Relationships advice please?

[Lexie0]

You don't need a boyfriend, except as a step toward getting married. Get involved socially in places where there are Christians, like church activities so hopefully you can meet a Christian man. The abuse issues? That's something to pray about and maybe get help with. if you really start developing a relationship with a man who is interested in you, you'll need to let him know about that before there is a proposal.

I appreciate your answer. However I'm not actually looking for a boyfriend per say. I just used the term because I guess it's more commom than "husband" or "fiance"?
I do get involved in church activities. It would actually be great if I could find that special guy in church, but it can't be the only place to look for a good husband right?. I think I will be limiting myself.

Now, I don't know about the part where I have to let him about what happened Before there is a proposal. I wouldn't want to scare him off. It will probably come out one way or another but I don't know if Before a proposal is the right time.

But anyway, thanks for your input.

 

[Liamson]

I've encountered similar things before.

Once does not become a person's husband without first being friends, girlfriend, Relationship of your LIFE.... first.


If you don't want to be a man's (a man like me for example) girlfriend, you certainly will never be his wife.






this is me. Liamson.
In my experience, its best to consider marriage, love, a man, etc. after you have met a man and find him worthy of those titles to you. Marriage is a subjective institution.

Seeking to find someone to crown as husband of your heart, is going to hurt or end badly permanently. If you are hunting for a husband, for the merit of finding a marriage, beware of who you will find.

Sandcastles are built in a day.
Real ones take much more time and effort.

Start from the beginning.
Learn to trust a man worthy of trust.
piece by piece
grow together
step by step
stay together


Remember what mama said....
[video=youtube;fQ7uXX9K7Sk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQ7uXX9K7Sk[/video]

 

[Powemm]

"who" is the reflection you see coming out of the person you're interested in?
Do they talk as christ talks to you?
Do they treat you as Christ treats you?
Do they care for you as Christ cares for you?
Do you hear the same thoughts God give you?
What are the fruits of the spirit you see in them ?
Love ? Joy? Peace? Patience? Kindness? Honesty? Consistency?

How's their relationship in Christ going ? are they growing in it? Do they spend time strengthening their own relationship with God?

if youre fleeing From something it could be the spirit in you not recognizing the peaceable attributes of the spirit in another person trying to enter your life .. you're fleeing for a reason .. perhaps a real good understanding of Gods love and character
can bring an assurance .. so there's no confusion whatsoever when it cones to your future .. I know it has made all the difference in my life .,

 

[MissCris]

I actually do know who I am in christ. Like I said, I've been a christian for a long time, though I did backslide; but I'm OK now. I don't have to get into the details of what my christian life looks like at this moment, but am I getting the feeling that you are judging me and thinking that I'm not focused enough on God.
I'm not sure what your situation is, but I believe this is more like a phase that most girls around my age go through. When you feel like you have settled down career wise, you would usually long for something else; and since I'm lacking experience on this other aspect of life, I would like to get some advice from people.

Well, thanks for your input.

I'm sorry it seemed like I was judging you, because I honestly wasn't. I'm not going to go into the reasons why I have absolutely no right to be judging anyone, but let's just say, I've been there. I was raised Christian, baptized when I was 16, and did some pretty major "back sliding" myself up until just a few years ago.

So no, I absolutely am not judging you for anything you've shared here.

I don't know a thing about your relationship with God; but I don't think it's ever bad advice to recommend someone put more focus on Him.

You seem like you're kind of annoyed with the advice/suggestions that you received here. I'm sorry if nobody has been able to tell you what it is you were hoping to hear.

 

[presidente]

I appreciate your answer. However I'm not actually looking for a boyfriend per say. I just used the term because I guess it's more commom than "husband" or "fiance"?
I do get involved in church activities. It would actually be great if I could find that special guy in church, but it can't be the only place to look for a good husband right?. I think I will be limiting myself.

Now, I don't know about the part where I have to let him about what happened Before there is a proposal. I wouldn't want to scare him off. It will probably come out one way or another but I don't know if Before a proposal is the right time.

But anyway, thanks for your input.

If you start getting close to each other emotionally and start talking about marriage, you should let him know things about yourself that will effect your future marriage together. We all have things about ourselves we think another person might not like, or might even reject us over. You want to put those fears to rest before he decides he wants to marry you.

You should tell those things before he proposes, gets down on one knee, talks to your dad, or whatever they do in your country. It's a lot better if he knows everything you think he needs to know before engagement so you won't be concerned that he'll break it off at that stage if you do tell him, and you don't take any secrets into marriage.

Church isn't the only place to meet men. If I were single and looking though, i might go to midweek night services when I am not at my own church to meet more people. You can meet godly men outside of church, but if you just date and get serious with random men who meet you at coffee shops, or worse bars or nightclubs, statistically speaking the chances of ending up with a godly man are slimmer.

Some of the online dating sites probably let you search by religion. You can always look for keywords in a website using the site: command followed by the web page on Google. You could search for 'loves God' or something like that when looking through profiles.