what is preached in that message. I can't even imagine going to a church that doesn't offer the grace of God.

I know, I know you will say I'm much to soft and roll the people with over judgement. And I say meh.

 

[rainacorn]

Do you agree with what he said??

Because what of Children making their own decisions? This to me means that pretty much every father out there is a failure because every kid will eventually make poor choices.

I agree with what he said to a certain extent. I don't think men always take their job seriously and sometimes it takes...um...harsh words to drive that point home.

Our idea of what modern families are all about is so skewed, it's really hard to understand how serious God is about 'leading a house.' He's talking about genealogy! You're responsible for GENERATIONS.

Read about Noah. His "house" was his wife, his kids and his kid's spouses. His daughters-in-law thought Noah was batty and had nothing nice to say to him or about him... but they were part of his house. Their husbands took sides with their dad and as a result all of their lives were spared.

If I had been Noah and those women were talking smack about me and being jerks to me, I probably would've told them to learn to swim and had nothing else to do with them. But Noah is the head of that house... those people are his responsibility. They can complain and drag their feet and make their own decisions, but HIS responsibility is what it is.

There is a lot of focus on this forum on what it means to submit. We don't really talk about what it means to lead. THIS is what it means!

 

[rainacorn]

If I was a man and heard that at any message, I'd take a gun to myself afterwards.

That pastor has so missed the mark of what causes bad stuff to happen to and to simplify it to one singular thing? Just wow.

I don't even know what the phrase "God don't want no scrubs" means, but I do know mercy and grace comes into play more than what is preached in that message. I can't even imagine going to a church that doesn't offer the grace of God.

I know, I know you will say I'm much to soft and roll the people with over judgement. And I say meh.

Too soft? You just said you would end your own life if someone told you you're slacking on your responsibilities.

"Soft" isn't the right word for that.

Also, God don't want no scrubs means the responsibility God lays upon someone isn't for slouches. You have to step up your game and meet HIS expectations.

 

[allforfun]

Do you agree with what he said??

Because what of Children making their own decisions? This to me means that pretty much every father out there is a failure because every kid will eventually make poor choices.

I agree with you.

Homelessness, divorce, mortgage rates raising, bad performance at work, adultery, didn't get right order at Sonic? I had a crappy father and it isn't my fault!

This is so laughable I'm not even going to argue with it.

 

[rainacorn]

I agree with you.

Homelessness, divorce, mortgage rates raising, bad performance at work, adultery, didn't get right order at Sonic? I had a crappy father and it isn't my fault!

This is so laughable I'm not even going to argue with it.

My father wasn't a man of God either. He didn't lead his house.

Does that mean the whole concept is invalid?

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

If I was a man and heard that at any message, I'd take a gun to myself afterwards.

That pastor has so missed the mark of what causes bad stuff to happen to and to simplify it to one singular thing? Just wow.

I don't even know what the phrase "God don't want no scrubs" means, but I do know mercy and grace comes into play more than what is preached in that message. I can't even imagine going to a church that doesn't offer the grace of God.

I know, I know you will say I'm much to soft and roll the people with over judgement. And I say meh.

I agree with you, that was a really depressing message especially on fathers day. I probably would have sat there and felt like a total failure myself.

I understand sometimes it takes drastic words to get results, but to tell a parent he or she is a failure because of their child cant get a job?? Yeah thats a bit over the top in my opinion

 

[allforfun]

Too soft? You just said you would end your own life if someone told you you're slacking on your responsibilities.

"Soft" isn't the right word for that.

Also, God don't want no scrubs means the responsibility God lays upon someone isn't for slouches. You have to step up your game and meet HIS expectations.

No, soft means I believe in grace. He and you by extension by listening to being in his heard are spouting judgement on stuff that has nothing to do with each other. But? I now know because my father was crappy (and my parents were) that none if it is my fault. I suddenly feel better. I wonder if I can turn that in as my rent.............

 

[allforfun]

My father wasn't a man of God either. He didn't lead his house.

Does that mean the whole concept is invalid?

No, it means you get a free pass in life because you can blame your father. He failed. Your pastor said so.

To say otherwise? You would be backtracking.

 

[rainacorn]

No, soft means I believe in grace. He and you by extension by listening to being in his heard are spouting judgement on stuff that has nothing to do with each other. But? I now know because my father was crappy (and my parents were) that none if it is my fault. I suddenly feel better. I wonder if I can turn that in as my rent.............

I'll skip over you passing judgment on me, my pastor and my entire church and get right into what you're actually saying.

I agree that it isn't your fault that you had a bad father. HOWEVER, does that mean you shouldn't marry a godly man that will take that responsibility seriously? Does it mean you shouldn't marry a man that will actually lead his house as God wants Him to?

Stop thinking like a child and think like an adult. What kind of father do you want for your children?

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

I guess according to your Pastor my father is a failure, and my father is a pastor as well.

 

[rainacorn]

Ugh. I can't tell if I completely misrepresented this idea or if you two are feeding off each others offended hysteria.

I don't know why it's so hard to accept that some people fail in life in some areas. We're Christians. We all sin and fall short of the glory. We all need constant renewal.

