"Not necessary, really..."
I made that post for a reason.
Sometimes I make posts like that one just to make a point.
Often, it seems, on CC -- I am not afforded the same courtesy as everyone else - of having my own opinion. I get slammed for speaking any-bit-of-truth that I may happen to express...
(
"Don't worry - I can handle it - I don't loose any sleep over it. Besides, it happens often enough that I am 'used to it'..." )
By making this statement, it is not my intention to whine; rather, I am only stating an observation...
It is really easy for people to "read into" posts things the author did not say - and certainly, did not intend to say.
In this particular case, the question being asked - that I answered - is
very specific:
"baked goods" versus "slim wife" : What is your preference?
I did not say,
by any stretch of imagination, that I would love my wife less if she baked cookies and, as a consequence, she were 15 pounds heavier. Yet -
"I promise you" - there are some folks on CC - men and women - whose
imaginations "no-doubt" immediately - upon reading my post - "conjured up" some really twisted
assumptions about me, my attitude toward women, etc. -
based on their own suppositions drawn from things I did not actually say [ in the slightest ] - that-are-nothing-even-remotely-close-to-the-truth.
The question was one of
preference. Am I not allowed to have a preference?
Is there only one [ politically ] correct answer to the question [ that is allowed ]?
Also - 'preference' does not mean "absolute requirement" either. Yet -
I'm pretty sure that that idea entered several people's minds when they read it.
Things about me that might be helpful to know:
~ I am not a legalist.
~ I am not 'politically correct'.
~ I am a 'deep thinker'.
~ I am
very detail-oriented.
I can give very detailed specific answers to very detailed specific questions. And -- 99% of the time ( it seems ), others will "assume" things that I did not actually say...
So, I "try to do my best" to do what I can to minimize this effect...
A big part of the reason why I utilize various text attributes ( font, color, bold, italics, etc. ) the way I do is to try to more effectively communicate to others the "sense and tense" of what I am trying to say - with [ various forms of ] emphasis to express what is missing in this environment - the subtle "clues" of body language, etc. If you read enough of my posts, you should see a pattern develop...
I have tried to create a consistant 'style' that others may be able to recognize and more efficiently interpret. If you see
big fonts in my posts -- it is very highly probable that it is simply-and-only for emphasis. I am not yelling. I am not angry. It is
exceedingly rare that
any anger is involved in my writing of posts. Why? Well --- first of all -- I do not easily take offense to [ what amounts to ] "someone elses opinion" -- no matter what kind of self-proclaimed [ whatever ] they might indicate that they are, or make themselves out to be - it is only "someone elses opinion" to me. Now - don't misunderstand what I am saying here. I am not saying that I do not value other's opinions. What I mean by this is that I "maintain a reasonable level of expectation" with regard to what other people post on CC. I am mature enough (
and detail-oriented enough ) to "look past" the [ anger, etc. ] in other people's posts - so as to be able to see what they are actually trying to say. Without reacting to the 'emotion' content, I can focus more on the 'data' content. In other words, I can usually separate the 'data' in a post from the 'attitude' / 'emotion' / etc. that is sometimes attached to the post - because of the emotionally-charged-state-of-mind of the person when they wrote it. I have actually seen people on CC get into "a very 'active' exchange of words"
over some issue / topic - when, in actuality, they essentially agreed with each other... Why? Because, they were paying more attention and interest in the 'emotional' content - rather than the 'data' content - of other's post(s).
( The PRIDE that can be found on CC is enormous. Everyone is too busy "playing their tape" to have any real discussions about anything. ( Of course, this statement is mostly referring to "conversations held" in the Bible Discussion Forum... ) )
Also, I try to "think through" what I want to say before / while I am writing a post. Sometimes, this contributes to the long time it takes me to write some posts. I try very hard to "articulate correctly" what it is that I want to get across.
( And, I try to apply
James 1:19 to my post-writing. )
~ I am not perfect.
~ I do not think that I "know it all" or "have it all figured out"; I know what I believe, and am not afraid to express it.
~ I fully respect the right of everyone else to have their own opinion about [ whatever ] -- and, I do not 'slam' anyone simply for having an opinion that is different than mine.
~ I am an honest, decent, respectable, well-intentioned, was-even-raised-to-have-good-manners kind of guy.
Many of you would be "totally astounded and amazed" at just how much 'respect' I actually have for women-in-general, womanhood, motherhood, pregnant women,
... ( a special 'regard' for women - to look after them and protect them - of whatever age - when in close proximity - whether I have ever-in-my-life met them before or not --
"just an 'automatic' tendency that is based on how I was 'raised'..." )
Based on how I was raised --
it is a shame and a dishonor to abuse a female of any age.
I have never purposely used, abused, hurt, injured, or hit a female ever-in-my-entire-life.
Again - I am not perfect; however, the intentions of my heart are sincere and honest.
~ Despite the fact that some refuse to believe it -- I do not "look down my nose" at anyone on here -- nor have I ever "talked down" to anyone on here.
"For the absolute most part, I like all of you just fine..."
And -
"you can rest assured" that - if I happen to call you 'honey' or 'dear' or etc. -- there
is [ at least ]
some real, honest, sincere, affection behind it. I
never use this kind of term-of-affection in a negative way ( with a negative
attitude or
intent attached to it ). It is my way of showing you that
"I am one who cares"...
( And, of course - "because I care" - I will happily not do such as that if you are not comfortable with it -
and / if - I am aware of that fact. Just keep in mind -- the effectual outcome of your personal opinion and associated comfort-level does not constitute a valid judgment to be placed on all women -- some of whom may actually enjoy the affection given - not believing that there is anything wrong with "honest innocent affection from a brother"... )
Guys -
"you can rest assured" that - I will
not call you 'honey' or 'dear' or etc...
Yes -- my personality, sense of humor, etc. - is "a little different" from "the average guy";however...
"I am not the Ogre that some folks seem to think that I am."
To borrow the saying that mailmandan currently has in his signature:
I'm not a bad guy. I'm just misunderstood.