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Like Zero I haven't had the issue with female friends disappearing after marriage, however I've had plenty of male friends vanish after marriage. I will agree that it can be a struggle to not take it personally at times, but I do understand that marriage will appropriately focus a person's attention on their spouse. I guess it's the curse of a single person to have to find new friends from time to time.
J
That's part of it, Gabe, and that's TRULY awesome, but there's a little more to it.
Example: You are friends with a lady and a man who don't know one another. They meet. They get married. The guy has to unfriend you and you aren't sure why, but the woman doesn't.
You're happy for them because they are amazing together, and you rarely talk with them anyway, so it's not a HUGE deal, but it still kinda makes you feel wierd to know that someone had to cut you out of their life. Does that make sense?
I've had women friends whose husbands didn't want them to be friends with single ladies anymore either though, so I suppose it's no different.
It's just a wierd feeling...as if being a single person was like having a disease or something...
Example: You are friends with a lady and a man who don't know one another. They meet. They get married. The guy has to unfriend you and you aren't sure why, but the woman doesn't.
You're happy for them because they are amazing together, and you rarely talk with them anyway, so it's not a HUGE deal, but it still kinda makes you feel wierd to know that someone had to cut you out of their life. Does that make sense?
I've had women friends whose husbands didn't want them to be friends with single ladies anymore either though, so I suppose it's no different.
It's just a wierd feeling...as if being a single person was like having a disease or something...
S
Nah, to me it simply is the way it should be Jullianna. Women are very jealous creatures and therefore I would not feel comfortable being friends with a married man. Even when we (my fiance and I) share a friendship with a man I always keep a part of me reserved because my heart tells me it is the right thing to do. That is a line that you just do not want to cross. He is a smart man to give up his friendships with single women. Its a good way for him to keep a happy home. Think about it...if you were married would you want your husband to continue on his friendships with single women?
Yeah, I think it depends on the person.
I think perhaps the form of the friendship may change - especially if there is a single lady who say gets engaged who I am friends with. I may not go as deep with my questions or ask different ones. I don't think there is a need to cut them out, though, I can see why people do so sometimes.
One of my friends is doing this (getting married and disappearing) atm.
Kind of funny...
I think perhaps the form of the friendship may change - especially if there is a single lady who say gets engaged who I am friends with. I may not go as deep with my questions or ask different ones. I don't think there is a need to cut them out, though, I can see why people do so sometimes.
One of my friends is doing this (getting married and disappearing) atm.
Kind of funny...
J
I was trying to understand why it felt so wierd and the best I can explain it is that you kinda feel as if people you really felt close to no longer trust you just because you're single. It's a very creepy feeling because you feel as if they should know your dedication to the Lord and know you better...then you discover they don't.
The thing is, maybe it's not a matter of insecurity on her part, but one of perceived respect for his wife on his part. I know that when I'm in a committed relationship, I tend to pull away from female friends (more so if my significant other doesn't know the lady) because I wouldn't want anyone to think there was any hanky panky going on.
The surprising thing is that after having had two women cheat on me in my life, I haven't developed the insecurity and possessiveness in relationships that many do.
The surprising thing is that after having had two women cheat on me in my life, I haven't developed the insecurity and possessiveness in relationships that many do.
I think this is something that shows you who your true family or friends are.
My elder siblings & their friends, who became family friends, found a spouse & moved away.
You can try to reachout to them but you hear a few silent words between them as your friend covers up the phone or steps into the next room. They talk & you realise they're busy again. So I just let them know, invite me whenever & you're welcome whenever.
Can you say you know your friends so deeply that they wouldn't change when a new soul enters their life?
I thank God for all the people I meet & the opportunities I had with each of them, & I pray The Lord will direct their path.
My elder siblings & their friends, who became family friends, found a spouse & moved away.
You can try to reachout to them but you hear a few silent words between them as your friend covers up the phone or steps into the next room. They talk & you realise they're busy again. So I just let them know, invite me whenever & you're welcome whenever.
Can you say you know your friends so deeply that they wouldn't change when a new soul enters their life?
I thank God for all the people I meet & the opportunities I had with each of them, & I pray The Lord will direct their path.
C
I can understand why a guy, out of respect for his new wife, would distance himself from female friends that he had before marriage. The last thing you want to do is sow seeds of doubt in your wife's mind of unfaithfulness. I guess the best way to deal with this would be to inform / include your new wife in any interaction that you have with such friends.
However, I'm a bit puzzled as to why a guy would forbid his wife to see her single friends. Personally I have no problem at all with my wife spending time with her friends. Both males and females can use an occassional time out just to hang out with friends. Now if those friends were always trying to convince my wife to go out dancing, clubbing, etc. placing herself in a situation where interaction with single men are inevitable, then I would take issue with that. I would be concerned if my wife wanted to involve herself in such activities without me involved.
However, I'm a bit puzzled as to why a guy would forbid his wife to see her single friends. Personally I have no problem at all with my wife spending time with her friends. Both males and females can use an occassional time out just to hang out with friends. Now if those friends were always trying to convince my wife to go out dancing, clubbing, etc. placing herself in a situation where interaction with single men are inevitable, then I would take issue with that. I would be concerned if my wife wanted to involve herself in such activities without me involved.