Is it best to see the good in others?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
A

ALostSoul

Guest
#1
#1
My wife and I had a debate on seeing the good in others from the beginning or to stay neutral and get to know them. I have always lived by giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and go into meeting all people as if they were good people. This often leads to me being hurt or disappointed when I find out there true nature. She always goes into things thinking neutral towards people and finding out if they are to be trusted or not.

I see my view as love thy neighbor and even further love thy enemy. I'd always prefer to put faith and trust in someone and find out later they were bad people than to go into it with no trust.

Thoughts?
 
B

BarlyGurl

Guest
#2
#2
[h=2]Is it best to see the good in others?[/h]Well yes... but not to the exclusion of something negative that should be given proper attention. You wouldn't hand that small person off to a stranger would you??? just because the seem nice??? I generally consider most people to be on the same plane as "non-beleivers" (capable of anything) until I see some real fruit and salvation testimony from them and then see where they are at in terms of maturity. Putting faith and trust in someone based on no cause to is neither smart nor scriptural. Someone can surely FOOL you... but blindly making yourself available to be victimized is not good stewardship of your self or your family...sorry... you asked.
 
L

loveme1

Senior Member
#3
Oct 30, 2011
8,086
190
63
#3
What changes all things is Love and Forgiveness.

This i learnt the hard way.
 
T

tdrew777

Guest
#4
#4
Satan accuses of sin - he points it out in a way that brings hopelessness and death. The Holy Spirit convicts of sin in a way that leads to life and repentance. Christ cleans us up from sin - we stand justified even before we are sanctified - the mystery is great! Seeing people through Christ's eyes is to see them as they "really are". When the Holy Spirit brings up sin, He brings it up before the most limited audience possible for the purpose of doing away with it and returning everything to "normal" - in Christ. Satan ALWAYS wants to bring up sin, before the largest possible audience. See people in the Holy Spirit through the eyes of Christ. Don't be afraid or discourged when (not if) you are disappointed.

Ps 91:7 A thousand shall fall at thy side, And ten thousand at thy right hand; But it shall not come nigh thee.

As for trusting people with your little ones - trust only that part of your family that is reliable. And do not be quick to spiritualize what "family" means.
 
A

Abiding

Guest
#5
#5
i always want to taste the cookies first
 
A

ALostSoul

Guest
#6
#6
I definitely didn't mean trusting random people with my children i just meant giving people the benefit of doubt that they are good people and not go into meeting new people with thoughts that they are possibly bad.
 
pickles

pickles

Senior Member
#7
Apr 20, 2009
14,479
182
63
#7
My husband and I used to have the same debate, I was for the good. :)
But after 31 years of marraige, he finnally admited I was right. ;) just kidding.
Actually he is now looking for the good, and Ive realised that such does not matter anymore.
Because I relaised that even though looking for the good is good, that we are called not to looking to good as reason to accept another.
But accepting and loving others not because of who they are, or because they are good, but as Jesus showed us, loving them because they are.
In doing this, one doesnt need a reason to love the other, wether good or bad, one loves because Jesus in us, loves us all.
The good thing is? That no longer is one disapointed if one is not what one thought they were, and no longer does one mesure or judge them because of Jesus, One simply sees them through Jesus's eyes, and delights in the person God created.
The amazing thing is? One sees in the other, how all is made good, and like one's self, all that is needed is Jesus to perfect one.

God bless
pickles
 
RickyZ

RickyZ

Senior Member
#8
Sep 20, 2012
9,635
787
113
#8
I give everyone the consideration and respect God would have me give them up until the time they show themselves to be unworthy of it. Problem is that usually only takes 5 - 10 minutes these days. Humans suck, but I give everyone a chance to not suck before I stick them in the spam folder.
 
P

psychomom

Guest
#9
#9
wise as serpents,innocent as doves?

