The Banned Game
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Norway...
well actually I had a bit of family crisis/tribulation as everyone does but its ok now praise the Lord...!
Im sure people thought I was banned, but I keep coming back, like some kind of unbannable being. As they say, like Jesus you cant keep a good man down.
Lanolinland newspapers and social media always have this recurrent disappearing kiwi act where they say the kiwis are all going to be extinct in a few years because they cant fly when they just really hiding underground and actually they have been breeding like rabbits and will soon pop up and take over the world...every country will have one, and they will be even more revered than flying pigs and unicorns.
well actually I had a bit of family crisis/tribulation as everyone does but its ok now praise the Lord...!
Im sure people thought I was banned, but I keep coming back, like some kind of unbannable being. As they say, like Jesus you cant keep a good man down.
Lanolinland newspapers and social media always have this recurrent disappearing kiwi act where they say the kiwis are all going to be extinct in a few years because they cant fly when they just really hiding underground and actually they have been breeding like rabbits and will soon pop up and take over the world...every country will have one, and they will be even more revered than flying pigs and unicorns.
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President Lanolin asked Thor is he was seeing anybody else, but he avoided the question. He seemed to be quite secretive and she wondered just what was in his freezer. Since there was no sunshine or fresh food to be had, every day Thor bought out something new to be defrosted for dinner.
One day it was salmon, another it was prawns, and for dessert, blueberries and ice cream. President Lanolin was only going to worry if he served up frozen pizza, then she knew he would be reaching rock bottom.
One day it was salmon, another it was prawns, and for dessert, blueberries and ice cream. President Lanolin was only going to worry if he served up frozen pizza, then she knew he would be reaching rock bottom.
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There was a big shake up in Lanolinland, and King Mittens decided that he didn't want to deal with any new govt. He merely wanted to be adored. If you gave him lots of pats and Fancy Feast, he was happy, and was not interested where or how that came about.
Kevin knew better than to fill Kings Mittens head with any details about anything that was concerning running the country. As far as he was concerned, the country could run itself. As long as King Mittens did not set foot in the South Island, he was safe, as that part of the country had gone to the dogs.
Meanwhile President Lanolin was busy securing jars of pickled herrings so that King Mittens could have a lifetime supply from Norway.
Kevin knew better than to fill Kings Mittens head with any details about anything that was concerning running the country. As far as he was concerned, the country could run itself. As long as King Mittens did not set foot in the South Island, he was safe, as that part of the country had gone to the dogs.
Meanwhile President Lanolin was busy securing jars of pickled herrings so that King Mittens could have a lifetime supply from Norway.
The exiles that had been banned from various countries decided that, because they were such misfits they would just get on with it, as in South America, and simply party.
Nobody asked each other questions like why are you here, what crimes against humanity have you done?
It was decided that, instead of making themselves miserable and think of their nefarious deeds and repenting, they would just start life over again in a banana republic, and Shittimstan was THE Banana republic central.
Mrs Hairy was so happy that everyone wanted to migrate to her country. She was feeling a bit lonely now that her children had grown up and flown the banana tree nest.
Nobody asked each other questions like why are you here, what crimes against humanity have you done?
It was decided that, instead of making themselves miserable and think of their nefarious deeds and repenting, they would just start life over again in a banana republic, and Shittimstan was THE Banana republic central.
Mrs Hairy was so happy that everyone wanted to migrate to her country. She was feeling a bit lonely now that her children had grown up and flown the banana tree nest.
Ms Jenny was worried. Her damsel in distress performance hadn’t caught the attention of the right crowd. “Pretty Woman” wasn’t about her and Roy Orbison was long gone. She had no heir to the throne and the only suitor around was the Duke of Mare Terrible. A most unpleasant man. He had sworn to marry Ms Jenny regardless of her opinion of the subject.
She put on “Pretty Woman” for the fifth time that evening. In her imagination she was strolling down the sidewalk in a dashing dress while the “right” crowd was head over heels in love with her. Suddenly the dream was broken because Belly-Ann entered on the scene. It took her a few seconds to roundup Ms Jenny’s admirers and off they went. Ms Jenny pitched a fit a stormed out of the room to stir up some controversy in the strategy room. Why haven’t we invaded any countries this year? she demanded. The generals cleared their tobacco ridden voices. My lady, your last little war forced us into a humiliating peace treaty with the Mosestarian regime. Our Constitution is now denying us any aggression against our neighboring countries. So we have become a country of peace loving pot smoking hippies? Well, what about our industry. Taken over by the Chinese, one teapot shaped colonel informed.
Ms Jenny turned around so abruptly that her stilettos made two marks in the floor before she made her way out of the room as fast as her shoes allowed her to.
She was fuming behind her desk made of mahogany from some jungle in South America. She tried calling Captain America, both of them, but neither of them could any longer remember her, nor could they remember being Captain America. And Henry Kissinger was dead. She was brought back to reality by the ringing of the phone. She offered a weak hello. This is Henry Kissinger, the voice said. Nice try, but he’s dead, Ms Jenny said sarcastically. But I won’t lie down, the voice went on.
She put on “Pretty Woman” for the fifth time that evening. In her imagination she was strolling down the sidewalk in a dashing dress while the “right” crowd was head over heels in love with her. Suddenly the dream was broken because Belly-Ann entered on the scene. It took her a few seconds to roundup Ms Jenny’s admirers and off they went. Ms Jenny pitched a fit a stormed out of the room to stir up some controversy in the strategy room. Why haven’t we invaded any countries this year? she demanded. The generals cleared their tobacco ridden voices. My lady, your last little war forced us into a humiliating peace treaty with the Mosestarian regime. Our Constitution is now denying us any aggression against our neighboring countries. So we have become a country of peace loving pot smoking hippies? Well, what about our industry. Taken over by the Chinese, one teapot shaped colonel informed.
Ms Jenny turned around so abruptly that her stilettos made two marks in the floor before she made her way out of the room as fast as her shoes allowed her to.
She was fuming behind her desk made of mahogany from some jungle in South America. She tried calling Captain America, both of them, but neither of them could any longer remember her, nor could they remember being Captain America. And Henry Kissinger was dead. She was brought back to reality by the ringing of the phone. She offered a weak hello. This is Henry Kissinger, the voice said. Nice try, but he’s dead, Ms Jenny said sarcastically. But I won’t lie down, the voice went on.
Ms Mariah Carey sat on her throne in her musical mansion. It was that time of year again when both the Chipmunks and the Chippettes would make a personal appearance for her two children who liked their version of All I want for Christmas better than their mum's.
Then she came across a fan comment on her website, the buzz was about 'Oh pretty woman' and that Ms Carey should lend her chops to that Orbison classic or maybe star in the video. Oh I already did 'Oh Santa!' sighed Mariah. I can't sing everything.
Then she came across a fan comment on her website, the buzz was about 'Oh pretty woman' and that Ms Carey should lend her chops to that Orbison classic or maybe star in the video. Oh I already did 'Oh Santa!' sighed Mariah. I can't sing everything.