Are you suggesting your father doesn't need that? Are you really saying that your father is perfect, never failed, never messed up, never made a mistake?

Come on.

Try and understand the concept before you start flipping out.

 

[allforfun]

I'll skip over you passing judgment on me, my pastor and my entire church and get right into what you're actually saying.

I agree that it isn't your fault that you had a bad father. HOWEVER, does that mean you shouldn't marry a godly man that will take that responsibility seriously? Does it mean you shouldn't marry a man that will actually lead his house as God wants Him to?

Stop thinking like a child and think like an adult. What kind of father do you want for your children?

That wasn't the message of the sermon. The message of the sermon was for fathers already existing. You are skirting the issue. So because we all had crappy fathers, we can blame our life issues on him. Because the sermon was, "homeless?! you failed! divorce?! you failed!" This wasn't a message about picking a husband, this was a message directed at the men in the pews already who already had children.

I realize I won't get you to see the problem with his message, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who does.

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

Ugh. I can't tell if I completely misrepresented this idea or if you two are feeding off each others offended hysteria.

I don't know why it's so hard to accept that some people fail in life in some areas. We're Christians. We all sin and fall short of the glory. We all need constant renewal.

Are you suggesting your father doesn't need that? Are you really saying that your father is perfect, never failed, never messed up, never made a mistake?

Come on.

Try and understand the concept before you start flipping out.

You are so dramatic. Bring it down a notch. We are talking to you about this, and it seems like you cant really handle it, so you throw out insults.

I will bow out of this, im afraid your nerves will crack... Much love rain

 

[rainacorn]

That wasn't the message of the sermon. The message of the sermon was for fathers already existing. You are skirting the issue. So because we all had crappy fathers, we can blame our life issues on him. Because the sermon was, "homeless?! you failed! divorce?! you failed!" This wasn't a message about picking a husband, this was a message directed at the men in the pews already who already had children.

I realize I won't get you to see the problem with his message, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who does.

That wasn't the entire sermon... just the dramatic part. He didn't stand up there for 45 minutes listing all the different ways fathers are failures.

The point of it was that men don't take their responsibilities seriously. Too many of them act like once their kids have moved out of the house, they're no longer accountable or responsible. Maybe you agree with that, but that's not Biblical.

 

[Pheonix]

while the children are children the responsibility is the parents, but once they become old enough to make decisions for themselves, the responsibility slides to the child. The problem is that in our society you aren't considered an adult until you are 18. In the societies that are in the bible it was 12-14 (ex. bar mitzva) we live in an age where adults behave like children and children insist they be treated like adults. Its a disaster no matter how you look aat it.

the parents responsibility is to give there children a firm foundation on which to build their future lives and beliefs. If the children refuse to accept it, that is not the parents fault. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.

 

[allforfun]

Yeah, I will give hand it back to you and say, hope you enjoyed the feel good message of Father's Day. I wonder what Mother's Day was? If you had to have a C-section, you should confess your sins and be a take your role as a woman more seriously?

I think people, including fathers should be accountable for their actions and responsibilities. On the same token, I know enough about life to know that sometimes bad things happen, even to families that are in shelters as we speak and if the pastor turned to them and said "you failed" instead of saying "Jesus loves you", they would probably shoot themselves instead of coming to know Jesus.

I am on the edge of my seat to see what next feel good message comes from the pulpit so I can know whether I should get out of bed on Monday or not.

 

[rainacorn]

Yeah, I will give hand it back to you and say, hope you enjoyed the feel good message of Father's Day. I wonder what Mother's Day was? If you had to have a C-section, you should confess your sins and be a take your role as a woman more seriously?

I think people, including fathers should be accountable for their actions and responsibilities. On the same token, I know enough about life to know that sometimes bad things happen, even to families that are in shelters as we speak and if the pastor turned to them and said "you failed" instead of saying "Jesus loves you", they would probably shoot themselves instead of coming to know Jesus.

I am on the edge of my seat to see what next feel good message comes from the pulpit so I can know whether I should get out of bed on Monday or not.

lol

wow this is getting really ridiculous. You must go to one of those churches that just tickles your ears and tells you what you want to hear.

I don't go to a feel good church that just wants me to know Jesus loves me. I go to a church that wants me to know Jesus loves me enough to make me better.

Anyway, you've gone way off the topic now and you're just being insulting. I'll walk away from this thread now. See yas.

 

[Pheonix]

lol

wow this is getting really ridiculous. You must go to one of those churches that just tickles your ears and tells you what you want to hear.

I don't go to a feel good church that just wants me to know Jesus loves me. I go to a church that wants me to know Jesus loves me enough to make me better.

Anyway, you've gone way off the topic now and you're just being insulting. I'll walk away from this thread now. See yas.

okay people we are rapidly getting into a bad case of my dad is better than your dad. Might I suggest that we drop the subject before we start throwing ice cream at each other?

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

okay people we are rapidly getting into a bad case of my dad is better than your dad. Might I suggest that we drop the subject before we start throwing ice cream at each other?

We've done dropped it, about 22 minutes ago actually... where have you been at???

 

[zeroturbulence]

This thread really needs an Intermission. Enjoy!

Fresh mini strawberry cheesecakes for everyone!