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C
Who told you that? (in read).
I started to believe the more you try TO FIND HIM, the less you see him.
God is not blind at all to bring him ther, where you are.
View attachment 83690
I started to believe the more you try TO FIND HIM, the less you see him.
God is not blind at all to bring him ther, where you are.
View attachment 83690
AMEN! I believe on that.
C
I am also very independent. I am proud that I can take care of myself. At 33, I don't NEED a man around, but I would LIKE to have a man around. However, it's always been important to me to be able to take care of myself and not have to rely on someone. I know too many women who can't (or haven't tried to) take care of themselves, so they've been in and out of relationships since they left high school.
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
I am also very independent. I am proud that I can take care of myself. At 33, I don't NEED a man around, but I would LIKE to have a man around. However, it's always been important to me to be able to take care of myself and not have to rely on someone. I know too many women who can't (or haven't tried to) take care of themselves, so they've been in and out of relationships since they left high school.
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
Being involved with a needy woman, one who could simply pretend she is (or was) like that, can be easily faked and, a man who likes to feel he is needed, economically or emotionally important and sought for that, is goofying at himself, he is deceived by what he thinks is best (just for HIS convenience and stronghold).
I rather like INTER-dependence and, by the way, it´s almost 2 months I re-learned it well.
Regarding children: I agree with you! The sad thing is hearing women (or men) who got their children telling them "your mom is like a female dog" or "your dad is like a dog". In the long wrong their trust will be affected, their relationships are all torn and, it takes years to get recovered. I know it 1st hand and I have lots of personal friends who are dealing with the emotional isolation their parents set, as a jail in their hearts. It´s not telling children: "Your dad doesn´t love you, because he gives you no money". It´s also children are hindered developing a real time relationship with those who have loved them (the way they could) and the law "helped" to isolate children their mom´s or dad´s resentments and blames, so they (those kids) have learned: "I don´t deserve to live! My mom (or my father) doesn´t love me. I hate myself, I hate the world, and I WILL TRUST NOBODY".
It´s easy to grasp consequences in time. I vasectomized to spare me more trouble.
C
I completely agree! Thanks for putting it into words!
I don't pretend I need him. I just remember that I don't always have to be so independent and strong. It's ok to let him take care of me. It's ok to open up and show my vulnerable side. That's what I have to keep reminding myself. I don't have to take everything on all by myself.
I don't pretend I need him. I just remember that I don't always have to be so independent and strong. It's ok to let him take care of me. It's ok to open up and show my vulnerable side. That's what I have to keep reminding myself. I don't have to take everything on all by myself.
S
I am also very independent. I am proud that I can take care of myself. At 33, I don't NEED a man around, but I would LIKE to have a man around. However, it's always been important to me to be able to take care of myself and not have to rely on someone. I know too many women who can't (or haven't tried to) take care of themselves, so they've been in and out of relationships since they left high school.
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
I find that men are attracted to my independence....well, they think they are. They've had needy women and are initially attracted to me because I can take care of myself. But then I think they change their minds. Men seem to be programmed to be needed, so I've definitely tried to show the new man in my life that I do need him.
The other reason I'm single? Partly because I am afraid to end up like so many other people as a single mom sharing custody with her ex. I work with children everyday, and I am so tired of seeing them pushed and pulled in all directions between parents. :-(
Hi, again, CountryROSE!
The 1st thing we learned at home is trying to be independant. Parents were there to teach us to be like that (they did it well in you, as I see).
On the other side, I don´t see it as vulnerable or weak allowing other to show those cares and attentions. If fact, I think assuming those tendencies show who we are and what genuinely we wanted, as a committed partner. I have seen (and enjoyed) times when I was less independent, even to the point my last ex-gf insisted too much on cutting my hair or shaving my whole body, but THAT made me feel I was not my own, soon after a person like that starts to demand things you don´t want to give up or share, and any normal single may feel "I´m loosing my rights or freedom".
I also need that reminder you´ve probably intended to mention, and it´s a good experiment to learn it with the person who is willing to learn about being inter-dependant, acknowledging personal limitations, fears, lacks and those things alike.
The 1st thing we learned at home is trying to be independant. Parents were there to teach us to be like that (they did it well in you, as I see).
On the other side, I don´t see it as vulnerable or weak allowing other to show those cares and attentions. If fact, I think assuming those tendencies show who we are and what genuinely we wanted, as a committed partner. I have seen (and enjoyed) times when I was less independent, even to the point my last ex-gf insisted too much on cutting my hair or shaving my whole body, but THAT made me feel I was not my own, soon after a person like that starts to demand things you don´t want to give up or share, and any normal single may feel "I´m loosing my rights or freedom".
I also need that reminder you´ve probably intended to mention, and it´s a good experiment to learn it with the person who is willing to learn about being inter-dependant, acknowledging personal limitations, fears, lacks and those things alike.
J
got the D finalized in Jan. After a 19 year relationship, last 12 were stupid. but my girl, who is 13 now, is with me. And i'm happy. A bit lonely sometimes, but kind of used to it. Our marriage went from great, to secrecy/games, to terrible. So overall I'm much much happier. But I do wish I had a new lady in my life...Someday...
I have so much love to give, yet I have ended up around the wrong people. But praying my future is much brighter and better.
I have so much love to give, yet I have ended up around the wrong people. But praying my future is much brighter and better.