Would you marry a non-Christian if you just loved the person sooo much?

[A-miss-Saved-by-GRACE]

Okay so marrying a non Christian.

What does GOD say. In context. Context very very important.
GOD says no and gives reasons why in the following versus.
2 Corinthians 6
14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?
16 What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
17 Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you,
18 and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty."

Grace and Peace in CHRIST
Kylie

 

[Nefti]

If God says so, it's because He wants to protects us from pain. I can assure you, a Christian cannot live happily forever with a non-believer. I think, if you love someone who is not Christian, pray for him/her until He finds him/her, but never get marry.
And if someone says is Christian, please! first look at his/her testimony, don't just settle he/she is just because he/she says so, "by their fruits ye shall know them".

 

[RickShafer]

Did you say, - "If you loved them sooooooo much"?
(I'm sure God will take that into account........)
Sounds like soul over spirit.
"Isn't she nice" - (meaning doesn't she look nice - beautiful to behold)
"Doesn't she have promise" - (meaning doesn't her looks promise to fulfill your carnal desires)
"Doesn't God, after all, love her too?!?!?!?! - ( Meaning, won't God acquiesce to your carnal desires?)
"Does not that fruit look good to touch?"
"Does not that fruit look good to eat?"
Taste of it.
And feel the sting of a poisoning adder sinking deeply into your soul.
20 minutes tops before the poison causes lethargy, 20 more before it reaches your heart,....(and it stops beating).

 

[AgapeSpiritEyes]

Here is what some Scripture says on the matter:

1 Corinthians 7

39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. 40 In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is—and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.


Any questions?

What great chasm spiritually one has agape the other does not, one has the greatest desire to follow the Lord the other has no desire, one is submitted to the will and directivesof the Lord the other does not. One has the desire to forfiet their lfe for the Lord the other does not.
What union what harmony what intimacy? Seems an insurmountable distance how can two walk together if one is spiritually dead and the other is spiritually filled, one will have to compromise the other may or may not eventually one will not agree and walk away this even happens to those in the Lord because they are in different degrees of spiritual commitment or maturity and flesh or spiritual willingness or unwillingness causes a breach in the willingness of the vow, '"death will only be our departure."

 

[GreenNnice]

Would I? Yes, I would, with NO hesitation marry a non-Christian, as I said, IF you read my attraction vs affection thread, I am, firstly and foremost, about 'attraction,' what a girl shows me affectionately does not win out, to me, over her looks. Plain and pure. Simple. Do I lose friends on c.c. for saying that? Hope not. But, sure, I WOULD, i do, that's, but, but, however NOT my Spirit breathed into me from God when I was born green speaking. Really, green ? Really, I was born that way OK, seriously, I was born green , but, remember, I'm 'nice,' too, but, OK, already, seriously-seriously, my flesh may be in me at grisly work (it is! And, WAKE UP! It is in you, too . Read Paul in Romans, chap. 6,7, for my digression, we are...


...COVERED by the blood. Sins past, zeroturbbuddy, sins present, sins future, all, COVERED by the blood.
We WERE enemies of God-- read Zechariah, the last book of the OT, Christ peeps--until God sent His Son to die for what? For who? By what?

For what? Our sins.
For who? For ALL sinners. For Christians and non-Christians alike, even though their cut is a swath that only God, by His Spirit leading, can cure (together), like bacon, or, tenderly corner, like beef. !!!!!!!


But, would God lead us into a relationship that was NOT from Him, and, His Word speaks Truth, in fact John 1 tells us Jesus IS the Word in the flesh. Hmmmm....

But, IF God got me attracted to a non-Christian, we went out and I was affixed of her, agape, with affection rooting, would I get to point of commitment of giving her an engagement ring? Yes.

Would I continue going out with her, with a wedding date set in stone, right up to the day of the wedding, praying, praying, praying for something of God unto her happening, praying to 'Thy will be done,' so in love with her, so in love ! Sooo in love WITH HER !!! BUT, would I at the day, THE DAY, marry her. The Lord leads.... Scripture, Spirit leading me, I praying, profusely sweating, GONNA GIVE this non-Christian a ring !! '...you follow Me.' John 21:22) , sooo, sooo, in love ???????


