Porn and What is Happening with Teens Today!

[Angela53510]

I found this very pointed article. I am posting it here, rather than the teen forum, because if even half of what the article says is true, they already know all about this!

I was shocked, but in some ways not surprised, considering the number of posts here on porn and the destructive influence on people's lives.

I pray that anyone into porn will read this article, even if you are 90, and consider the effect that porn is having on you, and the absolute need to quit! Please don't say because you are old, this doesn't apply to you. The very fact that you are using porn is proof that you do NOT know about healthy relationships, regardless of how alone or rejected you might feel. There is NEVER an excuse for using porn!

"Fight the New Drug is all about pro-love and pro-healthy sexuality. That is why we are anti-porn. Porn is full of ideals and beliefs that are completely opposite of what real relationships, real sex, and real love are like. Healthy relationships are built on equality, honesty, respect, and love. But in porn, it’s the reverse; interactions are based on domination, disrespect, abuse, violence, and detachment. Our generation is the first to deal with the issue of pornography to this intensity and scale. And, as we’ve seen with today’s society, if we don’t take a stand, the problem is only going to get worse and worse. By being informed and understanding porn’s harmful effects, we can make a much needed change to our perceptions about love, sex, and relationships."


Having big issues with the link, and deleting my final words. Please put fightthenewdrug and sex before kissing into a browser to read the full article!

 

[PennEd]

As destructive as it is now, I don't think we have scratched the surface with how bad it's going to be with virtual reality and robotic sex before the turn of the decade.

 

[Willie-T]

I wish any of these "articles" would talk about answers.

 

[eph610]

I found this very pointed article. I am posting it here, rather than the teen forum, because if even half of what the article says is true, they already know all about this!

I was shocked, but in some ways not surprised, considering the number of posts here on porn and the destructive influence on people's lives.

I pray that anyone into porn will read this article, even if you are 90, and consider the effect that porn is having on you, and the absolute need to quit! Please don't say because you are old, this doesn't apply to you. The very fact that you are using porn is proof that you do NOT know about healthy relationships, regardless of how alone or rejected you might feel. There is NEVER an excuse for using porn!

"Fight the New Drug is all about pro-love and pro-healthy sexuality. That is why we are anti-porn. Porn is full of ideals and beliefs that are completely opposite of what real relationships, real sex, and real love are like. Healthy relationships are built on equality, honesty, respect, and love. But in porn, it’s the reverse; interactions are based on domination, disrespect, abuse, violence, and detachment. Our generation is the first to deal with the issue of pornography to this intensity and scale. And, as we’ve seen with today’s society, if we don’t take a stand, the problem is only going to get worse and worse. By being informed and understanding porn’s harmful effects, we can make a much needed change to our perceptions about love, sex, and relationships."


Having big issues with the link, and deleting my final words. Please put fightthenewdrug and sex before kissing into a browser to read the full article!

The other shoe that dropped on this is that porn addiction among women is now at an all time high....We wont go into how bad porn addiction is for men and women in the church and among ministers.

 

[Deidre]

I've known a few guys who struggled with porn, and they'd say how easy it is to view it online. There are many sites that are free to look at, and they became addicted to it over time. Even when they had girlfriends who loved them, they were addicted to porn. I read an article that they've done studies on people who view porn, that their brain patterns and areas that are ''lighting'' up in tests, are similar to that of someone high on a narcotic. It actually physically changes something in one's brain, when someone is addicted and viewing porn. So, it's not just as easy as simply quitting and never looking back, for some people. Even Christians struggle with it, but Jesus said to take up your cross and follow Me, and that would be a cross that some have, for sure.

Like anything, it's easy to escape into something and have it rule over you. None of us are immune to addictions, while porn isn't something I may struggle with, I have different struggles. Over spending. Or pride. Or a number of things that I need to view as crosses and follow Jesus.