:)
 
H

hattiebod

Guest
#10
#10
I think if we can live with the 'glass half full' not half empty, we can recieve many things that may otherwise pass us by. I do not just mean practical things but we will live, we will place ourselves in a more positive and optimistic environment, daily. This will have a positive effect on us, we will be walking through live expecting good things, not bad and always looking over our shoulder. If we don't, it's a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy really, if we expect gloom and doom we shall probably get gloom and doom! We are not all the same, you say you and your wife have been discussing this. My husband is a planner, he is a person who does not run into spontaneity very often :) he does tend to be cautious, does not always look for the good but stands back....none of this is bad per se, but it does mean he misses out sometimes! In all things, as a Christian, I have hope, the sure hope, all things will work out for the good for me, if I keep my eyes on God. This does not mean I will always meet good, kind, well meaning folks but it does mean I will meet who God wants me to meet and through those meetings, staying open to being Christs hands and feet on this earth, amazing things can happen for both of us! <><
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#11
#11
ALostSoul said:
My wife and I had a debate on seeing the good in others from the beginning or to stay neutral and get to know them. I have always lived by giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and go into meeting all people as if they were good people. This often leads to me being hurt or disappointed when I find out there true nature. She always goes into things thinking neutral towards people and finding out if they are to be trusted or not.

I see my view as love thy neighbor and even further love thy enemy. I'd always prefer to put faith and trust in someone and find out later they were bad people than to go into it with no trust.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...
I tend to view people as neutral until I get to know them but treat them as a friend even after finding out they are my enemy because that is what God tells us to do.

how I treat the person only differs a little. just because you don't fully trust a person does not mean you don't love them.

for example if you have a loved one who is a drug addict and trying to come clean, you might hide your money so they can't buy more drugs. not because you DON'T love them but because you DO and you know them well enough to do things for their own good even if they don't want you too.
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#12
#12
I live with the hope that even though when we met they were my enemies and enemies to God. God will reach out and bring them godly sorrow that works repentance and I will eventually be able to call them brothers and sisters in Christ.

God does not tell us to think good of everyone. I think it would be better to look and see people as they are and then hope and pray and help them grow into the good people they can become in Christ. We are to see reality both in the present and the possible future.

i'm not sure if that makes any sense but I've got to get the kids ready for school :)

"You know your on cc too much when checking threads becomes a part of your morning routine. " lol yeppers.
 
homwardbound

homwardbound

Senior Member
#13
Oct 24, 2012
15,126
135
63
#13
ALostSoul said:
My wife and I had a debate on seeing the good in others from the beginning or to stay neutral and get to know them. I have always lived by giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and go into meeting all people as if they were good people. This often leads to me being hurt or disappointed when I find out there true nature. She always goes into things thinking neutral towards people and finding out if they are to be trusted or not.

I see my view as love thy neighbor and even further love thy enemy. I'd always prefer to put faith and trust in someone and find out later they were bad people than to go into it with no trust.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...
Oh how I and probably a lot of people have done this exactly and have been ripped off stolen from taken advantage of and so on. So I learnt trust noone but God then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will be truly loving your neighbor as what God intended for you to do forsaking the deception of this world as in one pretending to love so they can get away with thier evil ways masquerading as being good when they are not, I remember before I changed my mind and believed God is the only way, the truth, and the Life there was no other way to recieve his type of Love and hear except through and by bleief

Ex: You step over a baby (CHRISTIAN) or a mature or not yet a believer and do not help them in thier slump because you know that is what you are to do by the directions of God via the Holy Ghost that relates to you what God wants you to do.
Now in doing this others will revile you for this and make you feel guilty and all this is is flesh in the way and trying to get you get your flesh in the way and thus by helping these that you by God are not to, but do because of what others say and do to you would not be helping from God'd perspective. yes from the worlds perspective you would and would recieve the worlds rewards and truly that is the only reward one would ever get, praise from the world
Just read the story of King Nebechenezzar when he had to chew the cud of the ground in suffering for twelve years in order to learn truth, and today by the world's love we are not discerning whether this or that person or persons need to go through the fire here and now to learn truth. I seek for God to tell me whether to help them out by his grace or by his grace let them go through the fire, that is what I ask first and formost now
And today I am glad I have gone through the fire and thier might even be more fire to go through and as Peter said count it all Joy everything good or bad and learn God will love you through it all. I have been Shot, Stabbed, left to die, had a tire machine blow up and hit me in the face, been strangled to death, from 14 through to 21 had three deaths in the family immediate, sister was 18, dad was 63, brother was 33, was abused severely in boot camp, and the last thing that was a major happpening was last nov. 2012 put into surgery for ganggrene in my groin and had all dead skin removed and I lived here and now but was ready to go home. I do not know about anyone else, but I count all of this as Joy there is training in all this, and I know that nothing absolutely nothing can seperate me from the LOVE of God, and I have no ill feelings for all the abuse from others, for I have been frogiven for my own abuse that is in the past are forgiven By God back at the cross of Christ
So these are my thoughts as you asked.
Bottom line trust God in all things and ask in all things before doing what this world has taught you, there are many mistakes even in our Churches, and God wants a personal relationship then you go out and pass out his Love as you go in this world
Thank you homwardbound
 
