Deal Breakers, Red Flags, Must Haves and the Wish List.

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
S

SabbieWabbie

Guest
#41
Imagine God made lists about who he wanted and didn't want. On some level, we play God by putting something like marriage into our own hands, marriage is not about US, it's an institution meant for glorifying God.

Just pray about your partner and let God sort out the list because honestly, God knows what's best for you better than you know what's best for you.
 

lil_christian

Senior Member
Mar 14, 2010
7,489
73
48
27
#42
It's funny, but I was just thinking the other day how that could be used for God. If I had an orphanage, I would love to find one of those extreme couponers willing to donate their time to multiply my funds for the good of the orphans.

However, I do know what you mean. If your garage is packed with 50,000 boxes of cherry Jell-o and you buy more because you have a coupon, the red flag comes out.
See, that's a noble cause, and if God called someone to do that, that is fine.


End of the world prep isn't noble at all. lol
 
D

DarlinNadia

Guest
#43
You re-wrote your post and you explained yourself much better the second time around. Now that we know a little better where you are coming from, you don't seem so judgmental. I'm glad you are able to see the way God has grown you through your life experiences, but don't expect me to say that just because God used crap for good, that makes it no longer crap.

I forget that people on the forums do not "know" me. I can come off as being very badly without it being my intention. I look forward to Iron sharpening Iron.. because Cinder, not a lot of people are bold enough or even care enough to let me know when I lack that tact and diplomacy. I know I do and often times people know me well enough they just let me slide with it. I'm thankful you are you. :) May God Bless you and keep you close.
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,328
2,361
113
#44
I forget that people on the forums do not "know" me. I can come off as being very badly without it being my intention. I look forward to Iron sharpening Iron.. because Cinder, not a lot of people are bold enough or even care enough to let me know when I lack that tact and diplomacy. I know I do and often times people know me well enough they just let me slide with it. I'm thankful you are you. :) May God Bless you and keep you close.
When iron sharpens iron sparks fly. We'll just have to continue to be good about making sure we don't let them cause fires. And when I get frustrated and throw tact out the window, please return the favor ;)
 
D

DarlinNadia

Guest
#45
Imagine God made lists about who he wanted and didn't want. On some level, we play God by putting something like marriage into our own hands, marriage is not about US, it's an institution meant for glorifying God.

Just pray about your partner and let God sort out the list because honestly, God knows what's best for you better than you know what's best for you.
Multi-quote tiffany multiquote.. sheesh

SabbieWabbie, I've been reproved by GOD himself for trying to tell him what I am supposed to be in HIS Kingdom.. It didn't end well. Fighting with God, Arguing with God, TELLING God, never ends well for me. I've said before.. But God.. (most dangerous two words ever) I think I should serve you better as a Beautiful Vase.. I can be this glorious shiny pretty thing for all to see. and God's like . Yeah. No. You will be a toilet seat... and remember... CLAY does not Speak... where do YOU get off telling the Potter what you will become.. When Did YOU last create a universe? Go re-read Job... when you get done with that Little Miss THINK YOU KNOW BETTER Than me.. .read Jonah... and then Hosea and then... skip your Happy little obedient self over to Jeremiah and then sit in Lamentations for awhile.. then.. just then come tell me what YOU will be... silly girl. Step off. and step and learn your place in this kingdom.. Who do you serve? you can't serve yourself and Me.. so get your ducks in a row before you dare come at me like that again. then it's like WHOOSH CRACK SLAP DOWN and i'm back quiet. I've had some very big arguments with God.. shouting and telling him what I thought .. this is likely why i've been through so much crap.. God didn't pile it on me.. My pride piled it on me.. trying to self-correct rather than accepting forgiveness.

I would be horrified if someone came up to me and told me I met the criteria on their list... because lightening will strike very near me.. and I want no part of that lol.