Anyone ever watch Fireproof, that movie? That is a good film that touches upon porn use of a husband, and how it affects his wife. How she sees it as a betrayal, and how he doesn't understand why she sees it like that at first, but when He gives his life to Christ, he saw how much his porn use hurt her and the marriage. There's more to the movie than that, but that is one aspect that was ruining their marriage.

We live in a culture that tells us ''if it makes you happy, who cares what others think,'' and it's completely counter to a life in Christ. So, it's not only something that people struggle with on a personal level, but society struggles with messages that lead it astray every single day.

 

[Willie-T]

I've known a few guys who struggled with porn, and they'd say how easy it is to view it online. There are many sites that are free to look at, and they became addicted to it over time. Even when they had girlfriends who loved them, they were addicted to porn. I read an article that they've done studies on people who view porn, that their brain patterns and areas that are ''lighting'' up in tests, are similar to that of someone high on a narcotic. It actually physically changes something in one's brain, when someone is addicted and viewing porn. So, it's not just as easy as simply quitting and never looking back, for some people. Even Christians struggle with it, but Jesus said to take up your cross and follow Me, and that would be a cross that some have, for sure.

Like anything, it's easy to escape into something and have it rule over you. None of us are immune to addictions, while porn isn't something I may struggle with, I have different struggles. Over spending. Or pride. Or a number of things that I need to view as crosses and follow Jesus.

Anyone ever watch Fireproof, that movie? That is a good film that touches upon porn use of a husband, and how it affects his wife. How she sees it as a betrayal, and how he doesn't understand why she sees it like that at first, but when He gives his life to Christ, he saw how much his porn use hurt her and the marriage. There's more to the movie than that, but that is one aspect that was ruining their marriage.

We live in a culture that tells us ''if it makes you happy, who cares what others think,'' and it's completely counter to a life in Christ. So, it's not only something that people struggle with on a personal level, but society struggles with messages that lead it astray every single day.

And, you were going to continue on into talking about answers by saying.............. what?

 

[Willie-T]

Most of this rhetoric is akin to saying it's not a good thing to shoot yourself in the head with a pistol. We all kind of catch on to that. But what do we do with the guy or gal who thinks that is the answer to whatever they are facing?

 

[Miri]

Porn seems to be the new opium of the masses.

When I was young it was glue sniffing and lighter fuel sniffing that was all the rage.
Then there was the flower power era, hippie ya man, pot etc
Then moving onto harder drugs.
Now it seems to be porn.

If anything all this teaches is that whatever each generation considers to be the
"in thing" it doesn't work, the effects do not bring lasting peace or escapism.

For many I think it's the escapism element (the fantasy role play) which is the driving force.
Some use porn others turn to on online games and emerge themselves for hours on end in
a fantasy world.

Maybe the bigger question is why do people feel the need to use distractions and fantasy to
escape the real world.

 

[Angela53510]

Willie, when I was in seminary, we took a big unit on dealing with pornography as part of our "Pastoral Ministeries." That's right, it was to future pastors as a warning not to start in the first place. We also had one classmate who had been addicted to porn and he talk about how he got free. Although he mostly talked about an accountabilty partner, perhaps not the threat of expulsion? He did have a heart for God, and knew it was bad, especially being married with small children.


So I'm just throwing out a few ideas here!

1. Don't start in the first place (simplistic, I know!) I think that is what the article is calling for. Too bad the link wouldn't work.

2. Accountablity, accountablity, accountability! That means exposing the darkness. So some people, like Deirdre said above, don't seem the harm in what they are doing. Especially the young and naive! Or the easily pressured by the peers!

But accountability means finding support. A mentor is invaluable. Sort of like someone in AA has someone to call, if they get the urge to drink they can call their mentor, who will support and encourage them for taking this vital step of admitting what they have done.

I have never had an issue with porn, nor my husband. But as Deirdre said, I do have other issues. God kindly placed my husband in my life, who thoughtfully loves to point out when I am not acting as Scripture would have me do, in my weak areas. OK, he is more calling me out, but hey, it seems to have worked in some things!

