I need advice bad

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Noahloveschicken

Member
#1
Mar 22, 2016
36
0
6
#1
Hi guys I am sorry for the bother I am still trying to be better spiritually and still kind of a seeker I am just so down in life but I am working on getting my life back but here is something I did and I regret it so bad it haunts me daily I have a friend I met on skype I have known a year through a game and yes I know it is through skype but I have known her for so long and I don't really have many friends in real life especially in the public school where I am at but we cant afford putting me somewhere else;/ well anyways I am so self conscious and in my mind I did not know I was going to be friends with her for so long and get so close and no not in a flirty way she is like a sister to me well I lied to her big time she wanted a picture since

I did not have a webcam at the time to get an idea of what I looked like well I sent her a fake picture well mainly to be safe and I am not going to lie I am fat I let myself go :( I did not want her to laugh and she was pretty so I did not want to be embarrassed this has been in my chest daily and I want to tell her but I am scared of losing her man I have known her for so long without her in my life God knowns where I would be she has given me advice and been there when I was down which has been a lot :( I have no idea I pray about it and I want to tell her in a way I am scared she will look at me differently and I am scared she will hurt herself and I don't want her to be sad cuz she complimented me so much and same with me doing the same to her and being for her whenever she was sad or cried or needed someone.

I really don't know what to do at this point I struggle a lot and I posted before about a porn addiction and my parents are divorcing which is another toll in my life man I feel so scummy and I know deep down I am not like this I just wish I would not have lied in the beginning and I feel so bad and I do not know how to make this up to her can you guys tell me what I should do and I am sorry for all this long stuff I typed but I posted on here many times going from addiction to divorce to self confidence issues all the way to bad spirituality I mean a lot of crap has happened in my life a lot I can not say on the post but I am here week and mild and I just need comfort at these lost times I am 17 barely and I don't know I feel like a kid I swear.

I have not been in the real world long enough I been like a hermit mostly indoors because of me hiding because of self confidence issues to looks I can not even communicate much outside of school because I am that bad I mean I am working on getting better at the self esteem issues and started going to the gym to help I literally have not looked myself in the mirror for months just please pray for me I am lacking so bad spiritually too and sorry if this is hard to read I just need comfort to bad I am always sad :((
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#2
Mar 13, 2014
41,319
16,304
113
69
Tennessee
#2
You have to be prepared for what she may now feel for you. It was not good to deceive her the way that you did, just doing that would probably hurt her more than what she may feel about your true appearance. I would just tell her that you are self-conscience about your appearance and it was wrong of you to lie. Whatever happens you should resolve to be truthful in all matters.

Pray for God to give you confidence in yourself, both inside and outside. Trust in God also that if she decides to break off with you that you will be able take this, learn from it, and move forward with your life.

I have said a prayer for your situation. Fear not, says the Lord.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#3
#3
Tell her ASAP. If you wait till a time comes where you feel pressured then she will think less of you. If you just come out and admit it on your own, apologize, well, she may still hurt and not want to talk anymore, and she'd have every right to. But she also may think we'll of you to have the guts to own up to it and not leave. You out yourself in this position, though.
If you feel you have to lie to Anyone about your appearance that is on you. And if someone else makes you feel like that, then they are not with having in your life.
Lies will Always catch up with you. If you wait till you're busted you usually come out losing. If you feed up freely at least there's a chance. But, of course, if you stop lying then it will never matter.

As as far as your size, for your health you should do something about it. Forget what anyone else thinks. Do it for YOU. For your benefit. And anyone not willing to be around you now, be glad. Because they are shallow fools and you'd be better off without them in your life.
But if you're big now, so what? Most people really don't care. It's usually a small percentage of people that will care, and those people are the kinds of people not worth impressing anyways. So confess to that pretty girl, explain your reasons to her, apologize and hope for the best. And no matter what she does, learn a lesson from it.
 