When iron sharpens iron sparks fly. We'll just have to continue to be good about making sure we don't let them cause fires. And when I get frustrated and throw tact out the window, please return the favor


I know a guy that can make a flood to put out the sparks. I have had companies send me off to tact and diplomacy seminars. I just lack that warm and fuzzy.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
U

Ugly

Guest
#46
This thread is funny. Some people are answering the idea of the post. And others are criticizing other people for their posts. Isn't this entire concept subjective? Some people will have big lists, some people will have small and some will pretend to have no list. Who really cares if you disagree with someone else's list? It's Their list for Their standards. You don't have to agree with it. If you think their list is too big, too detailed or whatever, so what? Again, it's their choice. Only reason i can see to be bothered by it is you like them and are blocked by things on their list. Otherwise why are you arguing with someones subjective ideas?
 

Liamson

Senior Member
Feb 3, 2010
3,078
69
48
#48
My list is mostly from experience.

I took a girl hiking one time, she talked about how her father used to take her camping, so I was optimistic. We found a cool lake, some Carrots, berries, etc. THEN she had to pee, but she had never peed outside before. She was hoping there was going to be an outhouse or something I guess. We were more than a few leagues from the nearest facilities, but after suffering for about an hour, she wants to try.

So I scouted a very appropriate looking log, explained the 3 seashells, and marched about 50 yards away so she could do her thing. After about 30 minutes she comes out of the woods, wearing the shorts that she packed in her bag, crying. Apparently something terrible happened and her dad wanted to kill me when we I dropped her off.

I don't mind SOME* Crunchy, Granola, Organic things but, when it becomes a sort of philosophy about life, overriding fun, efficiency, adventure, budgets and common sense, it winds up on the list. A lot of women consider themselves Crunchy but, when a girl wants to be in a relationship with me for the purpose of living off the grid, so she can make her organic soap business that smells like cat pee and patchouli, Crunchy becomes a red flag. Granola is just a gateway food.

Also I dated a girl for about two weeks, which mostly occurred in my territory for the first week but I came over for lunch and her whole world was covered in horse paraphernalia. We took a drive and she wanted me to pull over so she could "Free" some skinny horses, by tearing down their fence or something. She cried and wouldn't talk to me for the rest of the day. The next day, I came over and brought a movie, but she was cold and distant, still hung up about those horses.

Frankly, its not just horses, its all the Boundary Creatures: Dolphins, Unicorns, Horses, Dragons, etc. I don't get it, and its definitely a flag.



Thats how things get on the List.

Positives too.

I've been in 2.5 relationships where they loved running with me, and I loved working out with them. I didn't even know I wanted that until I had it.

Relationships where they drive the wheels off of whatever they get their hands on. Fantastic.

Relationships where they love to sing and write the most challenging and soulful things.

These aren't needs but, the wish list grows with each thing I run into that blows my mind.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
838
113
#50
Leaning on your own understanding would be a deal breaker for me.
What is "leaning on your own understanding"?

How is Liamson doing this and not using his God-given sense of wisdom?
 

just_monicat

Senior Member
Jan 1, 2014
1,284
17
0
#51
My list is mostly from experience.

I took a girl hiking one time, she talked about how her father used to take her camping, so I was optimistic. We found a cool lake, some Carrots, berries, etc. THEN she had to pee, but she had never peed outside before. She was hoping there was going to be an outhouse or something I guess. We were more than a few leagues from the nearest facilities, but after suffering for about an hour, she wants to try.

So I scouted a very appropriate looking log, explained the 3 seashells, and marched about 50 yards away so she could do her thing. After about 30 minutes she comes out of the woods, wearing the shorts that she packed in her bag, crying. Apparently something terrible happened and her dad wanted to kill me when we I dropped her off.