No. I would, the Lord leads, I CAN CONVERT HER in marriage, I can, Lord. No, I would not.

 

[jimmydiggs]

It would at the very least be un-wise to do so. It would be very near to sin (if not a sin), given that scripture commands us not to.

 

[quickfire]

In that case, I beg you to consider prenups as well.

Do you mean get a written contract in place first before the marriage ?.

Is that changing the will of god? : i mean all that i have is yours so to speak.

 

[Nike]

You know people say these things and on the surface it may appear that they share the same values, but I feel like, once you scratch the surface major cracks will appear.

For starts I would wonder if the Non Christian would like the kids going to church EVERY weekend, he would want to do things occasionally. In addition to this, what happens when the kids turn 12 and decide they don't want to? You can't really drag them by the ear if the Non Christian spouse isn't supportive.

In addition to this, is the Non Christian going to enjoy where you spend your time? If you don't have as much time for him/her because you are always doing church things, bible study every week, constantly involved in ministry and preaching to people.

What about money? I feel like Christians in the West are often very... unwise and sometimes uncaring in the way they spend their money. What happens when you start wanting to donate 10%, 20%, 30%, 50% 75% of your income to charity? I don't think they are going to enjoy it when, instead of going on an expensive holiday to Europe you decide to donate that money overseas and go to a caravan park for the weekend instead...

What if you ever feel like you should go somewhere because of the gospel? To support a church, to help out somewhere? Being a missionary is off the cards and I doubt your spouse will want to go with you elsewhere.

Not to mention the lack of encouragement, the lack of understanding in relation to your faith. What if you got hurt in a church, and it will probably happen to most of us at some point. Instead of being told to persevere he/she might just go 'just stop going, you've got me.'"

If you are married you want to be working as a team, going in the same direction... If one person is heading towards God and the other away from him, I don't see why you would make the choice to marry them.

Once the commitment is made it's a different thing, but considering these things?

No... I'd rather a Christian any day. And a Christian prepared to make some sacrifices.

Also, are you sure that you would stay in faith and love for Jesus, and not stray away with your spouse? (for example: we usually wanna do things with our spouse, right? what if on a weekend, the spouse wanna do some activity that you would wanna do it too, but that means you wouldn't go to church? etc)
I believe that our choice of spouse is so highly critical that it affects if we are gonna go home as a christian or not so christian... God spits out the lukewarm.

 

[progressivenerdgirl]

Absolutely not. I will NOT be under the authority of a pagan, and I will NOT have my children under the authority of a Pagan. There is just no way to have a good family without a Christian man at the head.

 

[Stuey]

You have some fire in your progressive.

Are you a red head?

 

[progressivenerdgirl]

You have some fire in your progressive.

Are you a red head?

That would be a miracle on it's own. Black/brown. I'm of East Asian descent.

 

[Nautilus]

Absolutely not. I will NOT be under the authority of a pagan, and I will NOT have my children under the authority of a Pagan. There is just no way to have a good family without a Christian man at the head.

A bit harsh and overly judgmental, I know plenty of loving successful families that aren't christian

 

[progressivenerdgirl]

A bit harsh and overly judgmental, I know plenty of loving successful families that aren't christian

Without God and the Biblical standards a family will suffer. Sure, everyone has 'the law written on their hearts' - not all pagans are serial killers. But they are offending God by misleading children and breaking his commandments, and they will inevitably face issues insoluable without the Lord and his Word.

But instead of sharing my general thoughts, let's get down to brass tacks. What does the Bible say about marriage between different religions?

Deuteronomy 7:3-4

"Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, for they will turn your sons away from following me to serve other gods, and the LORD's anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you."

1 Kings 11:2, 9

They were from nations about which the LORD had told the Israelites, "You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods." Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love.... verse 9 The LORD became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from the LORD, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice.

God uses His middle knowledge to warn people. If you put yourself into a given circumstance, you will do this. God knew what would happen if the Israelites intermarried. He knew what the foreign wives would do and how the Israelites would respond. Sadly, Solomon didn't listen.

