How hard is it to find a Christian girl that's my age that's a virgin.

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eugenius

Senior Member
Jul 17, 2009
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Dothack man, I'm not actually trying to mock you or anything. I'm just trying to get you to see how silly this would sound if you actually asked a girl to get tested for STD's. I am very sure that 95% of women would drop any kind of serious intentions they had for your relationship before you said this. Especially a Christian girl. Come on man.

You know what you are saying with this? I know youre a Christian, but I don't really believe it, and still think you sleep around, and don't want to get your diseases. What a very attractive idea....

If a girl claims to be Christian she has to already think differently than most women out there and has made a decision not to have sex before marriage. So this whole question is irrelevant in the first place.

If you don't believe she is a Christian, then forget it. You have trust issues from day one. Its never going to happen. If she is a Christian and made mistakes in the past, she will tell you.
 

Nautilus

Senior Member
Jun 29, 2012
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I just met you,
And this is crazy,
But take this test before,
You STD me...
 
May 4, 2009
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You know what you are saying with this? I know youre a Christian, but I don't really believe it, and still think you sleep around, and don't want to get your diseases. What a very attractive idea....

If a girl claims to be Christian she has to already think differently than most women out there and has made a decision not to have sex before marriage. So this whole question is irrelevant in the first place.
Dude, where **edited** did you get that idea?

I was talking about if it turns that I became interested in a girl that isn't a virgin, would she get mad if I asked her to get test about the time she would become my girlfriend. So that when we get married, we wouldn't have to worry about stds.
 
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GrandOptimist

Guest
Dude, where **edited**did you get that idea?

I was talking about if it turns that I became interested in a girl that isn't a virgin, would she get mad if I asked her to get test about the time she would become my girlfriend. So that when we get married, we wouldn't have to worry about stds.
Dude. There is nobody that can answer that question except for the girl herself.
 
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Jordache

Guest
I understand the desire to have a pure companion. What we need to remember is that God see's purity in a different way than we do. We need to see purity from the eyes of God, not our eyes. To be brutally honesty, if a girl is going to compare you to a previous partner, she will be comparing you long before she gets in your pants. She's also going to be comparing you in ways far beyond what you could ever imagine, and it probably has very little to do with what you would imagine, at least initially. That comparison shows that her heart isn't completely pure. A virgin girl, no matter what age, could be just as impure as a prostitute. I have a friend. I love her dearly, but she does not have a pure heart. She was a virgin when she got married, but she was about as lustful as boundary-less teenage boy. She still is. Her heart was not pure and it had nothing to do with who she'd slept with. I have another friend who was a prostitute. This girl has been purified by the Lord and you know it when you talk her. The point is, purity isn't determined by where you've been as much as it is by what God you serve. Would you rather have a girl who saw beyond what was in your pants and valued you for the reasons God valued you? Or would like prefer a girl who's never truly been with anyone but day dreams all day long about how you compare to the guy on the True Religion bilboard?
 
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Dude, where **edited** did you get that idea?
You do know that people will think that I actually said something worse then I actually did say.

Besides, I don't like being accused of being a lier.
 

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
Jan 15, 2011
6,032
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You do know that people will think that I actually said something worse then I actually did say.

Besides, I don't like being accused of being a lier.
Dot, no one accused you of being a liar. It is obvious that the person who you made the objectionable reply to misunderstood why you were asking the question.

Maybe you should have been concerned about how the post I edited would look before you posted it. With that said, please let it go. If you have an issue with an action taken by site staff take it up with us privately.
 

onlinebuddy

Senior Member
Sep 1, 2012
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DotHackZero,
Sorry if I have repeated something that someone has already said. I did not read through all the posts as there are too many.

Our greatest example is Christ, who, despite being perfect, died for those who are not perfect, those who have sinned and those who have made mistakes.

None of us are perfect. When you marry someone, you are marrying a whole package (not just a physical body). You are marrying a soul, her past and her problems, her hurts, her mom's hurts (yes, our parents' hurts do make an impression on us) and lots more, along with all the good things she will bring into your life.

There is no perfect partner, and don't be surprised if you never get a wife with all the qualities you desire. There may not be anyone in God's storehouse who is ready-made for you. The objective of a godly man is to take an unfinished product (with all her past hurt impressions), to love her and to make her what he wants her to be and what God wants her to be.

Your promise to Christ is to present your spouse perfect to Christ, just as Christ is working on presenting his imperfect Church perfect to Himself. He is purifying her on a daily basis so that He can present the Church to Himself without spot or blemish (Ephesians 5:27).

Similarly, a godly man takes someone imperfect (as he himself is imperfect) and makes her perfect by his example in Christ. God may never give you the kind of wife you want, but He will give you the kind of wife you need. Having said that, I really wish that God blesses you with a the kind of girl you desire.
 
May 4, 2009
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Dot, no one accused you of being a liar. It is obvious that the person who you made the objectionable reply to misunderstood why you were asking the question.
eugenius has been around my posts long enough to know that I am a virgin, and that I'm waiting till I'm married for sex.
 