I know there are major US denominations who have set up websites to deal with pastors who are struggling with this addiction. But this kind of thing needs to be implimented on a much larger level. The general public needs to be able to access sites that will encourage them, and help them break free.

3. What about making porn on the internet illegal? I know people will still find ways around it, but at least maybe it won't be so overt. Even making pop up windows for porn illegal would help. That is a door for a lot of pastors sitting alone in their offices studying for sermons, and this opens up a whole "new" world for them. Right now, there is nothing against an autoparts store being paid to allow a pop up porn window on their site. This happened to my husband, and he got me, and then deleted the whole website and blocked it. But most people do not have the wisdom to do this.

Porn is something that used to be done in secret. I think in some cases it still is. But it is worrisome in terms of the way youth and young people glorify it to each other.

4. Maybe just calling it "wrong" is a start. No need to moralize! Just show the damage it does to the brain and relationships! There will always be those who don't care, but maybe a warning, making it illegal, might help?

Don't hesitate to add your suggestions on how to stop this epidemic Willie. At least I am sure you won't post that the end is near, so no need to be concerned.

 

[Willie-T]

Willie, when I was in seminary, we took a big unit on dealing with pornography as part of our "Pastoral Ministeries." That's right, it was to future pastors as a warning not to start in the first place. We also had one classmate who had been addicted to porn and he talk about how he got free. Although he mostly talked about an accountabilty partner, perhaps not the threat of expulsion? He did have a heart for God, and knew it was bad, especially being married with small children.


So I'm just throwing out a few ideas here!

1. Don't start in the first place (simplistic, I know!) I think that is what the article is calling for. Too bad the link wouldn't work.

2. Accountablity, accountablity, accountability! That means exposing the darkness. So some people, like Deirdre said above, don't seem the harm in what they are doing. Especially the young and naive! Or the easily pressured by the peers!

But accountability means finding support. A mentor is invaluable. Sort of like someone in AA has someone to call, if they get the urge to drink they can call their mentor, who will support and encourage them for taking this vital step of admitting what they have done.

I have never had an issue with porn, nor my husband. But as Deirdre said, I do have other issues. God kindly placed my husband in my life, who thoughtfully loves to point out when I am not acting as Scripture would have me do, in my weak areas. OK, he is more calling me out, but hey, it seems to have worked in some things!

I know there are major US denominations who have set up websites to deal with pastors who are struggling with this addiction. But this kind of thing needs to be implimented on a much larger level. The general public needs to be able to access sites that will encourage them, and help them break free.

3. What about making porn on the internet illegal? I know people will still find ways around it, but at least maybe it won't be so overt. Even making pop up windows for porn illegal would help. That is a door for a lot of pastors sitting alone in their offices studying for sermons, and this opens up a whole "new" world for them. Right now, there is nothing against an autoparts store being paid to allow a pop up porn window on their site. This happened to my husband, and he got me, and then deleted the whole website and blocked it. But most people do not have the wisdom to do this.

Porn is something that used to be done in secret. I think in some cases it still is. But it is worrisome in terms of the way youth and young people glorify it to each other.

4. Maybe just calling it "wrong" is a start. No need to moralize! Just show the damage it does to the brain and relationships! There will always be those who don't care, but maybe a warning, making it illegal, might help?

Don't hesitate to add your suggestions on how to stop this epidemic Willie. At least I am sure you won't post that the end is near, so no need to be concerned.

I'm assuming you have not seen my almost incessant and obnoxiously shameless promotion of one particular book?

This is a field of work I was recruited into more than thirty years ago by a psychologist I used to work for. I didn't want to do it, but I finally agreed. And in the 24 years that I consistently labored to help people, both male & female, from 13 year old kids to 80 year-old grandfathers overcome a myriad of sexual problems, I employed at least a dozen of the very latest "programs", techniques, and methods. In all honesty, this one single book is the only thing in all those years that I have found that I think will be effective for at least 90% of the people who put it into practice... and maybe even more than that.