I don't mind SOME* Crunchy, Granola, Organic things but, when it becomes a sort of philosophy about life, overriding fun, efficiency, adventure, budgets and common sense, it winds up on the list. A lot of women consider themselves Crunchy but, when a girl wants to be in a relationship with me for the purpose of living off the grid, so she can make her organic soap business that smells like cat pee and patchouli, Crunchy becomes a red flag. Granola is just a gateway food.

Also I dated a girl for about two weeks, which mostly occurred in my territory for the first week but I came over for lunch and her whole world was covered in horse paraphernalia. We took a drive and she wanted me to pull over so she could "Free" some skinny horses, by tearing down their fence or something. She cried and wouldn't talk to me for the rest of the day. The next day, I came over and brought a movie, but she was cold and distant, still hung up about those horses.

Frankly, its not just horses, its all the Boundary Creatures: Dolphins, Unicorns, Horses, Dragons, etc. I don't get it, and its definitely a flag.
after reading this, i would *love* to meet these women.

seriously? freeing horses and can't pee outside? really?

and seeing all the crap you've gotten for your list, i'm almost afraid to post mine. *ducks*
 
D

Donkeyfish07

Guest
#52
after reading this, i would *love* to meet these women.

seriously? freeing horses and can't pee outside? really?

and seeing all the crap you've gotten for your list, i'm almost afraid to post mine. *ducks*
I went to school with a super emotional girl like that. She cried because she seen a dolphin on TV, but only because she was happy to see a Dolphin. Really empathetic woman. I can kinda sympathize with people like the lady Liamson described, because I'm the type of person that hates to see a dog living it's entire life on a chain and things of that nature.....but I don't go so far as to go letting peoples dog's loose. That is overboard by anyone's standards, lol....but I understand the feeling that motivates people like that.

I've never met a girl that can't pee outside though, where I come from.....it's a necessary survival skill. Everyone has been to a bonfire in the middle of nowhere, you have to learn young around here :p
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#53
Imagine God made lists about who he wanted and didn't want. On some level, we play God by putting something like marriage into our own hands, marriage is not about US, it's an institution meant for glorifying God.

Just pray about your partner and let God sort out the list because honestly, God knows what's best for you better than you know what's best for you.
Wow I'm speechless because you put into words the exact same view that I have about marriage and finding a partner. :rolleyes:
 
Last edited:
D

DarlinNadia

Guest
#54
What is "leaning on your own understanding"?

How is Liamson doing this and not using his God-given sense of wisdom?
Proverbs 3:5Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding
 
L

LT

Guest
#55
red flags: overconfidence, no confidence, over emotional, no emotions.
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,328
2,361
113
#56
I don't go so far as to go letting peoples dog's loose.
I had a job measuring houses and I almost did this once (did get my boss to call the right people about animal cruelty). There were a bunch of puppies crammed in a cage and I think honestly that if I hadn't had to leave the paper saying I'd been at their house I would have freed those puppies.


Anyway, ladies you can stop making lists because I've found the perfect man and for a limited time only I can clone him and offer him to you too. Here he is
Santa%u00252Bparade%2B504.jpg
 
A

akrick

Guest
#57
Way back in survival training during the group portion we had a girl from the city who would not drink water because she knew that it would make her "go" and she had never "gone" in the woods before and she did not want to start. We tried and tried to get her to drink water but she refused.

On the third day we had to medevac her out because of dehydration. :confused:

I've never met a girl that can't pee outside though, where I come from.....it's a necessary survival skill. Everyone has been to a bonfire in the middle of nowhere, you have to learn young around here :p
 
D

DarlinNadia

Guest
#59
I know the quote. I want to know what you think it means and why Liamson is violating it.
At what point did I direct my comment at Liamson? I appreciate you teaching me the word decry.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
838
113
#60
At what point did I direct my comment at Liamson? I appreciate you teaching me the word decry.
Decry=publicly denounce.

Given that was your first response to the Original Post, I took your comment as a sweeping criticism of Liamson's redflags.

If I was wrong in this, then I was wrong in my criticism and apologize.