Sep 13, 2012
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if you are waiting until you are married before you have sex, if you are serious enough to marry someone, don't you think she is going to tell you if she has some sort of STD before you got married? give her some credit, why are you worried about it anyway, you are waiting so it's not a concern, It's your choice who you marry but you are being judgmental about someone you don't even know anything about just because she has a kid, the last time I checked, Christians weren't supposed to be judgmental, so therefor you are being a hypocrite, I'm basing that on what you have said in this thread, there may be other factors involved, but that's going by what you have posted, I wish you luck if this is your main consideration for marriage, there are many more important things in a relationship then what someone has done in the past
 
May 4, 2009
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if you are waiting until you are married before you have sex, if you are serious enough to marry someone, don't you think she is going to tell you if she has some sort of STD before you got married?
You're right I kinda forgot about that fact, but I also tend to want to get logical things in order before I decide to get serious.


Christians weren't supposed to be judgmental, so therefor you are being a hypocrite, I'm basing that on what you have said in this thread, there may be other factors involved, but that's going by what you have posted, I wish you luck if this is your main consideration for marriage, there are many more important things in a relationship then what someone has done in the past
I know that Christians have been/are stuggling with stuff like drugs,sex,porn and that's okay. I'll still love them, encourge them, show that they have been made rightous through Jesus and that they aren't condemned, be there friend(well some of this is just stuff that I want to be able to do. But I do still love them even with there past mistakes). But I just happen to be more picky when it comes to looking for a potental wife
 
Sep 13, 2012
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You're right I kinda forgot about that fact, but I also tend to want to get logical things in order before I decide to get serious.




I know that Christians have been/are stuggling with stuff like drugs,sex,porn and that's okay. I'll still love them, encourge them, show that they have been made rightous through Jesus and that they aren't condemned, be there friend(well some of this is just stuff that I want to be able to do. But I do still love them even with there past mistakes). But I just happen to be more picky when it comes to looking for a potental wife
coming from someone a lot older then you, it's not that big of a deal on whether she's a virgin or not, you are shutting out a lot of really great girls,who simply may have made a mistake in their lives, if they have turned their lives over to God, does it really mater, you are making the most important quality in your search for a future wife, something that wont even matter after you are married, look for someone who you really can get along with,that will not only be your wife, but a lifelong friend, those are the things that matter in the long term
 
May 4, 2009
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I know the logical side of me says it doesn't really matter as long she doesn't have anything, But still for some reason I do have a problem with it in a future wife.
 
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katya12

Guest
haha, yeah, everyones got a good point of veiw, and im a virgin to, but a different one. I dont think I ever should have sex cuz then I cant save the world, someone has to lol...yes theirs a logical reason behind this, if i had sex i might fall in love. get married and have kids, then wouldnt be able to do all the things i planned lol yeah i know im weird
 
Sep 13, 2012
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I know the logical side of me says it doesn't really matter as long she doesn't have anything, But still for some reason I do have a problem with it in a future wife.
just pray about it and ask God to send the person he wants you to be with into your life
 
Sep 13, 2012
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"The Terribly Sad Man"



The Terribly Sad Man


Once there was a boy who lived in a big house on a hill. He loved dogs and horses, sports cars and music. He climbed trees and went swimming, played football and admired pretty girls. Except for having to pick up after himself, he had a nice life.

One day the boy said to God, "I’ve been thinking, and I know what I want when I become a man."

"What?" asked God.

"I want to live in a big house with a porch across the front and two Saint Bernards and a garden out back. I want to marry a woman who is tall and very beautiful and kind, who has long, black hair and blue eyes, and who plays the guitar and sings in a clear, high voice.

"I want three strong sons to play football with. When they grow up, one will be a great scientist, one will be a senator and the youngest will quarterback for the 49ers.

"I want to be an adventurer who sails vast oceans and climbs tall mountains and rescues people. And I want to drive a red Ferrari and never have to pick up after myself."

"That sounds like a nice dream," said God. "I want you to be happy."

One day, playing football, the boy hurt his knee. After that he couldn’t climb tall mountains or even tall trees, much less sail vast oceans. So he studied marketing and started a medical-supplies business.

He married a girl who was very beautiful and very kind and who had long, black hair. But she was short, not tall, and had brown eyes, not blue. She couldn’t play the guitar, or even sing. But she prepared wonderful meals seasoned with rare Chinese spices and painted magnificent pictures of birds.

Because of his business, he lived in a city near the top of a tall apartment building that overlooked the blue ocean and the city’s twinkling lights. He didn’t have room for two Saint Bernards, but he had a fluffy cat.

He had three daughters, all very beautiful. The youngest, who was in a wheelchair, was the loveliest. The three daughters loved their father very much. They didn’t play football with him, but sometimes they went to the park and tossed a Fris-bee ---except for the youngest, who sat under a tree strumming her guitar and singing lovely, haunting songs.

He made enough money to live comfortably, but he didn’t drive a red Ferrari. Sometimes he had to pick up things and put them away -even things that didn’t belong to him. After all, he had three daughters.

Then one morning the man awoke and remembered his dream. "I am very sad," he said to his best friend.

"Why?" asked his friend.