On divine determinism, God's foreknowledge is logically "too late" to serve as a warning. All (even the hypothetical - if you intermarry, you will fall away) is determined by God. So 1 Kings 11 turns into "I told you I determined you would fall" as opposed to "I told you you would fall".

It may be that your own, human reason is incapable of finding why this prohibition exists - it might seem 'unfair' or 'harsh'. But it is not Man who sets the standards, makes the rules, or knows all things - it's God. And he's given us our marching orders (which are, in reality, a blessing).

 

[GreenNnice]

Would I? Yes, I would, with NO hesitation marry a non-Christian, as I said, IF you read my attraction vs affection thread, I am, firstly and foremost, about 'attraction,' what a girl shows me affectionately does not win out, to me, over her looks. Plain and pure. Simple. Do I lose friends on c.c. for saying that? Hope not. But, sure, I WOULD, i do, that's, but, but, however NOT my Spirit breathed into me from God when I was born green speaking. Really, green ? Really, I was born that way OK, seriously, I was born green , but, remember, I'm 'nice,' too, but, OK, already, seriously-seriously, my flesh may be in me at grisly work (it is! And, WAKE UP! It is in you, too . Read Paul in Romans, chap. 6,7, for my digression, we are...


...COVERED by the blood. Sins past, zeroturbbuddy, sins present, sins future, all, COVERED by the blood.
We WERE enemies of God-- read Zechariah, the last book of the OT, Christ peeps--until God sent His Son to die for what? For who? By what?

For what? Our sins.
For who? For ALL sinners. For Christians and non-Christians alike, even though their cut is a swath that only God, by His Spirit leading, can cure (together), like bacon, or, tenderly corner, like beef. !!!!!!!


But, would God lead us into a relationship that was NOT from Him, and, His Word speaks Truth, in fact John 1 tells us Jesus IS the Word in the flesh. Hmmmm....

But, IF God got me attracted to a non-Christian, we went out and I was affixed of her, agape, with affection rooting, would I get to point of commitment of giving her an engagement ring? Yes.

Would I continue going out with her, with a wedding date set in stone, right up to the day of the wedding, praying, praying, praying for something of God unto her happening, praying to 'Thy will be done,' so in love with her, so in love ! Sooo in love WITH HER !!! BUT, would I at the day, THE DAY, marry her. The Lord leads.... Scripture, Spirit leading me, I praying, profusely sweating, GONNA GIVE this non-Christian a ring !! '...you follow Me.' John 21:22) , sooo, sooo, in love ???????


No. I would, the Lord leads, I CAN CONVERT HER in marriage, I can, Lord. No, I would not.

Also, are you sure that you would stay in faith and love for Jesus, and not stray away with your spouse? (for example: we usually wanna do things with our spouse, right? what if on a weekend, the spouse wanna do some activity that you would wanna do it too, but that means you wouldn't go to church? etc)
I believe that our choice of spouse is so highly critical that it affects if we are gonna go home as a christian or not so christian... God spits out the lukewarm.

Without God and the Biblical standards a family will suffer. Sure, everyone has 'the law written on their hearts' - not all pagans are serial killers. But they are offending God by misleading children and breaking his commandments, and they will inevitably face issues insoluable without the Lord and his Word.

But instead of sharing my general thoughts, let's get down to brass tacks. What does the Bible say about marriage between different religions?

Deuteronomy 7:3-4


1 Kings 11:2, 9


It may be that your own, human reason is incapable of finding why this prohibition exists - it might seem 'unfair' or 'harsh'. But it is not Man who sets the standards, makes the rules, or knows all things - it's God. And he's given us our marching orders (which are, in reality, a blessing).

Could God change the person's heart while you are seeing them?

Yes, He could. But, you're right, DANGER! What kind of power does the Christian have to date a non-Christian they are IN LOVE with?

Let me answer that: None.

The power of God is great , His will on your life should reign supreme, as, occassionally, He puts something in your path to guide you, IF you have chosen Him, but isn't the choice of which path to guide you, the way of the world or His CHOSEN way for you taken?

