I kind of think Lizzie was too hard on Darcy. She was right to be angry with him for thwarting Jane's romance with Bingley. But in his defense, he thought Jane did not love Bingley and was a gold digger. He jumped to the wrong conclusion. I like to look at it from his point of view. He is extremely wealthy and well placed. He has to constantly be on guard against scheming women who fawn all over him just because they are attracted to his money and fine figure. It makes him standoffish.
He meets a woman, whom he thinks is like all the rest- but the more he sees her, the more he likes her. She is NOT impressed by his money and is real. He can hardly believe his good fortune, he's found a genuine woman at last. He doesn't want to love her, her family is embarrassing, it will be a step down to marry her, his family (Lady Catherine de Bourgh and probably others) will be angry and make a fuss. There are going to be a lot of problems. He sees his prospective mother-in-law and shudders.
I don't know, in a way, isn't it a little MORE romantic to be in love against your will? It certainly isn't calculating, that is for sure. This is not a Mr. Collins, we're dealing with here, thinking about what is practical. He put his case badly, but I could not have rejected him, not if he said he loved me although it isn't practical. She regrets saying all those awful things to him, later.