homwardbound

homwardbound

Senior Member
#14
Oct 24, 2012
15,126
135
63
#14
ALostSoul said:
I definitely didn't mean trusting random people with my children i just meant giving people the benefit of doubt that they are good people and not go into meeting new people with thoughts that they are possibly bad.
Click to expand...
And Jesus said, in matthew 19:16-17 there is none good except his Father therefore the only ones that are doing good are the ones in Christ that believe have recieved the new life through belief are showing Father's good as Jesus did perfectly and gaveus the Holy Ghost through belief to doas he did by by belief and belief works follow belief in him you will know a tree by its fruit. the eye is the light to the Soul
 
homwardbound

homwardbound

Senior Member
#15
Oct 24, 2012
15,126
135
63
#15
pickles said:
My husband and I used to have the same debate, I was for the good. :)
But after 31 years of marraige, he finnally admited I was right. ;) just kidding.
Actually he is now looking for the good, and Ive realised that such does not matter anymore.
Because I relaised that even though looking for the good is good, that we are called not to looking to good as reason to accept another.
But accepting and loving others not because of who they are, or because they are good, but as Jesus showed us, loving them because they are.
In doing this, one doesnt need a reason to love the other, wether good or bad, one loves because Jesus in us, loves us all.
The good thing is? That no longer is one disapointed if one is not what one thought they were, and no longer does one mesure or judge them because of Jesus, One simply sees them through Jesus's eyes, and delights in the person God created.
The amazing thing is? One sees in the other, how all is made good, and like one's self, all that is needed is Jesus to perfect one.

God bless
pickles
Click to expand...
The Love, kindness is meant to lead one to repentance as in to belief from unbelief thanks Pickles
 
tribesman

tribesman

Senior Member
#16
Oct 13, 2011
4,621
281
83
#16
ALostSoul said:
...Thoughts?
Click to expand...
This is my thought on it:

Luke.18

[18] And a certain ruler asked him, saying, Good Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?
[19] And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? none is good, save one, that is, God.
Click to expand...
 
J

jimmydiggs

Guest
#17
#17
I'm not sure there is anything good about the unregenerate. Regenerate humans certainly aren't much improved.
 
tribesman

tribesman

Senior Member
#18
Oct 13, 2011
4,621
281
83
#18
jimmydiggs said:
I'm not sure there is anything good about the unregenerate. Regenerate humans certainly aren't much improved.
Click to expand...
They are all abominable. All hated by God and hating God. Nuff' said.
 
tribesman

tribesman

Senior Member
#19
Oct 13, 2011
4,621
281
83
#19
jimmydiggs said:
I'm not sure there is anything good about the unregenerate. Regenerate humans certainly aren't much improved.
Click to expand...
tribesman said:
They are all abominable. All hated by God and hating God. Nuff' said.
Click to expand...
LOL. Posted too quick. Didn't see that you wrote unregenerate in the first and regenerate in the next sentence. My statement goes only for the unregenerate.

Paul described it this way:

Tit.3

[3] For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another.
Click to expand...
 
T

tdrew777

Guest
#20
#20
jimmydiggs said:
I'm not sure there is anything good about the unregenerate. Regenerate humans certainly aren't much improved.
Click to expand...
That is true, if you see with the eyes of flesh. Statistically, there is not much difference between the church and the world.

But through the eyes of Christ, regeneration makes all the difference in the universe. Our sustenance does not come from the church, but through the Holy Spirit. If you depend on the church you will be disappointed. But if you fail to see the value of the church by looking at her through the eyes of flesh, you will lose all that is valuable in life.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.