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Noahloveschicken

Member
#4
Mar 22, 2016
36
0
6
#4
Thanks so much yea I am going to have to prepare myself and of course it was wrong but I mean this was a year ago I did not think of it anyways I thought we would talk like one or twice and yea I know it was wrong I mean we are all sinners no matter what it is by grace any of us get into heaven I felt so bad like it has been hurting so deep inside like I plan on doing things abut my self confidence thanks for ur help btw Can u pray for me spiritually I am declining bad and I don't even know what to call me anymore right now I am just searching, but I hope God forgives me like I am so bad even though I been through a lto it is still no excuse I live with guilt daily
 
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Ugly

Guest
#5
#5
Noahloveschicken said:
Thanks so much yea I am going to have to prepare myself and of course it was wrong but I mean this was a year ago I did not think of it anyways I thought we would talk like one or twice and yea I know it was wrong I mean we are all sinners no matter what it is by grace any of us get into heaven I felt so bad like it has been hurting so deep inside like I plan on doing things abut my self confidence thanks for ur help btw Can u pray for me spiritually I am declining bad and I don't even know what to call me anymore right now I am just searching, but I hope God forgives me like I am so bad even though I been through a lto it is still no excuse I live with guilt daily
Click to expand...
Even separate from the sin aspect it's still wrong. Yes, we are forgiven, but morality in general will still eat our conscience.
And don't ever think your sin can overpower God's grace. Gods forgiven people who have sinned way more than you, and used them to do great things. God forgives you. Now forgive yourself.
 
4

49

Guest
#6
#6
Can understand why you sent the fake picture, and you realize it was wrong and feel bad about it. Not going to say 'The Bible says this or that', or 'Jesus would say or do this or that'. You are young, and mistakes are learning curves in life. Remember myself trying to be someone I was not because of my own self-perceived inadequacies. Reading your post, you are obviously going through a lot in your life, and this situation is probably the last thing you wanted (be it self-made or not).
Don't be so hard on yourself. You are making positive steps in working on your self esteem and your image by going to the gym (not to mention the health effects!). You know what is right and what is wrong, and seem to have a good head on your shoulders. You will be okay, and am sure you will do the right thing to bring peace of mind to yourself. If the young lady is all you seem to think she is, she will understand. Be strong!

Praying for you.
 
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Noahloveschicken

Member
#7
Mar 22, 2016
36
0
6
#7
Thanks so much! Yea I did wrong I messaged her saying I will explain something big tomorrow since she is about to sleep man this will be tough I know she will be mad she is like a sister to me man I am so sad if I lose her I will fall into a deep depression
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#8
#8
im praying for you spiritually so much. I have a son and a mothers compassion to pray for you came over me. And I will pray for her too. To not be harsh but understanding. And please know just because we are told what's attractive it isn't so for everyone. God is greater! And your right about Gods grace! We all have done things we later regret. Your very humble to confess and seek advice and prayer. God bless you.
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#9
#9
Oh and don't let the guilt eat at you. Leave it in The Lords hands. I recently found myself in what seemed an Unredeemable situation. It got ugly, but by much prayer and Gods mercy and grace it God better. Let me re state first it was by Gods mercy and grace that's why I even got to pray. Us woman sometimes get angry. But I pray for her salvation. I hope she has a soft heart for that. And it seems a blessing God let you all talk for a season. She might be angry for a while. But later she just might miss talking to you no matter what. Don't be down on your weight. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. And also remember that praying for your parents is important. I am so sorry your parents are divorcing. I pray you make some more friends and your parents truly heed God and God direct and guide and protect you and your whole family and guard your heart young man above all else for out of it are the trouble of this life. Look up the verse. Your in my prayers.
 