God provides the means, gives us grace, getting things we don't deserve, and, mercy, not getting
things (bad things!) we do deserve for our choices, these things we get (and don't get) come to us KNOWN by Grace but throught what?

Let me answer that too: faith .

So, are you boxing up God IF you don't give a guy (or gal) a chance who DANGER! is diametrically opposed to your Christian beliefs? And, who is being unsupportive though not argumentative per se is STILL unsupportive which, without support, how IF two DO become 'one'-- as Scripture states is how marriage IS--can they be one together in unity serving Christ?

 

[GreenNnice]

* What kind of power does the Christian have to CONVERT the person IN LOVE WITH, who is non-Christian, to a belief in Christianity, in Christ, God, Holy Spirit, bible-based authority and the Spirit leading, those things reigning supreme on the Christian's life?

Can God be wanting a girl who is Christian or boy who is Christian, to go OUT with a non-Christian? Can the Lord LEAD you in this way? And, remember, from the moment you saw this person, you were immediately smitten by his/her looks or mannerisms or voice or authority with words, etc. (attraction) or, their affection of appealing/relating to something like both's moms are nurses or went through cancer and died etc. You are sooo in love !

Can the Spirit lead you into this relationship by your choice, but through His power, is this kind of 'unequally yoked' dating relationship sound a bit like Russian roulette ?

 

[StephenH]

I was faced with a similar scenario that I outlined the basics of in another post. I'll do the same here.

I knew a girl online for a few years online, in fact I still do. We were pretty close. We enjoyed many of the same things and seemed pretty compatible.

The main difference was that she is a Jew and doesn't believe in Jesus or Christ. She wouldn't even hear about it. I ended up recently having to just give up on it as I found out that I couldn't have a relationship with her as she wouldn't be able to give me the spiritual and god-like support a girlfriend should be able to do. I can't say I'm very mature Christian-wise, however it just wouldn't of worked out and I'm learning to accept that and move on. She's since found someone else, and I wish them the best.

I just hope that she will find Christ one day and that I might've planted a seed of some sort.

 

[Searching4Truth]

My religious up bringing urges me to say no to this silly question. It's hard for me to keep my head level and not let my inner pharisee puff up or take over.​

 

[Gaming_Drummer]

To answer the question asked by the thread starter, unless that person was someone who was seriously close to becoming a Christian (and I mean FOR REAL), I wouldn't even date them. To me, a girl's genuine and life changing relationship with Christ is a very attractive feature. Sure, plenty of girls who are not Christians still have the essential physical and emotional attractiveness, but for me, they need to be attractive in a spiritual way as well. If a girl lacks that relationship with Christ (especially when it shows in her beliefs and lifestyle), that's a significant turnoff to me. I'm not trying to sound legalistic, but I strongly believe that a big part of keeping God first is surrounding yourself with people who will not be a bad influence on you spiritually. That includes the people you date and especially the person you marry.

 

[sanglina]

This may not sound like a model Christian marriage (and one that I am not likely to follow) but to answer the OP, yes, my older brother (just above me) married a non-christian woman and she became christian after marriage. I am also quite positive they will stay happily married till dead do them apart as they are very much in love with each other. I have also seen other christians (though very few) who married non-christians and became christians after marriage.

 

[Grace52]

I am guilty as charged, I was sooooooooo in love with him. What struck me most about "him" was he was soooo honorable. I could trust him as the day is long. While we were dating he was loving, caring, involved.....but after we married he turned into someone else. He was cold, unloving, uncaring,
It was so hard to believe that he was the same person i had dated for a year. No amount of cajoling, pleading, begging...I couldnt even get a hug out of him.(well not even holding hands, or cuddling, sitting next to me on the couch, no kissing) The only reason we had kids was because he needed to take care of his "needs". After 22 years of him letting me know that i wasnt even worth a kiss, I gave up. I left. He got the house, he got the best vehicle, he doesnt even have to pay alimony....well when he dies i get his insurance....but my health is bad after working 2 an 3 jobs at a time, I'll probably pass away before he does. So, NO, NEVER marry a unbeleiver. I think sometimes about remarrying, but i'm afraid of a repeat. Christian or not. I've seen many so called "christian men" do dastardly deeds.