There is no point in going into any of the content of the book here on the forum, because I would be typing for half the night to even scratch the surface... and hardly anyone would read it anyway.

I have told many people about the book, and a few have spent the whopping sum of $10 to buy an e-book copy. I do wish, if any of them are reading this, they would give their assessment of that book. But, THAT is my answer to something that truly seems to work.

 

[Monnkai]

As destructive as it is now, I don't think we have scratched the surface with how bad it's going to be with virtual reality and robotic sex before the turn of the decade.

It's all happening in Japan a friend showed me an article on it and I won't go into detail. Fighting with a 14+ year addiction myself I can honestly say its getting worse for everyone.

 

[Willie-T]

I notice now, that you asked about how to stop the epidemic. In my opinion, it can't be done. God is able to, but I don't think He will. This is too big and WAY too lucrative to think we can enact any "Laws" that won't just be brushed aside. We will simply end up doing what we are now doing to the drug problem, and that is over-harshly punishing the end-users while the big fish buy their freedom and keep right on producing the filth.

 

[Monnkai]

I notice now, that you asked about how to stop the epidemic. In my opinion, it can't be done. God is able to, but I don't think He will. This is too big and WAY too lucrative to think we can enact any "Laws" that won't just be brushed aside. We will simply end up doing what we are now doing to the drug problem, and that is over-harshly punishing the end-users while the big fish buy their freedom and keep right on producing the filth.

I agree at the rate its growing the only thing that would stop it is Judgement day. That may be far off or really close depending on who you ask. I'm certainly not saying give up but our only hope is to preach Christ.

 

[eph610]

I notice now, that you asked about how to stop the epidemic. In my opinion, it can't be done. God is able to, but I don't think He will. This is too big and WAY too lucrative to think we can enact any "Laws" that won't just be brushed aside. We will simply end up doing what we are now doing to the drug problem, and that is over-harshly punishing the end-users while the big fish buy their freedom and keep right on producing the filth.

True, or like marijuana we will see legalization of prostitution, which will include same sex or hetero to start.

NAMBLA is attempting to get the age of consent lowered to 15 in certain states, mainly in Denver....which was also the first to allow legal rec use of POT....

This is why when date setters and end time sign watchers say the end is near I have to laugh....America has no idea whats coming to the surface.....that has been here all along.

 

[Willie-T]

I agree at the rate its growing the only thing that would stop it is Judgement day. That may be far off or really close depending on who you ask. I'm certainly not saying give up but our only hope is to preach Christ.

No, we don't give up. But we work where we can be effective....... And that is getting people back out of the bondage.

I can't say it any more emphatically, THIS BOOK WORKS..... if you will also do the work called for in EYES OF HONOR.

 

[Believer1987]

I hesitate to reply on this thread, because I am addicted to internet porn. However, maybe the thread can help me and possibly my response can shed some light for everyone else here.
1. It can't be any easier to get. Anyone of any age can get it. Your cell doesn't know how old you are and can't stop you when you tell it you're 18.
2. The mindset is it's just a thrill. It's difficult to imagine how it hurts anyone else. Everyone there looks like they're enjoying it.
3. You cannot ban something from the Internet. First, it will only make it more desirable, second, there are always back doors.
I'm not trying to justify it. I want to walk away, but it is like a drug. I don't know the science behind it, but I can feel my mind and body drawn to it. I've been in church for years and have heard all the reasons why to walk, but it's a daily struggle.

 

[Willie-T]

I hesitate to reply on this thread, because I am addicted to internet porn. However, maybe the thread can help me and possibly my response can shed some light for everyone else here.
1. It can't be any easier to get. Anyone of any age can get it. Your cell doesn't know how old you are and can't stop you when you tell it you're 18.
2. The mindset is it's just a thrill. It's difficult to imagine how it hurts anyone else. Everyone there looks like they're enjoying it.
3. You cannot ban something from the Internet. First, it will only make it more desirable, second, there are always back doors.
I'm not trying to justify it. I want to walk away, but it is like a drug. I don't know the science behind it, but I can feel my mind and body drawn to it. I've been in church for years and have heard all the reasons why to walk, but it's a daily struggle.