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Noahloveschicken

Member
#10
Mar 22, 2016
36
0
6
#10
Thank you so much! Thank you you mean a lot to me :) Yea my mom needs prayer she is feeling better because ver the summer she had 3 strokes but now she can drive a bit amen yea I have done very awful things and let myself go but I made a commitment to make a change spiritually mentally and physically: ;D Message me sometime that was one of the nicest things you would have said!
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#11
#11
I have two sons by the way. I couldn't edit that past 5mim of posting so I felt I had to correct cuz I always
love acknowledging both my gifts and blessings from God. My two sons. Amen.
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#13
#13
Prayers for your mom!! I'm just a mom&wife with a God given tender heart that God made to pray pray pray. Your in my prayers! Need advise I'll look up your threads. Is that what they are called? See I'm like an old
lady already! But my prayer for you young man is to make some real good friends your own age. Maybe an older male father type. Be careful who you put your trust in. That's why I'm praying for you! You need to guard your heart. God bless you young man.
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#14
#14
Glad you feel better! Gods going to work it out! Keep your faith! Stay humble! We ALL make tons of mistakes!!!!!
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#15
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
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#15
You need to man up and tell her the truth. If she is a true friend, she will understand and forgive you. If not, then you'll just have to deal with the consequences of what you did. People hate being lied to, Noah. It's NOT the end of the world for you, if you lose her as a friend. She could never be a better friend to you than God is. :)
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#16
#16
It's hard what your going through and confessing and seeking Godly council and prayer amidst all you are going through is pretty mature for 17 year olds these days. You do have to tell the truth. But don't forget to pray without ceasing and lift up the situation to The Lord. You already confessed your fault. Which is very mature. I know lots and lots of self proclaimed Christians that do not examine their hearts and discern their errors, they justify them. I think you weren't justifying. You were sharing why you caved and gave in to a wrong. We all have at some point in our lives. Now it's time to face the truth. But not without prayer and faith and Gods help. And your just young. don't let it make you fall into a depression. God sees your heart that you want to make things right, when you do maybe not the way you expect ad not right away but he will honor that. Because he honors a heart that repents. Remember King David. He messed up bad bad bad!!!!!! More than once! There were consequences to his actions but God never left him nor forsake him. However he had troubles in his life, but God was always his help in time of trouble. And God always exalted and blessed him for his heart being after God. May this whole ordeal draw you nearer to the lover of your soul. Our Lord Jesus Christ as He will see you through. And pray for her too. She might be unsaved.
 
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Noahloveschicken

Member
#17
Mar 22, 2016
36
0
6
#17
Yea also thanks for commenting on my posts u seem to always find me ;p It means a lot and yea this was before I commented that post I needed prayer about this was definitely before it so yea I just had this guilt in me and yea I am manning up and I am going to say it to her! If I lose her as a friend I did what is best and God knowns I am sorry this has been a year ago I mean I know I was wrong or else I would not even comment on here but I will leave it all in Gods hands
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#18
#18
Oh and don't forget all true friendships have conflicts. I've had friends that we get so angry at each other we stop talking only not too long later one of us apologizes and we miss each other. If she's a true friend she'll come back. She might be confused and angry and not know what to do for a while. But if she holds merit to your words as a person she'll be back.
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#19
Jul 3, 2015
55,978
26,108
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#19
God loves you with an everlasting undying love, He knows and understands you inside and out, everything you have ever done, He knows the reasons why, He understands better than you will ever even begin to fathom, and He has already forgiven the things that you now suffer for in your shortcomings, the failings you exhibit as a human being are shared by us as a family of people who bring our broken sorry repentant selves to the throne of God knowing that He loved us so much that He sent Jesus to die on the cross to pay our sin debt. That was such a hard thing for me to accept in my natural self, it literally took supernatural experiences to turn me from my rebellion against the God I did not know to bring me to a place where I could accept His unconditional love and total forgiveness for me. Then comes the hard part. Learning to live with myself, still a faulty human being, and learning to accept and love others where they are at in their life walk. It is not always easy but it is always worthwhile, and always the thing that makes it easier is turning to God and Jesus Christ and just trusting in them, because I made a mess of my life when I tried to do it my way, and the way the world was telling me it was okay to live. Many blessings to you and much love to you in the Name above all names! Have your friend read your opening post here if you do not know what to say to her. Nobody with a heart can read that and not be moved.
 
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AbwHJA

Guest
#20
#20
If she does ignore you and turns away from you remember The Lord has a new season for you. She was part of one season of your life. Onto the new. Trust Him!
 
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