"Because I once dreamed of marrying a tall women with black hair and blue eyes who would play the guitar and sing. My wife can’t play the guitar or sing.

She has brown eyes, and she’s not tall."

"Your wife is beautiful and very kind," said his friend. "She creates splendid pictures and delectable food."

But the man wasn’t listening.

"I am very sad," the man confessed to his wife one day.

"Why?" asked his wife.

"Because I once dreamed of living in a big house with a porch, and of having two Saint Bernards and a garden out back. Instead, I live in an apartment on the 47th floor."

"Our apartment is comfortable, and we can see the ocean from our couch," replied his wife. "We have love laughter and paintings of birds and a fluffy cat -not to mention three beautiful children."

But the man wasn’t listening.

"I am very sad," the man said to his therapist.

"Why?" asked the therapist.

"Because I once dreamed that I would grow up to be a great adventurer. Instead, I’m a bald businessman with a bad knee."

"The medical supplies you sell have saved many lives," said the therapist.

But the man wasn’t listening. So his therapist charged him $110 and sent him home.

"I am very sad," the man said to his accountant.

"Why?" asked the accountant.

"Because I once dreamed of driving a red Ferrari and of never having to pick up after myself. Instead, I take public transportation, and sometimes I still have to clean up."

"You wear good suits. You eat at fine restaurants, and you’ve toured Europe," said his accountant.

But the man wasn’t listening. His accountant charged him $100 anyway. He was dreaming of a red Ferrari himself.

"I am very sad," the man said to his minister.

"Why?" asked the minister.

"Because I once dreamed of having three sons; a great scientist, a politician and a quarterback. Instead, I have three daughters, and the youngest can’t even walk."

"But your daughters are beautiful and intelligent," said the minister. "They love you very much, and they’ve all done well. One is a nurse, another is an artist and the youngest teaches music to children."

But the man wasn’t listening. He was so sad that he became very sick. He lay in a white hospital room surrounded by nurses in white uniforms. Tubes and wires connected his body to blinking machines that he had once sold to the hospital.

He was terribly, tragically sad. His family, friends and minister gathered around his bed. They were all deeply sad too. Only his therapist and his accountant remained happy.

Then one night, when everyone except the nurses had gone home, the man said to God, "Remember when I was a boy and I told you all the things I wanted?"

"It was a lovely dream," said God.

"Why didn’t you give me those things?" asked the man.

"I could have," said God. "But I wanted to surprise you with things you didn’t dream of.

"I suppose you’ve noticed what I’ve given you: a kind, beautiful wife; a good business; a nice place to live; three lovely daughters -one of the best packages I’ve put together-"

"Yes," interrupted the man. "But I thought you were going to give me what I really wanted."

"And I thought you were going to give me what I really wanted," said God.

"What did you want?" asked the man. It had never occurred to him that God was in want of anything.

"I wanted to make you happy with what I’d given you," said God.

The man lay in the dark all night, thinking. Finally he decided to dream a new dream, one he wished he’d dreamed years before. He decided to dream that what he wanted most were the very things he already had.

And the man got well and lived happily on the 47th floor, enjoying his children’s beautiful voices, his wife’s deep brown eyes and her glorious paintings of birds. And at night he gazed at the ocean and contentedly watched the lights of the city twinkling on, one by one.
 
Sep 13, 2012
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do you see my point? you are so focused on one thing, that you might miss what God has for you, there might be a beautiful girl out there with Children who desperately need a daddy and are just waiting for someone who will care about them, dont overlook what God may give you
 
K

keep_on_smiling

Guest
Thinking about this question again, I came to the conclusion that it shouldn't matter how hard it is to find it. If it's something that means so much to you then you will find her, but it will take time. If you are impatient about it, then you should try to be happy alone or ask God to show you what He wants for you. Your heart may change.
 
Jan 13, 2007
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I Love you not because of who you are, but becasue of who I am when I am with you.. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they dont love you with all they have... A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you cant have them... Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.. Don't waste your time on someone, who isn't willing to waste their time on you... Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people befor metting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.. Don't cry because it is over, smile becasue it happend... There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.. Make yourself a better person and know who you are befor you try and know someone else and expect them to know you... Dont try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.... REMEMBER WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON!!!!!!
 
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phiiopz13

Guest
I see you are 23. At that age, I would imagine it's rather difficult to find a young woman, even a Christian one, who hasn't gone further than what you've said. The world has so influenced the church, and the church has been lax in responding.

It is good to be wise about who you choose. I don't blame you at all for not wanting to date someone who has a child. That's a kind of stress that I don't think I could handle. Just be careful you aren't holding their past against them if they've repented of their old, immoral ways. There is no condemnation from God for those who are in Christ, and neither should they receive condemnation from fellow believers.[/QUOTE}t

"if you want to find a girl who still keep her virginity until marriage, you should look from her friends and surrounding first. Friends have great impact. For example, me and 9 of my friends committed not to do sex before marriage and we even committed not to have a boyfriend until the age of 25 when we can independently earn money and take care of ourselves. We're now still in the age of 17-18 and yes we haven't been in any relationships before :) we focus on our study and career first than spending time in temporary relationships with wrong guys"

 
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