BUY THE BOOK.

 

[Corbinscam]

Willie, when I was in seminary, we took a big unit on dealing with pornography as part of our "Pastoral Ministeries." That's right, it was to future pastors as a warning not to start in the first place. We also had one classmate who had been addicted to porn and he talk about how he got free. Although he mostly talked about an accountabilty partner, perhaps not the threat of expulsion? He did have a heart for God, and knew it was bad, especially being married with small children.


So I'm just throwing out a few ideas here!

1. Don't start in the first place (simplistic, I know!) I think that is what the article is calling for. Too bad the link wouldn't work.

2. Accountablity, accountablity, accountability! That means exposing the darkness. So some people, like Deirdre said above, don't seem the harm in what they are doing. Especially the young and naive! Or the easily pressured by the peers!

But accountability means finding support. A mentor is invaluable. Sort of like someone in AA has someone to call, if they get the urge to drink they can call their mentor, who will support and encourage them for taking this vital step of admitting what they have done.

I have never had an issue with porn, nor my husband. But as Deirdre said, I do have other issues. God kindly placed my husband in my life, who thoughtfully loves to point out when I am not acting as Scripture would have me do, in my weak areas. OK, he is more calling me out, but hey, it seems to have worked in some things!

I know there are major US denominations who have set up websites to deal with pastors who are struggling with this addiction. But this kind of thing needs to be implimented on a much larger level. The general public needs to be able to access sites that will encourage them, and help them break free.

3. What about making porn on the internet illegal? I know people will still find ways around it, but at least maybe it won't be so overt. Even making pop up windows for porn illegal would help. That is a door for a lot of pastors sitting alone in their offices studying for sermons, and this opens up a whole "new" world for them. Right now, there is nothing against an autoparts store being paid to allow a pop up porn window on their site. This happened to my husband, and he got me, and then deleted the whole website and blocked it. But most people do not have the wisdom to do this.

Porn is something that used to be done in secret. I think in some cases it still is. But it is worrisome in terms of the way youth and young people glorify it to each other.

4. Maybe just calling it "wrong" is a start. No need to moralize! Just show the damage it does to the brain and relationships! There will always be those who don't care, but maybe a warning, making it illegal, might help?

Don't hesitate to add your suggestions on how to stop this epidemic Willie. At least I am sure you won't post that the end is near, so no need to be concerned.

None of these suggestions honestly FIX anything. Not trying to be disrespectful but they really just don't. You can say "Don't ever start!" all you want but that would've done absolutely nothing for me. My first exposure I was in single digit ages and it wasn't by choice.

None of these solutions address the real issue...they put a band aid on it.
I'm really trying to avoid this thread lol

 

[eph610]

I hesitate to reply on this thread, because I am addicted to internet porn. However, maybe the thread can help me and possibly my response can shed some light for everyone else here.
1. It can't be any easier to get. Anyone of any age can get it. Your cell doesn't know how old you are and can't stop you when you tell it you're 18.
2. The mindset is it's just a thrill. It's difficult to imagine how it hurts anyone else. Everyone there looks like they're enjoying it.
3. You cannot ban something from the Internet. First, it will only make it more desirable, second, there are always back doors.
I'm not trying to justify it. I want to walk away, but it is like a drug. I don't know the science behind it, but I can feel my mind and body drawn to it. I've been in church for years and have heard all the reasons why to walk, but it's a daily struggle.

I had the same excuses you do, but it was not until I started seeing the women as someones daughter or baby girl that I stopped thinking it never hurt anyone.....Porn hurts everyone, even those that "act" in it.

I pray that you continue to seek help and know that Jesus is willing if you are....Its not going to be instant deliverance for sure...

 

[eph610]

BUY THE BOOK.

Willie,
Have you ever read John Bevere's testimony on his own porn addiction? It is very good.